


Senioritis

by memedotparker



Category: High school drama - Fandom, Liz Allen - Fandom, Mystery - Fandom, Teen drama - Fandom, michelle jones & peter parker - Fandom, michelle jones - Fandom, ned leeds - Fandom, peter parker - Fandom
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-18
Updated: 2019-03-18
Packaged: 2019-11-23 20:40:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 20
Words: 113,718
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18156794
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/memedotparker/pseuds/memedotparker
Summary: What happened to you MJ? Who hurt you?Peter is a junior in high school looking for popularity. He finally has a chance to prove himself worthy to his crush and her senior friends. But after an eventful night, he realises there are many more things that he's looking her.





	1. Lover Boy

**Author's Note:**

> Peter is not Spider-Man in this fanfic, or at least hasn't discovered that he has powers yet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Instagram for writers: @memedotparker @meme.tuwaine @meme.holland

**_Peter is not Spider-Man in this story. He's in his Junior year of high school._ **

**_*_ ** _tap, tap, tap*_

Ned always tapped his pencil against the desk. And it _always_ got on Peter's nerves. But somehow, today, it was close to unbearable.

* _tap, tap, tap*_  
_*tap, tap-*_

"Dude, can you stop?" Peter nearly shouted, before bringing his voice down to a whisper. "It's super annoying."

"You know I can't help it." Ned mumbled.

Peter sighed.

He hated lab class. He hated the fact that they sat on the desk right in front of the teacher, and that Ned was so much better at Chemistry, and how Ned tapped his pencil on his desk continuously, and how quickly he got angry, and how sincere Ned's apology was.

"Here....we need more sodium hydroxide..." Ned said, fumbling with the chemicals in front of him.

Peter wasn't concentrating. It was nearly time for the final bell and he could hear his stomach rumbling.

 _Concentrate,_ he thought.

He ripped out yet another page in his lab book then began to scribble down notes, furiously. Ned dictated to him, and he simply wrote stuff down.

When the bell rang, Peter nearly jumped out of his seat.

"Wait up!" Ned called after Peter, but he was already shuffling his way past people and making a beeline for the door.

For some reason, everything and everyone was getting on his nerves today. He had no interest in helping Ned clear up after lab. He opened his locker, shoved his books in it and slammed it so hard, that his fingers started to ache.

"Jesus, Parker..."

He turned around to see MJ standing behind him. He was confused as to why she was actually addressing him in public. She'd always been kind of a bitch to everyone, especially him. The last time they spoke, last semester, he could remember MJ telling him to go fuck himself.

"What do you want?" Peter said, rolling his eyes.

MJ laughed. In that weird, goofy, annoying way. Every time he looked at her, she appeared more odd to him. Her brown, curly hair was never brushed and always awkwardly parted. She always stood with one foot in front of the other, like she was impatient, and she was wearing those weird, faded mom jeans and her crusty midtown high jumper.

"You look a little flustered..." she muttered, half-smiling.

He ignored her.

"Anyways, loser....I know you were invited to Liz's party. Shock horror. I mean, it's a really Liz thing to do. She's always trying to play the Good Samaritan, you know, taking pity on the _losers_ and inviting them-"

"Shut the hell up, MJ-" Peter started.

"Anyways, she's only inviting you because you'll be a good one night stand or whatever. She likes younger guys. What a cougar-"

"Get to the point-"

" I obviously didn't get invited. I don't really care to conform to all the teenage societal norms, blah blah blah....basically, I need you to get me into the party."

He really felt like shoving her. Like _really_ hard.  
"MJ....I'm afraid insulting people is not how to get what you want." Peter sighed, draping his bag round his shoulder.

"Wait, wait, wait!" MJ shouted.

He turned around, irritated.

She reached in her jeans pocket, pulling out a tampon at first, then a poorly folded piece of paper.

"Here."

Peter took the piece of paper from her. Two tickets to see Drake and Travis Scott.  
"Where the hell did you get these?" Peter said, his eyes widening. "They were literally sold out-"

"My Dad knows a guy." MJ replied. "Get me into Liz's party and they're all yours."

"Liz won't listen to me-"

"Oh, shut up, Peter! She thinks you're the cutest new puppy in the pen. Peter this, Peter that. Oh my gosh, I wanna ride Peter into the sunset-"

"Shhhh!" Peter hissed, blushing profusely. "Why do you care about the party anyway?" He shrugged.

"I'm trying to get into this guy's pants. And I know for a fact that he's going to be there. And before you ask, no, I'm not going to tell you who. Come on, lover boy. Just drop my name Liz's way. Those tickets are VIP! You can take your other loser friend, what's his name?"

Peter rolled his eyes for the tenth time that day.

"Fine. I'll....I'll text her."

"Good boy." MJ whispered.

She turned around and began walking down the hallway. He watched her go, muttering swear words under his breath, as he placed a hand to his cheek.

Shit, he really was burning up. He couldn't believe Liz might have actually said those kind of things about him. No, she couldn't have. MJ was surely just making things up to make him do her will. He shoved the tickets in his pocket, then turned the other way, heading for the double doors.

"Hey....make sure you get laid," he heard a guy that he recognized from Physics class say to him.

He just laughed nervously and continued walking.

"Peter!" Flash called behind him. "I heard Liz likes a show! Make sure you give it to her!"  
He swallowed and pushed his way through the doors, just as he heard some girls erupt in laughter.

"Flash is such a dick..." he muttered, under his breath.

But Flash was always a dick. That wasn't quite what was bothering him. He'd had a massive crush on Liz ever since he was a freshman. And suddenly, after he started working out and kind of 'glowed up', she started to take interest in him. She would ask him to come and sit with her at lunch, and to come over to her house to tutor her in math. He'd expected she would invite him to her 18th but soon, rumors started flying around that Liz was actually totally into him. He was flattered. Even though he hardly saw her around school and she'd never said anything of the sort to him in person.

They had never even made out.

Peter got on his bike. His phone was ringing in his pocket because he knew Ned was pissed at him but all he wanted to do was get home to Aunt May so he could complain about how crappy school was today...and maybe try calling Liz about MJ?

When he got to the apartment, May was doing Yoga- and he wasn't surprised.

"Peter!" She exclaimed, mid- stretch. Peter could hear the loud voice of the yoga instructor, echoing through May's laptop. "How was school?"

"Alright." He said, dumping his bag on the chair. "Did I tell you I had a party tomorrow?"

"Yes, I think you've told me constantly for two weeks." May laughed, rolling up her yoga mat.

Their place was small. Really small. But it felt like home. May's Room, Peter's Room, and the combined living room and kitchen. It was all he needed, though.

He lay down on the couch as May opened up the fridge.

"We have no food...again..." she sighed.

"Ned always comes over and snacks on everything. Even the vegetables." Peter said, making himself laugh.

"Oh, I love that boy." May said, grabbing her keys. "I'm going to the grocery store and doing a massive food haul. We have to stock up for thanksgiving. Do you want anything?"

"Nah, I'm good." Peter said, hurling himself off the couch.

He walked up to Aunt May and kissed her on the cheek.

"Love you, I'll be back in an hour or two." She said, before slipping out of the door.

Peter put a hand to his head, just as his phone started ringing.

"Aaaagh, Ned, fuck off...."

His voice trailed off as he saw Liz's name on his phone. A sense of panic began to seep through him and he didn't know why. He made his way to his room and locked the door behind him. He knew no one was around to walk in on him, but this had become a routine when he spoke to Liz.

He lay down on his bed, closed his eyes then took a deep breath.

"Hey." He said, as the sunlight from his blinds began to burn his eyes.

"Hi, Peter."

Liz's voice was like silk. It was so smooth and deep. He could listen to her talk forever.

"I didn't see you at school today." Peter said, turning over onto his side, away from the sun.

"That's why I'm calling. My Dad let me stay home. I told him I had a cold, but really, I hadn't done any of the biology homework and I didn't want Miss Fisher to roast my ass."

Peter laughed. "Oh, okay." He mumbled.

"I'm so stoked for tomorrow. My Dad's letting us have a few drinks-even though I wanted more- and the pool's going to be heated." She said, excitedly.

He bit his lip. He was picturing Liz in a sexy bikini. Like maybe a black two piece that would show off her curves. Or maybe she'd wear a one piece- she'd look good in both.

"Me too...I can't wait." Peter said.

Then he realized he had to get MJ into the party somehow.

"Umm..." Peter started off. "Do you know MJ?"

"Frizzy hair. Awkward af. Yes." Liz replied.

"Well, I don't know, I think maybe you should consider inviting her. She seemed a bit left out at school today."

"Why?"

"I don't know...she's a good source for alcohol. That's all I'm saying."

"Hmm.." Liz hummed.

Peter frowned. He wished he didn't have to do this at all. He wished he had just left school before MJ could approach him.

"Yeah, sure, why not?" Liz said.

 _Yes_ he thought.

"Cool. I'll let her know." He said.

"Well, I gotta go. But I'll see you soon, babe."  
He nearly choked. She'd never called him 'babe' before.

He shrugged off his sweater. He couldn't help but overthink-what if Liz actually wanted to have sex with him tomorrow night? What would he do? She'd probably been with loads of guys before him. Imagine if he was such a disappointment and she told everyone at school about it.

He was being silly, of course. MJ had worked him up and put these silly thoughts in his head.  
He put on his glasses, blasted some Travis Scott from his speakers and decided to do some homework and just forget about it all. He was worrying about nothing.  
  
  


Saturday rolled around so much quicker than he had anticipated. And soon it was 8pm and he was already late for Liz's party. ****

May was working a night shift at her job just down the block that evening. She said something along the lines of make sure you have the apartment keys- don't let anyone put anything in your drink-drive safely- Peter wasn't sure...he was so nervous, that it was a bit of a blur.

Peter looked at himself in the mirror in his room- he was pretty sure Liz had reiterated that the party was going to be casual _,_ but he couldn't help feeling underdressed. He had a black Calvin Klein T- shirt on, on top of his black swimming shorts. He ran his hands through his curls several times in a row. Liz had that said she loved his hair but he kind of wanted to get it cut.

He sighed heavily, laughing at how ridiculous this whole thing was. When did _he_ start caring about how he looked?

He locked up the apartment. When he had got down the elevator, his phone began to ring in his pocket. Ned. He felt bad for ignoring all of Ned's calls and messages last night. So he picked up.

"Hey, Ned." He said, unlocking May's car.

 _"_ I've called you about five hundred times, Peter, what the hell is going on?"

"Nothing! Nothing..." Peter said, as he got in the car. He put Ned on speaker, shoved his seatbelt on and began to drive.

"Wait...are you driving?" Ned exclaimed.

"Yeah, Ned I'm going to Liz's party-"

"You didn't even tell me you got invited to Liz's party!"

"Ned, it's not a big deal..."

"No, Peter!" Ned shouted. "It _is_ a big deal! We've both been crushing on her since 9th grade. And I'm kind of pissed off you didn't tell me, or ask her to invite me ** _-"_**

 ** _"_** Ned-"

"I know you're afraid I'll embarrass you or something, but I thought we were in this together! You totally bailed on me yesterday, you ignored all my calls, and I've been stuck on the same fucking question in the math homework because of you. I get you're too cool for me and all."

"Ned!" Peter shouted.

"No, Peter! Have fun at Liz's party, okay? Just don't talk to me on Monday...."

"Ned, wait-"

But Ned had already cut the call off. Peter was angry with himself but he pursed his lips tightly and focused on the road. He had been a good friend to Ned all his life. Nothing was going to change- he would just have to apologize to him on Monday.

Liz's house was quite a while away. In the fancy part of town. He pulled up, and he began to feel really shit about the whole Ned situation.

When he had walked up to Liz's door, clutching the gift he had wrapped for her, there was a legitimate body guard that checked his pockets to make sure he didn't have any drugs on him. He guessed that that was courtesy of Liz's Dad.  
He heard the music intensely now- he thought it could have been Kendrick Lamar- anyway that didn't matter.

He noticed a stack of presents to his right, from different people, all addressed to Liz and set his own gift down beside them. He suddenly felt quite claustrophobic in the living room. Everyone was dancing, well at least trying to dance. There were a number of people making out.

_Find Liz, find Liz._

"Peter!"

Peter could recognize Flash's annoying, nasal voice from miles away. "Here, drink up. You're late."

Peter looked down at the drink. It smelt strongly of vodka and strawberry.

"Where's Liz?" Peter had to shout, over the music.

"By the pool!" Flash shouted back. "She's with a bunch of seniors, super exclusive. But she said she was waiting for you."

Peter's eyes lit up.

He placed the drink Flash gave him on a ledge and began to squeeze through the crowd of sweaty, drunk people. All he kept thinking was how huge her house was and how he didn't want to get lost.

There was no sign of MJ which was a relief, as he was in no mood to talk to her. He _had_ sent her a Snapchat that Liz said she could come and she had replied saying 'thanks.' After what seemed like forever, he came across some glass sliding doors and walked through, sliding the door shut behind him.

He was literally exhausted from all that  
walking.

He heard voices. Following a stoney path, he finally came across the pool.

"Peter!" He heard a guy cheer. There were about ten seniors, other than Liz. "Come join us!"

Then he spotted Liz in the pool. She wasn't wearing a black bikini. It was a bright red two piece. His lips parted slightly, because she looked so amazing. Her brown, slim body looked just as flawless as he had imagined. Her black straight hair was slightly damp, but he really liked how it looked on her.

He thought she was perfect.

Some Migos was playing out of a small speaker.

"Oh my god, Peter!" Liz laughed. "Get in here!"  
Peter set his phone and keys down on a nearby table then pulled his shirt up over his head, before bending down to take off his adidas.

"Woah, six pack alert..." He heard one of the girls say. Was her name Maya? He wasn't quite sure.

He got in the pool carefully and swam up to where Liz was, by the shallow end. She immediately wrapped her arms around him, a red cup in her hand. He could tell that she was a little bit drunk already, due to how much she was swaying.

"I'm so glad you could make it..." she whispered, laying her head down on his shoulder.

The other seniors weren't really paying attention to them. He had expected that everyone would be staring at him, but he was wrong.

Somebody turned up the music louder. Liz giggled again.

"This is my favourite song." She said.

Peter nodded, slightly. He wasn't sure why. I guess he couldn't really believe this was happening. What do you do when you're holding the most popular girl in school?  
Liz was the one who went in to kiss Peter. It was unexpected, and made Peter rock back on his heels slightly, but he was holding on her to waist firmly and she still had her arms wrapped around him.

They'd never done this before.

But it felt quite natural and he didn't want to mess anything up. He could taste the alcohol on her tongue.

"Get a room guys...." He thought he heard Maya say.

Liz broke away after what felt like an eternity. She stared into his eyes, still swaying, so he had to hold her very carefully.

"Are you okay?" He asked her.

She nodded, before bringing the red cup up to her lips and downing what was left in it.

"Hey someone, pass Peter a drink!" Liz shouted.

Maya was talking to some other guys in the pool but swam up to the makeshift bar at the side of the pool. There were all sorts of bottles there, and he wasn't sure what kind of concoction she was making.

"Peter, you feeling like a little rum today? It's so good!" Maya exclaimed.

"Sure." Peter said, as she swam up to them and handed him the drink.

She was wearing a white one piece, that showed off quite a lot of her cleavage, and her blonde hair looked brown because it was drenched.

Peter took one sip. It was _strong._

He set his cup down by the pool side. Liz was kind of laughing at him, and he wasn't sure whether it was because she was drunk or because of the face he made after he drank the rum.

"What?" He smiled.

She ran a hand through his curls then effortlessly hoisted herself up to sit on the ledge of the pool. She leaned down to kiss him, holding his face between her fingers. His hands were on her thighs.

 _This is insane_ he thought.

He was literally making out with the hottest girl in the school.

After she broke away, Liz stood up on her feet, nearly falling over. Peter got out of the pool, quickly. Mostly because he was worried that she was going to walk into a wall.

"Come with me." She said, clutching his hand with her perfectly manicured one.

She grabbed some towels with the other hand and they both walked barefoot, back down the stoney path, but instead of making a left, they made a right to what sort of resembled a shed. When Liz turned on the lights, Peter saw a pool table, a massive television screen and a fire, and then far off in a corner, this massive bed with a red velvet rug beneath it.

"My dad's doing it up." Liz said, toweling herself dry, and handing Peter the other towel. "Pretty cool right?"

Peter looked around in awe. He couldn't believe he was actually here, with her.  
Just as he was getting dry too, Liz had already poured them both a glass of prosecco from a mini fridge under a cabinet next to the door.  
_God, how much booze is there in this place?_ He thought.

"Your place is really nice." Peter said, rubbing the towel against his legs.

"Thanks..." she said, as she basically downed her own glass. "You like prosecco?"

"I'm good." Peter smiled, starting to feel really self conscious all of a sudden.

Liz was swaying again. This time she swayed so much to the left and lost her balance but Peter quickly caught her.

"Hey, hey..." Peter said, as he steadied her. "Do you need to lie down?"

Liz nodded, her eyes sort of half open. Peter walked up to the bed and lay Liz down on it.

"Thanks, Peter." Liz said.

He could still hear the rumble of the music coming from the party.

He looked down at her body, and felt way out of his comfort zone. Peter was sat on the edge of the bed, his heart beating a little faster.  
Liz ran one hand down his arm and pulled him a little closer. He knew she wanted him to kiss her so that's what he did. He felt a sharp tingle in his spine, and that overwhelming dazed feeling, like he was dreaming.Liz just kept on kissing him back.She sat up slowly, before getting up on her knees.

Peter didn't know what to do. He'd barely gotten this far with any girl, yet alone Liz Allen. But he was also aware that she was wasted.

Maybe she didn't even _want_ this.

As Liz began to undo her bikini strap, Peter broke away quickly.

"What?" Liz said, confused, placing a hand on her head. "Ow..."

"Liz, you're drunk." Peter said.

"No, I'm not!" Liz shouted, but her words were slurred. "Peter, I'm not...."

She placed her hands on his shoulders. God, didn't she know thathe wanted her so bad? But the last thing he wanted to do was take advantage of her.

He had one hand on her back, and slowly laid her down back on the bed.

Liz looked confused.

"What the fuck, Peter...." Liz said, her words awkwardly spaced out.

"I'm sorry." He sighed, getting up and walking up to the shed door.

She was basically asleep when he left her. He closed the door behind him and put his head in his hands. He really wanted to get his phone but he couldn't go back and face all the seniors without Liz by his side.

He heard footsteps coming up the path, and saw the face of one of the boys. He towered over Peter. What was his name again? The one with the ombré hairdo. Andrew?

"Hey, Parker." He said. "So, you guys are done having sex already?"

"We didn't have sex." Peter said, almost instantly.

"What, why?" Andrew exclaimed. "She looked so horny for you in the pool-"

"That's because she's drunk out of her mind." Peter sighed, trying to move out of Andrew's way.

"What? Dude, it doesn't matter how drunk she is. Go back in there and make her happy." He said.

Peter felt utterly helpless. He was kind of mad at himself for wanting his first time to be more than just a drunk fling with Liz.

"No!" Peter said, angrily. "She's. Drunk. I'm not gonna do that."

"You're such a pussy..." Andrew said, opening the door to the shed.

"Hey, she's asleep!" Peter shouted.

Andrew pushed him back so forcefully, that he landed on his back on the concrete.

"Pussy Parker. I thought you could redeem yourself. Yeah you're hot and all, but you're still going to be a loser on Monday."

Andrew slammed the shed door shut, just as Peter felt a surge of pain soaring through his back. He rolled over onto his side.

Now he hated himself even more thatAndrew was in there with Liz. He stood up and banged on the door with his fist. But there was nothing. The door was locked.

"Shit!" He shouted. "Shit, shit!"

 ** _"_** Peter!"

He turned around to see MJ standing behind him. Her hair was actually brushed for once and she was wearing a flowery, pink dress. He didn't want to talk to her.

"Go away, MJ." Peter said.

"Okay, fine. Just quit acting like a psycho.  
Everyone's staring at you."

Peter glanced up at the glass doors and he could see some people laughing at him. Some he recognized as jocks, some he knew from debate club. Had they all seen what went down with Andrew?

He flushed red.

"Are you sad because you didn't get laid?" MJ laughed, her brown eyes glistening.

"Shut up." He muttered, pushing past her.

He made his way through the glass doors. The music was thumping so loud in his ears, that he felt sick. And he felt the eyes of many people on him.

He just wanted to go home.

"Hey, Peter. How was sex with Liz?" Someone called out. "We watched you go in and come out like two seconds later."

"That quick?" Someone else shouted. It sounded like a girl. "Wow....Peter's so horny...."

Peter felt tears burning in his eyes. He couldn't believe he had continuously stood Ned up to be humiliated at this party.He thought he could earn them a shit ton of credit at school for showing up, but instead, they were going to be even bigger losers than they already were. He found a lone couch at the back of the living room and sat on it. His back was still aching like crazy.

He touched where he had been cut and saw the bright red blood on his fingers.

"Fuck." He muttered.

He looked up and a boy was standing in front of him. It was Tyler - from debate club, his chocolate skin glistening with sweat.

"Here, Peter." He said, handing Peter a bottle of vodka. "You're not gonna get through this party if you don't drink-"

"I'm driving home, Tyler-"

"Fuck that, man." Tyler hissed, sitting down next to Peter. "You know...I actually really wanna know if you really had sex with Liz."

Peter opened the bottle and took a huge swig.

"No." He replied, irritated.

"Oh, I understand...you weren't ready? It's always good to wait, Peter. My first experience was shit-"

"Tyler, shut up, thanks." Peter said, taking another huge swig of the vodka.

He lay back, resting his head on the back of the couch. He suddenly felt really cold and really naked. It sounded lame, but he just wanted May to kiss him on the forehead and tell him high school was trash.

He couldn't recall when Tyler handed him another bottle. Or another bottle. He just kept drinkinguntil the pain in his back had numbed. Until he wasn't even thinking about Liz. And then at some point, he blacked out and fell to the floor.  
  
  


"Peter...."

Peter's eyes slowly fluttered open. The ceiling was spinning. Everything was spinning. He suddenly felt immensely ill. He tried to sit up, feeling the cold touch of delicate hands, steadying him.

"I'm gonna be sick...." He muttered.

He was steered to a bathroom, and he knelt over the toilet bowl. It just feltlike everything he had just drank came out. Straight up clear liquid.

"I'm sorry...I'm sorry." He kept muttering, though he didn't even know who he was with or who he was talking to.

He flushed the toilet then felt the press of an ice cold flannel on his face. His vision was blurred but he could just about make out MJ's face.

"Peter, it's 2am..." she said. "I found your keys and your phone by the pool."

Peter winced. He couldn't believe that he had been so irresponsible.

"Where's.....where's Liz?" He asked.

"Ugh, I don't know okay?" MJ shouted. "You're wasted, so I'm going to drive you home."

"No." Peter muttered, closing his eyes again.

"Yes. Unless you wanna die, you idiot."

He slowly stood up to his feet. He really couldn't feel much but he knew when he felt his cheek on the leather seat of the car and he could sort of feel the engine rumble beneath him as it started.

Was MJ really driving him home? Why did she care?

"What floor are you on?" He heard MJ say at some point.

"What?"

"There are sixteen floors here, Parker. Which fucking floor is your apartment on?"

"Umm...." Peter mumbled.

It felt as though there was vodka in his brain.  
"Floor eight, number 23." He said.

When he felt the jolt of the elevator, his knees gave in and he fell to the floor.

"Jesus, Parker!" He heard.

He felt it when the elevator stopped moving and felt the bright light against his eyes when the door opened. MJ grabbed his hand forcefully, helping him to his feet.

She unlocked the apartment door, one hand still linked in his and they nearly both fell into the apartment. He wasn't too sure how she could tell which one was his room but soon, he felt the warmth of his soft duvet on his back as he laid down.

His eyes opened again.

MJ was standing over him. This time, he could make out the features of her appearance. Her mascara was drooping down her face and her dress torn slightly.

"Woah..." He muttered, barely able to stay awake. "What happened to you?"

MJ wiped her cheek with the back of her hand then folded her arms. He wasn't sure if they were tears or mascara.

"I could ask you the same thing."

Her voice was shaking, but his head hurt so much that he couldn't tell if it was just his mind playing tricks on him.

"Are you gonna get home okay?" He asked, his words slurring slightly.

"Yeah." She sniffed.

His eyes started to close.

"Thanks, MJ..." He said.

"You know, you really ought to be more responsible." He heard her say.

"MJ, I said thank you. Please go." He muttered, as his head sunk into the pillow.

"Well, you're _not_ welcome."

"Fuck off....please." Peter mumbled.

"I'm going!"

"Did you....did you get in his pants? The guy?"

He didn't hear anything else from her, but the door of his room slamming.

He sighed and felt stupid, hot tears, trickle out of his eyes, down his face and unto his pillow.

Then he passed out again.

 


	2. Hawaiian Pizza

Peter had been sat on the kitchen table doing lab homework for four and a half hours now. He'd been too sick to go to school that Monday morning. In fact, he'd been too sick to do anything that weekend, and it didn't even matter anyway, because he was grounded.

Peter cringed as his mind flashed back to 4 am following the night of Liz's party. Aunt May had found him lying on the couch, clutching his stomach and groaning in pain. He remembered her driving him to the hospital, him having to get his stomach pumped, her yelling at him when they got back to the apartment, and him downing an entire flask of water before going to bed.

He was actually _glad_ that he couldn't make it to school on Monday, because the sheer embarrassment of having to tell people MJ drove him home would have been too much.

 _MJ,_ he thought.

He was confused about her being nice to him all of a sudden and caring to drive his drunk ass home. He also couldn't figure out why she just deposited him on the couch and slammed the door on the way out.

 _"Fuck..."_ Peter muttered under his breath. He was staring at the same Chem question for what seemed like forever.

He gritted his teeth and frowned, like he always did when he was stuck on a problem.  
If Ned had been here, he thought, he would know the answer. Peter had always been a whizz at math but Ned was the genius when it came to Chem.

Peter wanted to call Ned up and pick his brains, but Aunt May had sternly told him he couldn't have any visitors before she left for work earlier.

Maybe he should just call him to _check_ how he was doing? After all, he was so pissed that he didn't get invited to Liz's party, and that Peter had just gone without him.

Peter sighed and took another sip of his Gatorade, before attempting to FaceTime Ned.  
At first, there was no answer, but in true Ned-style, he answered the second call.

Ned's annoyed face popped up on the screen.

"What is it, Peter?" He said, obviously not any less pissed off from the last time he and Peter had spoken.

"Umm.." Peter stammered. He felt like he was talking to his principal instead of his best friend. Ned always had that affect on him whenever they were fighting.

"I just wanted to call you because...I miss you...I guess..." Peter continued, unsure of what to say now and regretting what he had just said so badly.

"Well that's very fucking hard to believe..." Ned replied. It seemed like he was playing video games, because Ned had balanced his phone on the table in front of him.

"Ned, look." Peter started. "It's not like my intention was to just go to the party without you..."

"But it _was_ ," Ned replied. "Wow, you really suck at lying. You didn't want me to go because you didn't want me to embarrass you in front of all your stupid senior friends. Who aren't even your friends anymore."

"What do you mean?"

Ned dropped his game console in frustration before picking up his phone again to move the camera right against his face.

"Everyone at school is talking about it," Ned said, putting a chip in his mouth and chewing it loudly to deliberately annoy Peter.

"Talking about _what?_ " Peter demanded. He knew that Ned knew that _he_ cared about his reputation a lot, and wanted to use this to stress him out.

"How you...nearly had sex...with Liz...and then chickened out..." Ned said, in between eating his chips.

"I didn't chicken out Ned!" Peter shouted, and then lowered his voice. "She was drunk, like _very_ drunk and I didn't wanna-"

"Yeah yeah, sure..." Ned smiled mockingly.

"Ned, it's not like you've gotten laid this year either-"

"I actually _have,_ first of all. And second of all, you haven't explained why you were such a dick. Why did you really call me?"

"So all the seniors think I'm a pussy..."Peter said, ignoring Ned's question.

His voice sounded way more sad than he had anticipated.

"They don't think you are, they _know_ you are..." Ned muttered, before setting his phone down on the table again.

Peter felt his blood boil as they both endured an awkward silence and Ned continued to play his game.

"I'm sorry..." Ned said, breaking the silence mid-game. "That was harsh. You're not a pussy...and you're a decent guy."

"Thanks..." Peter said, staring at the chem problem again and not Ned. "I'm sorry too, you know, for just being a dick in general."

Peter glanced at his phone screen and Ned looked down from his game to make eye contact with him.

They both laughed.

"Peter Parker, you loser." Ned sighed. "I heard there was lots of booze at the party. And that you passed out..."

"Yeah, I'm also a pussy when it comes to drinking as well..." Peter smiled, this time not caring how much Ned roasted him. At least they were talking, and at least he was still his best friend. "Can you shut up and help me with the chem homework now?"

"Sure," Ned said, reaching over to grab a piece of paper that looked like his own homework.

"Which question?"

"Ten..." Peter said.

Ned looked down at the piece of paper. "That's fucking easy Peter!"

They both laughed again.

After ten minutes of Ned explaining the answer to Peter, and Peter realizing how dumb he was, and Ned making fun of Peter for how dumb he was, Peter shut his textbook and sighed.

"Did they say anything else about me?" Peter asked, preparing himself for school tomorrow.

He knew that the hottest topics about Liz's party so far were him chickening out of sex, and there being lots of booze.

"Not really..." Ned started, pausing his game again. "Oh, someone said that MJ had to drive you home..."

"Shit..." Peter said, sipping his Gatorade again.  
"I totally forgot about that. I can't believe I let _MJ_ drive me home. I mean, she practically begged her way into that party so I can't be more of a loser than she is."

"Actually...she's not that much of a loser anymore..." Ned said, hesitantly.

Peter was confused. "What? How? Did she get laid or something?"

"Apparently..." Ned said. "That's basically all everyone was talking about all day. How MJ got laid. And she was loving all the attention- she sat at the _senior_ table today at lun-"

" _What?"_ Peter exclaimed, half finding this whole thing hilarious and half shocked that MJ was now popular. "She sat on the senior table? Was Liz there?"

"Yeah," Ned said, in a tone that sounded as if this should be obvious news to Peter.

"God..." Peter muttered, under his breath.

He knew that MJ had said she wanted to get into some guy's pants, but only thought she had said that to convince him to get her into the party.

He never thought she would actually _do_ it. And with who?

Peter had so many questions to ask but thought it would sound lowkey perverted to keep talking about MJ's sex life.

"Look Ned...I'll call you back." Peter said.

"Okay dude, maybe I'll see you later today." Ned replied.

"You won't. I'm grounded. May's super angry at me...I had to get my stomach pumped after the party,"

" _What?"_ Ned exclaimed, staring at his phone screen in amazement. "That sounds scary but kinda awesome."

"Bye Ned," Peter sighed, before ending the call.  
He dropped his phone on the kitchen table and hopped off his chair. He began to pace around like he always did when he was nervous or had a lot of information to digest.

Long story short, he was one of the biggest losers in school, MJ got _laid,_ and she was now hanging around the seniors.

 _Liz must think I'm such a waste of space,_ he thought.

Peter didn't think that she remembered the part when she was drunk and he told her she was drunk and she wasn't in the mental space to decide anything. She probably just remembered being semi-horny and him leaving.

Peter weighed up the consequences of both scenarios. If he'd taken advantage of her, he'd be the most popular kid in school, but he'd still feel pretty _shitty_ about the way it happened. He knew he'd done the right thing, but all he was left with was a poor high school reputation and a low chance that he'd ever be invited to a party of such prestige again.

He sat down at the kitchen table again and put a hand to his head. He felt a headache coming on. It was like he was trapped in a never-ending hangover and couldn't escape. He rummaged through the cupboards for some Advil, then downed two tablets with water.

He tried to call Liz - maybe he could explain the real reason why he left mysteriously and redeem himself - but she didn't answer.  
After calling three times, he decided that he was probably cancelled in her eyes, and didn't want to embarrass himself more by calling again.

In frustration, he tossed his phone to the other side of the table. It was at that exact moment that he heard a loud and obnoxious knock at the door.

 _"_ Just a second!" He shouted.

He knew it wouldn't be Aunt May because she would have let herself in.

Without much care, he opened the door, only to see MJ standing in front of him. With a box of pizza. In fact, she was mid-eating a slice.

"Hey dude," she said, nonchalant as ever. She smiled at him and then laughed at his perturbed reaction.

Peter looked her up and down. She had her hair in a messy bun - then again, when was it not messy - and she was wearing an oversized grey t-shirt with sweats.

How could _she_ be hanging out with the seniors, he thought.

Though, he wasn't surprised.

MJ never dressed like she gave a shit, and she wouldn't change now.

"What the fuck are you doing here?" Peter asked.

"I brought you leftover pizza," MJ said, lifting the box up to his nose. "It's Hawaiian, your favourite. You know how everyone hates Hawaiian pizza because it's controversial but you're the weirdo who happens to like it? I went out for pizza with Liz and Emily. This was leftover."

"You're my hero," Peter said angrily, before moving to shut the door in her face. Then he remembered that MJ was _popular_ now and it wouldn't hurt to spend like thirty minutes with her, especially when it meant that he would get free pizza.

" _You_ went out for pizza with Liz and Emily,"  
He said, opening the door wide again.

"Why do you say it like that?" MJ said, squinting at him.

"I don't care anyway...come in..." he said, remembering that this was the same girl who drove him home when he was completely wasted. He reminded himself to not tell her that he had to get his stomach pumped, and that he was grounded.

"Umm...I think you care," MJ said, dropping the pizza box on the kitchen table and stretching her arms. "Emily's a cheerleader, which I guess makes her important, and you basically salivate over Liz every time you see her."

"Shut up..." Peter said quietly, as they both sat opposite each other. He flung open the box and grabbed a piece of pizza. As he took the first bite, he realized how hungry he was, and how weird it was that MJ was now just watching him eat.

"Thank you for driving me home, MJ..." MJ said, imitating Peter's voice, and making it sound a lot more high-pitched than it actually was.

"I already thanked you like twice..." Peter said, chewing his pizza.

"Oh so you remember that?" MJ hissed.

Peter rolled his eyes. What was her problem?

MJ kicked off her converse and proceeded to re-adjust herself so that she was sitting cross legged on her chair. There was a silence as she yawned and Peter continued to eat his pizza.

"We're still going to see Drake and Travis right?" she said, her voice actually changing to sound normal.

"No." Peter said matter-of-factly. "We're not, because I'm grounded."

He realized now that he just told MJ the information he wished not to tell her before. And he also wondered why she had just assumed he was taking her and not someone else.

"You're grounded," MJ said, repeating his words back to him like they sounded stupid.

"Yes, MJ, I'm grounded." Peter snapped back, finishing his slice of pizza and proceeding to take another one. "I had to get my stomach pumped after the party. Feel free to be a bitch and make fun of me."

MJ stopped looking at him and started looking at her phone. He couldn't tell if she was annoyed at him calling her a bitch, or if she was just portraying her usual short attention span.

"I'll talk to May..." MJ said, texting and not even acknowledging him. "She'll let you go if she knows I'm taking you."

" _Why?"_

"Because I'm not an _idiot_ , like you are. And I'll make sure you stay out of trouble." MJ said, raising her voice and finally looking up from her phone.

"So what?" Peter said, raising his voice to match hers. "You're not my fucking _mom_ , MJ. You don't need to rescue me from parties and you don't need to babysit me."

"Whatever Peter..." MJ said, blowing some hair away from her face. "All I know is that I gave you tickets to Drake - and you're taking me."

"I wish you the very best of luck with that," Peter replied, finishing his second slice of pizza.

MJ seemed unwavered by Peter's comments, meanwhile every time he said something remotely mean, he felt extremely bad about it.

She put her phone in her pocket and proceeded to assess Peter's chem homework, which he had just left lying there.

"I'm guessing Ned helped you with this..." she said. "I know you kinda suck at chem."

"He did," Peter said, standing up from his seat. He thought he should offer MJ a drink, considering she was popular and shit. "Do you want soda?"

"Soda sounds good..." MJ said, actually making eye contact with him.

As Peter opened the fridge, he debated whether or not to ask MJ about what happened at the party.

"So what happened?" He said, handing MJ her soda and trying to sound like he didn't care.

"With what?" MJ asked.

"The guy..." Peter started, realizing that he was now talking to MJ about her sex life. "You said you'd get in his pants, and evidently you did."

"Yeah..." MJ said, opening her soda can and taking a sip. "Kinda weird that you're asking me about that."

"You seem to have no problem with telling everyone at school about it." Peter breathed.

"What do you even wanna _know?"_

"Like, who was it?"

"Who was what?"

"Who's _the guy_ , MJ." Peter said."Who did you have sex with?"

He was slightly frustrated.

"Wow, okay..." MJ laughed, looking at Peter like he'd just asked her to jump off a cliff. "I am...not obliged to tell you."

Peter shrugged.

"I'll just ask Ned and he'll tell me," He said.

"No he won't." MJ said, raising her voice again. "Because according to the entire school...it might have been Brian, or Tyler or James. No one really cares who fucked me, Peter. They just know that it was a senior, and I'm currently reaping the benefits."

There was another silence as MJ grabbed another slice of pizza and Peter looked at her. She didn't _seem_ different. She was still the same person. She was _still_ irritating and boring and obnoxious.

"So why are you hanging out with me?" Peter laughed, half-heartedly.

"Because you live close to me and I wanted to make sure you could still go to Drake..." MJ said.

Another silence.

"Did Liz say anything to you about me?" Peter asked, actually desperate for this information now.

MJ shook her head, her mouth stuffed with pizza.

"And when Andrew was with Liz, he didn't-"

"No!" MJ exclaimed. "Can you stop fucking interrogating me?"

"I'm only talking about what everyone else is talking about-"

"Well, I don't particularly _give_ a shit."

"MJ, calm down."

"Don't tell me to calm down," MJ scowled, standing up. "That's like the worst thing you can say to a girl who's PMS-ing."

Peter rolled his eyes and watched MJ make her way over to the couch. She sat down on it before grabbing the remote and switching on the TV. _The Big Bang Theory_ appeared on the screen and she made herself comfortable, lying back.

Peter couldn't decide what was worse, the fact that she had just invaded his private space and yelled at him, or the fact that she probably knew what Liz thought of him and wouldn't say anything.

He sighed, before throwing the empty pizza box away. He didn't really know what the other characteristics of a girl PMS-ing where, but knew that he probably shouldn't piss her off anymore. After all, she'd given him tickets to see his two favourite artists and even offered to get him out of being grounded.

He sat down beside her on the couch, after mentally making a decision not to push her buttons.

"How was debate club today?" He asked.

"Okay," she said quietly. Her eyes were still glued to the screen. "The proposition lost."

Peter sunk deeper into the couch and looked at her. She looked tired and a little bit disheveled. He thought how weird it was to picture MJ in her sweats sitting next to Emily and Liz at a pizza restaurant - they would have probably been all dressed up.

"And our Physics mid term is being moved to next week instead of the week after." MJ continued, still looking at the screen.

"Well that sucks," Peter replied.

"Yeah it does. I'm only taking Physics because Mr Davies is kinda hot."

Peter looked at MJ and MJ looked back at him.

"What?" She said. "He _is."_

 _"_ That's a little weird..." Peter laughed, thinking about Mr Davies. He was tall, had dark hair and apparently a six pack, so he understood why MJ would be attracted to him.

They sat watching _The Big Bang Theory_ for another twenty minutes before Peter heard the door unlock and Aunt May entered.

"Hi Peter..." she said, sounding stressed. She was carrying two bags of groceries which looked kinda heavy. "Oh...hi MJ."

Peter thought how weird it must be for her to see him and MJ watching TV together when they had never really been around each other previously.

MJ was only mentioned when Peter was complaining about her attitude in debate club.

"Hi May," MJ said, turning around to look at her and smiling. "Let me help you with those..."

MJ got up from the couch and took a bag of shopping from Aunt May, who looked grateful for the help.

Peter was slightly annoyed that she was now sucking up to his Aunt when he knew she was normally hostile towards him.

"I told Peter he couldn't have any visitors today-" May started.

"Oh that's my fault," MJ said, carrying the groceries over to the kitchen and proceeding to put them away. "I kinda just showed up here to bring Peter pizza. I didn't know he was grounded."

"Don't worry sweetie, it's fine" May said, smiling at her. "And, you really don't have to put away the groceries, Peter will do that."

"I guess I will..." Peter said, getting up to help MJ. He didn't think he'd ever heard Aunt May call anyone _sweetie_ in his entire life.

"Have you guys just been catching up about school?" May said.

"We were actually just talking about a concert I had tickets for us to go to...on Thursday..." MJ said.

"Really?" May replied, looking at Peter.

"Yeah..." MJ said, turning to face May. "Look, I know Peter is grounded but we've been really wanting to go to see Drake and Travis Scott for literally _ages_ now.  And I don't really have anyone else to go with."

May sighed. "Fine..." she said. "But I'm only saying yes because you're taking him."

"Thank you," MJ said, turning to Peter. "I promise I'll take care of him."

He felt embarrassed. Not only did _MJ_ have to babysit him, she had done exactly what she said she was going to do.

Peter just shook his head as May discussed more logistics with MJ, and made her way to her room.

"See Peter?" MJ said, putting the last of the groceries into the fridge. "You can thank me later."  
  
  
  
  


Peter had planned to meet MJ at the subway station so they could make their way to. Madison Square Garden.

She'd texted him a few hours earlier to say she'd be there at five, but lo and behold, she was late.

Peter stood outside the station and studied busy pedestrians walking past. He had headphones on and was listening to one of Travis' songs. He had mixed feelings about going today - he knew that the concert would be fun but was irritated at the idea that he would be going with _MJ._

The last few days at school could have been worse, he thought. He and Ned were still losers, and he rarely saw MJ, who was always walking around in a trio with Liz and Emily. She still dressed how she normally did and was still hostile to him at times. He hadn't spoken to Liz since the party, and never got any information from MJ about her new circle of friends. She often mentioned it once or twice, but was never really down for talking extensively about the seniors, or the _guy_ that she slept with at the party.

Minutes later, MJ appeared out of nowhere, approaching Peter and tapping his shoulder so that he snapped out of his reverie.

"Take your headphones off..." MJ signalled to him, as he couldn't hear anything.

MJ was wearing a denim skirt and tights, with a black tank top and a brown jacket. Her hair was actually _brushed_ and it fell down her shoulders.

"I wanted to wear merch from the tour but I couldn't find any online," MJ said.

"Same."Peter replied.

"You guys are going to a concert?" They both heard a distant voice from behind them, and turned around to see Ned standing there, holding a latte from Starbucks in one hand.

"Yeah..." MJ said to Ned. "Also, what are _you_ doing here?"

"Heading home from extra calculus..." Ned said.

 _"Extra calculus?"_ MJ said, stifling a laugh. "That's like the nerdiest thing I've ever heard."

"Peter obviously didn't tell me you guys had tickets to a concert," Ned said, staring at Peter, who wanted to put on his headphones again badly.

He had turned down watching a movie with Ned and lied that he had to study, with _MJ,_ which actually meant that he had hit rock bottom.

"Sorry dude." Peter said. "I mean it's Drake and Travis so I couldn't exactly pass it up..."

"Why are you guys hanging out together all of a sudden?" Ned said, looking at them both. "Is it because MJ's popular now?"

As Ned took another sip of his drink, MJ looked at Peter with a look that commanded him to say something at that moment.

"Why do I have to tell _you_ where I'm going all the time?" Peter asked.

"Oh my God, Peter, it's not about that..." Ned exclaimed. "It's about the fact that you _lied_ to me about where you were going. You don't need to pretend that you don't care what everyone else thinks about you, because you obviously do."

"I'm going to the _fucking_ concert Ned," Peter said, getting close to him. "She got me the tickets. I'm going, so piss off. If you were less annoying, then maybe I'd want to spend more time with you."

Peter couldn't believe he had actually said that.

"Wow, Peter..." Ned said, before turning to look at MJ. "Considering MJ wants to get in everyone's pants...I'm guessing you're next."

Ned pushed past Peter and made his way into the station. Peter's ears were ringing and he didn't know how to comprehend what Ned had just said.

"Asshole!" Peter shouted after him, completely angered, but Ned had disappeared into a crowd of people. Everyone around him turned and stared at him. An old lady even reminded him to watch his language.

He turned to look at MJ, who was looking down at the floor.

"Just ignore him," Peter said to her. "Don't know what's wrong with him."

"For what it's worth, fucking you is literally the last thing I would do on earth." MJ muttered.

Her voice sounded different though. Like she was trying to force humor into a very tense situation.

She looked up at the floor and at Peter. He couldn't tell that she was hurt in any way, but she just sort of had that blank expression on her face which signalled a mixture of 'I don't care' and 'stop talking'.

"But maybe he's right..." she continued, clutching her brown satchel and squinting to study a subway map that she'd now pulled from it. "Maybe I just wanna get in everyone's pants."

"You know that's not true..." Peter started, but MJ had already put the map back in her bag and was walking inside. Her fast pace meant that Peter struggled to keep up with her. He could just see her curly hair bouncing up and down behind her as she walked.

After they had bought their tickets, MJ stopped to sit on a bench and proceeded to tie her shoelaces that were now undone.

"When we get off at Penn Station, it's a three minute walk there..." MJ said, focusing on her laces. She seemed to be slightly angrier than she was when Ned made his comment.

Suddenly, her, phone rang. She glanced to look at who it was quickly then picked it up.

"Hey babe." she said, pressing the phone to her ear. "...I'm getting on the subway in a minute...yeah, with Peter...umm...not sure if I'll be able to make it...I kinda promised him I'd go..."

 _Babe?_ Peter thought.

Surely this was the _guy_ that she'd been with at the party. He was still curious as to who it was.

He didn't hang around MJ's new friends enough to get that information from them. He didn't know why MJ wouldn't tell him, and why it was such a big deal.

"Yeah, but if I can't be there then I can't be there..." MJ continued, glancing for a split second at Peter. "I'll see what I can do."  
MJ ended the call and shoved her phone back in her bag.

"Babe?" Peter repeated to her out loud as he had thought. "You and that senior guy are dating now?"

"You can call it dating if you want, Parker."MJ said, standing up. "Let's go."

There was a silence between them up until they had gotten into the subway. They sat next to each other and Peter was next to the window. He decided to put his headphones on and listen to some more Travis, because MJ was busy texting on a group chat.

Peter was confused. If MJ just had a one night stand with this guy, why was she calling him ' _babe'_ and why didn't she mention that they were dating. She had a real habit of leaving out important details.

They didn't speak until they were on their three minute walk to Madison Square Garden.

"You're not who I'm angry at, so..." MJ said to Peter, as they were about to cross the street.

"It sure feels like you're pissed, MJ." Peter replied.

"How can I be angry when I'm going to see Drake?" She smiled.

"Sounded to me like you had somewhere else to go..." Peter said. "And your _boyfriend_ wants you there..."

"He's not my boyfriend," MJ said, shaking her head.

"But you called him _babe."_ Peter laughed, as they saw a green light and proceeded to cross. "How can he not be your boyfriend?"

"Peter, have _you_ ever had a girlfriend before?" MJ asked, turning to look at him.

"Not...really-"

"Then you wouldn't really know about that stuff," MJ shrugged, patting Peter on the back.

What did she _mean_ by that? Peter never _had_ a proper girlfriend but that didn't mean he couldn't understand relationships.

Until they got there, he tried to change the subject, as this was a topic they obviously couldn't talk about together or agree on. The venue was literally packed with people already, and they took their seats which were quite near the front.

"Wow..." Peter said, looking all around him.  
"We've got a good view from here."

MJ took off her jacket and brought out her phone. She angled it towards herself to take a selfie and beckoned Peter to get close.

"You want me in it?" Peter asked, genuinely shocked.

"It's just for personal memories, dumbass." MJ snapped. "I'm not gonna post it anywhere. Can't have my friends seeing me with the nerd."

Peter really couldn't bring himself to be offended by her comments, so he got into the photo and smiled.

"I'm gonna try and enjoy the show and not Snapchat everything," she said, turning to him.

"Please don't..." Peter replied. "Concert Snapchat stories are the _worst._ And if you block my view of Travis, I'll fucking cry..."

She laughed out loud and he laughed too.

Just for a split second, it was cool that he had made, MJ, the newly found popular girl, laugh.

 


	3. Trig Graphs

Halfway through the concert, Peter's favorite song, Sicko Mode, was playing and the crowd was going _wild._ It was crazy how literally everyone knew all the lyrics and chanted them loudly, in time.

He turned to his left to see MJ, jumping up and down, and just letting loose. Her brown hair was just everywhere. He watched her arms as they flailed around and how strands of her hair was wet with sweat, sticking to her face...

He watched her for a little longer than he had anticipated.

"I'm having so much fun!" MJ screamed.

Peter smiled.

"Yeah, I can see that!" He shouted back.

When the song was over, Peter's stomach was starting to hurt from jumping around so much. He was so close to MJ that when she heard a vibration in her skirt pocket, he felt it too.  
He saw her look down at her phone, sigh then pick it up.

"Hello?" She screamed, over the music. "Hello? I can't fucking hear you!"

Peter wasn't sure whether to focus on Drake who was just a few meters away, or to be concerned about MJ.

"Peter!" MJ exclaimed. "I need to take this! I have to.....I'm going outside."

She turned around and began to squeeze her way through the crowd, towards the exit.

"MJ!" Peter screamed after her, just as a wave of people began to crowd surf Drake. "MJ!"

He was pushed forcefully backwards, just like a big wave had hit him, and fell over. He stood to his feet, then began forcing his way through the crowd as well. He saw her brown curly hair bobbing up and down then disappearing through the exit.

"Shit!" He shouted.

He finally made it to the exit. He looked left, then he looked right.

No sign of MJ.

He got out his phone and dialed her number.

"Pick up, pick up, pick up..." He muttered.

It went to voicemail.

_What the fuck is she doing?_ He thought.

Peter literally had no idea why she would just leave him like that. Or not at least send him a text to let him know she was okay.

He should have known MJ wouldn't think Peter cared that much. He made his way to the subway, walking quickly. He was tired, and lonely, and upset. And all the way there, he kept on dialing MJ's number. Just in case.

He stepped unto the platform. A 40 minute train, packed with people was getting ready to leave. He could just about make out MJ's brown jacket and curly hair.

"MJ!" Peter shouted. "Hey!"

He knew she couldn't hear him and that he wouldn't be able to bang on the train window because she was too far down the platform.

Then the train left. Just like that.

He was so angry, that he felt slightly sick. He didn't have time to mope about her anyway.   
He had school tomorrow, and so much catch up homework to do, and he still hadn't finished analyzing that stupid Chem research paper.

He was _so_ screwed.  
  


Peter was in the foulest mood for school the next morning. He had his earphones in his ears, as he climbed onto the subway.

And no, he was not listening to Travis Scott.   
Because it just reminded him of last night, which ultimately ended up being a disaster.

And MJ had still not picked up any of his calls or replied to any of his texts.

He looked behind him. He thought he saw a girl that looked like MJ. She had the same olive skin and thin arms. The girl took off her beanie to reveal her bright blonde hair . He turned away.

_Fuck, stop thinking about MJ._ He thought.

He turned up Juice Wrld on his phone till he couldn't hear any of the voices on the subway. Till he was lost in his own thoughts.

He got off the train and began his short walk to school, crossing the street carefully. As he walked into school, he kept thinking that he didn't want to see MJ. He didn't want to see Ned either - he just wanted to crawl into a ball and hibernate.

He sighed, as he started to fumble around with his locker combination. He still had Liz's stupid invitation pinned to his locker. He snatched it off and crumpled it in his fist, before grabbing his books for Physics and slamming the locker shut.

He unlocked his phone, and just as he did, he had received an iMessage. MJ.

_'Hey, I know you hate me but I can explain.'_

He took a quick breath in and out. He was aware he looked a bit weird, just standing in front of his locker, texting furiously.

_'That was just fucking rude MJ. Even for you.'_

He wasn't expecting a reply but then he remembered MJ mentioning during the concert that she didn't have class till just before lunch and she wouldn't be coming in for a while.

_'I know, I'm sorry. Okay?'_

Peter saw the message pop up on his phone, but he didn't even open it.

He put in his earphones again. He felt everyone looking at him. What were they thinking? They were probably imagining both him and Liz, half naked on the bed, then Peter having some sort of panic attack and running away. The thought of that night made him feel sick.

Peter usually liked Physics but today they were studying capacitors and circuits, and it honestly made him want to rip his eyes out.

He kept glancing down at his phone, wondering if he should just give in and reply to MJ, but every time he got so angry and ended up shoving his phone in his pocket again. He'd probably end up seeing her soon, anyway.

Then, he could really give her a piece of his mind.

Lab was hella awkward for him as well, Peter thought. Ned literally didn't say anything to him. He didn't dictate to Peter as he usually did and Peter felt so lost and confused throughout the whole class.

"Hey, Annabel...." he whispered, tapping the girl in front of him. "Can I copy your write up? I need to complete these practical notes."

"Sure..." she said, slipping her book to him. "Maybe you can actually finish something for once."

Peter was literally confused at first, till he realized that she was talking about him having sex with Liz.

"Oh, ha-ha." Peter muttered.

"I'm just kidding." Annabel said, flicking her hair out of her face.

_Who wears a Gucci belt and a supreme jumper to Physics?_ He thought.

She always looked so overdressed. He just liked how girls like MJ dressed. Girls who didn't give a shit.

_Fuck, stop thinking about MJ!_

After what seemed like forever, the bell rang for lunch and Ned purposely left Peter alone to clear up. Peter knew he deserved it for the way he treated Ned, so he just decided to be the bigger person.

At lunch, Peter slowly realized that he didn't have anyone to sit with. He could see Liz sitting on the senior table, her sleek black hair scraped up in a bun. She was wearing a yellow cashmere sweater and overalls. His eyes met with hers quickly, and he looked down immediately, concentrating on his tray of food.

There was no sign of MJ, who would usually be sitting there, looking a little bit lost and bored.

He usually sat with Ned, but there was no way that Ned was going to sit with him after what happened last night.

He spotted an empty table at the back of the cafeteria and sighed, before sitting down by himself.

It was so easy to go from popular to loser at Midtown High, Peter thought.

He bit into his sandwhich and scrolled through some of the videos he had taken last night. And the selfie MJ had taken and sent to him. She had her arm round his shoulder.

Wow, they both looked so happy, he thought.

Peter heard footsteps behind him and then someone set down their tray opposite him. He looked up to see MJ, with bags under her eyes.

Her skin was a little pale.

Peter ran his hands through his hair awkwardly. He felt like he had so many questions to ask but her but he didn't know where to start.

"I know you don't want to talk to me..." MJ sighed, before taking a bite into her sandwhich.

Peter kept looking down at the table. He just thought about his situation and how he had no _real_ friends.

"You're right....I don't..." He said, behind gritted teeth.

MJ reached over and put her hand on his. He flinched a little bit but he didn't exactly want her to let go.

"My dad was worried sick about me - I had to get home." MJ said, desperately.

"You and I both know that's bullshit, MJ." Peter whispered, leaning forwards. "So, tell me. What. The. Fuck. Is. Going. On."

She slipped her hand away from his quickly.

Peter was a little bit hurt at first, till he saw Andrew quickly slide in by MJ and put his arm around her.

He hated his stupid blonde- brown hair, and how it was always so slickly combed back. Or should he have said _sickly._

MJ smiled. Peter was so fucking irritated.

"Hey, babe..." Andrew said, kissing MJ on the cheek. He grabbed some biscuits on MJ's tray and began eating them, looking Peter up and down.

"I see you're hanging out with Pussy Parker."

"Shut up." Peter muttered.

"What?" Andrew laughed, "I can't quite hear you, Parker."

Peter looked to MJ who was now holding Andrew's hand on top of the table.

_Wait, she fucked Andrew?_

_What the fuck._

Peter suddenly remembered how Andrew had shoved him and walked into the shed with Liz. So, he had sex with MJ _and_ Liz? Something didn't add up.

"MJ, you've got some ketchup on your cheek." Andrew said, gently turning MJ's face towards him and wiping it off with a tissue.

MJ was giggling again and it really made Peter want to throw up.

"Why are you sitting with Peter, anyway?" He laughed, dusting his hands from the biscuits.

"He looked kind of lonely..." MJ said, not even looking up at Peter.

"MJ." Peter blurted out. "Are you serious? Are you fucking serious? Quit being a bitch for once-"

"Hey!" Andrew shouted. "Don't fucking talk to her like that. Apologize!"

Andrew had stood up now.

Peter looked him dead in the eyes, before standing up. He walked over to the trash can and threw all the food he had barely eaten in the bin, before dumping his tray on the side.

He felt his pace quickening as he pushed the cafeteria doors open. His heart was beating out his chest and he could feel sweat building up on his forehead.

He walked into the men's bathroom and locked himself in a stall, before putting both hands on the wall and laying his head on his arms.

_Calm down, Peter. Just calm down._

He bit his lip, and with tears burning in his eyes, he grabbed his phone from his pocket and began typing a message to Aunt May.

_'I fucking hate it here. I'm the biggest loser ever, May. Even Ned hates me. I don't like anyone here. They're all jerks and they don't even like science, and all they want to do is be popular-'_

He sighed before taking a deep breath, and deleting the message he had just composed.

He waited till his breath had slowed right down and till he didn't feel that ringing sensation between his ears.

He was okay. He could do this.

_'Are you okay?'_

A message had popped up on his phone. It wasn't MJ. And he was glad because he was sure that he never wanted to speak to her again. It was Maya. A senior. From Liz's party.

_'Yeah.'_ He texted back, confused.

' _I'm sorry about the way things went down with Liz. You can come talk to me anytime you want.'_

He wiped his eyes with his sleeve quickly before letting himself out of the stall. He splashed his face with water. His eyes were pink. Great. He was going to have to go into calculus, looking like his pet had just died.

After Calculus, in which he sat alone, Peter was shoving his books in his locker, when Maya walked up to him.

"Hey, Peter." She said, smiling.

"Hi, Maya." Peter said.

"Listen, this whole 'exile Peter' thing will be over in a few days. Just keep your head up."

"How would _you_ know?" Peter said. "Have you ever been exiled?"

"I mean, I literally hit Liz in the head with my lacrosse stick in Freshman year and I was shunned for about three weeks..."

Peter laughed.

"Come over to mine tonight." Maya said. "I was going to ask you anyway because Calculus is really kicking my ass this year. And I got my subject test back and it was only a 770 yet again, so I can forget about college."

_Woah, standards are really high here,_ Peter thought.

"Yeah, sure, why not?" Peter said, closing his locker. "I've got a shit ton of homework to do."

"Cool - see you later." Maya said before turning and walking away.

Her hair looked blonder than when he saw her in the pool and she kind of looked like tinker bell in her green turtle neck dress, Peter thought.

He was so ready to forget about MJ.

Anything, anything he could possibly do to forget about how she hurt him would be great.  
  


When Peter arrived at Maya's house, it was already quite late but it took a lot of sucking up to May for her to let him out anywhere.

"So what do you struggle with?" Peter asked, flipping through Maya's textbook.

They were sat on her massive wooden dining table. And he felt kind of glad that her parents weren't home. Less people to look awkward in front of.

"Yeah, I got an 85 on my last test but I need to be getting at least a 95. It's always these stupid trig graphs..."

Peter looked at the test that was graded. He couldn't remember the last time he scored below a 98 in math.

"Here look, you've gotta think about each transformation individually, you can't just...draw random shit..."

Maya laughed. Peter laughed as well, before putting a pen in his mouth.

"Try this one..." he mumbled, handing Maya a piece of paper.

She stared at him for a bit.

"Sorry.." she laughed. "I get why Liz was into you. You've kind of got that really hot, sexy teacher vibe about you."

Peter blushed.

He continued to watch Maya draw the wrong graphs for what seemed like forever, and kept redrawing them for her till she started to get it right on her own.

Then they both spent hours doing some homework. Peter finished first, of course. He kind of ended up helping Maya with hers as well.

"You're good to go now." Peter said. "Anything else?"

"That's enough math for me today, thanks." She sighed. "Are you hungry? Or thirsty? I've got beer - it's actually really good."

"That doesn't sound too bad, actually..." Peter said.

She led him to the fridge. There was so much alcohol in there, Peter could barely believe his eyes.

"This is my favourite." Maya said, grabbing two cans out of the fridge.

They both sat down on the couch, drinking and gossiping.

"So, are you really a virgin, Peter?" Maya asked.

"Yeah..." Peter replied. He wasn't as embarrassed as he thought he would be. "You?" Peter asked.

"I've had sex like four times but like...not with anyone in Midtown high. The boys there are either nerds, or douches. But, you're like, niether. You know what I mean?"

Peter just smiled and took the compliment. He was feeling a bit tipsy now. He definitely couldn't get _too_ drunk or he was sure that Aunt May would be pissed.

All of a sudden, he couldn't help wondering what having sex with her would be like. He really had no feelings for her, but they were both really giggly and feeling quite reckless right now.

Maya began playing some music from her phone through the speakers in her house.

"I saw on your Snapchat story that you went to see Drake and Travis with MJ. It looked pretty dope." Maya said, handing Peter a glass of something. He didn't question what it was, but drank it all in a few seconds.

Peter lay down on the couch. He was kind of exhausted.

"Yeah, it _was_ dope. I touched Travis' hand." Peter replied.

"Really?" Maya exclaimed, sitting cross legged by the couch, sipping her own drink. "I'm jealous."

She tossed her blonde hair to the side again. Peter found it weird seeing girls who dressed up so much at school, just wearing shorts and a T-shirt at home.

He imagined that MJ would probably wear the same thing.

"So you're into MJ, now?" Maya asked, finishing what was in her glass.

Peter's heart skipped a beat because MJ was literally just on his mind.

"She's dating Andrew - and I'm not into her anyway." Peter said.

"Really? You seem to spend a lot of time together-"

"She's kind of the only one who is talking to me since everybody is ignoring me at school. Apart from you, of course."

Maya nodded, kneeling and shuffling closer to Peter.

"I saw you storm out of the cafeteria today." She said.

Peter started to feel all the feelings from earlier coming back.

"Yeah, MJ was kind of a bitch today. And yesterday. But that's an even longer story..." he sighed. "I guess I kind of hate her."

_Anything. Anything he could possibly do to forget about how she hurt him would be great._

He leaned in to kiss Maya.

And the worst thing was that when he closed his eyes, he saw MJ at the concert. Dancing, jumping up and down with her curly hair bouncing everywhere and sweat glistening on her olive skin.

Maya took off the tank top she was wearing, before kissing him back. Peter wasn't really concentrating.

It felt like five hundred million thoughts were trying to be processed in his brain all at once. He wasn't sure if he was drunk, or sad, or both.

Maya got on top of Peter. He felt the same sort of numbness like when he was with Liz. Like none of this was actually happening. He was sure his cheeks were bright red.

"Peter, relax." Maya whispered, unbuttoning his shirt. She traced his abs with her fingers, before kissing them softly, two or three times. Again, Peter wasn't really counting or concentrating.

He suddenly started to think of how naked he must have been in front of MJ, that night of the party. How she had rubbed his bare back as he threw up.

Maya leant down and kissed his neck slowly, several times. He was pretty sure she had given him a hickey and that he already had a boner.

His hands were shaking. He didn't know why. He thought he would be better at this.

"I'm sorry." He kept saying, in between making out with Maya.

Maya stood up now. She began undoing her bra slowly then slipping off her underwear. She was fully naked and it wasn't that Peter had expected more from her - her body was beautiful - he just wasn't fazed.

He felt as though he was locked in this mental state.

His mind kept replaying the same scenarios from last night, over and over again.

Peter sat up to take his boxers off. Tears were frozen in his eyes and he didn't know why. Maybe he really was a pussy. Just like Andrew kept reiterating.

Maya looked down at Peter, like she was investigating his body.

"Oh my God, I hope I don't die..." she laughed, holding a condom in her hand.

_Where did she even get that?_

He felt like a deer caught up in the headlights. He couldn't even register the joke, till he basically clocked that maybe she was implying he had a huge dick.

Peter reached his hand out to Maya. She was still giggling but he was silent and serious, carefully taking the condom from her hands.

He would usually be riddled with delight that a girl was impressed with him. He had always imagined passionately stripping Liz's clothes off and slipping his condom on in two seconds, but it was taking Peter a lot longer than two seconds. Right now, all he just wanted to get this over with.

He walked up to Maya and crashed his lips against hers before lifting her up unto him. Her legs were straddled round his waist. She felt light in his arms, he thought. Partly because he _was_ quite strong and partly because he was a little bit dizzy.

She gasped softly as her back hit the wall of the living room. Her hands were already in his hair she began to moan against his lips. Her blonde hair cascaded down her face, past her shoulders, and she would occasionally lift one hand off Peter's face and push it away.

And he _hated_ himself for it, but her moans kind of reminded him of how MJ hummed along to the music when she didn't know the words.

_'For what it's worth, fucking you is literally the last thing I would do in earth.'_

He forgot all about Maya as he slid into her. Maya let out a loud groan this time, breaking away from Peter's lips and laying the back of her head against the wall.

He closed his eyes and imagined it was MJ moaning. It was MJ saying 'Peter' over and over again. It was MJ grabbing his curls in her fists and MJ's mousey hair he could feel on his chest. It was MJ's lips he felt on his neck. It was MJ's hips moving rhythmically to his own timing.

He was moving faster and faster. The faster he went, the more she moaned, the more he thought of MJ humming at that concert.

And then he orgasmed. And with the release, he kind of felt like bursting into tears at the same time. He let Maya down slowly. He didn't realize just how long they had been doing that for, until he realized that his hips were now aching.

He was so out of breath that he had to lean against the wall for a few seconds.

"Holy, fuck, Peter." Maya said, her blue eyes glistening. "That was your first time? You're kidding me."

Peter was still trying to catch his breath.

_Yes, it was my first time,_ he thought. But he didn't say it. He had pictured his 'first time' so differently and he certainly had never pictured it with her.

He glanced over at Maya, who looked like she was ready for round two.

"I've gotta go." He said, abruptly. "It's late..."

Maya walked up to him and kissed him once more.

"Okay...but you're _really_ good at that." She said, once she had broken away from him.

He kept thinking about how he had just lost his virginity but how it was _kind_ of him just jerking off to the thought of MJ naked and wet.

_What. The Fuck._ He thought.

He got himself cleaned up, he disposed of the dirty condom, and put his clothes back on before finally pulling his Nike's back onto his feet.

Maya sat next to him on the couch as he was doing up his shoelaces.

She was on her phone whilst Peter was silent, still trying to process what just happened.

"Oh my God...." Maya gasped. "There's so much beef between Andrew and Flash on Instagram."

"About what?" Peter asked, still out of it.

"MJ."

He paused.

"What about MJ?" He asked, as casually as he could.

Maya showed him the phone screen. Flash had posted a photo on his 'private Instagram' of what looked like MJ on the night of Liz's party.

_What kind of private Instagram had 3000 followers?_ Peter thought.

"There's like three hundred comments..." Maya giggled, scrolling through. "Everybody's basically calling MJ a slut, including Flash. But Andrew and a few seniors are defending her."

Peter unlocked his phone and took a look at the photo for himself. MJ had mascara running down her face, and her dress was torn at the bottom. Just like he'd remembered.

Peter felt sick.

He stood up suddenly and started packing his books into his bag.

"Thanks, Maya....for the hospitality." He muttered awkwardly, running a hand through his hair.

"You're welcome...." she said.

He forced a smile at her quickly then made his way to the door.

"Peter?" Maya asked quickly. "I mean like, do you want me to tell the seniors what happened? You were really good at that.....like....fucking amazing. Maybe it would help lift the curse?"

Peter's lips parted. He thought he would feel better about this whole thing....after having sex with her, but he didn't. Holy shit, he just fucked Maya Gardner.

_She's loaded, she's a senior, she's way out of your league._

He thought that was something Ned might say.

"I really don't give a shit what they think about me." Peter said firmly, before slipping out the door and shutting the door behind him.  
  
  


Peter thought he had called MJ about fifty five times now. And sent her about 500 messages.

Still, no reply. No answer. He was really starting to hate it when she would just go MIA like that.

He kept pacing and pacing around the block, hoping she would just at least tell him that she was at home. He stopped by in front of Mr Delmar's shop. It was closed but it somehow felt like somewhere he could be safe.

He dialed MJ's number yet again. It went to voicemail. And just when Peter felt like giving up, MJ had sent him a text.

_'I'm at home, Parker'_

Peter had never been to MJ's house before. He still had his book bag draped around his shoulder. Maya had already sent him a couple of messages but he hadn't replied. He just kept on walking and walking, till he got to MJ's house.

He stepped up to the door and rang the doorbell.

Peter was taken aback when MJ's Dad opened the door. He was a tall, dark, slim man.

"Can I help you?" He asked, looking Peter up and down.

"Um...Mr Jones....MJ told me she was home.   
We were hoping we could go over some Chem research papers together. Apparently, she's just as confused as I am." Peter said.

He surprised himself at how easily the lie came out.

"Sure, come in." Mr Jones replied, smiling.

He let Peter in. This was a really huge house.

MJ had never really talked about her place. It wasn't just huge, it was modern and chic. The bright red leather chairs, white fluffy carpets, glass tables, mahogany wood....he was getting distracted.

"Just head on upstairs, Peter. I think she's doing homework in the study. First door on your left." He said.

He wondered where MJ's mom was.

Peter climbed up the stairs. He turned left and then knocked on the door.

"MJ, it's Peter." He said.

"Come in."

Her voice was somehow subdued. He stepped in, and closed the door behind him.

The walls where white and MJ had sprawled her books on the massive glass table. She was curled up on a brown leather chair, pen in her mouth, tapping on her notebook with her pink nails.

Her hair was scraped back in a low ponytail for once.

"Can I sit?" Peter asked, gesturing to the chair next to her.

MJ nodded.

She had an iced pink lemonade by her side and sipped it readily.

Wow, how did she manage to pull off that grungy look at school, coming from a house like this, he thought.

Peter was about to open his mouth but MJ was already talking.

"I'm sorry about Andrew today and the way I was acting and what not." She sighed.

Peter just nodded.

"But no offense." Peter said. "Why do you even like him? He's such a douche-"

"What's that on your neck?" MJ asked, interrupting him.

Peter's fingers immediately reached up to touch the hickey on the right side of his neck.

"It's nothing." He mumbled. "Anyway-"

"It's a hickey!" MJ laughed, standing up and walking towards him to examine him, irritatingly running her fingers on top of it. "Who gave it to you?"

"MJ, it really doesn't matter-"

"Oh my God. You got laid, didn't you?" She exclaimed. "Peter, you fucked someone?"

"What....no." Peter lied, blushing now.

MJ burst out laughing. Peter was so annoyed and so embarrassed.

"I love how you're trying to make this about me." He sighed, shaking his head.

"So you _did_ get laid. I knew it."

Peter wanted to scream at her. He wanted to say that he just did it to forget about MJ and that it only made him think of her more.

But honestly, she would think he was _so_ stupid.

"Yeah, okay?" Peter snapped. "Are you happy now? I'll let you laugh now for a few minutes, since you find it so funny."

MJ didn't say anything. There was an awkward silence for what felt like forever as she took another sip of a drink.

"I know you came here to tell me not to worry about everything that was happening online. But I actually don't care. So if that's what you're here to do, I don't need your pity." She said, matter-of-factly.

Peter felt so strange. Usually, when girls pissed him off like this, he was done. He wouldn't waste his time with them any longer. But there was something about her that he was just curious about.

He still had so many questions. What happened the night of Liz's party? Why was Flash calling her a slut, online? But he could tell MJ didn't want to talk about any of that.

Peter swallowed, before rubbing the side of his temple with his fingers. He always did that when he was stressed.

"I know that you don't care about anything or anyone...but I do. I'm sorry that makes you feel weird or whatever..." Peter said.

"You don't even know me, Peter!" MJ shouted, raising her voice a little. "You know, you act like you don't care about popularity, even though I'm pretty sure you just had sex with a girl you don't even like...just to make yourself more relevant-"

"God, MJ, why do you even fucking care-"

"Well, why do _you_ fucking care about me and Andrew?" MJ screamed.

Peter stood up.

"I shouldn't have come. I just....I just made everything worse." He sighed.

MJ stood up and stared to pack up her books.

Peter saw that she had begun to cry. He saw the tears running down her cheeks and unto her books.

He'd never ever seen her that vulnerable before.

"If there's something you're not telling me..." he said, as his voice trailed off.

She shook her head, before sniffing, still not looking up.

He wrapped his arms around her and hugged her for a few seconds. She stood still in his arms.

"I know you're trying to help, Peter...but please just leave." she said.

MJ broke free of his hold. Peter sighed, before walking up to the door.

"I'll see you at school tomorrow." He said.

She didn't even look up at him. And with that, he left.

He was sad when MJ's Dad asked if everything was okay. He was sad walking down the block, back to his apartment. He was sad and silent when May made him dinner and asked him about his day. He was sad when he lied to her about it. He was sad when he finally got into bed.

He closed his eyes and all he could picture was her face as she was crying.

He didn't know _what_ he was feeling or _why_ but he knew that he'd never felt that way before.

 


	4. Trespassing

"Should all people be vegetarians?" 

Tyler stood at the front of the classroom, reading out a debate topic from his laptop screen. He was president, and probably the most passionate member. Apart from going to parties and dating girls, Tyler had something else to his name - running the debate club and running it pretty well.

Peter sat at one of the desks towards the back, watching as everyone on the team lead a discussion.

He thought about all the relationships he still had in his life and the people that cared about him. Ned was out of the picture. Maya had been sending him texts for the past three days, begging for him to come to her house to spend more time with her. MJ had been 'sick' and hadn't shown up to school for the past week; Peter had sent her several messages and called her several times but she hadn't answered. He couldn't quite work out why she was so upset that night at her house, why she felt the need to be absent all the time, and why she wouldn't talk to him.

At least something was different about the way people treated him now. He _actually_ wasn't invisible anymore. He thought how ridiculous it was that the only way to get people's attention these days was by going around sleeping with people.

Maybe Ned was right. Maybe Peter _did_ really only care about his reputation. After all, he couldn't really figure out what got into him that night he had sex with Maya. Maybe he was just tired of never having an experience everyone else was talking about. Maybe he just wanted to know what it was like. Either way, he still couldn't believe that he was now no longer a virgin.

"Peter?" Tyler narrowed his eyes at him from the front of the classroom. "What do you think?"

"Um..." Peter stammered snapping out of his thoughts once again. "My aunt was vegetarian for a whole year and concluded that she kind of hated the whole experience so..."

Tyler nodded at Peter and continued to write stuff down on his laptop. Peter examined him and wondered how a person could be so different from debate club and basically any other social setting. He was wearing a checkered shirt and slacks, which made him look like a teacher.

"We've got a competition at Boston this weekend..." Tyler continued, folding his arms and leaning against the front desk in true teacher style. "We're gonna be the opposition on the topic which isn't actually that hard because you know...free will and all that shit..."

A few people started to laugh but Peter didn't find anything Tyler was saying particularly funny. In fact, all he could think about was how much he wanted to talk to MJ.

"I've divided the team into pairs, so you guys can write your speeches. The best three will speak at the competition. I need you guys to actually make this good because Westriver High are our biggest rivals and they're gonna be against us."

Peter never really enjoyed debate meets because of how competitive the atmosphere always got. He knew that this trip might just be another one from hell.

"Peter...you're with MJ, so I guess you need to sort out what you're doing outside of class..." Tyler said, beginning to read out the list of pairs.

_What?_ Peter thought.

Why had Tyler put him with MJ? He couldn't decide if he was happy to have an excuse to talk to her and find out what the hell was going on with her, or if he was anxious that he had to write a speech with her and present it to the entire debate team.

As Tyler finished reading out the list of names, the door opened and Flash walked in, followed by Maya. Peter was surprised and disappointed at the same time to see her. He could also smell her perfume strongly on her as she wrapped her arms around him, kissed him quickly on the cheek and took her seat on the desk right beside him.

"Woah, what are _you_ guys doing here?" a girl on the team said.

Flash was chewing gum and had already propped his legs up on the desk in front of him, scrolling through his phone and showing no sign of enthusiasm whatsoever.

"We're here because we need to do more high school activities..." Flash said, nodding at Maya. "It was either this or mad science, and I do _not_ wanna be around those fuckers. Also, Tyler said we could join."

"I'm actually kinda excited to join..." Maya added looking at Peter with her bright blue eyes.

She was pretty, but he kind of just wanted her to leave him alone.

"And I get to spend more time with Peter so..."

Peter sighed heavily, trying not to show that he was incredibly irritated by her. He was now _glad_ that he'd been paired with MJ and not forced to spend the next weekend kissing Maya's ass to maintain his reputation.

As the rest of the classroom dispersed into various conversations, Maya grabbed Peter's hand from her desk.

"Peter, is everything okay with you?" She said, playing with his fingers.

He sighed again, realizing that his facial expression was blank, and that all he wanted to do was go home.

"I'm fine," he said, finally looking at her. "I'm just...I have to work on my speech with MJ so I can't come over..."

Maya flipped her blonde hair over her shoulder. "So you mean you can't come over _again?_ This time, because of MJ. You're actually standing me up for MJ?"

"I'm not standing you up Maya, I have to work on the speech." Peter snapped back, failing to hide his annoyance any longer.

"Okay, I get it..." Maya said, releasing her hand from his. "You're kinda hot when you get mad in a way. I'll let it go this time."

Peter wanted to roll his eyes so bad.

He stared at the clock in front of him. Lunch break had already begun, which meant that he was going to have to sit with Maya and the rest of the seniors. He'd been doing that every day for the past week but never encountered MJ, who was on a hiatus from school. It was the same old conversation every time about who's going to what party and who's screwing who.

He always just sat next to Maya and listened to her occasionally tune in and out. _Liz_ actually started talking to him too, but Peter normally wasn't really into it. After all, she'd kinda treated him like trash before the whole Maya thing.

On the senior table today, however, there was a slightly different conversation. Flash had sat down with them today and was spouting bullshit about his private Instagram account, and the fight he had with Andrew, who thankfully was not there this time.

"Guys, Andrew is literally in denial..." Flash said, biting into an apple. "He leaves all these retarded comments on my page. He's psychotic."

"Why's he psychotic?" Liz said, who was sat next to him.

She didn't have a lunch tray in front of her but had a salad that she'd brought in from home instead. Peter previously heard her mention that school food was kinda shit and she didn't want to put any of that garbage into her body.

He pictured MJ in his head, who would grab a plate of chips and a burger without caring.

"He's defending MJ when everyone knows that she's a slut," Flash said, looking around the table for everyone's approval. Peter didn't make eye contact with him.

"How's she a slut though?" Liz said, sipping her Fiji water. "She's only had sex like once?"

"I heard she's been with five other guys," Emily said.

"Really?" Brian, the quarterback, asked.

"Yeah." Emily replied. "She's really got around."

Peter was really confused. These were the same group of people who acted like they were all friends, but constantly talked behind each other's backs and spread rumours.

He also couldn't believe the kind of things they were saying about MJ. Peter knew for a fact that she wasn't a slut - not that anyone should be going around calling people sluts anyway.

He wanted to say something to Flash, but didn't want to start any unnecessary drama.

"Well MJ's my friend so I don't wanna say anything..." Liz said.

"Really?" Brian smirked. "Where do you know her from?"

"My Dad and her Dad are good friends." Liz replied, staring into Brian's soul, before she took a big bite of her salad.

Brian just bit his lip, before unlocking his phone again.

Peter was really frustrated now. _How_ could she sit there and say she was MJ's friend, when she sat there and listened to other people say shit about her?

He _had_ to say something.

"Are you really her friend though, Liz?" Peter said, frowning.

Liz looked at him, confused. She was sat at the other side of the table and looked genuinely shocked that he was even speaking to her.

"I _am_ her friend, Peter..." Liz said, in a tone that was patronizing as hell. "I don't even know why you care so much, anyway."

Maya shifted uncomfortably next to him. Peter knew that the conversation made her unsettled. She hated when he brought MJ up.

"If you're her friend, why aren't you defending her?" Peter continued.

"I said I didn't want to say anything." Liz retorted, her tone more angered now.

"It's not the same as defending her though," he replied.

"Chill the fuck out Peter," Flash said, cutting into the conversation. "It doesn't matter _who's_ her friend. She's a slut. Facts."

Liz sighed and sipped more of her Fiji water.

Peter wanted to scream in her face. She was bold enough to say she was MJ's friend, but too much of a coward to defend her.

"Another fact is that you're a certified asshole, Flash, but I guess we probably won't agree on that either..." Peter said, looking at him and biting into his sandwich.

His heart was being fast now. He wanted to take back what he said immediately he said it, but was relieved when half of the table started laughing, including Liz.

"Alright guys, laugh at me all you want..." Flash said. "I know you'll all still be following my page."

"Shouldn't you take down the photos of MJ?" Emily said. "If one of the teachers finds out, we'll all be in deep shit."

"Well _I_ didn't take them, Tyler did..." Flash said, before grabbing his tray and standing up.   
"I'll see you guys tomorrow..."

_Tyler?_ Peter thought. He wondered why the hell Tyler was taking pictures of MJ at the party, and why they got around to Flash.

When classes were over, Maya stopped Peter again before he was about to head home.

"Peter..." she said, grabbing his arm. "Can you just come over here and talk to me, instead of running away again?"

Peter looked at her. She was so _hot._ At least that's what he would have thought a month ago.

He wondered why he wasn't thankful that she hung around him, and actually enjoyed his company. Her body made him want to rip her clothes off. But he didn't really want _her._

Maya put her arms around his neck.

"What was up today with you and Flash?" She said, lowering her voice "He can be a dick and everything but I just don't know why you were so upset about the whole MJ thing. I thought you hated her."

"I guess I don't really hate her..." Peter said. "I mean, I have to get over it...you know...before the debate comp."

"Can you at least make out with me before you go?" Maya said, smiling at him.

Without thinking, Peter leant in to kiss her. She tasted like mint, and the blueberry lip balm she was wearing. She kissed him back, and Peter couldn't help thinking that they were in plain view of other people. In that moment, he wanted to push her back against the wall and do everything that they did that night all over again.

But all he could think about was MJ, and how badly he wanted to talk to her.

_You're only with her for sex, Peter._

He broke away from the kiss, his heart rate starting to rise again.

"Maya...I can't..." he started. "I can't keep doing this."

"Doing what?" Maya said, now removing her hands from his neck.

"What we did was nice and everything, but I can't do this anymore. Like all this PDA, and acting like we're boyfriend and girlfriend." Peter said.

He didn't know why his heart was beating even faster now.

Maya looked at him, completely stricken with disappointment.

"Are you kidding me?" She said, quietly. "You literally _just_ kissed me."

"I have to go." Peter replied. "I'm sorry."

"Are you saying this because of MJ?" Maya said angrily.

Peter couldn't think of anything else to say.  
Maya rolled her eyes before pushing past him and walking away.

And Peter didn't particularly care.  
  
  
  
  


The bus ride to Boston had made Peter want to projectile vomit. He never dealt well with travel sickness, and this trip wasn't any different. He had no one to sit next to, because Maya was sitting next to Flash, and he felt like no one else on the debate team was worthy of his time.

Except MJ, of course. They'd glanced at each other before she got on the bus, but she had just sat down next to another girl, and not acknowledged Peter any further.

He was really worried about the speech they had to do together now. They hadn't even started working on it. Peter had shown up at MJ's house twice, but she wasn't there. Not to mention her ignoring all his texts and calls.

He just wanted to _talk,_ to her, but felt like he could never get her alone. They were stopping off at a hotel later that evening, and he thought about going to her room, but Mrs Gale, who was supervising the trip, had warned everyone over and over again that they were not allowed to be in each other's rooms.

Peter decided to text her again to see if she would reply.

_'We really need to work on the speech later'_ \- he texted.

She was sitting behind him on the bus, and he didn't want to look over to check if she was on her phone.

But to his surprise, she replied almost instantly.

_'Yeah, we do'_

Peter sighed in relief. He wanted to text back so many things. Like to ask if she was feeling better, or how the hell she was coping with the way people talked about her online, and tell her that he cared about her and didn't know why she was ignoring him.

But he didn't ask her any of those things.

_'I'm sure we'll find some time tomorrow'_ \-   
he texted.

_'Sounds good'_ \- she replied.

Peter's brain was doing backflips. Was she being sarcastic, or did she genuinely want to meet up with him to get this thing finished? He knew he had to stop overthinking a two-worded text.

By the time they had finally stopped over at the hotel, it was dark, and Peter truly felt like he wanted to vomit. May had packed him some snacks but the last thing he wanted to do was eat anything.

He didn't get a chance to talk to MJ before they all had to go to their rooms. He lay on his bed, staring at the ceiling and trying to get over how sick he was feeling.

The hotel luckily had WiFi, so he FaceTimed May before going to bed. He was about to drift off to sleep when someone knocked on his hotel door quietly.

In just his boxers, he went to answer it - his whole soul wanted it to be MJ.

But it wasn't. It was Tyler, and he was all dressed up as if he was going out.

"Peter..." Tyler whispered. "We're all sneaking out to go clubbing. Get your clothes on and let's go."

"What?" Peter replied, squinting from the contrast between the darkness of his room and the bright light in the corridor.

"Everyone's going clubbing, so let's go. Be very quiet though, and don't blow it for everyone else. Meet us round the back."

Peter sighed heavily. The last thing he wanted to do right now was go clubbing. He'd been up late at night recently studying for his Physics mid-term, which was in a couple days, and his bed was practically calling him.

But Peter didn't want to be the party pooper, so he threw on a shirt and jeans and snuck out of the hotel.

Everyone on the team had congregated at the back entrance and Tyler was dictating stuff to them. He spotted MJ who was wearing black leggings and an oversized Adidas hoodie. She didn't look like she wanted to go anywhere either.

"Everyone, meet back here at 4am." Tyler said, quietly. They're a couple of good clubs round there and I've got my fake ID so I guess this is worth a try. Don't get too wasted though, so Gale doesn't suspect anything. And be _quiet_ on the way back in. If you Juniors get us in trouble, you'll all be paying for it on Monday."

As everyone started to disappear into different directions, Peter finally went over to MJ.

"Are _you_ going clubbing?" He said, stopping her in her tracks.

"Does it _look_ like I'm going clubbing?" She replied, looking at him. Her hair was blowing in the wind and she had her hands in the pocket of her hoodie.

"No, it doesn't." Peter said, looking at her intently. "So if you don't mind, we could go to that twenty-four hour pancake place and write our fucking speech."

"The one we have to finish by tomorrow that has to be two thousand words long?" MJ laughed.

"Yeah, that one..." Peter laughed too.

"It might help to do that...we _could_ go there..." MJ said sarcastically.

Peter looked up the pancake place on Google Maps and the next eighteen minutes consisted of Peter trying to navigate their way there, and MJ telling Peter how much he sucked at navigation, and Peter taking the wrong turn, and MJ grabbing his phone and leading the way instead.

"At last..." MJ said, as they both entered, relieved by the warmth inside. It smelt so good and Peter realized again how lightheaded he was and how he should have probably just eaten May's snacks.

They both went to the counter to order their pancakes, and then sat down in a corner that had two large armchairs facing each other with a table in between. Peter pulled out his laptop out of his bag and sighed. It was now one o'clock in the morning, and he could tell that they were both not going to get any sleep tonight.

"Debate club _sucks..._ " MJ said, sinking into her chair.

"It really does, doesn't it?" Peter replied, yawning. "There's no way I'm doing it senior year."

MJ got out her own laptop, coughed, and set it down on the table. Peter looked at her - she seemed less tired and disheveled today but still didn't look completely herself.

"Peter, I feel like I'm always gonna be apologizing to you but I'm sorry again..." she said. "I shouldn't have ignored you..."

Her voice trailed off.

_What happened to you, MJ?_ He thought.

"It's okay..." Peter said, just relieved that she was was no longer ignoring him. "Are you gonna be in school on Monday?"

"Well, I will be if I want an A in Physics..." MJ smiled. "I know it's hard to believe that I was actually sick, but I was."

"Because you're never sick..." Peter said. "I literally can't remember the last time you missed class."

"It was...a mixture between me nearly getting pneumonia and me being bed ridden with period cramps." MJ replied. "Also, I can basically forget that A in Physics because I literally haven't studied."

"I would try and make you feel better about it, but I'd be lying if I said _I_ hadn't studied..." Peter said.

"Shut up," she laughed. "You _know_ you're gonna get a ninety-five. And then I'll show you my test paper and I'll have a sixty five. And you'll say, 'well it's not _that_ bad'..."

Peter laughed. He couldn't fully understand why everyone constantly roasted him for being so high-achieving, but he wasn't complaining.

MJ moved over to his armchair and they got started on the speech, taking it in turns to write parts of it down and make other notes. Their pancakes arrived and they continued to work and eat at the same time.

"That's like a thousand and two hundred words..." MJ sighed, licking Nutella off her fingers. "That's enough."

"That's nowhere near..." Peter said, staring at the screen.

"I feel like we should take a break and talk about _your_ sex life, considering you were so intent on hearing about mine..." MJ said.

"What?" Peter said, sitting up.

"Who was it?" Michelle asked.

Peter tried not to look as if he cared but he was sure that he was blushing now. It didn't feel nice to be on the other side of this interrogation.

"Maya." he shrugged.

"Maya Gardner?" MJ exclaimed loudly.

"Why are you shouting?" Peter smiled, as he looked at her.

"Because she's _really_ hot. Like _really_ hot."

"I'm aware of that, that's _why_ we had sex..." Peter said.

MJ punched him playfully and started laughing. He realized how weird what he said sounded coming from him and he was smiling uncontrollably too.

"So Peter the virgin is no more?" MJ said, eating some of his remaining pancake that he had abandoned.

"I guess not..." Peter replied.

"That is literally so hilarious..." MJ said.

She poured a shit ton of syrup, Peter thought, on the pancake, then sprinkled some sugar on top.

"MJ..." Peter laughed, looking at her disapprovingly and grabbing her wrist. "I have diabetes just from _watching_ you do that..."

He didn't know whether she was delirious from being tired or whether she just didn't mind eating like that in front of him. He couldn't even compare it to Liz's daily salad and Fiji water.

He watched her chew her pancake and tuck some of her curly hair behind her ear. It was odd, but he'd kind of never seen her _that_ happy since before the party. He was aware he was staring at her, so he looked down at his laptop for a second.

"I feel like we need to leave and go to the park..." MJ said. "We can finish the speech there. All this food is starting to become a distraction."

"The park is closed, MJ." Peter replied.

"So we climb over the gates, duh..." MJ said, smiling as if sneaking into a public park was totally normal. "Also, help me up - I'm full."

Peter took her hands and pulled her out of the chair. He wondered if she was asking to go to the park because she wanted to spend more time with him, or if she genuinely cared about finishing the speech.

They packed up their things and left the restaurant, making their way to Boston Public Garden. Peter wasn't thinking about the repercussions of trespassing, and he didn't think MJ was either.

With each other's help, they climbed over the gate successfully and settled in a grassy spot, by a tree. It was completely dark, and MJ used the torch on her phone for a source of light so that they could see what they were doing.

After what seemed like forever, they managed to meet the word count on their speech.

Peter sighed before shutting his laptop and looking at MJ.

"We did it..." he said, half-heartedly. "I know more now about vegetarianism than I will ever need to know in my life."

MJ coughed again, and then lay down on the grass. She looked equally as exhausted as Peter.

"What time is it?..." she asked, closing her eyes.

"Three thirty..." Peter said, worried that MJ was going to fall asleep while they were trespassing on public property. "We're supposed to meet Tyler back at the hotel at four."

"Screw Tyler..." MJ said, in a tone that sounded slightly angry. "And all his douchey, good for nothing friends."

"Isn't one of those douchey, good for nothing friends _your_ boyfriend?" Peter asked, looking at her again. She opened her eyes to look back at him and frowned.

"Andrew is _not_ my boyfriend, Peter." MJ replied. "He's just a guy I happened to sleep with once."

Peter lay down on the grass too so that he was close enough to MJ but not too close. He was truly exhausted at this point and wanted to shut his eyes and drift off to sleep too.

"I hope you know this isn't a date..." MJ said quietly.

"I never said it was..." Peter replied, sighing heavily.

He thought about if he wanted it to be a date. He thought about how much he used to hate MJ and how now, he really just wanted to talk to her and play with her hair.

He wanted to tell her so badly about what happened at lunch the other day, and ask her about the photos online, and Flash's Instagram account.

"Do you still not care?..." Peter asked. "About all the shit going on online?"

"Nope..." MJ replied. "If I cared, I'd just tell my dad...but I don't wanna burden him. He's kinda all I have left."

"So..." Peter started. "Your mom-"

"Left a couple years ago..." MJ said, finishing Peter's sentence. "She's kind of not a thing anymore."

"Oh..." Peter said, "I'm sorry."

"There's no need to be. Life's kinda better without her."

Peter suddenly felt a chill from the wind and wished that he'd worn more layers.

"I guess you understand the single parent life..." MJ continued. "You know that they're there but you also know that they're doing _everything_ so you never wanna make their job harder. It's like your family is this perfect picture and then one day it all goes to shit."

Peter sighed.

"I don't really remember what it was like to have a perfect family..." he said. "My mom and dad died when I was four...in a plane crash."

Peter didn't know why he felt tears burning at the back of his eyes. The topic of his parents never seemed to be brought up and it never ever made him want to cry.

But laying there at that moment, he felt vulnerable as fuck.

"I'm so sorry, Peter..." MJ said, her voice sounding shaky.

There was a silence as Peter wished he hadn't confided in MJ and they both lay there, staring at the sky. He'd never really told anyone exactly what happened to his parents - except Ned.

All he could hear was the sound of cars driving by outside the park and MJ's breathing.

He felt her hand make his way to his, and both their fingers interlock. Peter's heart rate increased again. It always did when he was confused or nervous or angry.

"I thought you said this wasn't a date..." Peter said, looking at MJ, who now looked back at him.

"It's not..." she replied. "I just wanted to hold your hand, Parker."

Peter thought about how soft and delicate her hand was, and how he kinda didn't want her to let go.

His heart was beating even faster, and he didn't know what to do. MJ's dark brown eyes seemed to sparkle in the moonlight, and Peter thought how he didn't notice before that she had such nice eyes, and how weird it was that he was even thinking about that now.

Impulsively, he moved closer to her, still holding her hand.

"Are you _okay,_ MJ?" He whispered, staring into her eyes. "Like, are you really okay?"

She had that look on her face like she did when Peter left her house that night. Like she was angry but a little hurt on the inside, and that she didn't want to say anything.

"Yes..." MJ said, sounding like she was trying to convince herself.

"Are you sure?" Peter repeated, realizing that they'd never been that close before, and that his heart rate was through the roof.

"Yeah." MJ said again, sounding more sure than she did before. "I'm fine...and I don't need you to worry about me."

Peter nodded, though he knew he wasn't convinced. He was wondering why he cared deep down, and if - even in the slightest - he liked MJ.

She turned her body round to face his. They were so close now that MJ's curls caressed Peter's face. All of a sudden, she ran her hands through Peter's hair, and it sent shockwaves right through him.

_This isn't a date,_ Peter thought, trying to figure out why he was so close to MJ and why she was touching him.

He _wanted_ to kiss her. Badly.

"Well, if you need someone to talk to..." Peter said. "I'm always here."

"Thank God..." MJ whispered, sounding the most sincere that she had ever sounded.

Peter stared at her. His mouth felt so dry. Then he slowly leaned in towards her and put his lips to hers. Then he was kissing her. It was like he was experiencing every emotion he could possibly experience. He couldn't even believe what was happening. It was different to any other kiss he'd had before. It was like MJ was this fragile human being that could break at any second.

MJ broke away after a few seconds.

"You'll get sick..." she said, looking worried.

He wanted to stay in that moment forever. There, lying with MJ in the cold weather, and being closer to her than he'd ever been.

"I don't care..." Peter replied, kissing her again.  
This time, she kissed him back. His hands found their way to her back and he pulled her closer.

_Oh my God,_ Peter thought.

He was in the middle of Boston, in a park, kissing _MJ._ He frankly didn't mind if he caught her 'deathly' illness - as long as he could have _this_ moment with her.

MJ broke away for the second time, panting from not being able to breathe for a while. He was out of breath too, but he kind of liked it.

She sat up from her position on the ground, and started to pack up her things.

"Where are you going?" Peter said.

"I don't-" she stammered. "Do you think I'm just...do you think I'm going to have sex with you here?"

Peter was confused.

"MJ..." he started. "It was just a kiss and it wasn't going to be anything more than that."

MJ shook her head and stood up, throwing her backpack over her shoulder.

" _Where_ are you going?" Peter asked again.

She stopped and turned to look at him.

"I can't go to school on Monday..." she said. "Not with - I can't sit at that fucking table again!"

"Then _don't._ " Peter exclaimed, grabbing his laptop and walking after her as she stormed off.

"You don't...understand..." she panted, starting to climb over the gate again.

It only took a moment for Peter to realize that MJ was having a panic attack, and that he needed to get her _out_ of there.

"MJ..." Peter said, following her. As carefully as he could, he climbed over the gate, nearly falling over in the process. "You don't even know where you're going."

He grabbed her arm to stop her walking any further. There were tears streaming down her face now.

"You need to breathe..." he said, as she shook her head at him.

"No...I can't!" she shouted, crying. "I can't."

Peter _hated_ this.

He hated watching her suffer and he hated not really knowing what to do about it. He hated the park, and the fact that he was exhausted. He hated this God forsaken trip...and everyone on the debate team.

"Its not your fault." He whispered, pulling her into a hug. "It's not your fault."

He knew something was very _wrong._ More wrong than he could try and explain.

But for some strange reason, Peter cast his mind back to the photos of MJ...and all he wanted to do was fuck Tyler up.

 


	5. MJ, MJ, MJ

Peter walked MJ back to the hotel. They didn't say much to each other at all. He just tried to get her mind off the panic attack she just had. But during most of the small talk, he couldn't really concentrate on what she was saying.

He just wanted to know who hurt her and why.

"I'm gonna go upstairs." She said, when they arrived.

She had pulled her hoodie over her head and strands of her curly hair hung out, blowing over in the wind.

Peter wanted to put her hands in her hair and kiss her again, and again.

"Okay. I'm gonna stay outside for a bit. I'm really not that tired." Peter lied.

MJ nodded.

"Thanks." She said, before walking past him, towards the back of the hotel. "Goodnight, Parker."

"Goodnight." He replied, as he watched her walk in.

He was freezing. But he was determined to wait for Tyler. He shoved his hands in his pockets and leant on a car parked next to the hotel.  
After what seemed like forever, he saw Tyler arrive with Emily. Emily looked so drunk that Peter thought she was going to fall on the street.

"I'm gonna go up..." she laughed.

Tyler put her hand behind her neck and kissed her.

Peter looked away. It seemed like they were making out forever.

"You head on up." He heard Tyler say. "I've got to make sure these Juniors get back."

"Okay." Emily replied, giggling.

He saw her small body and dip dyed hair, disappear into the hotel. Peter didn't even think Tyler had seen him. Not for long.

"Peter!" Tyler exclaimed, walking up to Peter, who was still by the car. "First Junior back. You get a gold star....I'm kidding..."

Peter just swallowed. He wasn't laughing.

"Listen, Man." He said, folding his arms. "I've got a few questions for you."

"Shoot." Tyler said, not looking fazed.

"Why were you taking pictures of MJ at Liz's party?" He asked.

He could feel his breath quickening again.

"I didn't." Tyler said. "And this conversation is now over."

Tyler turned around but Peter grabbed his arm and forcefully turned him around.

"Hey!" He shouted, in Tyler's face. "I _know_ you did. Flash said you did- so cut the bullshit!"

Tyler burst out laughing.

"Are you fucking MJ now?" He snickered. "Is that what this is about?"

"Shut the hell up, Tyler-"

"I've gotta say, you've really gotten around." Tyler said, yanking his arm away from Peter's grip. "First Liz, then Maya, now MJ. Let your dick fucking rest, Parker."

Peter's patience was starting to run out.

"I don't blame you though." Tyler said, getting right up in Peter's face. "Loads of people have fucked her, apparently. You know, because she's a _slut?_ I hear they say the bitch doesn't shut up- then she passes out after a few minutes. And then you can carry on fucking her, because.....that's all she's good for-"

Peter rammed his fists in Tyler's face. He didn't expect it. He was disgusted. He wanted to beat up anybody who ever talked about her like that.

Tyler staggered back, holding his nose. He was in agony, blood trickling down his face.

"You're dead, Parker!" He shouted, grabbing Peter by his shirt and shoving him into the car he was standing by.

Peter collided with the car with such force, that he rolled over into the street. He couldn't feel his body for a second.

He heard Tyler coming up behind him and was ready to be punched till he passed out, but then the sound of Mrs Gale's voice came piercing through the air.

"Tyler Farrel!" He heard her shout. "What on _earth_ is going on here?"

Peter slowly stood up to his feet. He could feel his arms and legs throbbing.

"Peter, why is there blood on Tyler's face?" She screamed.

"I hit him." Peter said, shrugging.

At that moment, the rest of debate club came bounding down the road, laughing and screaming. As soon as they saw Mrs Gale, they started swearing and muttering under their breaths.

"Get the _hell_ inside!" She shouted. "All of you!  
To reception, now! I'm taking a register!"

Peter saw everyone go silent. They began to walk into the hotel, looking solemn, glancing over and staring right into Peter's soul.

"Get yourself cleaned up, both of you." Mrs Gale said, tutting. "And you can forget that recommendation for Yale, Tyler. And your presidency."

Tyler opened his mouth to protest but Mrs Gale started shouting again, reminding him not to dare try and talk back.

Peter felt bad. But not bad enough to give a shit. He began walking back to the hotel. His whole body felt like it was on fire. Tyler caught up with him, Mrs Gale now a little behind them.

"You're a little bitch, aren't you?" He whispered to Peter. "You are _so_ fucked."

And with that, he shoved Peter with his shoulder and walked ahead of him.

Peter sighed.

He was less annoyed about Tyler's stupid presidency and more annoyed that still, he hadn't gotten closer to the truth about MJ.  
  
  


Midtown high lost the debate. Emily, now the new president, reluctantly selected MJ and Peter's speech. They were good, but they were just not a match for the WestRiver kids, who weren't a bunch of science students trying to add yet another activity to their college application. They meant business.

But Peter didn't mind, because it meant he got to spend more time with MJ and that they could laugh about how over enthusiastic the WestRiver students were. Though, that was all it was. After the speech, they sort of didn't talk much to each other for the rest of the trip.

It was Monday and the day of Peter's physics midterm. He had been up since 5am, sat on the kitchen table with his Physics textbook, flicking through the pages frantically. He needed to get an A, and that was that.

He got out his flash cards and a pen and started adding to his notes and highlighting things. Tests always kind of stressed him out.

He heard the door to May's room open. She was still in her pajamas. She put on her glasses as she shut the door to her room.

"Morning, Peter." She yawned, walking up to the table. "How long have you been out here?"

"A few hours..." Peter sighed, checking his watch. "I've got an hour till the test starts."

"That's more than enough time..." May said, the sound of her slippers shuffling, as she walked up to the counter to make herself a coffee.

Peter kept on reading, muttering equations under his breath. Aunt May watched him as she made her coffee then sat down next to him on the table.

"You'll be fine as always, Peter." She sighed.

"Relax."

Peter stopped muttering and looked up at Aunt May. The way she smiled made him feel safe and calmed his nerves.

She took a sip of her coffee.

"You know, just after you were born..." she said, pushing Peter's curls behind his ear.  
"Your Dad and I were both in the delivery room. And the nurse placed you in your Mom's arms. And she was crying of course, because she was so worried about the pregnancy...but you were just fine. You were perfect."

Peter swallowed. He didn't mind when she talked about his parents, but his heart still stung a little bit.

"And she looked up at me and your Dad." Aunt May continued, "And she said, 'Look at him, he's going to be _so_ smart.' And I thought she just had _mom_ brain you know, but she was right. You're so _freakin_ smart, Peter."

Peter smiled.

"Thanks, May." He said, his voice cracking up.

He reached out to hug her and May put down her coffee, before pulling him into her arms.

He wanted to stay there forever. And when he let go of her, he felt a whole lot better.

"I feel like we haven't really talked in a while." She said, pushing up her glasses. "It's been all go, go, go....I get it, you have midterms, but, we just need to talk."

Peter nodded. He was playing with his fingers underneath the table.

"I don't want to be the embarrassing Aunt..." she said, taking another sip of her coffee. "And it's totally fine if you think this is none of my business, but have you.....had _sex_ with anyone yet?"

Peter looked Aunt May right in the eyes. He laughed, which he didn't anticipate.

"I know, I know... its a touchy subject, right?  
"Okay, you know what? You don't have to tell me." She laughed.

Peter sat up.

"No, it's fine." He said, cracking his knuckles.

"Um...I did.....I guess. Once."

"You guess?" Aunty May asked. "Were you sober?"

"I remember it happening, yes, May." He said.

He couldn't believe he was actually talking to her about this.

"Honey, I'm just trying to make sure you're safe." She smiled, putting a hand on Peter's shoulder. "I'm sorry if I'm invading your privacy.....so, did you use _protection?"_

The way she said pro-tec-tion sort of made Peter want to die.

"Yeah." He said bluntly, trying not to blush.

"Okay, Okay, I won't ask anything else." She said, taking her hand off his shoulder, but then she leaned in towards him. "Was it with MJ?"

"What?" Peter smirked. "No. Her name's Maya...anyway - it didn't matter. It was stupid. Can I _go?_ "

"Yes, Peter. You can go to your Physics Midterm." Aunt May sighed, before giving him a big kiss on the cheek. "I love you, okay? Just talk to me more- you're all I have."

Peter stood up, as he shoved his stuff in his bag.

"Love you too." He said, as he zipped up his bag.

"Good luck." May shouted, on his way out.

After he got off the subway, Peter got out his flash cards and went through them as he made his way to school. This would be the first time he would be in school after what happened with Tyler.

He just wanted to take the midterm, then get the hell out of there.

When he walked in, most people were in groups, studying in the corridor. He was glad that no one was really paying attention to him. He was also glad that there was no sign of Maya, or Tyler.

Peter walked up to his locker and opened it, before getting out another highlighter. Classes were not being held, and there were lots of kids using the classrooms for studying. He made a left at the end of the corridor and looked to see if there were any free spaces.

He saw a girl with an Astroworld hoodie, sat alone at a desk in a classroom. She had her face in a Physics textbook.

He knew it was MJ when she put down the book and frowned, taking her hood off to reveal the curly hair Peter knew and loved.

He hadn't really spoken to her since the end of the debate club trip. He suddenly felt calm, pushing the door open.

"Thought you said you didn't find any tour merch." Peter said, shutting the door behind him.

MJ looked up. She smiled.

"My Dad-"

"Knows a guy?" Peter said, finishing her sentence. He pulled up a chair from behind the teachers desk and sat directly opposite her.

"I'm screwed." She sighed, running a hand through her hair. "I'm just going to accept my fate."

"Do you want me to test you?" Peter asked. "I've got flash cards."

"Can we talk about something that's not Physics for these last few minutes?"

"Okay." Peter said.

Her eyes lit up and she smiled again. He loved her smile.

"Do you have any plans for Thanksgiving?" He asked her.

"No...my Dad's going on a trip for work tomorrow, so I'm home alone. He offered for me to fly over for a few days, but....I really don't want to."

"So come to mine." Peter said, as casually as he could. "May's having a cute dinner. My uncle is coming over and he's bringing his kid. I'm sure May will enjoy your company- she loves you."

MJ looked at Peter, like she couldn't really believe that she had been invited over to his place, willingly.

"Yeah, sure, why not?" She said.

Peter wanted to kiss her then. But he didn't.

"You're staring at me, Parker." She said. "Are you okay?"

"I'm good." He laughed, standing up.

She stood up too, laughing.

"Our midterm starts in five minutes. Keep it in your pants."

They walked over together to the gym hall where the test was. Peter wished her good luck but the seating was done in alphabetical order, so she was on a completely different side of the gym.

Peter slid into the desk, sharpening his pencil.

He looked back to see MJ, about eight or nine rows back, tapping on the desk. She didn't notice him.

The test seemed to last forever.

Peter felt like he was doing a good job but he kept on doubting himself on the last few questions, erasing his answers and re-writing them, over and over again.

He sighed a huge sigh of relief when it was over and waited for MJ outside the gym.

"How'd you find it?" He asked, as soon as she was out.

"Yeah, it went okay." She replied. "You?"

"I don't know, I felt like it could have gone better..."

"That's what you'll say, Peter - then you'll get a 95." MJ said, playfully messing up Peter's hair.

They walked out through the doors of the school.

"My Dad's picking me up from here in a few minutes." MJ said.

"Cool- so I'll see you tomorrow night?"

"Yes, you'll see me. And I'll try not to look like a wreck..."

"Don't worry, it's not that big of a deal." Peter shrugged, putting his bag over his shoulder. "I gotta get on the subway."

MJ put her hand on his shoulder and kissed him on the cheek.

"See ya, Parker."

She ran over to her Dad's car and got in, not looking back. Peter touched his cheek.  
He hardly even noticed that he was smiling all the way home.  
  
  


"You can put the turkey on the table..." May said, handing Peter a massive plate.

He placed it at the centre of the table. The living room had been rearranged, giving the illusion that it was bigger.

"Anything else?" He asked Aunt May.

"No, thanks Peter", she said, bending down to check on the roast potatoes. "You go and get yourself dressed, I think our guests should be here in the next fifteen minutes."

Peter nodded, making his way into his room.

He got out of his sweats and put on a blue shirt and some black jeans. That was as fancy as it was getting for him. He was actually super excited for thanksgiving dinner for once. Well, mainly because MJ would be there and he could finally talk to someone his age.

Peter slipped on his trainers, put on some cologne,  then made his way out of his room, just as the doorbell rang.

"I'll get it!" He called to Aunt May, who was now pouring the soup into a large jug.  
It was Uncle Dave and his five year old daughter, Maisie.

"Peter!" Maisie squealed, hugging Peter's knees.

"Hey, Peter." Uncle Dave said. "You've grown, yet again."

Peter hugged them both. He was always told Uncle Dave looked a lot like his Dad. He had a lot of stubble, and brown curls, just like Peter.

His daughter Maisie did not resemble him at all: her hair was a browny-red, and it was beautifully plaited into two. Kind of like how Maya always wore her hair.

 _Ugh. Maya._ Peter thought.

May left the cooking for a bit to say hi to  Maisie, before hugging Uncle Dave.

"Look how beautiful you look, May." Uncle Davies said. "Ben would be so proud of all you do for Peter."

Aunt May smiled.

"Thanks Dave." She said. "Please, have a seat. Peter's having one of his friends, over."

"A girl?" Maisie shouted, sliding down in her seat.

"Yes, a girl." May said, finally putting the potatoes down on the table, then the jug of soup. "Her name's MJ."

"MJ!" Maisie sang. "MJ, MJ, MJ!"

Peter smiled. He liked how the name sounded when she said it.

"We'll just wait for her." May said, sliding into her seat at the end of the table.

Peter sat down too. MJ's plate was next to Peter's, closest to the door, just like Peter had asked. A wave of nervousness suddenly overcame him. He started to think that maybe she wouldn't come and that maybe this was a bad idea, just as the doorbell rang.

Peter stood up before May could. His hands were shaking.

 _Relax, Peter_ he thought.

He opened the door to see MJ standing there. She was wearing a red turtleneck and a black skirt. Peter had never seen her in red before- it suited her. Her beautiful hair was scraped back into a high ponytail. Peter thought she looked perfect, from her red lipstick right down to her red pumps.

"Hey, MJ." Peter said. "You look....really good."

"Thanks, Parker." MJ smiled, stepping into the apartment. "My Dad said I had to bring champagne."

"Oh, thanks sweetie!" Aunt May said, getting up and kissing MJ on the cheek.

She took the champagne and put it on the table, as Peter introduced MJ to Uncle Dave and Maisie.

"MJ, MJ, MJ!" Maisie shouted, which made MJ laugh.

Peter pulled out MJ's chair for her and MJ thoroughly enjoyed mocking how much of a gentleman he was being.

"Dig in!" May said, passing various stuff down the table.

Peter tried to not to stare at MJ too much. He just couldn't really believe how beautiful she was. And why he didn't notice this earlier.

"So, MJ, are you more into science or math?" Uncle Dave asked, pouring some champagne into May's glass.

"I kind of suck at math." MJ said, trying a piece of her turkey. "Oh my god....this is amazing. Thank you, May. Sorry, where was I? I like Physics the most. I think."

Uncle Dave smiled. He seemed to really love her personality, which made Peter feel relaxed.

"Peter doesn't suck at math though." MJ said, nudging Peter. "Mr 4.0 gpa."

"I guess I _don't_ suck at math." Peter said, before taking a sip of his water.

Uncle Dave had an amazing time talking to MJ about the new telescope NASA were building and her views on teleportation.

"They can teleport people?" May asked, her eyebrows furrowing.

"No, it's just trash." Peter said.

"But they've teleported photons in the past." MJ said. "Technically, it could happen for humans. We would just have to be regenerated piece by piece...so we'd basically die in the process."

Uncle Dave and May laughed.

"No use then." Uncle Dave said, turning to Maisie and telling her to eat her vegetables.

They talked about everything. May and Uncle Dave were so interested in everything MJ had to say. About politics, college, human rights, the news- she had something to say about everything and Peter loved her for it.

"Thank you so much for the meal, May. It was _literally_ amazing." MJ said.

"No problem, dear. You can come by anytime you want - there are going to be leftovers for days." May replied, reaching out to touch MJ's hand.

"Well, we better be going." Uncle Dave said, getting up and then lifting Maisie into his arms. "She's really too big to be being carried."

"Bye, MJ!" Maise shouted.

"Byeee!" MJ shouted back, waving madly.

Peter got the door. May said her goodbyes and then they were gone.

"Wow, I love them. Can they adopt me?" MJ said, once they had left.

May laughed, as MJ started to pick up the plates on the table.

"Oh no, honey, you don't have to do that. It's getting late...maybe Peter can walk you home?"  
May asked, collecting the plates from MJ.

"Yeah, sure." Peter said, grabbing his jacket from behind the door.

May pulled MJ into a hug.

"Have a good week, May." MJ said.

Peter held the door open for MJ and she stepped out.

"I'll be back in a minute!" Peter called to May, before stepping out and closing the door behind him. They stepped into the elevator together. MJ stood still, her back against the elevator wall.

"Thanks for inviting me, Parker." She said.

Every time Peter looked at her, he honestly couldn't believe how pretty she looked.

"I'm glad you came." He replied, as he moved to stand next to her.

She glanced at him for a good few seconds as the elevator took them down.

Peter was going to say something like 'Hey, remember when I was passed out in this elevator?'

But he'd begun to learn that it never ended well when he brought up the night of the party.

It was _really_ cold that night. Peter draped his coat around MJ as he walked her home.

"I kind of love your family." MJ said to him, as they crossed the street.

"You do?"

"Yeah, your aunt is so nice. And your uncle is so dope. And your cousin is beautiful."

He didn't think she'd ever complimented him that much before.

"Thanks." He said, shoving his hands in his pockets.

"And your cologne smells nice." MJ added.

"Thanks." Peter said.

"And blue is a good color on you."

Peter blushed. He couldn't believe that this MJ was the same MJ that came up to him, asking him to get her into Liz's party but it was. He had just gotten to know her. And she was pretty cool.

"Well red is a good color on you." Peter said, firmly.

MJ told Peter about how this guy was trying to copy her answers yesterday in the midterm, and how her Dad had left her loads of cash but she wasn't going to spend it, and how she literally couldn't find any motivation to study for the rest of her midterms.

And Peter listened. In fact, he really loved listening to her lately. He could sit down and listen to her talk for hours.

They finally got to her house and MJ began opening the doors with her keys.

Peter stood at the bottom of the porch stairs.

"You can come in if you would like, Parker." MJ said.

Peter smiled, following MJ into her house. She turned on the lights as she locked the door behind her.

Peter wondered how she managed staying alone in such a big place by herself.

"I can finally take off these pumps..." MJ said, kicking off her shoes and hoisting herself unto the kitchen counter.

Peter joined her. He didn't have much to say to her.

"I'm so impressed that my lipstick didn't get anywhere!" MJ said, touching her lips with her fingers. "It's like super matte. This formula is like so different to any other lipstick I've tried. Seriously - and it's super wearable. It's not even that drying. I think it was only like eight dollars, as well."

"Really?" Peter laughed. "What brand?"

"I think I got it from Sephora." MJ said, bursting into laughter. "Oh my god...you don't care."

Peter threw his head back now, still laughing.

"You were dead serious, as well." He said.

MJ was crying of laughter now, and wiping tears from her eyes.

"Wow." She said, once she had fully calmed down.

Peter looked at her again. This time, she looked at him back. And she didn't make some snarky comment about how he was staring into her soul.

"You wanna go sit down, Parker?" MJ asked, softly.

"Sure." Peter replied.

She got down from the counter and so did Peter, then he followed her to the couch.

"So..." Peter said. "Should I-"

MJ kissed Peter. She put her arms around his neck and he was glad she kissed him, because he really _was_ dying to kiss her ever since she walked into his apartment that night.

So Peter kissed her back. And it felt just as good as that night in the park.

He really wanted to take off her clothes. And pull her bare body close to his, but he knew he had to be careful with her.

MJ broke away, catching her breath.

She bit her lip, slowly combing her hand through his hair, before placing her fingers on his mouth.

"It's _Super_ matte." She laughed.

Peter leant in to kiss her again, smiling against her lips. This time the kiss was more intense. All he kept thinking is that he could do this forever.

He supported her with his arm, as he kissed her and laid her down on the couch. He was never sure how far she wanted to go, so he just let her lead.

She grabbed his shirt, pulling him towards her.

Peter slipped his hand up underneath her sweater, unclipping her bra in the process. He liked the way her skin felt on his fingers.

He wasn't sure if he should have done that but MJ didn't complain. She just kept on kissing Peter.

She broke away for a second, starting to unbutton his shirt. She was concentrating on what she was doing, and didn't look up at Peter once. Peter took it off and pulled MJ unto him.

He kissed her slowly again, putting his hands round her back. Then his hands ran down her back, over her thighs-

And MJ flinched.

Peter moved his hands away quickly.

"Are you okay?" He asked.

Her expression changed almost instantly into a blank one.

She looked as if she didn't realize that she was really there with him. She closed her eyes, leaning into to kiss Peter's mouth again.

Peter hands moved to her waist, then down to her hips-

And MJ flinched again.

"MJ." Peter said. "Are you okay?"

"Peter, I can't......do this right now, okay?" She said, sitting up and swinging her legs off the couch.

Peter moved to sit next to her.

"I'm not going to hurt you." He said, putting his hand on her lap.

"Don't touch me." She said, standing up. "It's...it's not you..."

 _What the hell?_ Peter thought.

"Listen..." she said, her breath quickening, and tears stinging in her eyes. "Can we just do something else? Like watch a movie or something? I'd much prefer if we just watched a movie-"

"Okay, okay.." Peter said. "MJ, we don't have to....we can do what you want."

She was shaking.

 _Why is she shaking?_ Peter thought.

"Okay." MJ nodded, turning around and heading towards the stairs.

"Where are you going?" Peter asked.

"Am I allowed to go and get changed, Peter?" She snapped. "Can I do that?"

"MJ, do what you want!" Peter exclaimed.  
"Jesus..."

MJ ran up the stairs. He heard her slam the door to her room. He grabbed his shirt and threw it down on the floor.

He was so frustrated with himself for taking it too far. But he really thought that MJ wanted to have sex with him. He didn't _ask_ her, but he was pretty sure she wanted to.

"You're so fucking stupid.." Peter said to himself, standing up.

He wanted to go upstairs into her room and make sure she was okay but he didn't want to make her any more mad.

He paced up and down the living room, waiting for her to come back. He even grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge and drank it all- and MJ had still not come back down.

He walked up to the bin and threw the bottle in there. Then he stopped.

In the bin, there were pieces of torn up paper.

_Were these from a diary?_

And they looked like MJ's handwriting. He looked up to see if she was coming down and still, there was no sign of her.

Peter impulsively reached into the bin and picked out a few pieces, trying to make sense of a few sentences.

 _'...lying there was my perfect escape...'_  
_'....I had no where to run to, he...'_  
_'...Liz asked him to take me upstairs...'_

Peter heard MJ's door unlock and he immediately stood up, backing away from the bin. His heart was racing. All she had done was put a different top on. She looked as if she had been crying.

Thoughts that he despised were filling his head. More thoughts than he wanted to think.

"May's going to be wondering where I am."  
Peter said, randomly.

"I didn't want to watch a movie, anyway." MJ replied.

"Okay." Peter just said, walking up to the couch and grabbing his shirt, before putting it on.

"You look mad." MJ sighed.

"MJ, I'm not mad." He said, hurriedly.

But he _was._ She had been lying. She had been lying about something this whole time.

"You are!" MJ shouted. "Oh my God, just because I didn't want to have _sex_ with you, Peter? Is that it?"

"No, that's not it." Peter said, walking up to the door.

He didn't want to be around her in that moment. He wanted her to leave him alone. He could feel that ringing sensation between his ears, his knees starting to shake, sweat starting to build up on his forehead.

"Then what the hell is it?" MJ screamed. "I don't _want_ to fuck you-"

"Stop it!" Peter shouted, grabbing her arm. "Stop fucking screaming at me!"

"Ow!" MJ exclaimed, yanking her arm away.  
She put her hands on Peter's chest and pushed him back forcefully.

"MJ..." Peter said, immediately sorry.

"Get away from me." MJ said, backing away.

"MJ-"

"Get out!" MJ screamed.

Peter opened the door and stepped out, slamming the door behind him. He could barely breathe.

He could barely process all that just happened. And worse, he had realized that he had only just scratched the surface. There was so much more to MJ. There was so much more to find out about that night.

Liz. Tyler. Andrew. Flash.

They had _all_ been lying, including MJ. If she wasn't going to do herself justice, _he_ would. He owed it to her.

Peter began walking home. He made a vow to himself that he would get to the bottom of it, whatever it was.

Starting from tomorrow.

Starting by getting the combination to MJ's locker.

 


	6. 930

The night after the Thanksgiving dinner was probably the worst night of sleep Peter had ever had. Every time he shut his eyes, he pictured MJ, in her high ponytail and red lips, screaming at him. He replayed all the possible scenarios of them kissing on that couch in his head.

_I shouldn't have touched her,_ Peter thought.

He figured that maybe if he hadn't kissed her back, maybe if _he_ had suggested that they just chill and watch a movie, then she wouldn't have panicked and he wouldn't have gotten angry.

He had an idea of what might have happened to MJ that night at Liz's party, but he didn't want to believe it, nor could he come to terms with who might have been involved, and why MJ had written what she wrote in her diary.

Was he invading her privacy for doing that? Should he have stolen that piece of paper that led him closer to any answers that he may have been looking for?

Either way, he knew he had a responsibility and he knew he had to do it for MJ.

The next morning, before school, Peter grabbed a blank notebook lying on his desk and copied MJ's words verbatim onto it. He thought that if he started documenting a chain of findings, then it would lead him closer to the truth.

On that same day, as Peter walked into school, he knew that he could forget about his reputation, and sitting at the senior table. Not only had he ended things with Maya, but he'd punched Tyler in the face.

The same people that usually looked up at him and gave him welcoming smiles just kind of turned their heads passive-aggressively.   
At this point, Peter didn't care. He didn't care what they thought of him, he didn't care who he sat with at lunch, he didn't care how he was going to do in his Physics mid-term and he didn't care about how many girls were attracted to him.

In the hallway, he noticed Ned talking to a girl he knew from his Calculus class and breathed a sigh of relief.

With all the will left in his soul, he approached them both and tapped Ned on the shoulder.  
Ned turned round to look at Peter menacingly, and Peter realized at that moment that they hadn't spoken in like a month.

"Ned..." Peter said, rubbing the back of his neck nervously. "I need...to talk to you...alone..."

Ned rolled his eyes and sighed heavily before gesturing to the girl beside him that he would 'see her later'. He folded his arms and stared right into Peter's eyes.

"You know, Peter..." he began, his voice quiet and embedded with anger. "You can't just start talking to me because you're no longer popular or whatever..."

Peter looked at Ned pleadingly.

"I..." Peter stammered. "Ned...I'm _so_ sorry. I know I apologized before...but this time...I _mean_ it. I've been acting like a total douche, and I'm a horrible person."

Ned wasn't even looking at Peter at this point. He was glancing aimlessly at people passing down the hallway.

" _Ned..._ " Peter pleaded. "Just talk to me...please."

He didn't know why there were tears stinging at the back of his eyes. He didn't know why he felt the need to be emotional and cry about everything these days.

Ned looked back at Peter and frowned.  
"If you have something to explain-" Ned started.

"I do, I have a lot of things to explain..." Peter replied.

Peter looked all around him and then lowered his voice.

"Not here..." he whispered, grabbing Ned's shoulder and steering him towards the janitor's closet, before letting them both in and locking the door behind them.

Peter breathed a sigh of relief, before leaning against a shelf of cleaning utensils.

"Peter...what's going on?" Ned asked, actually sounding like he cared for once.

Then Peter told Ned. _Everything._ From the beginning. How that night at the concert, MJ left mysteriously. How she was supposed to be dating Andrew. How she was MIA for a couple of weeks. How he tried to forget MJ and lost his virginity. How he started sitting at the senior table. How he discovered that Flash and a couple of other people were slut shaming MJ on social media. How Tyler had taken those photos of MJ. How he ended things with Maya. How MJ had a panic attack on the debate trip. How he punched Tyler in the face. How he invited MJ over for Thanksgiving. How him and MJ nearly had sex. How she broke away from him and was scared. How he found that torn up piece from her diary, and how he was trying to do everything in his power to figure out what the _fuck_ was going on.

Ned's eyes widened in disbelief as Peter finished his story.

"So..." Ned said. "You think something happened to MJ."

"I don't want to believe it myself..." Peter replied, shaking his head and feeling sick all of a sudden.

"So..." Ned continued, biting his nails as he processed his thoughts. "You need to get MJ's locker combination, so you can find something...and what do you expect to find?"

"Literally _anything,_ Ned..." Peter replied.

"Anything that will lead me closer to the truth. MJ isn't at school today and I don't think she'll be coming back for a while. She _hates_ the seniors - she doesn't want anything to do with them."

"Wow...okay..." Ned sighed. "That was a lot of information to digest. And I...I understand why you were trying to protect MJ, and why you were being a douche all this time...and I feel bad about the whole MJ 'getting in everyone's pants' thing."

Peter looked up at Ned, and Ned looked back at him.

"And..." Ned said. "This is the dumbest, craziest most _stupidest_ idea you have ever had...but you're my best friend, so I'm gonna help you."

Peter breathed a sigh of relief again. He walked up to Ned and hugged him, and Ned hugged him back. Peter could feel the tears that were stinging at the back of his eyes escape onto his cheeks.

"Peter?..." Ned said, still embracing him in the hug. "Are you crying, dude?"

Peter let go of Ned.

"Maybe..." he said, wiping his eyes with the back of his hand.

He just couldn't believe that they were now in this crazy situation, and that Ned had forgiven him, and that Ned had called him his best friend again.

"I'm okay..." Peter said, drying the last of his tears, and placing his hand on the door handle to open it. "Let's go."  
  
  
  
  
  
  


At lunch, Peter was happy to have regained his usual spot next to Ned. They had moved on to other conversations like midterms, and what their plans for next summer were, and what they were gonna get their family for Christmas.

Peter glanced over at the senior table and examined who was still sitting on it. There were the usual people - Liz, Emily, Brian, Tyler, Andrew, and Maya. Joined by Flash, Annabel, and a few other _popular_ Juniors. No sign of MJ - not that Peter was expecting that anyway. And then a new kid, with long-ish curly hair and hazel eyes. Wearing a varsity jacket.

Peter narrowed his eyes at the table. People kept coming and going, but he'd literally never seen this guy in his life.

He nudged Ned who was now looking at the senior table too.

"Who's that?" Peter said, with a mouthful of chips.

"That guy?" Ned said. "That's Oscar Rutherford, a senior. He's been homeschooled for the past few weeks. He's a quarterback...and he may also be the guy who can help us."

"The guy who can help us?" Peter said, turning to look at Ned.

"I heard that he knows the master code to everyone's lockers..." Ned said. "He's stealthy like that."

"Then we'll have to ask him about it...won't we?" Peter said, feeling his heart rate start to quicken at the thought of approaching another senior.

As he watched everyone from the table get up and get to where they were going, he watched Oscar dump his leftover food in the trash, and head out the cafeteria's double doors.

"I've gotta get to Mechanics, Peter..." Ned said, standing up.

"Okay..." Peter replied. "I'll catch you later...I've gotta go talk to Oscar."

He and Ned did the handshake that Peter knew and loved, before parting ways.

Peter slung his backpack over his shoulder and went though the double doors, looking around for where Oscar might be.

He saw him bump fists with Andrew in the hallway, and then walk past him to the vending machine.

Peter, with his head down, darted through the corridor and made his way across to Oscar, who had now selected a Snickers bar and was standing there, on his phone.

"Hey..." Peter said, loud enough to get Oscar's attention.

Oscar turned around to look at him.

_Jesus,_ Peter thought. He was stunning, but in a weird, boyish kind of way.

"You're Oscar, right?" Peter said. "I'm Peter."

"I know who you are..." Oscar laughed, smiling in a way that made Peter want to die.

Peter wondered how the hell Oscar knew him and then figured that it might be from all the rumours flying around about him.

Oscar bent down to grab his Snickers bar, before opening it and taking a large bite.

"I've just..." Peter stammered. "I've literally never seen you before."

Oscar sniggered to himself while chewing, kicking the side of the vending machine with his foot gently.

"I joined Midtown for my senior year..." he said, his voice sounding soft and low. "I've been homeschooled for the past couple of weeks because my Dad wanted me to get ahead. And now I'm back so..."

"Right..." Peter said, looking down at the floor. His heart was beating out of his chest and he just wanted to get this conversation over with.

"Anyway..." Oscar said, narrowing his eyes at Peter. "What the _fuck_ do you want?"

"I..." Peter stammered. "I need to get into this other guy's locker so I can steal his Calculus notes."

Peter knew that this was a fat ass lie, but obviously didn't want to tell Oscar the _real_ reason why he was snooping around.

"Oh..." Oscar said, widening his eyes like he knew what Peter was trying to say. "You need the almighty locker combination. But aren't you like the smartest Junior in the whole school? Why do you need other people's notes?"

Peter shrugged, hoping that Oscar wouldn't suspect anything.

"Whatever..." Oscar said, rolling his eyes. "It's 930...opens everyone's locker."

"Thanks..." Peter said, trying not to sound too relieved.

"You're quite polite aren't you?" Oscar smiled, walking past Peter and messing up his hair. "Pussy Parker..."

As Peter watched Oscar disappear down the hallway, he got out his phone to text Ned.

_'I know the combination' -_ he texted. ' _Meet me at MJ's locker when school ends.'_

Ned replied almost instantly.

' _K dude :)'_

When classes had ended for that day, Peter waited outside MJ's locker for Ned. His own locker was only like a metre away from MJ's so at least he didn't look too suspicious.

He saw Ned approach him, smiling heavily.

"You got the code?" Ned exclaimed.

"Shhhhh!" Peter hissed.

Ned lowered his voice down to a whisper.

"Oscar gave you the code?" Ned said, with that ridiculous smile still on his face. "That's awesome. How did you even get to talk to him?"

"I've kind of learnt over the past couple of weeks how to talk to a bunch of those assholes..." Peter replied.

"This is actually quite cool..." Ned whispered. "It's like we're spies and we're investigating something."

"Okay Ned..." Peter said, laughing a little. "Just don't get too excited...and play it cool."

Ned watched as Peter focused on MJ's locker, carefully turning the dial.

'9...3...0...' he thought.

It opened and Ned's eyes widened in excitement.

Peter didn't know why his heart was beating so fast again. The world seemed to go quiet as his eyes scanned the inside of MJ's locker.

There were several drawings and doodles that she'd done in class, a photo of her and her dad when she was little, loads of random pencils and pens, some tampons, and a crumpled up piece of paper lying in the corner.

"There doesn't look like there's anything of substance in here..." Ned whispered, watching Peter reach into the back of MJ's locker and grab the piece of paper.

"What's that?" Ned exclaimed.

"Shut up!" Peter replied, in a harsh whisper.

Ned looked over Peter's shoulder as he opened up the piece of paper.

'432 Deerfield Street, Queens, NY, 11206'

"Fuck..." Peter muttered, under his breath. "It's just an address.

"So?" Ned said, looking at Peter. "That means we _go_ there."  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Peter wondered why he was not at home doing his Calculus homework, and why he and Ned were standing outside a random building, which was _supposed_ to be the address that they had found in MJ's locker.

It was starting to get really cold in New York now, and Peter and Ned were freezing, and debating whether they should even go in or not.

"But..." Peter said, squinting. "What even _is_ this place?"

"We won't find out until we go in..." Ned said, putting his hand on Peter shoulders. "And also, I'm freezing my ass off out here!"

Peter led the way, opening the a large glass door and shutting it behind them. They stood in what looked like a reception, and Peter saw people either at the main desk, or sitting down waiting to see someone. There were several rooms on the ground floor and more upstairs as well.

"Is this...some kind of hospital?" Ned whispered, closely walking behind Peter as they made their way in and sat on some chairs in the waiting area.

Peter was so confused. If this was a hospital, why weren't there any doctors or nurses walking around, and where were all the sick people?

He just kept thinking about MJ walking into that same place, and sitting down.

"Peter..." Ned said, picking up a flyer from the table in front of him. "Look at this..."

Peter took it from Ned and looked at it. It was a picture of the same building they were in, and another picture of a middle-aged woman with a short haircut.

"Esme Bracknell..." Peter read slowly and quietly from the flyer. "Local therapist in Queens."

"Holy shit..." Ned whispered. "That's probably it. MJ goes to therapy at this place."

Peter's heart sank. He knew that if MJ wasn't in school, and she was now seeing a therapist, then something must be wrong with her.

"This doesn't really answer any major questions though..." Peter said, grabbing the notebook he had written MJ's words on from his bag, and scribbling down more information in it.

"And if MJ finds out I came here..." Peter continued. "She'll fucking kill me. So we probably need to leave. Like now."

Ned nodded at Peter and they both stood up to leave when Peter felt Ned grab his arm abruptly and sit him back down.

"What are you doing?" Peter hissed, glancing at Ned, who's eyes were focused on something else.

"Look..." Ned said, realizing that someone had just walked through the door. "Isn't that Tyler?"

_Tyler?_ Peter thought.

He glanced over to the door and saw Tyler, dressed in jeans and a hoodie. He actually didn't look so sophisticated and intellectual anymore, and Peter figured losing his presidency must have really taken a toll on him. He still had a bruise on his face from where Peter punched him.

"What the fuck is he doing here?" Peter said quietly, as Tyler made eye contact with him.

Ned and Peter watched as Tyler spoke to someone on the phone. It sounded like he was talking to his dad. He ended the call after a few minutes, then proceeded to take the seat _right_ opposite Peter and Ned.

Peter wanted to die.

"So are you guys stalking me now?..." Tyler asked, leaning towards them.

Ned and Peter shook their heads simultaneously.

"No..." Peter said. "My...Aunt May is seeing someone and we're waiting for her. Dating...issues...and stuff..."

Tyler sighed and folded his arms.

"You're so retarded Parker..." he said. "And if you tell anyone...I mean _anyone_ , that you saw me here, I'll do more than just make your life a living hell."

Peter swallowed and looked at Ned who looked equally as terrified as Peter felt inside.

At that exact moment, a woman came out from one of the doors and called Tyler in. Tyler sighed again and stood up to follow her.  
Peter saw that he'd left most of his belongings on the chair he was sitting on - a bag that probably had his phone in it.

"Let's steal this guy's phone..." Ned said, under his breath.

"Are you crazy?" Peter retorted. "If he comes back and finds that his phone is gone, he's gonna _know_ that is was us."

"That's why we sync all his personal information onto this...." Ned said, pulling out a device from his bag that looked like a hard drive.

" _What?"_ Peter said.

"We're not gonna actually steal his phone..." Ned replied. "We're just gonna steal what's on it."

Peter smiled. If Ned could _actually_ make this work, then it could probably lead to more answers.

"When did you learn to do all this shit?" Peter asked.

"I've got a _lot_ of spare time..." Ned replied.  
Without trying to be noticed by too many people, Ned grabbed Tyler's bag from where he was sitting and pulled out his phone. He took out a lead from his own backpack and connected Tyler's phone to the hard drive.

"Quick Ned..." Peter said, anxious that Tyler was gonna come out at any second.

"Okay, I'm doing it..." Ned said, staring at Tyler's phone screen. "I'm not sure how much storage this thing has on it, but we'll have to see..."

Peter kept looking over Ned's shoulder, then back at the door Tyler went in, then over Ned's shoulder, then back at the door again.

"Is it done?" He asked Ned.

"It only went to about 58%..." Ned said, frowning at the phone screen.

"What does that _mean_?"

"It means that we don't have all the information...but we've got something. I'm gonna have to sift through all of it on my computer when I get home and-"

"Cool story bro..." Peter interrupted, standing up. "Right now, you need to put his phone back and we need to get the fuck out of here."

Ned nodded at Peter, and as soon as he returned Tyler's belongings, they both made a beeline for the door.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


It was eight o'clock in the evening and Peter had finally finished his Calculus homework. He found it really hard to concentrate on what he was doing, and he felt like he'd lost his ability to do basic algebra.

He was still waiting for Ned to text him and tell him what he found from the information on Tyler's phone.

Ever since Thanksgiving, he hadn't talked to MJ. He'd sent her a long text saying how sorry he was and apologizing to her, which she read, but hadn't replied to. He didn't even try to call her after that, assuming that she'd just ignore him.

All he wanted to do was spend more time with her. He wanted to get to know her even better - he wanted to be there for her, and he wanted to listen to her talk to him.

He hadn't realized it up until now, but MJ was _really_ cool. Cooler than any other girl who dressed to impress every day and went around gossiping about other people.

He sighed, before picking up his phone and dialling MJ's number.

It rang for like ten seconds, but then to Peter's amazement, she answered.

"Hey..." MJ's voice came onto Peter's phone and he was so glad to hear it. She didn't sound tired or stressed, which was a relief to him.

"MJ..." Peter said. "Did you get my message...I mean, I was just calling to see how you were doing."

"I'm okay today..." MJ replied. "My Dad thinks it's probably best for me to take another week off school...because of all my anxiety and stuff..."

Peter's heart sank again. The less time MJ spent at school meant the less time he could spend with her. He couldn't exactly explain to her that him and Ned had been investigating into what happened to her that night at Liz's party, and that they had raided her locker.

"And yes...I got your message, and I understand everything you were saying..." MJ continued. "And I know you would never intentionally try to hurt me...I'm...I'm sorry for screaming at you."

Peter was relieved.

"Do you mind...if I come over?..." he asked.

"No, I don't mind..." MJ replied. "We can finally watch that movie that we never got to watch."

"Okay..." Peter said, smiling. "I'll see you soon."

The walk to MJ's house was always a very short one. They had lived so close to each other their whole lives and now, Peter was really thankful for it. MJ's dad let him in, welcoming him nicely as usual. He'd brought movie snacks in  a bag that May had told him to bring, and was happy that they were no longer fighting, and would get some time alone.

He didn't knock on MJ's door this time, but opened it slightly, poking his head through the small gap he'd created.

MJ's room was as neat as ever. Her textbooks were open on her table, and it looked as if she had been doing some work earlier. She wasn't at her desk though, but was curled up in bed on her laptop.

"Peter?..." MJ said, sitting up. "It's okay, you can come in."

Peter came in and shut the door behind him. He didn't know whether to walk up to MJ and give her a hug, or whether to just hand her the snacks.

Her hair was wet as if she had just got out of the shower and she was in a T-shirt and shorts.

"Did you bring popcorn?" She asked him, as he sat on the edge of her bed.

"Popcorn and nachos and a bunch of other stuff..." Peter said, pulling the contents of the bag out.

"How was school?..." MJ asked, setting her laptop down beside her.

Peter's heart skipped a beat.

"Good..." he replied. "Ned and I are talking again, which I guess is nice."

MJ frowned at Peter for a second.

"You don't have to just sit there, Parker, you can get in with me..." MJ said, matter-of-factly.   
She pulled over her covers and tapped the space right next to her. Peter hesitated for a second before kicking off his shoes and climbing in. He'd didn't know why something felt so normal about this.

He put his arm around her shoulder and his head against hers. He could still smell the scent of her freshly shampooed hair and tea tree shower gel.

"What do you wanna watch?" MJ asked, bringing the laptop over to her lap. "Are you more of a horror or romantic comedy kind of guy?"

"I don't mind..." Peter said, smiling. "You choose."

"I know you want to watch a soppy rom com, Parker. So...rom com it is." She laughed, typing in her Netflix password and selecting a movie.

As the film played and Peter and MJ shared a bag of popcorn, he thought about how much he appreciated times like these, when they weren't trying to take off each other's clothes.

Peter loved how MJ laughed at almost every joke, and how she pointed out how oddly dressed some of the characters were, and how she said 'awww' sarcastically whenever something was too cheesy for her liking.

When the film ended, they both entered into a discussion about it.

"The main guy shouldn't have gone after her in the end..." Peter said, shaking his head. "It wasn't meant to be, and she was already about to board the plane."

"Peter, that's how rom coms end..." MJ said. "The guy has to get the girl or its over. And then they live happily ever after in a big house and have like ten kids."

"We should have just watched a horror movie..." Peter said, jokingly.

"You didn't like it?" MJ asked, turning to look at him. "It was so funny!"

She shut her laptop and put it on her beside table, before snuggling closer to Peter, who was  surprised that she didn't just want him to leave after that.

"Is _this_ a date?" Peter asked, tucking a strand of MJ's hair behind her ear.

MJ smiled.

"All we did was watch a movie, Parker. Don't get too comfortable..." she replied.

Peter moved closer to her so their cheeks were touching. Like when they were in the park in Boston - he wanted to stay in that moment forever.

He wanted to say so much to her.

_Do you....wanna be my girlfriend, MJ?_

That's all he had to say. But after last night, he was too scared of doing anything that might hurt her feelings. He was afraid she would make some sarcastic comment about how he was just a nice distraction, and nothing else. And the thought of losing her for good made him feel numb.

He wanted her to confide in him. To tell him everything she thought she couldn't say.

"Peter?" MJ whispered.

"Yeah?" He replied, his eyes looking up at the ceiling.

"I'm sorry about thanksgiving ."

"We don't have to have sex, MJ-"

"No, not just that.", she said turning towards him, so she was looking at him, her head on the pillow. "The way I was acting...it's not me."

"What do you mean?" Peter said, looking up at the ceiling. "It's okay, MJ. You don't have to be tough all the time. You can cry, you can _act_ how you like. You can say what you feel. You can tell me anything."

There was a silence. So long, that Peter started to wonder if what he said was just stupid. He wondered what was going through her mind.

He was relieved when he felt her head move to his chest. He wished she would know that he loved every bit about her. He even loved it when she was vulnerable.

"Can you stay for a bit?" MJ finally said, putting her arm across his body.

"Yeah..." Peter nodded.

The truth is that he didn't want to leave her. He didn't want to have to leave her there without him. He knew that he was one of her few sources of comfort.

He watched as her eyes closed and she drifted off to sleep, still breathing against him. He saw how fragile she looked as she slept, and how her curls fell over her face.

He drifted off too, but then woke up a few hours later. MJ was still sleeping, and he checked his watch. It was 1 o'clock in the morning.

May would probably be wondering where the hell he was, and he was so desperate to get back home and call Ned to see if he had found anything out about Tyler.

He sat up and gently moved MJ so that she was resting on her pillow. He climbed out of her bed quietly and put the covers over her.

He wanted to find out what happened to her, he thought. And if she wasn't going to tell him, then that was okay. As long as he knew she was safe with him.

He kissed her on the forehead, then as silently as he could, he crept out of her room, down the stairs and out of her house.

He switched on his phone to loads of messages from May asking him where he was and what time he was gonna be back. There were also five missed calls from Ned.

As he walked back into his apartment, he saw May on the kitchen table working on her computer. She sometimes did that.

She took one look at him and then sighed heavily.

"Peter Benjamin Parker..." she sighed. "Where have you been?"

"I was at MJ's house..." Peter said, heading towards his room. "We were watching a movie and we kinda just...fell asleep."

"Just tell me where you're going next time, okay?" MJ said, looking worried.

"I will..." Peter said, walking past her and entering his room. "I will, May. I'm sorry."

He shut the door behind him and immediately sat at his desk, swinging round in his chair and dialling Ned's number.

"Please pick up..." he muttered to himself.

"Hello?..." Ned's tired and slightly irritated voice came onto the phone. "Ugh...Peter...do you know what time it is?"

"Ned..." Peter said. "Did you sift through the information? What did you find out about Tyler?"

"Oh, the file..." Ned began, yawning. "Yeah, most of the files got corrupted and like, deleted themselves."

"Are you fucking kidding me?" Peter said, closing his eyes in disbelief.

"But I got like..." Ned continued. " _One_ message that Tyler received on his group chat. The one with some of his other senior friends on it. I don't know who the person who sent it was, but it was sent the day after Liz's party. On the Sunday.

"What did it say?" Peter asked, impatiently.

"I haven't opened it yet...hold on I need to get onto my computer."

Peter rolled his eyes again.

"Fuck, Ned. Seriously?" he muttered.

"Sorry..." Ned replied. "I'm logging on to my computer now. I need to open the file again."

"What. Does. It. Say _?"_ Peter asked again, pressing his phone against his ear.

Peter felt like the world was spinning a bit. He didn't know if it was because he was tired or if he was kind of nervous to hear what the message said.

"Yeah I got it..." Ned said.

"Read it out" Peter demanded.

"It says 'we need to get Andrew on MJ's good side. He needs to befriend her'".

" _What?"_ Peter asked, confused.

"That's what it says..." Ned said.

Peter's mind was doing somersaults. _Who_ sent that message, and why did Andrew need to get on MJ's good side?

"This could explain why Andrew started getting closer to MJ..." Peter said to Ned after a long pause.

"But why?" Ned asked. "Maybe...he was trying to cover up for someone."

Peter sighed.

"I need to talk to Andrew..."

 


	7. Ass Kisser

_I'm having a few friends over for game night- I'd love for you to come, Parker. MJ.'_

Peter wasn't sure why he felt so weird. Maybe it was the fact that he was pretty sure MJ had just friend-zoned him _._ Or maybe it was because she hadn't showed up to school for the past few days. Or maybe it was because Peter knew he should talk to Andrew but everyday, he sat with Ned at lunch, and everyday, he chickened out.

He would take one look at Andrew, usually laughing his head off or paying no attention to the conversation at the senior table. And there was not a bone in his body that could muster up the courage to confront him. And say what he thought he wanted to say.

So he hadn't.

And now, MJ was inviting him over for 'game night' and of course he wanted to go _._

_'Sure, I'll be there.'_ He texted back.  
  
  
  


When Peter got to MJ's house, he wasn't surprised to see Ned sitting at her dinner table.

There were so many different games on the table - Jenga, Trivial Pursuit, Twister - you name it - MJ had it.

Peter was welcomed in by MJ's Dad. He started to wonder if MJ really wanted to have people over or if this was another one of her Dad's plans to get her to socialize and 'talk' to people.

After all, he _did_ find out a few days ago that she had been seeing a therapist - yet another thing she was lying to him about.

"You made it, Parker!" MJ said, walking up to the door.

She gave Peter a quick hug. Her curly hair had been braided into a single plait and she was wearing a white T-shirt and some burgundy dungarees.

"You look cute." Peter said.

"I know. Lol." MJ said, as Peter followed her to the table, taking a seat next to Ned.

"Hey, Man." Ned said to Peter, before they performed their little handshake.

"Oh Lord, help me out tonight." MJ sighed, looking up at the ceiling.

"What?" Ned shrugged, adjusting his black baseball cap. "It's _cool._ "

Peter didn't know why Ned wore hats inside, in fact, it kind of pissed him off. But he wasn't going to say anything - of course.

"Cool, my _ass_." MJ laughed, her Dad passing her a few drinks from the fridge.

"Well, I'll be upstairs if you need anything" he said, before giving MJ a kiss on the cheek. "Love, ya."

"Okay..." MJ said, embarrassed. "Bye."

She watched her Dad go upstairs then placed the drinks on the table carefully, before sliding into the seat opposite Peter.

There was an empty chair next to MJ.

"Now tell me - was this your idea?" Peter asked MJ, looking down at all the games.

"No." MJ said. "But I might as well make the best of it."

She grabbed a canned pink lemonade and cracked it open.

"So...are we gonna play?" Ned asked, pushing his glasses up his nose.

Peter grabbed a pink lemonade too.

"In a second." MJ said, taking a sip. "We've gotta wait for Andrew."

Peter froze, his mouth literally gaping open.

"You alright there, Parker?" MJ smiled.

"Please tell me you have a cousin called Andrew or something." He said.

"No, it's  Andrew Richardson. From school. Senior Andrew-"

"Douchey Andrew. Stupid haircut Andrew. Andrew - let's push him off a bridge - Andrew?" Peter continued.

"What's your problem, Peter?" Ned said, rolling his eyes.

Peter stared at Ned. He couldn't believe that Ned was taking MJ's side. After all he had _told_ Ned about Andrew.

"Yeah, Peter. He's a chilled guy." MJ said. "My Dad told me to invite my friends - and he's one of them-"

"Please tell me _one_ friendly thing he's done for you. Enlighten me MJ, because I'm really struggling here." Peter said.

MJ leant back in her chair.

"I don't have time for your bullshit, Peter."  She muttered.

"He's a _jerk!"_ Peter shouted. "Are you serious?"

"Shut up, Peter!" Ned exclaimed. "This is MJ's house and she can invite who she wants..."

There was a silence. Peter wanted to shove Ned so hard, but he was kind of right.

He'd been wanting to talk to Andrew all week, and MJ's house was literally the _last_ place that he's thought he would see him in.

MJ didn't look up at Peter again. He was mad at himself for making _her_ mad.

Before things could get any more awkward, the doorbell rang. MJ stood up to get it, still not even looking at Peter once.

The door opened and there was Andrew. He made MJ look small, and he was wearing a white shirt and black sweats. He pulled her into a hug. Peter was so fucking confused.

"Hey girl, how ya doing?" Andrew said.

"Alright, I guess." MJ replied, closing the door behind him.

"This is literally my first 'all Juniors' event of the semester. I feel _honored_ to be here." Andrew laughed, glancing over at Ned and Peter, before turning back to MJ. "My mom wanted to give your Dad some rosé."

"I'm sure he'll be thrilled." MJ laughed.

Peter felt his blood starting to boil. Why were they acting so familiar with each other? Why the _fuck_ did she invite him? He wanted to scream all these thoughts out loud but he knew it was better he said nothing at all.

Andrew sat next to MJ.

"Hey Ned." Andrew said, bumping fists with Ned.

"Pussy Parker." Andrew said, raising his fist, expecting Peter to bump it. "I wish I'd watermarked that name. The whole school stole it from me."

Peter didn't want to look at him. He didn't want to _bump_ his fist. He wanted to push him over in the playground, like a little kindergartener.

"What do you guys wanna start with?" MJ said, completely ignoring all the tension in the room.

Andrew got out a speaker and phone from his pocket and began playing some Drake off Spotify.

"Umm..." Andrew stammered, sorting through the pile of games.

Peter didn't move. He hated the way Andrew's hand would occasionally touch MJ's and how he kept on making her laugh.

Ned also laughed too, which made Peter even more mad.

"Jenga it is..." Andrew said, tipping over the tower perfectly stacked unto the table.

Ned went first. Then Andrew. Then MJ.

"Peter, your turn." MJ said, finally acknowledging Peter.

He looked up at her. He didn't even know what to _think_. He was hurt. How could she invite somebody who she knew he hated?

Peter pulled out a block of wood and the whole tower nearly tipped over.

"Woah, that was a close one dude." Andrew said, steadying the tower.

Peter wanted him to shut up.

Ned, Andrew, MJ, Peter. Ned, Andrew, MJ, Peter. Then Ned pulled out a piece and the whole thing came crashing down.

"Shit!" Ned shouted, standing up suddenly.   
"Ugh, I totally should have gone for the one next to it."

"Nothing you could have done - it was gonna fall anyways." Andrew said.

_Shut up,_ Peter thought.

Then they moved on to 'Uno.' Peter lost every round. Mainly, because he wasn't concentrating and never shouted Uno when he had one card. Andrew would always shout it before him and he would reluctantly have to pick up two more.

MJ won nearly every round. Andrew kept complimenting her on her game skills. MJ kept saying thank you. Peter wanted Andrew to shut up.

As Ned was about to open up the box of Pictionary, MJ's Dad came half way down the stairs.

"MJ, the guy delivering the Chinese food has got lost, somewhere. Do you think you could go get him? He said he's in front of our house ringing our doorbell, but clearly not."

"Sure!" MJ called to her Dad. She got up and began to put on her adidas shoes, tying up her shoelaces.

"Thanks, baby." MJ's Dad called back, disappearing back upstairs.

"Do you-" both Peter and Andrew said at the same time.

"No, go on Peter." Andrew said.

"Um...would you like me to come help you with the food?" Peter asked MJ.

"Neither of you have jackets." MJ said, not even looking at Peter. "It's literally freezing out there. Ned, grab yours. Let's go."

"Uh...sure." Ned said, grabbing his jacket off the end of the couch on the other side of the living room.

The same couch Peter nearly had sex with MJ on, Peter thought.

Now he was going to be left alone with Andrew.

And he wasn't too sure whether it was a good thing or a bad thing. But Ned had already closed the door behind them and reality set in.  
Before Peter, could say anything, Andrew already had.

"What's your problem with me, dude?" Andrew asked Peter, leaning back on his chair and crossing his arms.

Peter didn't want to say anything to him at first. This guy wasn't worth wasting his breath on, he thought. But he _did_ say something.

"Everything." Peter said. "I don't even know where to fucking start. Maybe it's your horrible attitude. The way you treat Freshmen and Sophmores. Or maybe it's the way you tried to have sex with Liz, who was wasted-"

"I actually-"

"No, let me finish!" Peter shouted, getting louder and louder. "Or maybe it's the way you _bully_ people. Or maybe it's because you're vain and you're conceited. Andrew, just go to hell."

Andrew's eyes widened. Peter was breathing heavily now, pushing his curls out of his face, furiously.

"I didn't have sex with Liz." Andrew said.

"Bullshit!" Peter shouted.

"No - it's not bullshit!" Andrew shouted back.   
"Nothing happened. Liz and I literally just talked...and then..."

"Then what?" Peter snapped.

"Dude, you need to calm the _fuck_ down."   
Andrew said, dropping his voice down and leaning into Peter. "I opened the door to the shed and MJ was just standing there. Then after we talked and stuff...Liz told me to take MJ upstairs."

Peter's heart was beating now.

"You know, MJ's a pretty cool girl." Andrew said. "We were laughing and talking about stupid shit that I can't really remember- we were both a bit drunk. We went upstairs, into one of the guest bedrooms...and then we were kissing, and I kind of thought, shit, she actually wants to have sex with me."

Peter looked away for a second. This was so fucking crazy. How had all of this information just been left out of every conversation that he had with MJ so far?

"So I told her I didn't have a condom." Andrew continued. "And then I told her I was going to go and get one. From Tyler or Emily or someone, I can't remember. I was so drunk, I don't really remember that much. But I left. And that's it."

"No, it's not.." Peter mumbled.

"Yes it is." Andrew said, firmly. "I didn't fuck Liz. I didn't fuck MJ. I didn't have sex with anyone that night. I left the room, Tyler handed me more booze-"

"Tyler?"

"Yes, Tyler. He handed me some vodka and that was it. Apparently, I sort of started making out with other girls and then I passed out...I don't know. I woke up with this other Junior on top of me."

Peter closed his eyes quickly, trying to make sense of it all.

"Wait, but...MJ had sex with _someone._ " Peter said. "Everyone was saying she got laid-"

"Well you tell me, Peter." Andrew laughed. "Cuz I don't fucking know who it is."

"What the _fuck?_ " Peter sighed, confused. "Everyone in school was making it out like you guys had sex."

"Well, it's high school Peter. And I didn't mind it - I'd rather people thought I got laid than I hadn't. If you don't believe me, ask MJ. We literally _talked_ about that. Who cares if people thought we'd fucked? It only made us more popular. And it gave me an excuse to talk to MJ-"

"Wait, who told you to talk to MJ?"

Before Andrew could say anything, Peter heard the door unlock. MJ and Ned were back, with bags of Chinese in their hands.

"That man is so freakin dumb." MJ laughed.

"He was at the pet store down the street, just knocking on the door...and me and Ned were like, what the fuck are you doing?"

Peter had so many questions, still. So, did Andrew actually care about MJ? Was he actually defending her online? Who told him to make an effort with MJ and _why?_ That was not exactly how he had expected that conversation to go. Deep down, he wanted Andrew to confess something horrible and sick, so he could beat Andrew up and call him every swear word under the sun.

But instead...Andrew was pretty innocent.

_What. The. Fuck._

They took a break to eat some Chinese and watched some TV. Peter kept looking over at Andrew. He watched as MJ would lean over and whisper things to him and he would laugh, and it honestly made him feel so pathetic that he cared.

But he did.

Then it was back to games, which Peter could hardly concentrate on. They played Pictionary. MJ asked to pair up with Peter and he said yes but they lost, because half of the time, Peter stood there silent while MJ was drawing something instead of trying to figure out what it was.

"Come on, Parker!" MJ groaned, after Ned and Andrew had gained their seventh point.

"Seven-nil." Ned laughed. "Should we play something else?"

And they did. Much to Peter's dismay.

They tried out some Twister and Peter fell over about five hundred times. He just wasn't finding anything funny, even when Ned fell over and knocked him and MJ over and everyone was in hysterics for about ten minutes. He just couldn't find it funny.

Inside of him was a voice, screaming at himself to just let it go and enjoy the night. Maybe he was wrong. Maybe nothing happened to MJ.

At the end of the night, Peter was sure they had played every game underneath the sun. He was pretty sure he could get a degree in the art of not having fun because that's all he was doing all night.

"Thanks so much for inviting me, MJ. That was dope." Ned said, hugging MJ.

"You're welcome. Nerd." She laughed.

MJ's Dad came bounding down the stairs.

"Andrew..." He said, looking at Andrew who had grabbed his phone and speaker, getting ready to say goodbye to MJ. "Uh, your mom texted me. Do you want me to read your college essay and give you some notes? I used to work in admissions at Stanford...so I could give you some tips."

"That would be amazing, Mr Jones. You don't mind?" Andrew replied.

"No, not at all. Have a seat. I'll get my laptop." MJ's Dad said, turning to go back upstairs.

_Really?_ Peter thought.

Now him and Ned would have to leave. And MJ would be alone with Andrew and her Dad.

MJ walked up to Peter and hugged him quickly. Peter couldn't tell if she was mad or not.

"Thanks for tonight." Peter said.

He could hardly look her in the eye.

MJ just nodded, opening the door for him and Ned. And then they were outside.

"Damn, that was so fun." Ned said to Peter as they walked home.

Peter wondered if he should even bother telling Ned about the conversation he had with Andrew. But then he did. He told him everything.

"Okay...wow." Ned said, shoving his hands in his pockets. "What the hell do we do now?"

"I don't know." Peter sighed.

They were pretty much silent all the way to Peter's apartment. Ned said he wanted to come in for a 'few snacks' but Peter knew that by the time Ned was done, there would be literally no food left in the fridge.

"I just don't get it." Peter sighed, crashing on the couch. "I really thought they had sex."

"Peter...no offense..." Ned mumbled, his face stuffed with crisps. "But why do you care so much? And who cares if they did? All we wanted to know was if Andrew did anything shady, but clearly he didn't or MJ wouldn't be kissing his ass-"

"She's not kissing his ass." Peter lied.

"She's _literally_ kissing his ass." Ned repeated.

Peter rolled his eyes, standing up.

"Well, you know what _was_ shady?" Peter said, turning to face Ned ."You defending Andrew."

Ned dipped his hand back into the bag of chips.

"Peter..." Ned said. "He didn't do anything wrong-"

"But he's a fucking dick!" Peter shouted. "Am I the only one seeing that?"

The room to May's door swung open and Aunt May walked out, folding her arms.

"Peter, watch your profanity." She said, her voice steady and angry. Peter hated it when she talked in that tone. "Where the _hell_ have you been?"

"MJ's house." Peter sighed. "It's not a big deal-"

"No, Peter Benjamin Parker, it _is_ a big deal!" May shouted. "You promised me you would tell me where you were going. Just drop me a text, at least! I was worried sick about you-"

"May, Ned was there with me." Peter retorted.   
"We were literally just sitting in MJ's house playing games."

Peter gestured towards Ned. Ned just stood there.

"Um..." Ned said, awkwardly placing the bag of chips down on the counter. "I....I have to get back home."

"Ok." May sighed. "See ya, Ned."

Ned shuffled out, his shoes squeaking on the floor and May shut the door behind him. Peter sighed, before opening his mouth to defend himself.

"Look, May-"

"Peter, be quiet!" May shouted. "I promised Ben...and your Mom, and your Dad, that I would take care of you, and that's _exactly_ what I'm going to do! You are no longer just going to show up at whatever time you want or leave without even telling me where the hell you're going!"

"May!" Peter shouted, walking towards her. "That's so unfair, I've really done nothing wrong!"

"Peter, just say you're sorry for once!" May exclaimed. "Instead of talking back to me-"

"But I have _nothing_ to apologize for!"

May looked taken aback.

"That's right - you're grounded." She said.

"May!" Peter shouted, again.

"I don't wanna hear it, Peter. You are grounded for two weeks. You are not going to leave this house, except for school, and you come straight back!"

"Please-"

"It's three weeks now!" May shouted, pacing about. "And it'll be four weeks if you keep talking back to me - get to your room!"

Peter felt weak. He hated when she shouted at him, and he didn't think she had ever gotten this mad at him before.

"I hate you." He muttered, walking into his room and slamming the door behind him.   
He put his back to the door, and placed his hands in his hair. Then he punched the door with his fist.

He didn't want to answer any of his text messages from Ned or MJ. He didn't care what they were.

He just wanted to disappear for a second.

He lay his back down on his bed, drying his cheek with his sleeves. He thought about everything that happened that night.

Did nothing that had happened between him and MJ mean anything to her? He thought about when she fell asleep on his chest. He really thought he could ask her to be his girlfriend after that. He now thought he was stupid for ever thinking that.

What did she _see_ in Andrew? Peter thought. He didn't understand.

Peter took of his clothes till he was just in his boxer shorts. It was freezing outside, but for some reason, he felt really hot.

All he kept thinking about was MJ. What was she doing? What was she thinking about him? Was she even thinking about him at all?

He got ready for bed then got underneath his duvet. There was no way he was going to sleep.

Peter hadn't slept much in the last few weeks.

He opened his phone to see the messages displayed on his lock screen.

_MJ:_   
_'Why were you acting so weird tonight Peter?'_   
_'Fine. Don't answer.'_

_Ned:_   
_'Bro, I hope everything went okay with May. She seemed mad.'_   
_'Andrew's really a good guy.'_

He just locked his phone and placed it on his bedside table. He heard his door slightly open and May walking in. He pretended to be asleep.

"Peter." May said, shaking him. "Peter."

Peter opened his eyes too quickly.

May sighed.

"I'm going for my night shift. I've left the keys with you, just incase of an emergency, but you _are_ grounded so I'm not expecting you to go anywhere _."_ She said. "I know you're mad at me...but you'll understand when you grow up and have your own kids."

_You're not my Mom,_ he thought.

Then she left, closing his bedroom door quietly behind her _._ Peter heard her letting herself out of the front door.

He felt so helpless. At that moment, there was nothing more than he wanted to do than not be stuck there in that stupid apartment. In his tiny bedroom.

He sat up, switching on the light to his room, and began looking for some clothes to wear.  
He didn't even know where he wanted to go yet, he just didn't want to be there. He wanted to go somewhere and be back before May noticed. He wanted to do something _right_.

Peter put on some sweats and a white hoodie- which he knew was always a mistake, but it was literally the only clean thing in his closet.

He slipped on his socks, then his trainers. Then he stuck his earphones in his ears and turned up the music till it was deafening.

He was humming, waiting for Aunt May to be far away from the apartment block so he could go outside.

Then he got up and left. He felt weird in the elevator- all he could think about was MJ with her red lipstick on, standing next to him.

He thought about how badly he wanted her that night. He thought about how badly he wanted her _now_.

He _thought_ about calling MJ. Maybe even just showing up at her house. But the subject of Andrew was a touchy subject - one that he had not fully come to terms with and one that he refused to address, especially in front of MJ.

So Peter just put his hood up, shoved his hands in his pockets and began walking down the block.

He had his wallet with only about 20 dollars in it and his fake ID...that was about it. He knew of a club that all the Midtown High students got illegal access into, so that's where he was naturally walking to.

His phone rang. It was MJ. Peter ignored it.

When he arrived at the club, the bouncer took one look at him and sighed.

"You're not twenty one..." He said to Peter, in a deep, croaky voice.

Peter brought out his fake ID that claimed his name was Jason. And that he was 23.

The bouncer tutted.

"Alright, Jason..." He said, gesturing toward the door. "What's your date of birth?"

"17th April 1995." Peter lied.

The bouncer sighed before, handing Peter back his ID, then pushing the door open for him.

At that point, the music was so loud that he was forced to take off his earphones. Did he have a plan? Not really. He guessed he was going to buy as many drinks as twenty dollars could buy and try and forget about how big of a fuck up he was.

He ignored all the bright lights. All the young girls and older men, making out and grinding on each other. The stripper on the pole who looked directly at him. He ignored all that and went straight to the bar, sliding unto the bar stool.

"One gin and tonic please." Peter said, in as much of a I'm-not-seventeen voice as he could muster.

The bar tender didn't say anything, took his money and began making his drink. Suddenly, Peter was really thirsty.

He took one sip and the burst of alcohol was so refreshing. It sharpened his senses, refreshed his mind and calmed his nerves.

He just sat there sipping, until he heard a voice behind him.

"Peter?"

He turned around. Liz.

_Liz._

She was wearing a short black dress, cut out in the middle, giving Peter a glance of her perfectly symmetrical boobs.

"Liz?" He said, as she took a seat next to him. "What are you doing here?"

"What do you mean?" She said, pushing a strand of her sleek, black hair behind her ear.

"My older brother owns this place. I get free drinks. Of course I'm here."

The bar tender handed her a mojito, almost instantly.

"So, you came here alone?" He asked, finishing his drink, before asking for another one.

"No, I came here with my brother. But God knows where _he_ is." She sighed.

Peter looked at her. Her legs seemed to go on forever.

"I feel like we haven't really talked since my party." She said. "How are you?"

"Good." Peter lied. "How's college applications?"

"I find out if I get into Harvard...next week....just getting ready to take the L."

"Well, good luck." Peter said, as the bartender handed him another drink.

"Let's go to the VIP room." Liz said. "It's _way_ less crowded."

Peter assumed that she could get him into this VIP room, and she did. Just by linking arms with him and claiming her brother was good friends with Peter.

The VIP room was coated in a red lighting, with red leather couches, sprawled around.

There was even a ping pong table. And it was nearly empty, apart from an older man and one of the strippers, smoking next to the exit.

Liz grabbed Peter's free arm and pulled him to sit on one of the couches, out of view of the other people in the room.

_"_ So, what's going on with you Peter? Are you with MJ now?" She asked.

"Nah." Peter said, finishing off his drink in one big gulp.

Yep, he was definitely kind of drunk now.

"And how was sex with Maya?" Liz laughed.

"Good, I guess." Peter said, barely focusing.

"Yeah, she doesn't stop talking about it..."

Peter felt uncomfortable.

"Well...what did she say?" Peter asked.

"Um..." Liz said, sipping her mojito. "That you're good with you're hands, I dunno."

Peter knew that she knew.

He bit his lip. He was so out of his own mind right now. He thought of Andrew going into MJ's bedroom and taking off those dungarees he thought were cute. And touching her in places he hadn't got round to yet.

Liz moved up to him on the couch. The look in her eyes was so dangerous.

"Liz, we're not gonna do anything here..." Peter muttered.

_"_ Shut up, Peter." She said, lifting her hand carefully and placing it underneath his tracksuit and down his boxers.

It all happened so fast that Peter didn't realize what was she doing.

He let out a huge groan, partly because her hands were so cold.

"Shhh!" Liz hissed, laughing now. "Relax."

Peter leaned back on the couch, an expression of confusion and pleasure on his face. He blew his curls out of his face.

It seemed to go on forever and Liz was just looking at him, laughing the whole way through. She seemed to enjoy massaging every inch of him. Peter tried not to make any sounds, but it was extremely challenging. His breath just got deeper and his heart was beating faster and faster, and when it was over, he let out a huge sigh.

"Fuck, my hands are tired." Liz said, leaning back down on the couch with Peter.

"Why did you do that?" He panted, his head spinning.

"I owe it to you." She said. "There's nothing between us-"

"What...you....what?" Peter stammered, confused.

"I just _do_ , okay. And it's because there's something you don't know. That I know. That you'll never know." She whispered.

She tried to get up but Peter held unto her arm.

"Liz, Liz, Liz." He said, sitting up. He felt as though he was going to fall over.

He shouldn't have drank that second drink so fast.

"What, Peter?" Liz hissed.

"You have to tell me.." He said.

"Peter, forget I said that." Liz said, sitting down again. "Forget I said anything at all."

Peter's heart was still beating. He was trying to process everything she just said and the fact that she had just given him a hand job in the middle of a club.

Peter sighed.

Liz handed him her drink.

"Finish it." She said.

"I have to walk back home." Peter moaned.

"You know you want to."

_Peer pressure at its finest,_ Peter thought.

Peter finished off Liz's drink in a matter of second _._

"Fuck. That was a shitty idea." He said, putting a hand on his head.

Peter looked over at Liz- she looked a little bit blurry to him now.

"What?" He thought he heard her say. "Peter, stop looking so horny."

"I'm not....I....shit..." Peter stuttered.

He good barely process his words.

"May is going to be so fucking mad at me." He said.

"What the fuck? Who the fuck is May?" Liz asked Peter.

He didn't reply. He could feel his head thumping in his chest, in his head, in his calves.

He impulsively leaned into kiss Liz. He kissed her lips and she didn't kiss him back.

"What the _fuck_ are you doing Peter!" She shouted.

Liz slapped him.Peter felt her cold fingers collide against his cheek. It only began to sting a few seconds later.

"Sort yourself out, Peter." Liz said, behind gritted teeth, before standing up and leaving.

"Wait, Liz-" Peter said, standing up to follow her.

His knees gave in and he fell to the floor. He closed his eyes. All he could hear was the sound of his own voice. Of Aunt May's voice screaming at him.

He was _so_ fucked.

He crouched back down by the couch.

_Sober up_ he thought. _If you pass out, there'll be no MJ there to save your ass._

 


	8. A Coincidence

_There's something that you don't know. That I know. That you'll never know._

Peter's ears were ringing and he could feel the alcohol burning up his throat. It was a battle for him to keep his eyes open. He kept planning the route out of that place and back into his apartment in his head, but his body wouldn't seem to _move._

_Come on Peter, get up,_ he thought.

Slowly, he pushed himself upwards until he was sitting up, but then crouched back down again as he felt himself about to vomit.

He gritted his teeth and shut his eyes for a second. He couldn't throw up now, he _couldn't_ pass out. If May found him like this or even worse, didn't find him at home at all, he couldn't even imagine the consequences.

He pushed himself up for a second time and sat upright. Everything was spinning. The ringing in his ears continued and it was like the music kept getting louder and louder.

He stood up, feeling blood rushing to his brain, then held onto the side of a table to steady himself.

Every time he put one foot in front of the other, it was like his whole body ached. He staggered towards the entrance of the VIP room and looked out.

His vision of brightly coloured flashing lights and figures dancing was completely blurred now, as he tried to make his way through the crowd. He was bumping into people continuously and feeling their sweat on his own body.

As he passed the bar, he could just make out the door that led outside, and his escape. Even though it was normally so close, Peter's drunk mind felt like it was a mile away.

He staggered aimlessly towards the door, tripping and falling over someone's leg in the process.

"Watch where you're _going_..." he heard a woman's voice say to him.

He groaned again from the sheer shock of landing on the hard wooden floor, and the constant pounding of his head.

_Get up, Peter,_ he thought again.

He scrambled off the floor and flailed his arms around until he could feel the door handle against his hand. It felt extremely cold.

With all the strength left in his body, he pushed the door open and felt the icy New York air practically attack his face. Then he felt about ten times more sick than he did in the club.

His saw a nearby garbage can with his blurry vision and then began to throw up in it. He felt like he had felt that night at Liz's party, but a little worse. There was no MJ to rub his back and tell him he was fine. There was no MJ to push his curls out of his face as he puked.   
There was no MJ to put a cold towel against his head when he was finished.

_I need to get home,_ Peter thought.

He scanned the streets for any cars or vehicles rushing by, and since it was like 2am, he was lucky that there weren't, and that the chances of him becoming roadkill were pretty low.

So Peter walked, _slowly,_ all the way home. He was so drunk that the pace he was going at still made him pant horrendously and still made his heart race. He kept telling himself not to pass out on the sidewalk. He kept telling himself to keep going. He kept promising himself that he would never do something as _stupid_ as what he had just done ever again, and he would never put another insane amount of poisonous liquid in his body.

Peter was relieved to see his block of apartments in front of him. He let himself in, and made his way over to the elevator, pressing a few of the wrong buttons but finally arriving on his floor.

"Twenty three..." he kept mumbling to himself, trying to retain the number of his apartment in his head.

"Nineteen..." he said quietly to himself, his voice shaking badly. "Twenty...twenty one...twenty two...twenty three."

He got out the keys from his pocket and opened the door, his hands shaking throughout all of it.

He hoped and prayed that May wouldn't be home, and thankfully she wasn't.

He knew he had to get in the shower and he had to get in the shower _now._

He stumbled to the bathroom and shut the door behind him, locking it. He was still panting heavily. His ears were still ringing, and he felt as if he was completely blind as he yanked his hoodie off his head and pulled down his sweats.

He kept replaying the scenario of Liz in his head. Liz leading him into the VIP room. Liz jerking him off. Him trying to kiss Liz. Liz slapping him in the face.

He managed to take off the rest of his clothes before climbing into the shower and fumbling with the temperature dial to make sure he didn't give himself a second degree burn. He turned the dial all the way to the right and let freezing cold water hit his face and body, in the hope that it would wake him up more.

His legs felt so weak and he couldn't stand in the shower for long, so he just backed into a corner and sat down.

After sitting there for about ten minutes, he managed to hoist himself back up again and turn the shower off. He felt slightly more awake now but still incredibly dizzy. He reached out to grab his towel and wrapped it around the lower half of his body, then proceeded to brush his teeth. His toothpaste made him want to gag but he persevered, and stumbling out of the bathroom, he made his way back into his room.

He shut the door behind him and went over to his closet to grab some clean pajamas, before pulling them on slowly. Then he crept into bed, and passed the fuck out.  
  
  
  
  


"Today we're going to be talking about Nuclear Physics..." Mr Davies said, writing the title on a whiteboard and underlining it.

It was the day after Peter's eventful night at the club, and he could barely concentrate. It had been an actual mission for him to get out of bed that morning. May had returned home from her night shift, hours after Peter had gone to sleep, and didn't suspect anything. He was lucky to be alive and not lying in a ditch somewhere.

He glanced over to the empty desk in front of him where MJ always used to sit. They would always pass each other notes, most of them being MJ telling Peter how hot Mr Davies was, and Peter replying how that was disgusting, and MJ asking Peter for help with various questions, and Peter telling her which equations to use.

There was actually a time when she would sit in that desk in front of him and everything was normal. She was her occasional stand-offish, bitchy self...but she was MJ.

This was not the MJ Peter knew now. It wasn't the girl who had panic attacks and couldn't _do_ sex. It wasn't the girl who didn't show up to school, and it wasn't the girl who liked Andrew.

_Andrew,_ he thought.

Peter had been such a dick to him last night, only to find out that he was completely innocent, and that him and MJ were going around, lying to everyone that they had slept together.

He thought he might have been one step closer to finding out what _might_ have happened to MJ at Liz's party, but now he was back to square one. Now, he didn't even see the point of searching any further.

Mr Davies put down Peter's mid-term paper in front of him.

"Not as high as you would have probably liked Peter..." he said, shrugging. "But good job anyway."

Peter looked down in front of him. He'd gotten an 85.

_An 85?_ he thought. Right there in front of him was an A minus and he could basically kiss his 4.0 GPA goodbye.

He didn't even want to turn over the paper and learn from his mistakes. He just wanted to shred it and forget that he had ever taken the stupid mid-term.

All of a sudden, the classroom door opened slightly. The whole class practically turned their heads over to look at who was coming in.

"MJ?" a girl who was sat in front said. "You're back."

MJ shrugged, forcing a smile, and Peter looked at her. She was wearing a Stanford merchandise hoodie and black jeans. Her hair was tied up into a messy bun, and Peter noticed that she was wearing a little bit of makeup.

"MJ..." Mr Davies said. "Welcome back, take a seat. I'm just handing back the mid-terms."

Peter was so confused. What made MJ decide to come back today of all days?

MJ nodded, ignoring all the stares directed towards her. She placed her bag down by her seat and slid into her desk, looking down at her paper and getting out a pen.

As Mr Davies continued to drone on about Nuclear Physics, Peter continued to stare at MJ. She hadn't spoken to anyone so far and was just scribbling down notes, looking up at the board and resting her chin on her hand.

When he heard the bell ring and class ended, he was so relieved, because he wanted to talk her. She was walking alone and heading to her locker so he followed her.

"MJ...wait..." Peter said, as she opened her locker and put some more textbooks back into it.

"What do you want, Parker?" She said, not even looking up at him. She sounded angry, Peter thought.

He sighed.

"How did you do...on the mid-term?" He asked, not really caring that much but wanting to hold her in conversation.

MJ looked back up at him, after getting her books for her next class and slamming her locker.

"I got a 97..." she said, laughing a little, which made Peter kind of uncomfortable. "Happy?"

"I got an 85..." Peter said, rubbing the back of his neck with his hand.

"Great..." MJ said, in a blank tone. "I kicked your ass in Physics for once."

"Why are you in school today?" Peter asked, shaking his head.

"Why were you being such a _dick_ yesterday?" MJ replied, her words slow and pronounced.

"I thought..." Peter stammered. "I thought Andrew-"

Peter didn't get to finish his sentence because Andrew had walked up to where they were standing, and put an arm around MJ.

"You okay?" He said to her, giving Peter a side eye.

"Yeah, I am..." MJ said, re-adjusting her books in her hands.

"Is Peter bothering you?" Andrew asked, looking at her.

"Not as much as he was last night..." MJ said, rolling her eyes.

"Okay..." Andrew replied, giving MJ a side hug so that his chin rested on her head for a second. "I'll see you in Pre Med club - you're doing great today."

"Thanks..." MJ said.

And with that, Andrew left, high-fiving another friend of his on his way to class.

Peter's blood was boiling. How come Andrew got to _touch_ her? How come he got to tell her she was doing great? He started to realize that it was probably Andrew who convinced MJ to come to school that day. He couldn't help wondering if Andrew stayed over last night...if he and MJ actually had sex this time.

"Wow..." Peter said. "You came back to school because of _him?"_

_"_ It's not just because of him, Peter, I'm doing this for myself..." MJ said, sighing, before walking past him and making her way back to class.

_Great,_ Peter thought. Now _he_ looked like the bad guy, when all he was trying to do in the first place was protect her. He was trying to get justice...for her. Every single thing he had tried to investigate with Ned...was for her.

And now she hated him.

At lunch that day, Peter assumed his usual position next to Ned.

"How was Physics?" Ned asked, eating some noodles he had bought earlier.

"MJ's back..." Peter said, ignoring Ned's question and looking down at his food. He didn't even feel like eating anything.

"MJ's back?" Ned replied, his eyes widening. "That's awesome for her..."

"Yeah...it's so...fucking awesome for her..." Peter said, cutting a bit of his burger with a knife and fork. Which he never did.

"Don't be a douche, Peter..." Ned said, turning to look at him. "She's been having problems with her anxiety and this is a big step for her."

"How is _hiding_ your problems from the whole world a big step?" Peter said, raising his voice. "How does that help in any way?"

Ned just sighed and started to go on his phone. Shortly after that, Peter saw Andrew and MJ walk into the cafeteria with their trays. Andrew was talking away to MJ and she was smiling a little but looked a little daunted at the prospect of being there.

Peter watched as Andrew picked a lone table away from the seniors and sat down with MJ on it.

"They're not sitting with the seniors..." Ned whispered to Peter.

"I'm not surprised..." Peter whispered back. "MJ can't stand them...she's not gonna change that for Andrew."

They both watched as people on the senior table started to whisper amongst themselves and look at Andrew and MJ. Flash and Tyler kept turning their heads towards them, then looking back and laughing.

"This isn't gonna end well..." Peter said, his heart skipping a beat.

"Andrew!" Flash called out, loud enough for most of the cafeteria to hear. "Why aren't you sitting here?"

"It's a free country!" Andrew called back. "And I kinda didn't wanna listen to your whiny voice anyway!"

Half of the cafeteria burst into laughter as Peter watched Flash look down in embarrassment. Peter thought that Flash had some balls to target Andrew, who was a senior.

He saw MJ laugh a little too, and engage in more conversation with Andrew. Peter could tell that she felt safe with him, because she seemed more relaxed than she had ever been before.

After the laughter had died down a little, Peter heard another voice from the senior table.

"Slut!" he heard another linebacker call out.

Andrew looked more pissed than he did the first time.

"Hey..." Andrew called back to him. "What the _fuck_ did you say?"

The whole cafeteria was silent now, and people on the senior table started to look antsy.

"Everyone just shut up!" Maya called out.

Peter noticed that she was sitting on Oscar's lap and they were sharing each other's food.

"Thanks for the comment, Maya but I'm not gonna shut up..." Andrew called back. "I wanna know which one of you motherfuckers said the word 'slut'..."

The cafeteria had never been this dead silent.

Everyone had stopped eating and was looking at either the senior table or the table that Andrew sat on. MJ looked extremely uncomfortable, biting her lip, and staring at the floor.

"Oh my God..." Ned whispered to Peter, who's eyes were fixated on MJ.

"Why do you care?" Flash called out again. "He could have been calling anyone a slut."

The linebacker who said it flushed red, and looked as if he wanted to disappear.

"Shouldn't you shut the fuck up Flash?" Andrew replied. "Aren't you like...a fucking Junior? I wanna know who he was referring to as a slut."

Peter was astounded. His heart sunk a little, because he knew he would never have had the balls to defend MJ like this in front of pretty much the whole school.

"MJ!" Flash called out, ignoring Andrew. "Tell your boyfriend how many other guys you slept with while you were away. You've probably lost track by now."

The entire cafeteria watched as Andrew stood up from where he was sitting and stormed over to Flash, grabbing the collar of his shirt.

"Say that again!" He screamed into Flash's face.

"Leave me alone dude!" Flash shouted.

" _Fucking_ say what you just said to her again!" Andrew shouted. "So I can punch your teeth out of your big mouth!"

Flash shook his head, looking terrified now.

"Huh?" Andrew screamed again, pulling his collar tighter and tighter. "I can't fucking hear you!"

Flash shook his head a second time, and Andrew basically _lifted_ him out of his seat and slammed him against the wall before raising his arm to punch him. Brian tried to pull Andrew off Flash from behind and a whole fight broke out.

Peter looked over at MJ and saw the tears in her eyes. She grabbed her backpack, stood up, and hurried out of the cafeteria.

"Holy shit..." Ned said, as he watched the fight unfold.

Peter stood up.

"Where are you going?" Ned asked.

"After MJ..." Peter said, abandoning his food and darting out through the cafeteria double doors.

His heart was beating so fast again. As he left, he saw three teachers run in to try and break the fight. He was too fixated on MJ to worry about what was going on in there anymore.

"MJ!" he shouted after her, as he saw her leave school from the front door and go down the steps.

Peter ran after her. He was surprised by how fast he could go, taking MJ's route out of school and shooting down the stairs.

"MJ...just...hold on a second!" Peter said, out of breath.

She had stopped by the bottom of the stairs, and turned round to face Peter, tears streaming down her face.

"What do you want?" She shouted, crying.

She grabbed her bike, which she had parked near the road and proceeded to get on it.

Peter couldn't just let her _leave_ again. He couldn't stand that she didn't feel safe in school anymore, and he couldn't stand that she had been lying to him this whole time.

"MJ...no..." Peter said, putting his hands over the front of her bike to stop her. "You need to tell me what the fuck is going on now."

"I don't have to tell you anything..." MJ sobbed. "Let me go..."

She was really crying now and her nose was running. She wiped her face with her sweater quickly.

"Andrew's not..." Peter began, staring into MJ's eyes. "Andrew's not a douche, and he didn't do anything to you."

"Let me go..." MJ begged again, still trying to get on her bike.

"He's a good guy..." Peter continued.

"I know!" MJ shouted. "What's your fucking point Peter?"

"Tell me what happened..." Peter said, trying to sound calm for her. "It's just you and me here, so tell me."

"Tell you _what?_..."

"What happened at Liz's party."

"I fucked _Andrew,_ Peter-"

"You're lying!"

"I'm not-"

"You're lying MJ! Do you know how I know?   
Because Andrew told me... _himself._ You didn't have sex with him. So was it someone else?"

MJ just shook her head, still sobbing.

"Leave me alone..." she just kept on saying.

"MJ, I get it...you're hurt...and you're angry but you need to _talk_ to me. What _happened_?"

"Nothing..." MJ said, quietly.

"You're lying again..." Peter said, feeling tears at the back of his eyes. "You're not a slut, MJ. You're smart...and reserved...and you don't give things away easily. Someone _hurt_ you, MJ. Someone took your virginity and you didn't want them to..."

MJ shook her head again, her breath quickening.

"Peter! _Nothing_ fucking happened! Leave me alone....just let me go....." MJ said, her voice barely a whisper over her tears. "Please, let me go..."

Peter reluctantly released his grip from the front of her bike, and let her go.

Then he put his hands in his hair as he watched her speed down the street.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Peter flung the door open to his apartment and dumped his bag on the floor. Aunt May was cooking something and it smelt quite good. But Peter couldn't concentrate on May's cooking.

He was distraught.

"May..." he said, sitting down on the kitchen table and putting his head down on it. His voice shook way more than he wanted it to.

"Peter?..." she said, switching off the stove and walking towards him. "You okay?"

_I hear they say the bitch doesn't shut up - and then she passes out._

Peter's ears were ringing again.

_And then you carry on fucking her, because that's all she's good for._

He felt May put her hands on his shoulders, and rub his back.

Peter couldn't even cry. He was filled with so much anger and confusion that it was hard to even think about crying and letting his emotions out again. His tears remained as frozen as they were earlier.

"It's okay..." May said, her voice calm and reassuring. "Just breathe..."

Peter turned to look at her, and she touched his cheek with her hands, before stroking his hair.

"Let out a deep breath, honey..." May said.

Peter did. His heart was pounding in his chest and he didn't know what to do about it.

He concluded that this was probably the worst day of his life so far. And it was more than not doing as well as he would have liked on his Physics mid-term. It was seeing MJ's face before she rode her bike away from him. It was knowing that _yet_ , she still didn't tell him what happened. It was knowing that some other _asshole_ took advantage of her.

"You're okay..." May said, as Peter relaxed again.

"Everything's...just... _so_ hard..." he whispered.

"I know..."

He liked that May didn't have to know what he was talking about to comfort him. She always knew the _right_ thing to say to make him feel better.

"I don't hate you..." Peter said quietly, his voice still shaking. "I didn't mean what I said, I didn't. I promise."

"I know, honey..." May said, stroking the back of his neck. "Listen...sometimes, people say stuff they don't mean. Even I do it. Don't I?"

Peter nodded, sniffing.

"So it's not your fault..." she said, softly. "You've just gotta accept what happens in life, and you just gotta do your best. I _know_ you're doing your best. So, it's okay...don't beat yourself up about it."

"Thanks..." Peter said.

"I love you, tough guy..." May said.

"Love you too..." he replied, embracing May in a hug.

For some reason, just for those four seconds Peter was hugging May, he felt at peace.

"Do you wanna go get some Thai food?" May asked, standing up. "From your favourite place?"

Peter thought about it for a while. To be alone with May is all he really wanted right now.

"That sounds nice..." he replied.

Peter got changed into some more comfortable clothes and May, abandoning her cooking, drove them both to their local Thai restaurant.

He felt calm there - he felt at peace knowing that May was there, and she wasn't going anywhere. She didn't have to leave to go to work - it was always an hour and a half that Peter got her full attention for.

There was a buffet on, and Peter loaded his plate with a lot of delicious food. He always kinda forgot to eat these days. This was the first proper meal he'd had all day. In fact, it was the first proper thing he'd eaten since he threw up in a garbage can outside the club...and that was nearly a day ago.

May picked a table near the corner of the restaurant and they both sat down to eat. As he took the first bite of Pad Thai noodles and crispy seaweed, he felt right at home.

"This place is amazing..." Peter said, chewing on his food.

"It really is..." May said. "I need to steal a bunch of recipes so I can start making Thai food for you at home..."

"I'd like that..." Peter said, laughing a little.

May took a sip of her green tea.

"We need to think about decorating the apartment for Christmas..." she said. "And it means bringing out your Uncle Ben's tacky tree again."

Peter smiled. He loved decorating the apartment for Christmas. It meant that him and May got to spend hours untangling lights while watching 'Elf' on the TV.

Peter and May continued to catch up on each other's lives. He left out several details, like the whole MJ situation and getting himself absolutely shit-faced last night, but they talked about Peter's mid-terms and how May's new job was going.

They were the only ones sat to eat at the restaurant, and that was Peter's favourite time to go. When there was no one there.

It all changed when two people walked in. A middle-aged woman looking casual in jeans and a blouse. She was with her son, and they both had the same hazel eyes. He was wearing a white Gucci hoodie with gold writing across the front, paired with some black trainers that Peter was sure were limited edition of some kind.

Peter would be able to recognize those eyes from a mile away.

It was Oscar, and his mom.

_Oscar?_ Peter thought.

He guessed that he was the new kid on the block but had never seen him around this area before. His mind flashed back to their encounter, and him giving Peter the master locker combination.

He seemed more relaxed and like a normal kid when he was around his mom. She made jokes to him and he laughed goofily, putting a hand in his pocket and moving his long hair out of his face. They both looked very.... _expensive,_ Peter thought.

May saw Peter watching them.

"Oh, my gosh..." May whispered, pursing her lips and squinting. "That's my boss, Sara."

"Oh..." Peter said, surprised. "I know the boy from school...he's a senior."

"Oooo..." May said, sipping her green tea again.   
"He's quite good looking, isn't he?"

"May..." Peter said, trying not to laugh.

"It's the truth..." May said, looking back at Peter. "I'm gonna go say hi to Sara..."

Before Peter could protest, May had stood up to greet Sara and Oscar. It was then that Oscar made eye contact with him. Peter felt like he had to get up now.

Reluctantly, he walked up to where they were all standing, in front of the door.

"Hi Peter!" Sara said, reaching out to shake his hand. "I'm Sara, and I work with your Aunt. It's so nice to finally meet you..."

"Hi..." Peter said, forcing a smile.

"This is my son, Oscar..." Sara began.

"Oh, no mom..." Oscar said quickly. "I know Peter from school. We met a few days ago."

"Well that's nice..." Sara said, her bright eyes turning to look at them both.

"We should all sit together..." May said. "Peter and I only started eating and the buffet's over there, so you can come and join us."

Peter looked hesitant but Oscar just smiled. He was finding this whole thing kind of funny, Peter thought.

"Great!" Sara said, beaming at them all. "We'll come join you in a minute."

Peter watched as Sara and Oscar went over to get their food and May moved a table to where she and Peter were sitting, and placed two chairs next to it.

"What a coincidence..." May said, chuckling.   
"Are you okay with this, Peter?"

Peter didn't want to disappoint May.

"Yeah...it's fine..." he said, holding back every emotion he felt at that moment. After all, Oscar hadn't really done anything to hurt him directly.

When him and his mom came over to sit down, Sara initiated a conversation about college, which May was really interested in.

"Where are you applying, Oscar?" May asked.

"Umm..." Oscar said. "I applied early to M.I.T...but I don't really know yet. Maybe Berkeley or Cornell, if I don't get in."

Peter noticed how shy he was in front of adults and how less aggressive his voice sounded when he wasn't surrounded by all his friends.

"So you're smart, huh?" May said.

Oscar laughed a little, kind of goofily, Peter thought.

"I don't know..." Oscar said. "There's a lot of competition out there."

"Yeah that's right..." Sara said, nodding. "His Dad wanted to home-school him at the beginning of this year, so he took a few weeks off. But you didn't prefer that to actually being at school, did you, honey?"

Oscar shook his head, putting some rice in his mouth.

All Peter could do was stare at him. He couldn't believe this was the same guy that called him 'Pussy Parker'.

"What about you, Peter?" Sara asked. "Have you started thinking about college?"

"Not really..." Peter said.

"Just take as many different APs as you can..." Oscar said, looking at Peter. "You're really smart anyway, so you'll be okay."

"That's good advice, thanks Oscar..." May said, touching Peter's shoulder.

Peter couldn't understand why all these popular kids where such wastes of space in school, but could actually behave _normally_ in real life.

"What about the party?" Sara asked. "Did you invite Peter?"

"Oh..." Oscar said, putting down his fork. "I'm having a party this weekend at my house...if you wanna come. And you can bring Ned, I know he's your best friend."

_What?_ , Peter thought. _Why_ was he being so nice?

Peter looked at May for her approval on this because she knew he had previously grounded him.

"I'm sure you can make it Peter..." May smiled.

So he wasn't grounded anymore, Peter thought.

They all continued to talk about college and Oscar's life at his previous school, and how he had to move because he wasn't being challenged academically, and how his Dad owns this huge car company.

At one point, Sara and May both stood up to get some more food, while Peter and Oscar were left at the table, much to Peter's annoyance.

"Wow dude..." Oscar said, nudging Peter. "Your Aunt's really nice."

"She is..." Peter said, quietly.

There was a silence, and Oscar put another spoonful of rice in his mouth.

"Kinda crazy what happened at school today..."  
Oscar said.

"Are you screwing Maya now?" Peter said randomly, his mind flashing back to her sitting on Oscar's lap at lunch.

"No..." Oscar said, smiling in that way that made Peter want to die again. "Not yet at least."

It was weird, Peter knew he was straight, but he guessed he could always be straight and slightly gay for Oscar. That worked.

He wanted to get some information out of this guy about MJ.

"Were you at Liz's party?" Peter said, not even wasting time on asking his questions.

"Yeah..." Oscar replied.

"I didn't see you."

"I was hanging around Tyler and Brian most of the time..." Oscar said, sipping his soda.

"Tyler?" Peter asked.

"Yeah don't you...how come I didn't see you, then?"

"I was probably passed out somewhere..." Peter muttered.

Oscar shrugged.

"Oh well..." Oscar said, looking at Peter and then smiling again.

He could have sworn that Oscar's eyes were gleaming. If Oscar's mom was going to go around inviting a bunch of people, Peter knew that he _had_ to go to Oscar's party, even if it was the last thing he did.

He had to get more answers.

For MJ.

 


	9. Please

It was Friday afternoon and Peter had gotten back from another semi-lonely day at school. The whole mood there had seemed somber and MJ was nowhere to be seen. Of course not, after everything that happened.

He got home from school and May was out so he warmed up some left over Thai food, and sat in front of the TV watching 'Keeping up with the Kardashians' because it was the only thing semi-interesting that was airing.

Then he went back to his room and got down to some homework. He was analyzing some AP English Lit poems and had his laptop opened up in front of him with all his notes.

He was so confused when he got an email from MJ's Dad. MJ's Dad? He had to stare at the email for about half a minute, to make sure it was real.

_'Dear Peter,_

_I have attached my phone number below. I am going out of town for the weekend, and as you would expect, because she came home home from school crying a few days ago, I am extremely worried about her and do not want her to stay alone. We discussed about her going over to stay_ _at a friend's house but she re-iterates that she is more comfortable at home. Of all of her friends, I figured you or Andrew could maybe come and stay at my home for the weekend, with MJ, to keep an eye on her. Andrew is busy with applications so I expect you would be a better choice. I would love to meet at a coffee shop to discuss this weekend further. Please send me a text if you are willing to do this._

_Kind Regards,_  
_Walter Jones_

Peter read the message about five times over, praying there was something he hadn't left out. It was already Friday night and he hoped he wasn't too late. Sat at his desk, he grabbed his phone and began sending a text to Walter:

_'Hey Mr Jones. Thanks so much for the invite. I'm happy to meet up with you this afternoon before you leave town.'_

Peter wasn't expecting a quick reply. He knew Mr. Jones was a busy man. But it seemed that when it came down to MJ, he would do everything in his power to make sure she was happy. And this was a clear example of that.

Just after he had finished his English homework, Peter's phone buzzed with a message.

_'Perfect. We'll meet at Ollie's Restaurant at 4pm.'_

Peter felt like he was going to a college interview. It was probably the most formal email that he'd read in a long time.

 _Relax,_ he thought.

It was MJ's Dad. Nothing bad was going to happen. He was more worried about what he would say when Walter would inevitably interrogate him about everything going on with MJ at school, but he was also relieved that _he_ was the one Walter was entrusting MJ with, and not Andrew. Even though, Andrew was a badass when he gave Flash a piece of his mind that day at lunch.

Peter put his earphones in his ears. It was 3pm. He had an hour to finish his homework and find something semi-decent to wear to this 'meeting.'

The hour seemed to go on forever. He was trying to read 'Pride and Prejudice' but he really couldn't concentrate. Every five minutes or so, he would check the time on his phone, feeling more nervous.

At 3:40pm, Peter slammed the book shut, he pulled on some blue jeans and the cleanest black T-shirt in his closet, then searched for that fancy vintage coat that used to be his Dad's. May had given it to him as a gift for his seventeenth birthday.

 _Apparently,_ it still smelt like his Dad.

Even though, May knew that Peter couldn't remember what his parents smelt like. Peter shrugged the coat on then looked in his mirror.

He smoothed back his curls with his hands. He had accepted the fact that there was nothing he could ever do with his hair.

Then he put on some cologne, grabbed his wallet and phone, and left. Peter knew where _Ollie's_ was even though he'd only been there once when Ned's parents took him and Ned there. He knew it was expensive. They would sell a slice of cake for 35 dollars and claim it had maybe a sprinkle of 'real gold' in it or whatever.

So Peter walked with a determined gait. It was two minutes till 4pm. As he approached the shop, he could already see MJ's Dad sitting on a table for two through the window.

He swallowed thickly.

MJ's Dad looked up then waved at him. For a moment, he felt relaxed, smiling and reaching to open the door. A nice looking waiter had already opened it from the inside.

"Welcome..." she said. "Would you like a-"

"He's with me." Walter called out, smiling at the lady from his seat.

"Oh." The woman said. "Pardon me - enjoy."

Peter walked towards MJ's Dad, his pace quickening. He took his hands out of his pockets, hoping they weren't sweaty and Walter stood up to shake his hand.

"Peter!" Walter exclaimed, his bald head gleaming under the warm, yellow lights. "Thanks for being so prompt."

This place was the definition of fancy. The art on the wall, the decorative ceiling, the vintage chairs and cushions, the silver cutlery.

"Hi, Mr Jones." Peter said timidly, before sitting down opposite Walter.

Walter took his seat. He was in a suit and he had a briefcase next to him. The waiter had come over.

Peter still couldn't really believe that he was so.... _formal._

"Peter- what would you like to drink or eat?" Walter asked, fiddling with his watch.

Peter was sure that it was worth thousands of dollars.

"Um, I'll just have a lemonade." Peter said.

"Nothing to eat?" Walter asked him. "They do really nice pastries here."

"I'm fine thank you, Mr Jones." Peter smiled.

The waiter turned to Walter.

"And for you Sir?"He asked, in a thick New Yorkan accent.

"A flat white." Walter said.

The waiter smiled then he left them alone.

Peter felt his heart begin to beat in his chest.

He just wanted Walter to start talking.

"So...Peter. You got my email. And I suppose you're happy to stay over?" Walter asked, placing his hands on the table.

Peter nodded.

"Fantastic." Walter said. "So, you'll have the guest bedroom. And it'll just be you two for most of the weekend. MJ has her therapist appointment on Sunday morning and I want you to make sure she goes."

Peter just kept nodding.

"You shouldn't have any disturbances...apart from Sophia, our cleaner. She comes in every morning to tidy up and what not. She's lovely, so that shouldn't be a problem. I left MJ one of my cards incase you need anything to cover all the costs - please do not spend your own money."

"Thank you. Sounds good." Peter said, relaxing a little.

The waiter brought over their drinks, placing a lemonade in front of Peter and a flat white in front of Walter.

"Thank you." Peter said to the waiter, not sure if he should start drinking.

He really didn't anticipate that he would be _this_ nervous but he was. MJ meant a lot to him. So her Dad's approval meant a lot to him.

"So, tell me? What exactly is going on at school?" Walter said, before taking a sip of his coffee. "I just...I feel like MJ isn't telling me the full story."

 _You and me both,_ Peter thought. He didn't want to drop too many names - this man was powerful.

"Well..." Peter said. "I'm sure Andrew convinced MJ to come into school the other day, which was fine, at first. She looked happy. But at lunch...well there's this group that seem to be bullying her-"

"What are their names, Peter?" MJ's Dad asked, clearing his throat and leaning into Peter.

"Um..." Peter stammered.

"Flash....Brian....those are the main culprits. They just acted like jerks in the cafeteria....they....called her names....Andrew defended her, of course. But she ran out of school - then I ran after her, but...it was too late."

MJ's dad nodded, rubbing his fingers together.

He looked as though he was thinking.

"Any reason _why_ they are calling her such awful things?" Walter asked.

Peter took a sip of his lemonade.

_Damn, it was good._

"They just like picking on people...probably because you know, she has _you._ And they find that....threatening..." Peter lied.

He didn't want to mention Liz's party or anything else, in fact. He owed it to MJ to keep that information private. Even though he himself didn't even know the full story.

"Okay..." MJ's Dad sighed. "You know, I just want her to be happy, you get me? I'd do anything for her."

Peter nodded.

"I got her a therapist, I put more money on her allowance so she could buy concert tickets and get new clothes...it just doesn't seem to be working, whatever I do." Walter continued.

Peter felt bad. He felt bad that Walter felt helpless and that he kind of maybe knew some of the truth and he was concealing it from him.

Walter checked his watch again.

"Well, I'll let her know you're coming tonight." He said. "My flight leaves in an hour and a half, so I better get going. Do you need me to talk to your aunt?"

"No, it's okay." Peter said, finishing the last of his lemonade. "I'll talk to her before I go."

Walter put a hand on Peter's shoulder.

"You're a good kid." He said. "Thank you so much."

"It's my pleasure." Peter said.

And it really was. Peter couldn't wait to see MJ.

His heart ached to hear her voice, and for her to be sarcastic, and for him to apologize thoroughly for pushing her to her limit when she was on her bike.

The waiter came by to clear the plates and MJ's Dad asked for the bill.

Peter began to reach in his pocket for his wallet.

"No, no, no, Peter, it's alright. It's on me." Walter said, pulling out his credit card.

The waiter came back and Walter also ordered a box of pastries to take away. As he paid, Walter asked Peter about how his midterms went, and how he was managing his AP classes which Peter appreciated.

"The box is for you and MJ." He said, standing up. "Take it home to her- I know she loves this place. I've got to catch my cab but you have my number. Call me as soon as you need anything."

"Thank you, Mr Jones." Peter said, standing up as well.

And with that, he left. Peter clutched the box in his hand. He knew he had to get home, pack and head over to MJ's house. He was extremely nervous and excited at the thought of seeing her.

He walked home. It was freezing. When he opened the door to the apartment, he was relieved to see Aunt May there. Just the person he was looking for.

"May." He started, noticing she was sitting on the couch, eating fruit. "I have to go to MJ's house...for the weekend."

Aunt May looked slightly confused. She gestured for Peter to come and sit down on the couch next to her.

"I just had a 'meeting' with MJ's Dad at Ollie's."

"Ollie's?" May gasped, her mouth full of kiwi. "That place is so expensive."

"Yeah, I know." Peter laughed. "Because MJ's really struggling at school and he wants someone to keep her company for the weekend...so....that's what I'm doing, I guess. Two nights - I'll be back on Sunday."

Aunt May, nodded, pushing up her glasses and trying to intercept all this information.

"Is MJ okay?" May sighed, looking up at Peter.

Peter sighed too.

"Not really. Some jerks at school are giving her a hard time..." he said.

He was glad May didn't ask him for more information because he wasn't really prepared to give her any.

"Well, you look really grown up." She said, pushing her hands through his curls. "I like Richard's coat on you...handsome, just like your Dad."

Peter smiled, before pulling May into a hug. He was actually going to miss her, even though it was just two days. He felt like they had become closer in the past few days - she was literally everything to him.

"You know what?" Aunt May said, setting her plate of fruit down on the couch. "I'm going to put together a little care package for MJ. I've got some cards we can sign as well."

"Yeah." Peter said, standing up. "Sounds like a really cool idea, thanks May. I'm just going to go and start packing."

May disappeared off to her room and Peter put the pastries from Ollie's on the couch. He went into his own room and pulled out a rucksack from his wardrobe.

He didn't really know what to bring - he was shoving underwear, and clothes into his bag. His phone buzzed and MJ had sent him a text:

_I guess I'll see you soon, Parker._

Thankfully, he already had a wash bag packed from the Boston trip. He packed another pair of his trainers just as May came into his room.  
She was holding a brush, a razor and some condoms.

"Here." May said, casually. "Put them in the front of your bag."

Peter blushed profusely.

"May, I don't....I don't need those." He said.

"Peter, please. I'm not saying you're gonna use them, I just want to know you have them just in case. Pack them." She sighed.

Peter took everything that was in her hands, trying not to die inside. He packed them in the front of his bag just like she told him.

 _Why did she even have condoms?_ Peter thought.

He really didn't want to know.

Soon, Peter was pretty sure that he had packed everything that he thought he needed. He changed into a more comfortable hoodie and his sweats. Then he walked out with his backpack and saw May with a basket in her hands, darting round the apartment. She got a pen and gestured for Peter to come over to the dining table.

"I've already written her a short message on the card. Just write something small and sign it." May said.

Peter glanced at what May had written:

_'Hope you feel better soon, honey. We really miss you and want you to come over and tell us more of your funny stories. Xxx May.'_

Peter didn't know what to write.

 _'What she said. X. Peter.'_ He wrote.

May just laughed before shoving the card in an envelope. She placed it in a basket she had on the table. Peter wondered what else was in there.

"I've put Christmas DVD's in here, because it's never too early for Christmas. And some cookies I made yesterday - I baked them for Thanksgiving and MJ ate about seven so I know she'll like them."

Peter walked over to the couch and picked up the pastries from Ollie's and May shoved it into the basket.

"You know how she said she really liked my glasses? I had a pair with no prescription lying around so she can wear them for fun." May said, looking in the basket.

Peter laughed at the thought of MJ in those glasses.

"Well honey, I don't want to slow you down." She said, handing Peter the basket, before giving him a kiss on the forehead. "Just be safe this weekend - and call me."

"Yeah, of course." Peter said, as he left.

As Peter walked to MJ's house, he tried not to think about what happened the last time he saw her. He really just wanted to enjoy his weekend with her and for her not to worry about anyone in school. Not Flash, not Liz...no one.

He was determined to take her mind off things and just make her feel happy.

Oscar's party was on Monday night, and his investigation would continue then. For now, he was going to do nothing but what she wanted him to do. He was going to say things that didn't make her think about school or the night of Liz's party.

As he walked into MJ's neighborhood, he started to feel slightly nervous. It took him a minute or two before he rang her doorbell.

There was a bit of a pause then he heard footsteps and the door unlocking.

MJ was already in her pyjamas, in some black shorts and a Joan of Arc T-shirt. Her hair looked pretty, cascading down her shoulders.

It was the way Peter liked.

She looked happier than yesterday, of course. Tired, but happier. She smiled a bit when she saw the basket in Peter's hand.

"Okay, little red riding hood." MJ laughed, letting Peter in.

He loved hearing her laugh. Probably because he hated it so much when she was crying yesterday and her voice was shaking.

He never ever wanted to hear her speak like that again.

"Aunt May wanted to put together a little care package for you." He said. "Don't worry, she doesn't really know much, I'm pretty such she would have put it together anyways..."

Peter took off his shoes at the door, handing MJ the basket.

She looked inside it immediately noticing the glasses, of which she took out and put on.

"Do I look like May, yet?" She laughed, putting her free hand on her hip.

Peter laughed too.

"In a _really_ creepy way, you kind of look a lot like her." He said, taking out his phone and taking a picture of MJ. "She's going to love this picture."

MJ kept on giggling. He wished she would laugh all day.

"Aw, Christmas films?" MJ said, then laughing as she opened the card. She kept on rummaging though the basket. "And those cookies! They're my favorite."

She smelt them.

"Mm, mm, mm." She said. "I'm gonna fix them up with some ice cream. You want some, Peter?"

Peter nodded, before taking a seat at the dinner table. MJ placed the basket on the table before opening up the fridge.

"I heard you got the highest score on the Physics midterm." Peter said, watching her intently. "No one got higher than a 97."

"Really?" MJ asked, grabbing a tub of vanilla ice cream from out of the freezer.

"Yeah." Peter said.

"I don't think I've ever been top of the class." She said, opening up the ice cream. "I need a big, fat, spoon."

Peter stood up, grabbing one out of the drawer next to him and handing it to MJ.

"Thanks." She said, stabbing the spoon into the ice cream.

"Shouldn't we let it defrost first?" Peter laughed.

"Nah, I like it when it's like super cold and it gives you brain freeze." She said.

She was struggling so Peter took over as MJ got bowls. The ice cream was super tough but he managed to cut out some size-able chunks.

MJ handed him a small spoon and dumped some of May's cookies into each bowl.

She sat opposite Peter on the table and took a large bite of the cookie with some ice cream.

"Oh my God..." she groaned. "I'm literally getting a food orgasm, right now."

Peter smirked, before eating some of his own ice cream.

He thought about MJ actually having an orgasm.

"I bet you have loads of homework." Peter said, trying to change the subject.

MJ shook her head.

"Not as much as I expected. I mean, I've missed so many days of school but Mr. Davies only gave me one research paper essay and then I just have some lab notes to copy up from AP Bio. That's about it."

Peter licked his spoon. He liked the way she tried to save every last bit of the cookie and how she basically licked the whole bowl clean.

"Damn, we don't even need to put that in the dishwasher." Peter said.

"Shut up, Parker." MJ said playfully, standing up and shoving the two bowls in the dishwasher anyway.

Peter washed his hands because he hated how sticky his fingers felt. And then MJ decided she wanted to wash her hands too.

They were shoulder to shoulder, and every time Peter rinsed his hands, MJ would be annoying and pour soap on them.

"Stop!" Peter laughed, flicking water in her face.

MJ laughed and threatened to put a sponge full of soap on Peter's face.

"Okay, okay, I'm done messing with you." She said, drying her hands with a towel underneath the sink.

Peter liked this MJ.

Well, he didn't _mind_ vulnerable MJ but he loved when MJ was just herself. He loved how she always had pastel pink nails and always wore the same gold necklace and the same gold anklet.

They both sat down on the couch together, MJ holding Aunt May's care package.

"So, what did my Dad say?" MJ asked Peter.

"Just logistics." Peter said. "That I should make sure you go to your therapist appointment and stuff-"

"Did he ask about school?"

Peter couldn't exactly lie.

"Not much, but I basically didn't tell him anything he didn't already know." Peter said.  
He wondered if she had forgotten what he had said to her when she was on her bike. If that would change they way she acted around him- but it didn't. And Peter was so relieved.

"Do you wanna watch Elf?" MJ asked.

"Sure." Peter said.

"Go upstairs and get into something comfy. The guest room is the second door on the right." She said, reaching out to touch Peter's arm quickly. He liked the way her fingers felt on him.

"Yeah....sure." Peter said.

He grabbed his rucksack and headed upstairs to the guest room.

Jesus, it was huge, he thought.

The floor was a soft, pastel grey carpet and there was a huge king sized bed with white and grey sheets.

Peter walked into the bathroom. There was a massive jacuzzi, a huge bathtub and an even bigger shower with glass doors. The walls were made of marble and so was the floor.

Peter always thought about how he wanted to be successful, so he could provide this kind of luxury for his own kids and be proud that he did it himself.

He realized he was getting distracted.

He stripped down to his boxers, before grabbing some shorts and a white T-shirt out of his bag and slipping them on. Then he pulled on some ankle socks before walking down the stairs to see MJ.

She had already set up the movie.

"Peter, are you hungry?" MJ asked him, seeing him come down the stairs.

"Not really. I kind of feel sick after all that ice cream." Peter replied.

"Same." MJ sighed.

Peter assumed his position on the couch. MJ had a fluffy blue blanket and spread it over both of their legs. He was thankful, because he was slightly cold.

They watched the movie, and Peter had always found 'Elf' hilarious. MJ claimed she had never watched it, and laughed at everything.

Peter looked over and watched her laughing.

He liked how her nose crinkled up when she smiled and how she was always pushing her hair out of her face, but failing to keep it in place, and how one of her front teeth stuck out ever so slightly in front of the other. He liked how her knees were curled up at the side of the couch and how he could feel her toes on his thigh as he sat upright.

He liked a lot of things about MJ, he thought.

When the movie was over, Peter was nearly asleep until she tapped him on the shoulder.

"Sleepy, Parker?" She asked him.

"Not really." Peter yawned. "I've just watched that film so many times. It's still good, though."

He couldn't tell whether MJ was tired too or if she wanted to watch more movies or if she wanted to go upstairs to her room.

Sometimes, it frustrated him that he couldn't read her mind.

He was glad though, that they had gone the whole evening without bringing up Liz's party or the incident in the cafeteria.

"I guess we should head up to bed. It's late." MJ said.

"Yeah." Peter said, standing up. He grabbed the blanket and began folding it.

"Don't worry, Sophia will do it in the morning..." MJ said.

So he left it. He was kind of used to just doing whatever she told him to. They both walked upstairs, MJ telling a funny story about how she had slipped down the stairs on her first day of Freshman year and how she had to get her butt massaged for three weeks. Peter laughed, but he gripped unto the railing tighter, just in case.

When they reached the landing, MJ gave Peter a quick hug.

"Night, Parker." She said.

"Goodnight MJ." Peter replied.

She turned right then he turned left, and he tried not to look back at her, even though he really wanted to. When he got into his massive room, he closed the door behind him before closing the curtains. Then he played some Juice Wrld on his phone as he brushed his teeth.

He checked his watch. Half past 12.

It _was_ pretty late.

He stripped to his boxers then turned out the lights and pulled the cold duvet over him - and then he wasn't so tired after all.

He got out his phone and began texting Ned.

_'I'm staying at MJ's house tonight. Long story.'_

Peter waited for Ned to reply:  
_'Really? Have fun, I guess.'_

He didn't expect to get too much conversation out of Ned.

Then he texted May:  
_'I'm okay. MJ's Okay. Love you. Goodnight.'_

And Aunt May replied almost instantly with four kiss face emojis.

Peter was about to put his phone down when he got another text.

MJ.

_'U up?'_

Peter didn't realize how happy he was that she sent him that text. Even though she was only a few doors away.

_'Yeah. Are u okay?'_

MJ didn't reply. Ten minutes later, and there was still nothing. Peter began to think she had fallen asleep. He turned over, getting ready to put his phone down by the bedside table when he heard the door open.

"MJ?" Peter said, reaching over to open the curtain a little bit.

"Who else would it be?" MJ replied.

He could hardly see her, but she became clearer once the light from outside shone on her. She looked the same as she did nearly an hour ago when Peter said goodnight to her.

"Is everything alright?" Peter asked, sitting up now and combing his hair with his hands.

MJ nodded.

Peter remembered how MJ had let him climb into bed with her that night that they watched the movie. He looked over at her, again, trying to figure out what she wanted.

She sighed and sat at the edge of the bed.

"Do you want me to get you a glass of water?" Peter asked.

MJ shook her head. There was a small silence and then MJ stood up, turned over the covers, then climbed in with Peter.

Peter was sort of expecting it but having her that close to him again was a euphoric feeling.  
She propped a pillow up behind her before laying her head down on it. Peter didn't know what to do.

"Just lie down, Parker." MJ said, smiling a bit.

So he did. He lay down next to her and for a good five minutes, they didn't say anything to each other. He just closed his eyes and listened to the sound of her breathing as thoughts spiraled through his mind.

"My Dad just doesn't get it." MJ said, out of the blue.

He was glad that she had given him an excuse to open his eyes and look at her.

"He's just...." MJ began. "He _wants_ to help me. But sometimes, I don't need a great college essay, or a good grade, or a birthday party, or concert tickets...I just want my dad."

Peter was still looking at her and she was looking up at the ceiling, her eyes tired.

"I know." Peter said. "I get it."

MJ looked over at him. Their faces were so close now. He could see every feature of her face clearly, and he liked it.

"Uncle Ben was kind of like that too..." Peter said. "He was always so busy all the time...going from one place to next...he always worked hard so he could get me the best of everything, the best running shoes, the best education, the best tech equipment, and that stuff _did_ matter to me, I guess."

He liked how MJ was looking at him, listening intensely, her eyes wide.

"And then one day, he.....he got shot." Peter gulped. "And.....I realized, I didn't even really know who he was. I never really sat down with him to have a heart-to-heart. I felt like I was mourning a man I didn't even fucking know. When he died, I felt guilty and responsible for making him work all his life...for me. And he left us and all that stability was gone. We just had to pull ourselves together. I guess that's why May and I are so close....but I don't wish what I felt upon anyone."

MJ was still looking at Peter.

"Your dad loves you, MJ." Peter said. "You just gotta let him know exactly how you feel. You'll get there."

MJ didn't say anything else. She was still looking up at Peter, her head pressed on the pillow.

Her hair was brushing against his cheek and he didn't want her to move, so he could just lie that close to her, forever.

But MJ sat up a little, her weight leaning on her elbow. Her eyes locked with Peter's and then at that moment, there was nothing he wanted more in the world than her.

 _All_ of her.

She looked at him, her eyes desperate, then leaned in to kiss Peter, slowly, her hair caressing the sides of face. Every inch of Peter's body was aching. He kissed her back, as his heart started to race. Then she broke away.

"Peter?" She said, her voice slightly shaky.

Peter swallowed.

"Can you _touch_ me?" She asked, pleadingly.

Peter looked away, then back at her, his lips parting.

"MJ, I-"

"I _want_ you to." She said, putting a hand on his arm. "Please."

Peter was conflicted. He _wanted_ to touch her.

God, he wanted to make love to her but he was scared. He was scared of how it would make her feel and he was scared that even MJ herself  
didn't really know what she wanted.

"Are you sure?" Peter asked.

MJ nodded, before laying back down. Peter turned so he was facing her, his weight on his elbow, his heart beating out his chest.

He took a deep breath then started by moving her hair out of her face, his fingers slightly shaking. MJ looked more relaxed than he had ever seen her before, her big brown eyes looking up at him.

Then he kissed her softly, moving his fingers down her face and down her neck.

Her eyes were closed and Peter thought about how beautiful she looked. Then he slid his hand slowly, under her top, behind her back as he kissed her mouth and her neck.

MJ began to moan against his lips and he thought about how he'd always wanted to hear her moan at his touch. He combed his fingers down her chest, exploring it with his fingers.

She gasped a little as he kissed her neck. He stopped kissing her to look up at her. He watched the rise and fall of her chest quicken and her lips part, her eyes still closed, and he could feel his body tensing up.

Then he ran his fingers slowly, over MJ's stomach, down to her hips and down beneath her shorts.

Peter had never fingered a girl before - but MJ _wanted_ him to touch her - so that's what he did.

He touched her, sliding down the bed so he could kiss her stomach and hips, and as he looked up to watch her gasp and moan - MJ's own moan - he felt _so_ good. And not just turned on, but happy.

He felt more pleasure than he'd ever felt in a long time. When he stopped, MJ was out of breath. And so was he.

Peter lay on his back, next to her. He felt her sit up and pull her top over her head, slowly, so he could finally see all that he had been touching.

He'd never seen her bare chested till now. She slid off her shorts and her underwear from underneath her and tossed them to the floor.

Then she lay back down next to him, fully naked. Peter kept thinking that he was dreaming. She sat up, leaned over and kissed him, more passionately this time. He had to sit up slightly and put a hand behind her neck.

He felt her tongue swirl around his mouth and kissed her back even more passionately.

They broke apart for a few seconds, both catching their breath, MJ still leaning over him.

Peter was still scared. He was so scared he would start having sex with her and then she would hate him for it and there would be nothing he could do to fix it.

"MJ." Peter sighed. "Do you.....actually _want_ this?"

"Yes." MJ said, placing her hand on his cheek. He'd never seen her look that helpless before. "Can you, Peter?"

His head was spinning. He swung his legs round to the edge of the bed and sat up, away from MJ. He wasn't sure he wanted to do this to her. Not after what he _thought_ had happened to her.

"Peter..." He heard her say. "It's okay."

He felt her arms spread down his chest and wrap around his neck.

_No it's not, MJ._

_Who hurt you? Why did they hurt you?_

He wanted to know the truth but he knew there was no way he was going to get it out of her.

 _Just forget about it, Peter._ He thought. _Forget about everything except right now._

Peter stood up now, forcing MJ to let go of him. He turned round to her, placing a hand on his boxers, getting ready to take them off.

"You _want_ me to?" He asked her again, looking into her eyes.

"I want you to." She said firmly, getting up to sit on the edge of the bed.

So Peter took off his boxers and then he realized they were both naked in front of each other and that he'd always wanted to feel this close to her. He reached in the front of his bag for a condom, and sat back down on the bed.

MJ took it from him, opening it with ease, before handing it back to him. Then she turned to him. Peter still had that anxious look on his face.

"I'm okay, Peter." She reassured him, as Peter sat down next to her.

She rested her head on his shoulder and with the warmth of her skin on his, Peter put on the condom.

 _No more questions, Peter_ he thought. _Just do this for her._

Then MJ lay back down on the bed. He could tell she was nervous too.

"I'm okay." MJ said again, before swallowing.

He took a deep breath then cautiously climbed on top of her, placing his knees either side of her hips and then looked up at her, before entering her slowly.

MJ grabbed unto the sheets with her fingers, looking up at Peter, her breath quickening now, and Peter looked down at her, his heart feeling like it was going to burst. He felt as though he had lost all the breath in his lungs, looking at her.

She held unto the back of his hair and he kissed her mouth as he moved gently and steadily. He could feel her grip tighten as he watched her hips move against him.

He kept on looking at her face, wondering if she was real and if he was really doing this to her. He watched her take deep breaths and felt her run her delicate fingers down his neck.

He kissed all down her again, as he began to move faster, and MJ was softly telling him to keep going. That she was _okay._ He could barely hear her voice over his own thoughts.

_Who hurt you?_

He put pressure on her stomach, touching her skin. Now that he was inside her, it was the best feeling in the world. He couldn't think about anything else but how much pleasure he was feeling and how _hot_ MJ looked laying down beneath him.

_Why did they hurt you?_

Peter began moaning now too, his curls brushing against her cheek. He went faster now, till he felt a release, and she gasped loudly, sliding her hand down behind Peter's neck and down to his shoulder, and then he slowly moved out of her and laid down on the bed next to her, his back colliding with the sheets.

He was _exhausted._

He looked up at the ceiling, his lips parting. Then he felt her warm head on his chest, and her tears on his cheeks as she kissed him.

"Thank you." She sighed.

He didn't know why she was crying.

She lay her head on his shoulder and he put his arm on her back, pulling her tighter into him, feeling her bare chest on his. He kissed her forehead, softly.

"You're welcome." He said, as his eyes closed shut.

 


	10. Fancy Dress

Peter kept half opening his eyes and then shutting them again. He could hear the constant droning sound of somebody vacuuming downstairs.

His brain tried to process everything that had happened last night. He couldn't _believe_ that he was that close to MJ...that he got to touch her in the way he did. That he got to see her when she _wanted_ him.

He squinted as the daylight crept through the small gap in the curtains and onto his face. It must have been pretty late in the morning.

Peter finally opened his eyes and stared at the ceiling in front of him. He turned his head around to see MJ sleeping peacefully on the other side of the bed. She lay on her stomach and rested her head on her arms. Her hair covered the side of her face and she was breathing steadily.

 _She's so beautiful,_ Peter thought, wanting to relive the events of last night all over again. He couldn't believe that he was so scared, because it was probably the best night he'd ever had and now he was so _happy._

The sound of the vacuuming downstairs increased, and Peter remembered that it was probably Sophia, MJ's cleaner.

He decided his next move was to probably wake MJ up and get themselves both dressed before she walked in on them. After all, Peter's job was to take care of MJ and not spend the entire weekend trying to get in her pants.

Peter leaned over and ran his fingers up and down MJ's back for a bit, moving her mass of curly hair away from her face in the hope that she would wake up.

MJ groaned, opening her eyes slowly.

She made eye contact with Peter and then chuckled to herself quietly, before pulling the covers over herself a bit more and putting her head back on the pillow.

"MJ..." Peter said, touching her arm. "We gotta get up..."

Peter thought about how absurd this scenario would have seemed about a month ago, and how MJ had commented that she would _never_ have sex with him.

"Huh?" MJ said, her voice soft and tired.

"I think Sophia's downstairs..." Peter replied.

"Oh God..." MJ said, turning so that she was lying to face the ceiling now.

She turned her head back to look at Peter and he smiled, which for some reason made her laugh a little, and then he started to laugh too.

"I would.....never have seen this coming..." MJ said, reaching over to grab her oversized T-shirt off the floor and pulling it on.

"Sure..." Peter said sarcastically, but he couldn't stop smiling.

He watched as MJ put the rest of her clothes on, and practically rolled out of bed.

"You need to get up too, Parker..." MJ said, standing up and yawning. "I don't want Sophia to walk in on us. She'll tell my Dad that she saw me here with you and then he'll start lecturing me on how I should probably keep my legs closed..."

Peter put on his own clothes as he listened to MJ tell him a funny story about her Dad intruding on a date she'd had in Freshman year.

"He's always so protective like that..." MJ continued, tying her hair up. "Anyway, breakfast's gonna be downstairs...see you in a few."

MJ walked slowly up to the door and quickly smiled at him again before letting herself out.

Peter couldn't believe that this was the same MJ that was dissolving in tears on her bike, riding away from school. She almost seemed completely back to her normal self. He had seen so far that weekend how vulnerable she could be, but had also seen that she had an amazing sense of humour.

He went into his abnormally sized bathroom and brushed his teeth, before taking a quick shower and washing his hair in the process.

He put on a clean T-shirt and some jeans, then decided to let his hair air dry.

He collapsed on the bed and rolled over to grab his phone, before texting Ned.

 _'Best. Night. Ever.'_ \- he texted, waiting to let Ned figure out what he meant.

Then he quickly FaceTimed May, assuring her that everything was fine, and MJ was happy, and he had been eating okay, and he'd also given her some space. He left out the sex part, because he didn't want her to harass him about it and make him feel uncomfortable.

He went out the door and walked down the corridor, wanting to see if MJ had finished getting dressed.

He knocked on the door and she told him to come in. She had wet hair as well, and was in a grey T-shirt and blue jeans, the same colour as Peter's. She sat on her bed scrolling through her phone.

"You're done already?" MJ said, kicking her wardrobe shut with her foot. "I haven't even finished my hair yet."

Peter sat down on the bed next to her.

 _She's so beautiful,_ he thought again.

"Can you help me with Calculus later?..." MJ said, gesturing to the textbook that was on her beside table. "I got more homework by email."

"Yeah, of course...I'll help you..." Peter replied, picking it up and looking at the page that MJ had put a bookmark in.

"You know..." MJ said. "I wish I could go to school, but it just be me and you..."

Peter looked up at her.

"What do you mean?" He asked.

"The only good part about that place was sitting in front of you in Physics and passing you notes."

"I guess..." Peter said. "And sometimes, you'd write some pretty inappropriate stuff."

There was a silence as MJ nudged Peter and he thought about all the crazy and erotic things MJ would say about Mr Davies.

"I think it's cool that you're smart..." MJ said, sounding like she genuinely meant it.

"You do?" Peter asked.

MJ nodded.

"Most people don't think it's cool, but _I_ do..." she said.

"Thanks..." Peter said, blushing.

MJ put her arms around his neck and he reached over to pull her onto his lap. She smelt of lavender and he thought about how they _both_ had wet hair again.

"Should we do something fun today?" MJ asked, looking into Peter's eyes.

"Apart from me helping you with Calculus?" Peter said.

"We can go down to that bowling and crazy golf place and get some alcohol..." MJ said. "I've got my fake ID..."

Peter's mind flashed back to that night at the club when he could barely _think._

"Let's do that...but not the booze part..." Peter replied. "I'm kinda done with being wasted."

"Fair point..." MJ said shrugging.

He kissed her, because he had been longing to kiss her all morning. MJ broke away, then looked at Peter, her lips slightly parted like she couldn't believe he was real, then she snapped out of her reverie.

"Let's go eat..." MJ said, swinging herself off his lap and pulling him to stand up.

She took his hand and they went downstairs. He thought about how that was the first time she'd grabbed his hand like that.

The dining table already had food on it and it all smelt amazing, Peter thought. There were pancakes with syrup, bacon, eggs, and loads of fruit all perfectly cut up.

"Woah..." Peter said quietly. He'd never seen such an elaborate breakfast in his life.

Through the kitchen, he saw the woman who looked like Sophia wiping down the stove. She had blonde hair that was tied into a plait and a very warming smile.

"Morning MJ..." she said.

"Hey Sophia..." MJ replied, already heading over to the table to pour herself some juice. "Sorry, we both kinda woke up late today."

"You must be Peter..." Sophia said, going to straighten the cushions on the couch. "How are you dear?"

"I'm good..." Peter said, sitting down in the seat opposite MJ. "Did you make all this? It's amazing."

"Yeah, it's no big deal..." Sophia said. "Eat up."

"Thanks..." Peter and MJ both said at the same time, before both laughing.

Peter helped MJ put some pancakes and bacon on her plate before getting some too. He started to realize that he was always thinking of her before himself.

"You guys are cute..." Sophia said, looking at them.

Peter wondered if this meant that him and MJ were a couple. Did they _look_ like a couple? And did MJ want them to be?

MJ just smiled quickly and took a bite out of her pancake. His mind flashed back to the night when they were trying to write their debate speech. How she ate so messily in front of him and how he didn't care.

In true MJ-style, she dumped an insane amount of syrup on her pancake.

MJ looked up at Peter as if to see if he was watching her do that. He was.

"I know you hate it when I do that..." MJ said, putting down the syrup bottle.

"Not really..." Peter shrugged, before putting a slice of strawberry in his mouth.

"Alright then, Parker." She laughed, threatening to pick up the syrup bottle again.

And Peter was telling the truth.

Now, he didn't _hate_ much about her at all. He loved her wet hair, and her smile, and the way she laughed at everything. He even loved how fragile she was. He loved how she dressed and how she ate what she wanted. He loved how witty she could be and how she could turn almost every conversation into a joke.

"How was your night last night?..." Sophia said, walking up to the table and looking at them both. "Sleep well?"

 _Sleep well?_ Peter thought. That was the best night of sleep he thought he'd ever had.

"Yeah." MJ and Peter both said at the same time.

He was certain that he was blushing now and MJ looked like she wanted to burst out laughing.

"That's good..." Sophia said, before humming to herself and proceeding to take a pile of folded laundry up the stairs.

MJ started laughing again.

"She's onto us..." she whispered. "She's gonna get her sex detector out..."

MJ mimicked holding a machine in her hand, making a beeping sound that got more intense as she got up and walked closer to Peter.

"You're ridiculous..." Peter smiled, taking a sip of his orange juice.

Peter realized then that this was the happiest he'd ever seen her. There, right in that moment.

 _What happened to you MJ?_ he thought.

He thought about what he wanted to say. He thought about all the things he wanted to confess to her in that moment.

_Just talk to me. Just say whatever it is that's on your mind. I'm here. I'll stay, and I'll listen. I won't go anywhere. I won't judge you. I won't say you're stupid, and I won't say you're lying._

Peter looked at her. He watched her throw her head back and clutch her stomach because she was now completely beside herself with laughter. Soon, he was laughing too, still sat down trying to eat his food, and MJ was leaning against the fridge, in tears now.

 _I think I love you, MJ_. _A couple of weeks ago, I thought I hated you...but now I think I know what love actually feels like._

_It's fighting for someone even when you feel like you've been fighting for ever. It's seeing them laugh and it's seeing them cry. It's them making you laugh and making you cry. It's learning to speak up and learning to be quiet. It's being vulnerable and knowing how to be made fun of._

_It's the little things._

_It's the way you put too much syrup on your pancakes and the way you sleep with your face covered in your hair. It's the way you doodle on random pieces of paper in class and the way you always stand impatiently with one foot in front of the other._

_I think...I think I understand what love is now._

_It's running after someone even when you feel like you've been running forever. It's never wanting to leave them alone. It's learning when to scream at them and when to wrap your arms around them._

_It's trying your best._

_It's learning that life has its ups and downs and not everyday's perfect.  It's telling each other anything and everything even when you think it's hard. Even when you're scared or you think they won't understand._

_I don't think you love me yet, MJ._

That's what Peter wanted to say in that moment.

But he didn't.  
  
  
  
  
  
  


It's was the day of Oscar's party, and Peter and Ned were at Target, searching for costumes to wear. Oscar had sent round an official invitation on Snapchat and it had said 'Christmas fancy dress' on it.

Peter had asked Ned if people actually dressed up and Ned had insisted that it would be kinda lame if they didn't, so Peter agreed.

The truth was that he didn't really wanna go to this party. He didn't want to see all those seniors again, drunk and making out. He just wanted to stay at home with May and decorate the apartment.

The night before, when Peter left MJ's house, he told her that he couldn't come back the next day because he felt like he should hang out with May. That was partly true, but Peter didn't tell her that he was going to Oscar's party. He didn't want to upset her by talking about people at school.

Ned picked up an elf hat from one of the aisles and placed it next to his face.

"Do I look good in this?" Ned asked, looking for Peter for approval.

"It looks okay..." he said, shrugging.

Peter was not in the best of moods today, even though he'd had an amazing weekend. MJ's Dad had thanked Peter on the phone earlier for spending time with her. He'd said that she seemed happier and was talking to him a lot more, which made Peter happy too.

They'd gone to crazy mini-golf, and eaten chipotle. They watched another Christmas film, baked cookies and Peter had helped MJ with her homework. She spent last night in Peter's bed again, and he had just held her while she slept, before drifting off too.

School that day had been good, Peter thought.

The senior table had been divided because a few people had taken Andrew's side, and others had taken Flash's. They weren't as loud and obnoxious as they usually were.

He'd gotten on well that day without MJ and was sort of happy to know that she was happier at home.

"Are you okay dude?" Ned asked, putting the elf hat in his shopping cart. "You seem a bit off today."

"I'm fine..." Peter said, shaking his head. "I just kinda miss MJ...I guess..."

Ned looked at Peter.

"I can't believe you guys had sex..." Ned said, lowering his voice.

"I can't believe literally _anything_ that happens to me these days..." Peter replied.

He picked up a reindeer costume off the shelf and showed it to Ned.

"Go as this..." Peter said, handing it to him.

"I'm gonna look like an idiot..." Ned said, laughing.

"That's the whole point..." Peter replied. "The more idiotic it is...the better."

Peter spotted a beard and an elf costume that matched Ned's hat.

"I'll go as the elf..." Peter said, picking up the costumes. "It's way worse than yours, you have to admit."

"Yeah, you're probably right..." Ned said, sighing. "What do you expect to find out from these guys, anyway?"

"Liz told me that she knows something that I don't..." Peter said. "I'm not sure what she was talking about, but I think it obviously has something to do with her party. Maybe I can get her to tell me tonight...they're all probably gonna be wasted anyway..."

"Oh, good idea..." Ned said, chuckling. "When did Liz tell you that? You never talk to Liz."

"Oh...I...after MJ's game night, I kinda snuck out to this club and she was there. She gave me a hand job - it was really weird."

Ned's mouth gaped open.

 _"What?"_ Ned said. "You...Liz...wow, Peter wow. You are _incredibly_ sexually active..."

Peter just shrugged. He didn't really care about that kind of stuff anymore. The only person he really wanted to see half naked was MJ. She was the only girl that mattered to him.

He and Ned bought their costumes before heading back to Peter's apartment to change. May had said that Peter could take her car to the party.

"This is gonna be so awesome..." Ned said, glancing at himself in the mirror in Peter's bedroom. "I've never been to an _actual_ senior party before."

"They're pretty rough..." Peter said, looking at his hair in the mirror too.

He glanced down at the costume he was wearing and sighed. He thought he looked stupid, but no part of him cared.

How he looked to go to a party like this would have really mattered to him a few weeks ago.

"Let's go..." Peter said, grabbing May's car keys and heading out.

Peter got into the driving seat and put his hands on the wheel. It reminded him of when MJ drove him home from Liz's party, and he was lying in the back seat on the verge of unconsciousness.

He was always trying to remember how she was acting that day and if that could help him figure out what had happened to her.

Peter started to drive, focusing on the road and not looking at Ned.

"I wouldn't drink tonight, Peter..." Ned said, as if he could read his mind.

"I'm not gonna do that..." Peter replied, shaking his head.

"Good..." Ned said. "Apparently the seniors spike people's drinks all the time."

"What?"

Peter was still focusing on the road but turned round to look at Ned quickly in disbelief.

"They put all kinds of stuff in there..." Ned said. "Makes people do stuff that they don't even remember doing."

"I didn't know that..." Peter said.

"Well...now you do..." Ned replied.

Peter thought about what Ned had said. He knew the seniors were a bunch of idiots, but didn't know they could go as far as doing that.

After a few minutes, Peter pulled up at Oscar's house. He paused for a little while to make sure it was the right address, and then beckoned for Ned to follow him out of the car.

They had arrived at quite a big house, with a huge garden in front of it. Peter wasn't surprised. When he and May had sat with Oscar and his mom at the Thai restaurant, they had made it pretty obvious that they were quite wealthy.

As they walked towards the front door, Peter heard the sound of music growing louder and louder.

There wasn't any security like there was at Liz's party, so Peter just rang the doorbell and waited.

The door opened and Oscar was standing there. He was wearing a Father Christmas costume that looked a bit big on him and a beard, but Peter still recognized his hazel eyes.

"Hey guys!" Oscar said, practically shouting over the music. "Come on in.."

Peter entered the house with Ned and looked all around him. There were a lot more people there than just seniors, and Peter figured that Oscar wasn't picky about his guest list and just invited as many people as he could. There were bright lights flashing everywhere - Peter's eyes began to hurt.

People were dressed in all sorts of ridiculous costumes, which assured Peter. He saw that Andrew was DJ-ing in the corner of the room.

 _Oscar must be on Andrew's side,_ Peter thought.

Almost everyone at the party was either already drunk or consuming some form of alcohol. He could tell by the way some were dancing carelessly and laughing uncontrollably.

Oscar put a hand on Peter's shoulder and pointed towards another corner of the room.

"There's drinks and food over there for you guys...and if you have a song request, just tell Andrew and he'll hook you up."

"Thanks..." Ned nodded, smiling.

All of a sudden, Maya had walked over to where they were all standing. She was dressed in a Mrs Claus costume and her dress showed off her cleavage, as per usual. She held a drink in her hand.

Oscar put his arm around her waist.

"Hi Ned..." Maya said, her bright eyes gleaming at Ned, who just smiled back. "Oh...Peter, you're here. Is Pussy Parker coming out tonight or are you gonna get laid?"

Peter just sighed and looked at Ned, who was clearly mesmerized by Maya and how hot she looked. Peter knew that Maya was still mad at him for standing her up.

"I'm _not_ getting laid tonight..." Peter said, annoyed.

All he wanted from these people was to find out what they all knew about the night of Liz's party.

"Are you gonna come upstairs?..." Maya said to Oscar, biting her lip.

"Not now baby, I'm kinda tied up..." Oscar replied.

"Okay then..." Maya said, releasing herself from his hold. "I guess I'll see you later."

Oscar winked at her as she walked away and Peter wanted to die again.

"So you _are_ screwing Maya..." Peter said, laughing a little.

"We've done it a few times..." Oscar said, grabbing someone else's drink and consuming a large amount of it.

He offered the drink to Peter and Ned. "Do you want some?"

"No thanks..." Peter said, looking at Ned, whose face told him to not dare to touch it.

The music changed again and 'Fine China' by 'Future' started blasting through the speakers.

"This is my song!" Oscar shouted over the music again, starting to dance, kind of goofily, Peter thought again.

"Come on guys, dance..." Oscar said, urging Peter and Ned to join him.

Peter liked the song but didn't feel like dancing. He wanted to pull Ned aside and remind him to focus on the real task.

But before Peter could say anything, Ned was already dancing next to Oscar and shouting the lyrics of the music along with him.

Peter just shook his head to himself, and walked to the other corner of the room, where the drinks and food where.

There were other people standing around the table talking, but Peter was more interested to see Liz leaning against the wall on her phone.

She had an Angel costume on and was taking Snapchat stories of herself and the people around her.

Peter didn't even hesitate - he just walked up to her.

"Hey Liz..." He said, getting her attention.

Liz grabbed a drink from the side of the table and took a sip from it, eyeing him.

"Peter..." she giggled, her voice sounding light and amused.

 _She's drunk...perfect._ Peter thought.

"You look a little...tense..." Liz smiled. "I could jerk you off again if you want..."

Peter sighed again.

"Liz..." he began, ignoring her comment. "That night at the club...you said there was something that you know that I don't know...what is it?"

"Huh?" Liz said, leaning forward to hear Peter better.

"What do _you_ know, that _I_ don't know?..." Peter asked slowly.

Liz frowned and then stumbled backwards, nearly falling over, but Peter steadied her.

His mind flashed back to her party when they where on that bed together and Liz couldn't keep still. He thought about her body and how out of his depth he felt that night.

"I don't...know what you mean, Peter..." Liz replied, slurring her words.

"Something...happened...to MJ..." Peter said, speaking slow and clearly so that she could understand what he was saying.

Liz shook her head.

"I...I told Andrew to take her upstairs..." Liz began. "Because I...didn't want them fucking in front of me...

"And then?" Peter said, impatiently.

"Someone..." Liz said, really having to force her words out now. "Andrew passed out and they went in...Tyler put something in Andrew's drink and he passed out..."

Peter's head started to spin again. Was this what Liz knew all along and wouldn't tell him?

If what Ned was saying was true, then Tyler was handing people drinks that night at Liz's party, and putting all kinds of shit in them.

But _why_ would Tyler want Andrew to pass out?  
And who's-

"Who's _they_?" Peter said to Liz, nearly shouting now.

Liz frowned and looked confused again.

"I don't know what you're-"

"Who went in after Andrew went _out?"_ Peter asked, desperate for an answer.

"I don't know..." Liz said, slurring her words again. "I don't...know who they were..."

Peter could feel his heart start to race again.

 _What. The. Fuck._ He thought.

Before he could process his thoughts, the music died down for a little bit and he could see Oscar standing on a table as if he was about to make some sort of announcement.

"We're gonna play a round of Truth or Dare guys...." he said. "If you wanna play...we'll be in the living room."

Oscar looked drunk out of his mind, Peter thought.

All he wanted to do was get Ned and leave, but part of him wanted to find more answers. Part of him wanted to figure out who the _hell_ hurt MJ. It almost seemed kind of wrong to go behind her back and investigate, but Peter didn't care.

Liz was still stood in front of him, taking sips of her drink.

"Liz..." Peter said. "I think you should go lie down..."

"Maybe...I should..." Liz replied, before making her way to the nearest couch.

As people made their way towards the living room, Peter tried to spot Ned amongst the crowd.

He saw him. With his arm around Emily.

Peter grabbed Ned's shoulder and pulled him aside while Emily gave them both a look that was less than welcoming.

"Dude..." Peter hissed, looking at Ned. "We need to focus. I just got some information off of Liz..."

"You got some info!" Ned exclaimed, overjoyed.

"Shh!" Peter hissed again. "Someone spiked Andrew's drink when they knew he was with MJ. We need to find out who went into the room with her after Andrew left."

"Holy shit..." Ned said, covering his hand with his mouth. "I just don't understand...why hasn't MJ said anything until now?"

Peter didn't have the answer to that question. He didn't understand why MJ couldn't tell him what happened - _if_ anything happened to her at all - and why she _lied_ to everyone about sleeping with Andrew.

"She doesn't want to talk about it..." Peter sighed, shaking his head.

They walked into just about the biggest living room Peter had ever seen in his life. There were several elaborate couches surrounding each other, a massive chandelier at the centre of the ceiling, and a fire that kept the whole place warm.

Everyone began to sit around the floor, and there was enough space to fit about fifty of them in there.

Peter's heart rate started to increase. He glanced all around him and saw all the seniors that he hated, along with a group of other Juniors that he knew from class.

Oscar held up an empty Vodka bottle and drunkenly walked into the middle of the circle that everyone had created.

"If this lands on you..." Oscar began. "Then it's Truth or Dare. Pro-ceed..."

Oscar spun the bottle and Peter's anxiety levels were through the roof, as he prayed that it wouldn't land on him.

At one point, it landed on Flash, and he was dared to run down the block and back half naked, which he did and got praised for.

At another point, it landed on Maya, and she had to French kiss Oscar for five minutes straight, and it was probably the worst five minutes of the whole game for Peter, partly because he knew that Maya was trying to make him jealous, and partly because he just didn't want to _see_ that.

Then it landed on Brian.

"Truth or Dare?" Tyler called out, rolling over to lie on his back.

Everyone was extremely drunk now, Peter thought. He wondered where Oscar's parents were and how they let him throw parties like this.

Suddenly, Andrew walked into the room and shut the door behind him. Peter could still hear music thumping in the background.

Andrew looked pissed to see the people he didn't like sitting there.

"I've got a Truth for you, Brian..." Andrew said, folding his arms.

" _What?"_ Brian retorted, sitting up now. He looked slightly drunk but definitely not as drunk as everyone else.

The room was dead silent now, just as it had been in the cafeteria a few days ago. Andrew seemed to have that type of presence about him, that made everyone stop and look at what he was doing.

"What happened after I passed out?..." Andrew asked, looking menacingly at Brian.

"What the _fuck_ are you talking about?" Brian replied.

 _Holy shit,_ Peter thought. Could Brian have gone into MJ's room after Andrew left? Could he be the guy Peter was looking for this entire time?

"You..." Andrew said, pointing at Tyler. "You put something in my drink at Liz's party. I heard Liz tell Peter..."

_Andrew was listening?_

Tyler just shrugged.

"No I didn't..." he said, shaking his head.

"You're not a great liar, are you?" Andrew replied.

He turned round again to Brian.

"You still haven't answered my question..." Andrew said. "What happened after that?"

Everyone in the room looked slightly confused and were muttering amongst themselves, but Peter knew _exactly_ what Andrew was talking about.

"My answer is..." Brian continued. "I don't fucking know..."

"That's real funny..." Andrew laughed, sarcastically, before giving Brian another death stare and walking out.

Practically everyone looked at Brian, who was blushing immensely.

"I thought MJ had sex with Andrew..." a girl said, randomly.

"She did, didn't she?" Maya replied.

"No she didn't..." Peter said, and as soon as he said it, he wished that he never said anything at all.

Everyone turned to look at Peter this time.

"MJ didn't have sex with Andrew..." Peter said. "And someone here knows the full story."

"I think this game is over..." Tyler said, standing up and walking out.

"Everyone...just relax..." Oscar said. "Let's not fight for once...let's just enjoy the party..."

Everyone started to get up and leave the room, whispering among each other. Peter could hear the sounds of their conversations clearly, and it sounded like they were all extremely confused.

Peter was just relieved that this stupid game was over.

"Oh my God..." Ned said, looking at Peter. "Wow Peter, that was insane."

"Let's go Ned..." Peter said, steering him out of the living room and into the scene of the main party again.

They just kept walking until they found the main door, but before Peter was about to open it and get the fuck out of there, he saw Brian talking on the phone to someone.

"They're completely on to us..." Brian said, his voice shaking slightly.

Peter's heart skipped a beat.

"Are you coming?" Ned called out to Peter, already out of the door and trying to find May's car.

He couldn't believe what he had just heard. _Us, who's us?_ He thought.

_It's fighting for someone even when you feel like you've been fighting forever._

"Yeah, I'm coming Ned." Peter replied, before slipping out of the door.

 


	11. Demons

"You're not going into school today, Peter." Aunt May said, as she looked at the thermometer.

"Can I at least go in to get my books?" Peter asked, before coughing.

Peter had come down with something small, and of course, May was overreacting. She always did.

He was lying down in his bed, the covers pulled up to his waist. Peter was definitely one of those people that kind of just ignored being sick.

"Fine..." May, sighed. "But you nearly have a fever, Peter. Put on a warm jacket then go get your stuff and come straight back. I've got a shift at work today, so I wanna make sure you're at home and you have all you need."

Peter sat up, and all the blood rushed to his head. When he finished showering, he felt slightly better but still awful.

"Do you want breakfast?" May asked Peter, as he coughed again.

She was still in her pajamas, leaning on the kitchen table, that stressed look on her face.

"I'm good, May." Peter said, walking up to the door.

"Half an hour, Peter." May said. "There and back."

"I've got it, May." Peter sighed, before leaving.

His throat was hurting like hell, and the prospect of missing school sort of made him feel uneasy. The football team had left for a tournament after Oscar's party, so there was no way he could get more answers out of Brian - which was super annoying, Peter thought.

He hadn't seen MJ in a few days either. She'd gone upstate to visit her grandparents with her Dad and Peter knew she only got back home last night.

The subway ride was super uncomfortable.

Peter tried not to cough on everyone near him and he felt like he had gotten through ten packets of tissues by the time he got to school.

He did what May told him to do - he walked in and headed straight for his locker. School felt different in the last few days. The senior table had sort of dissipated and it was all thanks to Oscar's party. Now, everybody didn't really know who to trust.

Peter sniffed as he opened his locker, piling his books into his bag. If he was going to be stuck at home for God knows how long, there was no way that he wasn't going to study for his finals.  
Especially after that _dreadful_ 85 on his Physics  midterm.

"Yo, Peter."

Peter turned around to see Oscar standing behind him. He was wearing a bright green 'Gucci' jumper and black trousers, making his hazel eyes stand out even more.

"Hey." Peter croaked, before coughing, yet again.

"Woah, are you sick?" Oscar asked, shoving his hands in his pocket.

Peter nodded.

"I just came to get my stuff." He smiled.

"Well, get well soon." Oscar said, smiling a little, before running a hand through his hair. "We should hang out some time, dude."

Peter wasn't sure. He really hadn't 'hung out' with anyone except Ned since Freshman year.

"Yeah..." Peter said, a bit tired now. "Sure."

"Cool." Oscar said. "Maybe we could go go-karting. My mom knows this really cool dude with a huge track. Feel free to bring anyone you want...what about Sunday?"

Peter wasn't really listening. He was starting to get a massive headache.

"Sounds cool, Oscar." Peter sighed, shutting his locker. "I'll see you around."

Oscar popped some gum in his mouth.

"See ya, Parker." He said, before patting Peter on the shoulder then turning to walk in the other direction.

He kind of liked how Oscar wasn't like any of the other seniors. Sure, he was rich and super smart, but he kind of saw everybody else on his own level, which Peter really appreciated.

When Peter got back home, he felt like he'd been through a washing machine.

"Oh, honey." May said, walking up to Peter and putting her hands on his cheeks. "I told you to wear a proper jacket-"

"May, I'm fine." Peter winced.

"How do you feel?" May asked.

"Cold. And achy." He replied.

May nodded, before sighing.

"You need to lie down." She said. "Go to your room and get changed into some warm clothes. I'll bring you some hot lemon and honey...I also went down to the pharmacy and got you some painkillers."

Peter sighed. He wished May didn't make such a big deal about everything, but he also knew it was because she cared, so he just did what he told her to.

He got changed into some sweats then climbed into bed. And May made him some honey and lemon tea and placed it by his bedside. She even put a diffuser in his room. Then she made him take some Advil.

"Thanks May." Peter said.

He sat up and managed to drink half of the tea then lay back down. He was glad May convinced him to stay home because he was truly sick - and exhausted. He lay on his back, his eyes half open.

"Get some sleep, honey." May said, kissing his forehead. "I'll be back in a few hours."

Peter fell asleep almost instantly. He was shivering slightly, and he could also hear the sound of his heart beating in his head.

He was woken up by the sound of the door, creaking open and then shutting.

"Peter." He heard.

Peter opened his eyes to see MJ. He could never mistake her curly hair and stance. He put a hand to his head.

"How'd you get in?" He asked.

"I tried calling you but you didn't answer. So I called May and she told me you were sick. Then I found the key underneath the doormat."

Peter sighed. He was so happy to see her. She was wearing a white Calvin Klein T-shirt and black jeans and those cute white Nike's that Peter knew she occasionally wore to school.

MJ walked over to Peter and and he moved over a little, so she could sit at the edge of the bed, next to him.

She placed her fingers on Peter's neck.

"Yeah, you're really warm." She said, before taking Peter's hand.

"How were your grandparents?" Peter asked, squinting slightly.

"Good." MJ said, looking through Peter's window for a second. "They still think I'm...five..."

Peter smiled.

"Like, how?" He asked.

"They just stay stupid shit...like _have all your teeth fallen out_? It's so fucking funny." MJ laughed.

Peter laughed too, before coughing.

"Hey, don't die on me bro." MJ said, putting her free hand in Peter's curls.

"I'm fine." Peter said. "May was probably so dramatic to you on the phone-"

"She said you were bed ridden and probably couldn't do any 'physical activity'..." MJ said, before laughing.

"What the hell..." Peter said, smiling.

MJ kissed Peter's cheek.

"I wanted to come in here and make you take your clothes off...too bad you're sick." She whispered.

Peter wanted to do the same thing to her.

"Can I get in with you?" She asked him.

"I don't want you to get sick, MJ-"

"Come on, Parker. My white blood cells are fucking beasts - I thought you _knew_ this about me-"

"Obviously not, since you nearly contracted pneumonia a few weeks ago." Peter laughed, but he moved up and MJ climbed in with him nonetheless.

She turned in to face Peter and he put his hand up her T-shirt and touched her back, because he was burning up and she had just come from outside.

"You're so cold." Peter said, as his eyes closed.

MJ put her legs on top of Peter's underneath the covers.

"MJ." Peter sighed, but he was still smiling. "I'd actually like to get some sleep."

He felt her lips on his neck and on his shoulder, his hand still on her back.

He ran his fingers up and down MJ's back slowly till he felt sleepier and sleepier.

And then he fell asleep for about an hour.

When he woke up, he rolled unto his back.

MJ lay on her back too. She was on her phone. She was texting someone but Peter wasn't sure who.

"You okay?" Peter asked her.

MJ put down her phone.

"I was about to ask _you_ the same question, Parker." She said, sitting up. "Are _you_ feeling better?"

"Yeah, kinda." Peter said, rubbing his eyes.

He'd been meaning to ask MJ something, but he couldn't remember what.

Then he remembered.

"MJ, you wanna come go-karting with me and Oscar?" He asked.

MJ pulled out her phone again. Her lips parted slightly.

"MJ?" Peter asked again, slowly sitting up now.   
He felt really cold. "Hello?"

"Peter, I don't want to go." MJ gulped, swinging her legs round and beginning to put on her shoes.

Peter sighed. He knew MJ didn't want anything to do with any of the seniors, but he just wished she'd get out more.

"MJ." Peter said, getting out of bed as well.

He watched her shove her phone into her pocket and tuck a strand of hair behind her ear.

She wouldn't even look at him.

"I promise you, Oscar's a nice guy. He's not like the rest of them, MJ." Peter said, walking towards her. "I think you need a break. From your house, from your Dad-"

"Peter, I have to go." MJ said. "I've already told you, I don't want to go."

Peter swallowed.

"Please." He said again. "For me?"

MJ looked at him, that sad and hurt look in her eyes. He wished he'd never suggested it.

"I have to go, Peter." MJ said again, letting go of Peter's hand. "I'll see you soon."

She walked up to his bedroom door and slipped out. Peter could tell she was tense by how uneven her steps were.

He knew she was mad at him because she didn't even say goodbye properly.

And he also knew that she didn't have to go.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Peter took Ned go-karting instead. And Oscar brought Maya.

"Hey, Peter. Hey Ned." Oscar said, smiling goofily. He was in a tartan red T-shirt and matching jumpers, with Versace boots.

_Oscar looks so cool,_ Peter thought.

Peter had driven over in Aunt May's car and Ned had taken the subway. The sky was getting dark and he was still a _little_ sick, but he wasn't going to pass up go-karting, of course.

They were in a small, white room, about to get a safety briefing, and Oscar had just walked in with Maya. Her blonde hair was in two plaits and she was wearing blue jeans and an 'Astroworld' hoodie.

Peter thought about how MJ would have loved  that hoodie. In fact, he really wished MJ would have been here instead of Ned. He hadn't really spoken to her since she left his apartment, two days ago.

"Hey guys." Maya said, smiling at Ned and barely glancing at Peter.

Oscar put a hand round Maya's waist.

"So...where's the instructor dude?" Ned asked, fiddling with his hands.

Oscar laughed.

"He's coming. I was just talking to him outside." Oscar said, flipping his hair out his face.

Maya turned to face Oscar and kissed him on the cheek.

_I guess they're kind of cute,_ Peter thought.

He also thought about how MJ would have loved this place - she liked to do fun and random things. Peter just didn't understand why MJ wouldn't come out of hiding for once.

Soon, the 'instructor guy' came in. The four of them sat on a bench in front of a screen, as he began to ramble through the safety features. Peter put his hand in his hair. He could _barely_ concentrate. And when it was over, they split into two rooms to get changed. Peter was with Ned, of course.

"Oscar's _so_ rich." Ned chuckled, as he buttoned up his jumpsuit.

"Yeah." Peter replied, sitting down to do up his shoelaces.

"Did you _see_ his shoes?" Ned said. "Peter, they're like 1095 dollars. I checked."

"Yeah." Peter said again.

All he could think about was MJ and how he was slightly pissed that she wasn't here.

Ned sighed.

"What's up, Peter? Is it MJ?" Ned whispered. "Any more updates?"

"Well, I think Brian definitely knows something...but he's gone on that stupid football tour-"

"But, Peter." Ned said. "You don't even know if he was talking about MJ at the party. He could literally be talking about anything."

"True." Peter sighed, standing up. "But I won't know till I ask him. In person."

Peter looked at himself in the mirror of the changing room. He looked good in a jumpsuit, he thought. He'd look even better with MJ standing next to him.

When they were all in their go-karts, Peter made a vow to just enjoy himself. And so he did.

When the light turned green, Peter pushed on the accelerator and sped ahead of everyone else. He was ahead for about half a lap, till Oscar came round and bumped his car to the side.

"Sorry, Parker!" Oscar shouted, before turning and accelerating past Peter.

"Shit." Peter laughed, as he turned around and saw Ned approaching his car.

He started going faster this time, focusing on catching up with Oscar.

He never saw Maya on the track, except for when he lapped her.

In the last two minutes of the race, Peter and Oscar were neck-in-neck, side by side in their karts, coming down the home straight. But Oscar won by about half a second.

"Good race, Peter." Oscar said, smiling as he got out of his kart.

"Damn, I nearly beat you." Peter laughed, bumping fists with Oscar.

Maya stood up out of her kart, taking off her helmet.

"I swear my kart was slow." She sighed.

"Sure, baby..." Oscar laughed, walking up to her and helping her out.

Ned stood up out of his kart and walked up to Peter.

"Yo, you guys were speeding." He said, shoving Peter playfully.

"Try and keep up next time, Ned?" Peter shrugged.

"We should go get milkshakes." Oscar said, walking up to Peter, his green eyes glistening under the bright white lights. "They have a really good food place upstairs."

Maya walked up and put her arms around Oscar's neck.

"Thanks, babe." She said. "It was fun...even though I sucked-"

"Yeah, you really did." Peter laughed.

"Shut up, Peter." Maya smiled, kicking Peter's shoe.

"I lapped you four times." Oscar said, before kissing Maya's hand.

Peter put his arm around Ned's shoulder as they walked back to the changing room, still commenting on how _slow_ Ned was and how he sure even MJ would have beaten him.

When they all got changed back into ordinary clothes, they went upstairs for milkshakes.  
And Oscar was right - the milkshakes were incredible.

They sat in a booth around a table, Ned and Peter on one side and Maya and Oscar on the other. Maya was taking some Snapchats just as Ned spoke.

"Wait, didn't MIT decisions come out this week?" Ned asked.

"Ned..." Peter sighed. "You can't just ask-"

"It's okay." Oscar smiled. "I got in."

"Oh my God." Peter said. "That's amazing. Congrats dude. Why didn't you say anything?"

"It's a bit of a touchy subject, Peter." Oscar said, tapping the table. "Liz got deferred from Harvard, Andrew got rejected from Stanford....I didn't want to start any drama."

_Woah, Andrew got rejected?_ Peter thought.

"And, I'm still so proud of you, babe." Maya said. "I knew you could do it."

She kissed him on the cheek again, before taking a sip of his strawberry milkshake.

"You're so cool, dude." Ned said to Oscar, swirling his straw around. "You've got an amazing fashion sense, a pretty girlfriend and you're going to like, the best college in the world."

Oscar just smiled at Ned, as Maya thanked Ned for saying she was pretty.

"Yeah, it _seems_ like I have a perfect life." Oscar said. "But, I don't. My mom and dad's relationship is fucked up...well...it's because my dad's a dick...we fight all the time...he's a bit psycho. And my older brother is a bit of an outcast - he's addicted to codeine."

Maya turned to look at Oscar, still sipping her milkshake.

"Oh." Ned gulped. "I'm sorry, man."

"It's okay." Oscar laughed, turning to look at Peter now. "I mean....everyone's got their demons."

Peter took another sip of his drink. He had begun to shake his leg underneath the table, a trait that he knew May hated.

"Speaking of demons." Maya sighed. "My mom's back in hospital."

"Really?" Oscar said, putting his hand on Maya's.

"Yeah." Maya said. "She was in remission, but they found more cancer in her leg....so..."

Peter never knew Maya's mom had cancer.

"I'm sorry." Peter said to Maya.

"What about you, Ned?" Oscar asked. "Care to share?"

"Sounds lame..." Ned replied, slowly. "But I'm addicted to gaming - and I'm trying to kind of...stop? And actually socialize. I know that's not a legit demon-"

"No, it _is._ " Oscar nodded, sincerely.

Peter knew his turn was next and he had kind of began to hate this whole conversation.

"You, Peter?" Maya asked, fiddling with her plaits.

Maybe his demon was that he had the same nightmare every other month. Of his parents on a plane to Switzerland, and the pilot announcing that the second engine was about to fail, and his Mom screaming while his Dad held her in his arms. Of his Mom screaming Peter's name and crying, absolutely inconsolable.

Maybe his demon was the guilt he _still_ felt about Uncle Ben. When he came home from school and Aunt May just pulled him into her arms and began to sob. And they had to move out of their house into a small apartment.

Maybe his demon was the fact that he was falling for MJ. And he still felt like he couldn't quite reach her. That he was _so_ close to the truth, yet so far. And the thought of someone hurting her made him lose sleep at night.

"Hey, Oscar. Do you mind if I go?" Peter said, out of the blue. "I kind of promised someone that I'd see them tonight."

"Um...sure." Oscar said, putting a hand behind his neck.

"I'm sorry." Peter sighed, slipping out of the booth. "This was...really fun. Thanks, Oscar. I'll see you around, Ned. You too, Maya."

And with that, he turned around and walked downstairs, then went through the glass doors.

He unlocked his car, got in, and began the fairly long drive to MJ's house.  
  
  
  
  
  


Peter hadn't promised MJ anything.

He kind of just needed an excuse to get out of that uncomfortable conversation, and he suddenly just started to miss her a lot. He hadn't even told her he was coming, but he was determined to get her out of the house tonight.

Even it was just the two of them.

When he rang the doorbell, Walter was at the door, wearing some tracksuit bottoms and a black vest. It was the most 'dressed down' outfit that Peter had ever seen him in.

"Evening, Mr. Jones." Peter said.

"Peter!" Mr Jones, exclaimed, smiling. "You feeling better? MJ told me you were sick a few days ago-"

"Yeah, I'm fine sir. I'm much better now, thank you."

"Well, come on in" Walter said, as Peter walked in through the door.

Peter looked around. No sign of MJ.

"MJ's having a bit of a rough time." Walter sighed. "She's been in her room for basically three days and she doesn't want to talk to anyone."

Peter nodded, before swallowing.

"Um..." He stammered. "I actually was thinking I could take her out to dinner tonight."

"Oh, I'm sure she'd really like that." Walter whispered. "If it's just you two, I don't see why she would say no."

"I just want her to be comfortable." Peter said. "Is it okay if I go up to her room?"

"Sure, Peter. Go on up." Walter said, as he headed over to sit back down on the couch.

Peter climbed the stairs carefully, then he made a right. He knew exactly where MJ's room was now.

It wasn't like he was _nervous,_ he just hadn't seen her in a while. Peter knocked on the door, as when he didn't get a reply, he just made his way in.

He saw MJ lying down in her bed, her hair messy and her laptop in front of her. She looked up at him, then back down at her laptop. Peter sighed before closing the door behind him.

"MJ." He said. "Are you okay?"

MJ didn't reply. She just sat up a little, before continuing to go on her laptop. He wondered why she didn't ask him about his go-karting outing. After all, she had him _and_ Ned on Snapchat.

"What do you want, Peter?" MJ muttered, her eyes still glued to the screen.

"What do I _want?"_ Peter replied, before walking up to MJ's bed and closing the lid of her laptop. "I came here to see _you_ , MJ."

"Great." MJ smiled, sarcastically.

_Now, you're just being a bitch for no reason._ Peter thought.

But he didn't say it, of course.

Peter knelt down by MJ's bed, feeling ridiculous.

"Look." He sighed. "I wanna take you to dinner. To the Thai restaurant May and I always go to. It's on me - and it'll be just the two of us."

MJ turned over to face him, her covers still wrapped around her. Her expression softened a little bit.

"Peter...I don't want to go." She said.

Peter sighed again.

"MJ." He said, raising his voice a little bit "Come _on._ It'll just be us-"

"No, Peter." MJ said. "I don't want to go. Can't you....can't you just respect that?"

Peter stood up now.

"I just...I don't understand." He said, folding his arms. "Why _not_? Do you have cramps or something? Are you sick-"

"No!" MJ shouted, sitting up. "I just don't wanna go!"

At that moment, Walter burst through the door.

"Michelle Jones." He said, his voice stern.

"Peter's offering to take you out. And quite frankly, I'm tired of your _rude_ attitude and your childish behavior. Stop being a brat-"

"Dad!" MJ shouted.

"No!" Walter exclaimed. "Get up, _now!_ And get changed. I do everything for you, MJ! And this is how you repay me? By acting like this? Do you know how many girls would _kill_ to be in your position? Are you even aware of how lucky you are? You're going with Peter-"

"You can't just _force_ me-"

"I don't deserve this, Michelle! I should have let you go with your _crazy_ mother. Since you obviously think she would do a better job than me! If you don't get up right this instant, you can forget about homeschool. I will personally, make sure you are on the next bus to Midtown tomorrow morning, do you hear me? Get dressed."

MJ opened her mouth to say something but no words came out. Instead, tears filled her eyes.

"Now!" Walter shouted again, before walking out and slamming the door behind him.

Peter felt like shit. His heart had begun to beat faster. He should never have come, he thought.

"MJ." Peter said. "It's okay, you don't have to go...I'll go talk to him."

MJ shook her head. She had already stood up, and begun to straighten her bed. He watched as tears began to pour down her cheeks.

"No - don't bother, Peter. You've done enough." She whispered. "You've done _fucking_ enough."

Peter swallowed. He walked up to her, trying to take her hands.

"Hey, MJ." He said. "Look at me-"

MJ shrugged Peter off, before going to open her closet. She grabbed some jeans and a sweater and tossed them on her bed, before slamming the closet door shut.

Peter sat down on MJ's bed, feeling helpless.

"I'm sorry." He said, his throat burning. "I'm sorry he said those things...he didn't mean them.

MJ didn't look at Peter. She walked over to her mirror and pulled her pajama top, up over her arms, taking deep breaths. Then she took off her shorts.

Peter was aware he watching her changing. But he felt so bad, he wasn't even thinking about that. He just wanted her to say something.

"MJ." Peter said again, putting his fingers on his mouth.

MJ put on her sweater, before sitting on the chair next to her mirror to pull on her jeans.

Her cheeks were still wet. When she was dressed, she wiped her tears with the back of hands and grabbed a brush from her vanity and began to vigorously brush her hair.

Peter wanted to stand up and wrap his arms around her, but he was sure that she would just tell him to go away.

So he didn't.

He waited till she had her shoes on, and she had grabbed her bag and her jacket. Then she headed for the door, so Peter just followed her.

MJ made her way downstairs, still looking at the floor. Peter followed her, anxious.

"Do you guys need cash?" Walter asked.

"No." Peter said, firmly. "We're good."

Walter had a remorseful expression on his face. Peter wasn't sure it mattered because MJ wasn't even looking his way.

"I'll bring her back soon." Peter said.

"Don't worry about it, Peter. Take all the time you need." Walter said.

Peter wasn't sure whether that comment was meant to attack MJ or that he genuinely meant that he could take his time.

MJ opened the door and Peter closed the door behind him.

They were silent in the car ride to the Thai restaurant. Peter turned on the radio, hoping MJ would at least hear a song she liked and lighten up but she didn't. She just leant her head on the window, her eyes tired.

Peter just wanted to die. Literally.

He really couldn't believe what her Dad said to her. And he couldn't understand why she was acting like this.

When they got to the restaurant, the restaurant owner recognized Peter because him and May came there so much, and she said that him and MJ could have anything they wanted for free.

Then she showed them to their table - it was the table that May and Peter usually sat at. She handed them both menus, before lighting the candle in the centre.

"Thank you." Peter said, glad that he could at least talk to someone.

MJ ran a hand through her hair, before putting her head in her palm. She didn't even look at the menu.

"MJ." Peter said. "You have to eat something."

"No, I don't." MJ replied.

Peter wasn't even expecting her to say anything. He tried so hard not to roll his eyes.

He want sure if he was more angry at himself, or at the way she was acting.

"Look, I said I'm sorry, okay?" Peter said. "I didn't know he was going to freak out-"

"Yeah, you don't really know much about my Dad, do you?" MJ said, her voice cold.

She sat up in her chair, before staring into the distance.

When the waiter came round, Peter ordered everything. A pink lemonade for MJ, and the usual food that him and Aunt May always liked to order.

When the food came, MJ ate a little bit. She just stared down at her food, and didn't really ever look up at Peter. Peter asked her about other things, like her homework and her therapist and she just nodded or shook her head or said 'mm hmm'. Nothing more than that.

When they finished, Peter led the way back to May's car. MJ got in next to him, putting on her seatbelt.

"Please don't take me home." She said, finally looking over at Peter.

Peter looked over at her, one hand on the steering wheel.

_Why are you acting like this, MJ?_

He really wanted to scream at her.

_No, MJ! I'm taking you straight back home! I'm done with all this bullshit - all the lies...and you treating everyone who's trying to help you like shit._

But he didn't.

"So where do you wanna go?" Peter simply said.

"To your apartment, maybe?" MJ sniffed. "Anywhere. Just not home."

Peter turned the key and the engine started. He didn't look back at MJ because he was mad, but he drove her back to his apartment. And May wasn't home, because Peter knew that she was working a night shift.

But Peter _wanted_ her to be home so she could ask what was wrong and he could complain about MJ to her.

They walked into Peter's room and MJ kicked off her shoes before sitting at the edge of his bed.

"Peter?" MJ said.

They had switched roles. Peter took off his shoes and tossed them to the other side of his room, ignoring her.

He sat on the other side of his bed, away from her, beginning to take off his watch.

MJ stood up and sat next to him. She put a hand on his lap and he flinched a little bit.

"Please, can you just....not?" Peter started, not even looking at her.

"I _know_ you're mad." MJ said, still looking at him. "What my Dad said wasn't your fault and I'm sorry I made you feel like that."

"Well...I'm tired of you apologizing." Peter said.

He sighed, throwing his head back a little and closing his eyes.

"I know..." MJ said. "It's just...."

"It's just what, MJ?" Peter nearly shouted.

"I don't know what else to say!" MJ shouted back.

"Then please...don't say anything else." Peter said, before looking down at the floor.

There was a small silence. And Peter thought about how helpless he felt. How he wanted the ground to open up and swallow him up.

MJ put his hand on his. And he didn't shrug her off. He let her hold his hand. He let her kiss his cheek then he let her kiss him. He even kissed her back a bit.

He put her hands in her hair and she put his arms around his neck, and they kissed, whilst he was tense and he couldn't ignore the frustration he was feeling.

Then he broke away. He didn't look at MJ, he just lay down on top of his bed, exhausted.

MJ stared at Peter, that blank expression on her face.

She leaned over Peter and kissed him again, slowly. Peter closed his eyes. He could barely think. MJ put her hands on his shoulders, running them down his arms, before taking his hands and placing them on her hips.

Then she kissed Peter, this time, climbing on top of him, her knees either side of his hips and her breath quickening.

Peter was so conflicted. He was hurting too.

He was hurting so badly that he didn't even know that having sex with MJ could fix it.

Peter broke away, and MJ looked at him, confused.

"MJ." He said, their faces still so close to each other. "I need to take you home."

"No you don't, Peter." MJ replied.

"I'm not gonna do this right now." He said, trying to sit up.

MJ sat up now.

"What do you mean?" She asked.

"I mean...I don't wanna _fuck_ you, MJ." Peter said, raising his voice. "I'm taking you home."

MJ swallowed. She stood up now, walking to grab her shoes. Peter couldn't tell if she was sad or angry.

He didn't want to have sex with her.

He didn't even want to look at her.

All he wanted was for her to tell him the truth.

 


	12. A Shitty Drawing

Peter didn't think he'd ever been in a bedroom as big as Oscar's. A chandelier hung from the centre of the ceiling, and there was a fish tank built into one of the walls. On a white shelf was his never-ending collection of designer shoes, and his large king-size bed had a control system that could incline and recline it.

On the walls, there were several framed certificates from all the awards Oscar had won, including his M.I.T acceptance letter. A plasma TV was placed on a dresser and had an Xbox connected to it.

Ned and Peter had been invited to Oscar's house that afternoon so he could help them with Chemistry.

Oscar had never gotten less than a 95 in the class throughout his high school career - apparently - and was willing to help Peter and Ned when they asked. Their finals were coming up and Peter was not about to let his GPA slip again.

It was weird seeing his place in non-party mode, Peter thought. It was relatively quiet and Oscar's dad wasn't home - just his mom and his little sister Jada, who was only twelve.

Peter soon learned that Oscar had his own private study room in his house - it was filled with a library of textbooks and had an interactive smart board. Peter and Ned were sat there at the end of a long table staring at a test paper, whilst Oscar tried to explain the answers to them.

"Umm..." Oscar said, biting the end of his pen.

Peter also learned that he often did that when he was thinking.

"This looks like a disproportionation reaction...so like...you wanna see where the elements change in oxidation states..."

Peter leaned in to see what Oscar was scribbling down on the paper in front of him. He didn't really have a clue what he was talking about.

"Oh I get it..." Ned said nodding. "Copper has three different oxidation states so it's definitely disproportionation..."

Peter just sighed and shook his head.

"I still don't understand..." he said, trying to concentrate.

"We haven't even got to the hard part yet..." Oscar said, laughing a little and pushing his long-ish hair away from his face. "Here...start with these simple exercises and then try to go from there. Ned, you can move on to the next chapter."

Peter kind of hated this.

He _liked_ hanging out with Oscar and being in his huge house and getting to spend time with Ned, but he didn't like that Ned was always better than him at Chem, and _he_ sucked.

He'd pretty much gotten through the whole class this semester by copying Ned's practical notes and asking other people for help.

He sighed again before pulling a textbook towards him and attempting the questions in there. Just like Oscar had suggested, it got easier as he did more practice.

Peter didn't know what brand of white T-shirt and grey sweats Oscar was wearing, but he was pretty sure that they were designer, like the rest of his clothes. He even had a Cartier bracelet on.

The door of Oscar's study suddenly opened and Jada, Oscar's sister, poked her head round. She had the same hazel eyes as him and long, tangled brown hair that fell past her shoulders. She was wearing a navy blue Ralph-Lauren sweater-dress and black Fendi slides.

"Jada..." Oscar said, annoyed. "You didn't even knock."

"I don't have to knock because it's like... _my_ house as well..." Jada said matter-of-factly. "Mom told me to ask you guys if you want Henry to make your lunch yet."

It took Peter a few seconds to realize that Henry was their chef and there was a delicious smell seeping from the kitchen downstairs into the study.

"Yeah whatever..." Oscar said, looking at Ned and Peter. "You guys hungry? Henry makes amazing burgers..."

Peter and Ned just nodded, and Peter was in awe of the fact that Oscar could just request _anyone_ to make him _anything_ whenever he wanted.

"We want food..." Oscar said, looking at Jada. "Run and tell Henry, chop chop..."

Jada rolled her eyes.

"I'm done with running errands for you Oscar..." she said. "And you better clean your room before Dad gets home tonight."

"And what if I _don't_?" Oscar said, chuckling to himself.

"Then he'll start yelling..." Jada continued. "And _you'll_ start yelling, and I won't be here to hear it."

" _Okay_...geez..." Oscar said, throwing his head back in frustration. "I'll clean my fucking room, can you piss off now, please?"

Jada didn't say anything as she disappeared, slamming the door behind her.

"She's so annoying..." Oscar muttered, picking up his pen and starting to bite it again, as he concentrated on reviewing Peter's work.

"Is your dad away...on work?" Ned asked.

Peter was about to protest and tell Ned to stop digging, but Oscar had already answered his question.

"He was in Germany on a business trip for a few weeks. He's coming home tonight which means I'll basically lose all my freedom."

"That sucks..." Ned said, pitifully.

"He's such a _dick..."_ Oscar continued. "He makes it clear that he loves Jada and wants nothing to do with me. As long as I do well in school and go to an amazing college, he literally doesn't care. It's like...not even having a dad at all..."

"I know what it's like..." Peter said. "It's always just been me and May."

Peter thought about how different Oscar was to any guy he'd probably met in his life. How he didn't try to conceal his problems, and how he was always open to talk about them with other people.

"That's exactly what's it's like..." Oscar said. "It's just me, my sister and my mom. Dad doesn't _get_ me, he thinks I'm just an odd, smart kid. And he's highkey homophobic. In my Freshman year...at my last high school, I kissed this boy..."

Peter looked up at him and watched as Ned's eyes widened as well.

"You kissed a boy?" Ned said. "I thought you were-"

"Oh, that's like society's _main_ issue..." Oscar interrupted, smiling a little. "We just assume that everyone's straight. And even if I was _straight_ , what's wrong with making out with a boy? And yes, I'm the smart guy that _should_ like girls, and yes, I'm currently fucking Maya Gardner...but I'm bisexual. There you go."

Peter's heart sank a little because he saw Oscar look down a bit as if he was a tiny bit embarrassed, but then he laughed in the goofy way he usually did again and Peter thought that maybe he didn't really care what other people thought of him.

"That's really cool..." Ned said, smiling, and Oscar smiled back at him. "Have you told anyone at school yet?"

"I mean...I don't care if they know, but I haven't got round to telling anyone..." Oscar said.

Peter looked at Oscar as he started dictating some more Chemistry to Ned. He thought about how comfortable Oscar must have felt in their company to confide in them like that, and how the other guy seniors at Midtown probably wouldn't understand.

After a few minutes, Oscar's mom called them all down for lunch and just like Oscar had said, the burgers that his chef had made were amazing.

They all sat around a big dining table with Jada. She had her headphones on while she ate and was watching YouTube videos on her phone. Oscar's mom sat down next to them.

"This is so good..." Peter said, as he took his first bite. "Thank you, Sara..."

"Oh, it wasn't me dear..." Oscar's mom replied. "It's all thanks to Henry..."

Oscar took a sip of his water before licking his fingers.

"Are you guys going to the committee meeting on Saturday?" Oscar asked, looking at Ned and Peter.

"What meeting?" Peter asked, frowning.

"Oh, I should have told you..." Oscar began. "Liz is organizing this Winter Formal for charity at the end of the semester. It's really just to rank up her honors for college..."

"Honey..." Sara sighed, looking at Oscar and implying that he shouldn't say that.

"Anyway..." Oscar continued. "I'm on the committee for planning the whole thing and you guys are definitely on it too. I saw your names on the list."

"Seriously?" Ned asked. He was clearly amazed that Liz had selected him to be part of it, Peter thought.

"We're having a meeting this weekend at school and we're going to check out the venue and stuff...you guys should be there..." Oscar said.

Peter thought about how much studying he had to do and was about to hesitate, but then remembered that the committee would probably be filled with a bunch of other seniors, and that this increased his chances of getting more answers.

"We'll be there..." Peter nodded.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


"Peter!" May shouted.

She was sat in front of the TV in their apartment watching the season finale of Keeping up with the Kardashians, and had just got to an interesting part of the episode.

"What happened?" Peter asked, running up to the couch and climbing over it to sit down next to May. He had just freshly washed his hair and was getting ready to go to bed after an evening of studying. He wasn't sure if he was even going to go to that committee meeting tomorrow because he was so tired.

"Tristan cheated on Khloe..." May said, biting her nails.

"Are you fucking kidding me?" Peter exclaimed, staring at the screen.

"Peter..." May hissed. "Language."

"Sorry..." Peter said, his eyes still glued to the TV. "Khloe needs to get out of Cleveland and back to L.A."

He actually really loved getting to watch Keeping Up with May on a Friday evening, because she always made microwaveable popcorn, they always had debates about which Kardashian sister they preferred, and May would always do a running commentary that made Peter laugh.

He was about to reach into the bowl of popcorn and grab another handful when he heard a knock on the door.

He climbed over the couch and went over to answer it, before opening it and seeing MJ standing there...with a bouquet of roses.

Peter looked at MJ, then down at the roses, then back over at May, then sighed.

"What are you doing here?" He said, quietly.

MJ shrugged. She looked genuinely sad, Peter thought.

"Coming to apologize for...sucking...as a human being in general..." MJ replied, her voice sounding slightly tired. "I picked these up for you on my way here so...I'm sorry..."

Peter took the flowers slowly before finally making eye contact with her. Her hair fell down her shoulders in the way that he usually liked.

"Come in..." He said, letting MJ enter. "May and I were kinda watching something."

"Actually...it's finished now..." May called from the couch, standing up and switching off the TV. "Hi MJ..."

"Hi..." MJ replied, smiling. "I brought these flowers for Peter to say sorry...I...was acting really douchey a few days ago..."

Peter looked at her and wondered where she got the courage within herself to own up to her mistakes like that.

May smiled.

"Oh sweetie, I see..." she said, sliding on her fluffy slippers and tightening her dressing gown around her waist. "I'm just heading back into my room now so I'll give you two time to talk about it..."

"May-" Peter hesitated.

"Just _talk_ through your feelings..." May said, walking past them both and tapping Peter's shoulder. "It's the healthy thing to do in any relationship."

" _Okay,_ May..." Peter sighed, making it clear that he was irritated now.

He wasn't sure what to make of the fact that she just called them a couple.

May left the room and Peter and MJ sort of just stood there for a few seconds, before turning to look at each other at the same time.

Peter looked away, before placing the flowers down carefully on the kitchen table.

"Let's talk then..." he said, gesturing towards the couch.

MJ looked nervous and hesitant and first but then she followed Peter to sit down.

"I'm sorry..." MJ began again, her voice remorseful. "I was being such a bitch the other day...and I know you were trying to help me...it's just... _so_ difficult for me go out and enjoy myself - it feels like all this anxiety I have is taking over my life."

At that moment, he felt sorry for her, and he felt bad that he even tried to take her out that day in the first place.

"But there's this committee meeting for the Winter Formal tomorrow..." MJ continued. "Which apparently we're both on...so I'll come with you."

Peter's mind flashed back to that day when MJ was on her bike and how _sad s_ he was and how _sad_ those same people had made her.

"You don't have to do that..." Peter said, shaking his head. "I know how much you hate that place."

MJ looked at him straight in the eyes.

"I'm gonna do it, for you, Peter..." she said, sounding quite intimidated by the prospect of it herself. "I'm gonna go and I'm not gonna give a shit about what anyone else has to say about me..."

"Are you sure, MJ?" Peter asked.

She nodded, and without much thought, Peter leant in to kiss her.

MJ kissed him back, and when they stopped, Peter wrapped his arms around her as they both lay back on the couch. He could smell lavender in her hair, and it reminded him of the weekend he spent at her house.

"I forgive you..." he said, looking at her. "And I'm sorry if I was trying to force you to do things you didn't want to do..."

 _Or say anything you weren't ready to say,_ Peter thought.

MJ sighed, taking Peter's hand.

"It's not your fault..." she said. "It's just that..."

Her voice trailed off and Peter looked at her.

"It's just what?" He said, softly.

MJ sighed.

"It's nothing..." she said, stroking Peter's arm with her fingers.

 _What happened to you, MJ?_ He thought.

He pulled her closer again. She looked as if she might cry.

"You can tell me anything, MJ..." Peter said. "You know that right?"

MJ looked at him with her tear-filled eyes and nodded.

"I know that..." she said quietly, before sniffing.

"Sometimes...I don't think you do..." Peter replied.

He almost thought that she was looking at him as if she was about to say something, but then she just put her head against his chest.

"I don't like seeing you upset..." Peter said quietly. "God...it literally _kills_ me inside every time I see you cry...and I hate going to school and sitting in Physics and you not being there...and I hate how you feel scared to go out and do the things you used to love doing..."

Tears stung at the back of Peter's eyes.

"I love you, MJ..." he said, impulsively.

He felt MJ take a silent intake of breath and then she looked up at him.

"What?" she whispered.

"I love you, MJ..." Peter said again. "I never thought I'd be saying that...but it's the way I feel..."

Peter felt his voice trail off again.

_I don't think you love me yet, MJ._

And he didn't. He didn't think MJ loved him back because if she did...she would just tell him what happened that night. She would say exactly what she felt, and she would say who hurt her. She wouldn't run away from the people who really cared about her, and she wouldn't feel scared to share her thoughts.

Peter felt how warm her body felt against him.

"You don't have to say you love me back..." Peter said. "I just thought I'd let you know."

There was a silence as Peter held her and he thought about all the things he wanted to do differently. He wished he had loved MJ sooner.

He wished that he had got to take her out, and kiss her and love her the way he did before the _senior_ table existed. Before school became this battle of survival and before the prospect of being respected by everyone else had consumed their lives.

MJ slowly sat up, releasing herself from Peter's hold.

"I should probably go..." she said, wiping a tear now from her face with her sweater. "I guess I'll see you tomorrow before the meeting...will you pick me up?"

"Sure..." Peter said, looking at her intently. She was so fragile and delicate and he wanted to just hold her forever.

"Okay..." MJ said, reaching over to put her bag over her shoulder.

She stood up and looked like she was about to leave, but then sat back down again and took Peter's hand.

"I'm so lucky..." she said, before standing up and heading towards the door. "That you were here...when I needed someone..."

Peter didn't know what she meant by that, though he was touched by what she said. He knew that some people were worth being with even though they were hard to figure out...and he knew MJ was one of them.

And he couldn't help it. He was now falling completely in love with her. He knew she had flaws, but he loved her regardless. He loved how imperfect and perfect she was all at the same time.

It was like a never-ending fall.

"Bye, Peter." MJ whispered, as she shut the door behind her.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


It was a Saturday morning and for once, the halls of Midtown High were empty. There were no bells ringing and there were no people in large groups gossiping away.

It was better that way, Peter thought. It was nice for him and MJ to come into school and not worry about other people's eyes following them, or hearing distant whispers.

Peter had picked MJ up from her house that morning and driven her to school in May's car. He couldn't help but feel bad that she had stepped out of her comfort zone just to make him happy, and he was now regretting ever coming to the meeting.

He was holding her hand as they were about to walk into a classroom filled with the other committee members, many of whom's faces Peter knew that MJ dreaded seeing. The worst thing was that he could literally feel her shaking next to him.

"You okay?" Peter asked turning round to look at her.

MJ nodded.

She was was wearing the same Astroworld hoodie that she'd taken the Physics midterm in and black leggings. Her grey converse matched Peter's which was unintentional on his part.

Peter tried not to make a big deal out of opening the door and walking into the classroom with MJ. It was semi-loud, as everyone was talking, and he could see Liz standing in front of the class setting up some kind of PowerPoint.

He looked at MJ again, who was just focused on trying to find a seat. Peter thought that it was pretty unlucky that the desks were arranged in a large U-shape, so it was almost impossible for her to disappear and avoid looking at everyone.

He recognized a few of the seniors who had sat down - Maya, Brian, Emily...including Flash and some other Juniors - no sign of Ned or Oscar, or Andrew though. The seniors and their squad were still divided amongst themselves because of what happened, but stayed talking in their little groups.

As Peter and MJ sat down next to each other, the chatter seemed to die down a bit and Peter knew that it came as a shock to everyone to see MJ there.

Peter was _glad_ when Liz came up to them both and pulled a chair up to sit next to them.

"Hey guys..." she said, cheerfully. "It's nice to see you again, MJ."

"Thanks..." MJ replied, her voice sounding just shaky enough for Peter to notice it.

"I put people in the committee that I knew were reliable..." Liz said, handing them some sheets that had her PowerPoint slides printed out on them. "We'll start in a few minutes but I'm just waiting for a couple more people to arrive."

Liz smiled at them again before standing up and returning to the front of the class.

Peter looked at MJ - she was doodling on the piece of paper Liz had just given her, in true MJ-style.

"I'm okay, Parker..." she said, softly, continuing what she was doing.

Peter wasn't sure if she was just saying that to make him feel less anxious or if she actually felt comfortable being around all these people again.

He wanted to kiss her on the cheek and hold her hand, but Peter wasn't sure about how MJ felt about the whole PDA thing yet.

All of a sudden, the door opened again and Oscar walked in, followed by Ned. Oscar was wearing a red matching set of a Supreme sweater and sweats, complete with black Nike's.

Everyone seemed to go quiet. Partly because they were in awe about what Oscar was wearing, Peter thought, and partly because they couldn't believe that he had befriended Ned.

"Sorry Liz..." Oscar said, putting his backpack down on a chair. "I had to pick Ned up..."

Liz just sighed before handing them the same sheets she had given Peter and MJ.

"At least you're not last..." she said, shrugging. "We're still missing half of the Juniors..."

The classroom grew loud again and Peter made eye contact with Ned, who smiled at him. Ned waved at MJ and she forced a smile back at him too.

Oscar noticed Peter and walked up to where him and MJ were sitting, leaning on Peter's desk with his arm.

"Hey Peter..." Oscar said. He was chewing gum like he always did. "Sweet...you actually came."

"Yeah..." Peter said. "Figured I didn't wanna disappoint Liz so..."

Peter watched as Oscar looked at MJ, who looked up at him quickly and then back down to her desk, concentrating profusely on what she was drawing and not saying anything.

"Is this your girlfriend, Peter?" Oscar said, his voice sounding genuinely confused.

Peter didn't know why he almost said yes at that moment. MJ had never really _called_ him her boyfriend in public, even though they acted like they were a couple when they were around each other.

"I don't think you've met MJ yet..." Peter said. "MJ, this is Oscar. He's new at Midtown."

"Hey." MJ mumbled, looking up at him again and then back down at her drawing, not saying anything else.

Oscar chuckled to himself quietly before crouching by MJ's desk so that he could see what she was doing.

Peter's heart skipped a beat.

He knew that MJ probably didn't wanna speak to anyone there, but wondered why she couldn't just introduce herself properly.

"What are you drawing?" Oscar asked MJ, looking down at her piece of paper.

He was smiling in that way that made Peter  
want to die again.

"Nothing..." MJ said quietly, the movements of her hand on her pencil getting quicker now.

Peter wanted to interrupt but he felt like Oscar would be nice to MJ anyway so he didn't say anything.

"You've got some great artistic skills there..." Oscar said. "I can add some stuff to it if you want...I'm not the best at drawing but I can try..."

Oscar reached over to MJ's hand to take the pencil from her and she flinched, but then dropped it quickly and let him start drawing on her paper.

Peter could see that she had that blank expression on her face and he couldn't tell what she was feeling.

"There..." Oscar said, finishing scribbling on MJ's sheet. "I tried to draw a dog...it's a pretty shitty drawing compared to yours..."

Oscar pushed back his hair out of his face again before looking at MJ, who didn't look back at him.

"So you're...MJ, right?" he said. "You're really pretty..."

And with that, Oscar stood up and made his way to sit next to Ned, who was fully engaged in conversation with Emily.

Peter looked over at the drawing that Oscar had completed.

"That's cool..." Peter said, smiling at MJ, but she didn't say anything back. She just fiddled with her pencil and stared at the floor.

"MJ, are you okay?" Peter asked, but at that exact moment Liz had called everyone's attention and was beginning to explain the PowerPoint that she had displayed on the screen in front of them.

"So...the Winter Formal is in aid of Hope for the People..." Liz said. "We're tryna sell tickets to students at Midtown and other nearby schools too..."

Liz's voice trailed off in Peter's head, because all he could think about was MJ, and if she was okay. He wanted to concentrate, but he kept looking at her. He kept seeing her stare aimlessly at the screen in front of her, and then back down at the floor again. He kept seeing her sigh and tuck her curls behind her ear, and pull on the sleeves of her hoodie.

"Where's Tyler?" Some Junior asked, raising up his hand.

"He's suspended." Emily replied, sighing. "They found drugs in his locker."

No one even batted an eyelid. Was that why Tyler was at therapy?

Was that why he was putting stuff in people's drinks at Liz's party?

The presentation that Liz gave seemed to go on forever in Peter's mind, and after they had all sat there for twenty five minutes, he was pretty sure that he had absorbed none of the information that Liz was communicating and he was pretty sure that MJ hadn't either.

"Any suggestions?" Liz asked, finally finishing and turning round to look at everyone.

Peter wasn't even sure what she was talking about.

Peter looked at MJ again, and didn't think he'd ever seen her this distressed. She just kept fidgeting and he wondered if it had something to do with the fact that she was intimidated by the people around her, or if she just didn't feel well.

" _You_ look a little stressed." Flash said, as he turned to MJ, clicking his pen.

"Come over and sit next to me, MJ." Brian laughed. "You can sit on my lap if you want-"

"Shut up, Brian." Liz snapped, rolling her eyes, before carrying on with the conversation.

Peter wanted to scream at them. But he didn't want to make a scene and make things worse.

He watched as MJ sighed heavily, before standing up, grabbing her bag and walking out of the classroom.

"MJ..." Peter started, but she had already left.  
He looked over at Brian and Flash who were now laughing for some reason.

"Do you think that's funny?" Peter asked angrily.

Peter stood up and rolled his eyes before making his way out of the classroom to follow MJ. His mind flashed back to that day when the huge fight broke out in the cafeteria and he couldn't bear the thought of re-living that whole experience again.

He looked down the hallway and saw MJ leaning against her locker and crouching over, with her hands resting on her knees. She looked as if she'd just run a marathon, Peter thought.

"MJ, what's wrong?" Peter said, walking over to her and putting a hand on her shoulder.

"I'm gonna be sick..." MJ said, leaning over.

"I can take you back home-"

"I'm sorry..." MJ said, crying now. "I couldn't stay in there..."

"Hey, it's okay..." Peter said, running his hands through her hair. "It's not your fault."

He couldn't fully understand what was wrong with her, but he knew that he had to get her to a bathroom.

He was glad that practically no one was in school that day, because he followed MJ into the girls' bathroom and held her hair out of her face as she threw up.

It was a complete role reversal from the night of Liz's party. He was the one rubbing her back and helping her stand up, and watching as she splashed cold water on her face.

"I'm gonna take you home..." Peter said, as MJ stared at herself in the bathroom mirror.

"I'm sorry..." MJ said again.

"MJ, you don't need to apologize..." Peter said, raising his voice and then lowering it again. "The meeting really doesn't mean that much to me...and I'm glad you offered to come in the first place. So I'm not mad, and you don't need to be sorry. Okay?"

MJ looked at Peter and then nodded.

And so, he took her home. The drive all the way back to her house was completely silent. MJ didn't feel like saying anything and Peter didn't either. He couldn't help but think that she was so anxious sitting in that room of people, that it made her physically unwell.

After dropping her off at her house, he just wanted to go home, but Liz had sent him a text.

' _Hope MJ's okay. We're looking at the venue for the Formal if you still want to come. I'll send you the address'_

Peter sighed. He _really_ wanted to go home and forget that he'd even gone to the stupid meeting, but part of him still wanted to give Brian and Flash a piece of his mind, so he got in May's car and drove there.

He pulled up at an abandoned hall and he could see everyone on the committee standing around and Liz talking to them.

He got out of his car and shut the door behind him, as their heads turned to look at him.

"Is MJ okay?" Ned said, looking at Peter.

"Yeah...she's fine..." Peter sighed. "She just felt sick so she had to go home."

Peter looked over at Brian who looked like he was stifling a laugh again.

"What part of this is so fucking funny to you?" Peter shouted.

He knew that Brian was still kinda mad at him for making him look like an idiot at Oscar's party.

"I never would have expected you and MJ to be together..." Brian said, mockingly. "It's the most unlikely pairing ever, but whatever-"

"Shut up-" Peter started.

"MJ literally opens her legs up for anyone these days..." Brian continued, walking up to Peter and looking down at him.

"Can you guys stop?" Liz shouted. "Brian, leave him alone..."

"You're a fucking asshole..." Peter said, between gritted teeth. "Do you know that?"

Brian pushed Peter's shoulder with one hand.

"Why don't you tell everyone else here the truth, Brian?" Peter continued. "Maybe I _am_ onto you. Maybe _you_ know what happened to MJ that night, and maybe that's why she can't come to school! Because of you!"

Peter wasn't prepared for when Brian's fist collided with his face and he was knocked to the ground. He couldn't see properly for a second, but everyone was shouting stuff and someone had pulled Brian away from him.

"It wasn't me!" Brian shouted, as someone held him back.

 _What is he talking about?_ Peter thought.

"You're trying to find out the truth?" Brian screamed again. "You're trying to play detective Peter? Maybe you should refresh your memory, because _you_ were there!"

Peter wiped some blood away from his face before looking up. Liz was crouched down next to him.

"Peter..." she said, looking worried. "Peter, are you okay?"

"You were there, Parker!" He heard Brian still shouting. "You were there!"

Peter's mouth felt numb.

His heart began to race. He spat out some blood in his mouth unto the floor, just as Liz scrambled for some tissues - and he couldn't ignore the pain he was feeling.

He couldn't ignore Brian's voice, even as some juniors tried to hold him back.

You were there, Parker!

_You were there!_

 


	13. Promise Me

"Peter, I think you need to go." Liz said, passing Peter some more tissue.

He had a small cut on the side of his mouth and he was gargling salt water in the bathroom of the venue.

"Yeah..." Peter sighed, before spitting out blood stained water into the sink.

He was still trying to process everything that Brian had said to him...and it still didn't feel _real._

_No. Surely Brian is lying._

"Peter, what's going on between you and Brian?" Liz asked, folding her arms. Her black sleek hair was still perfectly falling against her shoulders, even in the midst of Peter's chaos.

Peter just shook his head. Then he turned to her, leaning on the edge of the sink.

"Is Tyler really in trouble?" He asked, aware that he was blatantly ignoring her question.

Liz shrugged.

"I saw him get called into Principal Monet's Office. I mean, that's what he gets for leaving drugs in his locker. What an idiot. Now, he's suspended and I haven't seen him since. I mean, he _told_ me he was a stoner-"

"And you didn't help him?" Peter asked, standing upright now. "You didn't bother to maybe ask him where he got those drugs from and why?"

"No..." Liz said, slowly. "It wasn't any of my business-"

"Well, a lot of things seem to be nobody's business around here." Peter said.

Liz just stood there, her lips firmly pursed, her arms folded.

"Well...I've got to get back in there." She said, before clearing her throat. "The event planner's already pissed off, and she looked at me like I was a weirdo when I asked her for _salt_."

Peter smiled now, genuinely.

"So, just leave, Peter?" Liz said, putting a hand on his shoulder. "I don't want you and Brian having another fist fight."

And with that, Liz left the bathroom.

Peter took one look at himself in the mirror and sighed, before tossing the makeshift saltwater bottle in the trash.

He tried to make an account in his head of everything he knew so far about Liz's party.

Tyler was putting stuff in people's drink, Andrew and MJ didn't have sex, someone hurt MJ, it wasn't Brian...Peter was there?

_I was there?_ Peter thought.

It didn't make any sense to him, which is why he chose to ignore it. He swung the bathroom door open and dashed towards the door. As he got back into May's car, Peter decided to call May.

He felt like he was seven again, feeling sick to his stomach when his teacher would make him and all the other classmates draw family trees, and, how he would draw Aunt May and Uncle Ben in place of his parents, and the other kids would comment on how his Aunt and Uncle couldn't possibly have given birth to him, and he would argue back, saying it was possible.

He just wanted to hear May's voice. For her to comfort him and  tell him he was worrying about nothing. But the phone rang and rang and rang.

Peter knew May was working a night shift that evening but there was no reason for her not to be picking up her calls right now. He dialed her number for the seventh time and it just went to voicemail.

He let out a deep breath, leaning on the car window, and staring out into the empty parking lot, before typing a message.

_'May?? Are you okay? Please pick up my calls - I'm worried.'_

No answer. Peter knew she wouldn't be at home at this point. She liked to leave for her shift as early as possible, and she would always pick Tiffany, her co-worker, up from down the block. Then they would drive to work together.

Peter swore under his breath, then started May's car. He didn't even know where he wanted to go or what he wanted to do. Then suddenly, his phone rang. Peter grabbed it and was so relieved to see May's name on the caller ID.

"May!" Peter said. "God, you scared me. I've been trying to call you for-"

"Is this Peter?"

Peter frowned. The voice on the phone sounded different...and croaky.

"Yes, hello?" Peter said, trying not to shout.   
"This is Peter. Peter Parker. This is my Aunt's phone number-"

"Yes, hi Peter. My name is Rose. I'm a nurse at the New York Presbyterian hospital?" the woman said.

It sounded like she was whispering to someone else for a bit.

"Listen, your Aunt is here in the hospital right now. She told me to tell you not to freak out, because it's just a few stitches that she's getting, but she also needs to get an MRI and-"

Peter could barely hold the phone in his hand. A sense of panic surged through him and his heart began to race.

"Wait, what?" Peter exclaimed, interrupting the nurse. "I don't understand, what happened?"

"Your Aunt was driving a friend...to work?" Rose replied, her voice steady. "Apparently, she was on the phone so she wasn't concentrating, but she collided into another car on the freeway...the other party is completely fine..."

Peter's vision began to blur, and he felt that uncomfortable but inevitable ringing sensation between his ears - again.

"I'm sorry..." Peter said, his eyes closing, his head leant on the steering wheel. "Can I...can I come see her? What's the address?..."

"Honey, you're...you're breaking up." Rose said. "What was that?"

"Where's the address?" Peter asked again, his voice shaking.

He listened as Rose talked through directions with him, but he could barely concentrate on her words.

"Okay...okay thank you." Peter said, cutting the call off.

He'd never reversed out of a parking space so quickly in his entire life. He started speeding, his ears still ringing, his heart still beating.

_How could May do this? How could she put her life at risk?_

When Peter arrived at the hospital, he found a parking space and nearly fell out of the car. He ran up to the entrance that Rose had carefully described, ignoring all the people around him.

As soon as he walked in, Peter knew he was in a hospital. The smell of antiseptic, the hustle and bustle of the nurses running around, the white walls.

He felt sick.

"I'm Peter Parker, I'm here to see my Aunt May." Peter said to the receptionist, who was a dark woman with dreadlocks, looking less cheery than he would have hoped.

"Um...we _do_ have a May in the ER ward." She sighed. "Follow my colleague."

Peter turned to see Rose. He knew it was her because she instantly ran up to him.

"Peter? Yes, you're Peter." Rose said, before turning to her grumpy colleague. "We talked on the phone."

She gestured for Peter to follow her, and so Peter did. His steps were fast paced and uneven, and his breath was quick.

They stopped in front of a door now, after walking for what seemed like forever, down endless corridors.

"Your Aunt is in here." Rose smiled, reassuring Peter by putting a hand on his arm. "She's just about to get the MRI scan but I think they're done with the stitches...go on in."

Peter pressed the door handle firmly before swinging the door open. Rose closed the door behind him.

And he saw Aunt May.

She looked pretty similar to how she always did - she had her long black pants and red tank top on and she was sitting on top of a bed. There was an IV injected into her arm and she had three or four stitches on her forehead.

"Peter!" May exclaimed.

Peter walked up to her tentatively, feeling ill.

He gulped as he stood by her side and she grabbed his hand with her free hand.

"I'm so sorry, Peter." May said, looking up at Peter, who was staring back at her blankly. "Peter? Honey, talk to me. Say what you're feeling."

_What the fuck?_ Peter thought.

Peter felt as though he was frozen, like his legs were locked to the ground.

"Why would you do that to me?" He said, tears creeping up behind his eyes.

May sat up a little.

"Peter..." she said, in a low voice. "I know you're upset-"

"May, you could have _died_!" Peter shouted, letting go of her hold. "Why would you do this?"

Aunt May stared back at Peter, her face pale and her lips slightly parted.

"Peter." She said, raising her voice a little.

"No!" Peter shouted, tears streaming down his face. He backed up now, like he couldn't bear to stand next to her. "First Mom and Dad...then Uncle Ben...now you _too?"_

He couldn't believe how badly he was crying, how broken he felt inside. And Peter wondered if this mental breakdown was a result of _everything_ that had happened today, not just this.

"You're all I have May!" Peter exclaimed, his fingers clenching into a fist. "You _know_ that! You're all I fucking have...how _dare_ you...how dare you..."

His voice trailed off and May looked at him shocked, her lips parted.

"You need to calm down, Peter. Come here..." She said. "I made a mistake...I'm sorry, honey....please, I'm begging you."

Peter shook his head slowly, still crying.

"Peter!" May said, raising her voice again. "Come here...everything will be okay."

Peter walked to May and crouched down as she leaned over and wrapped her arms around him.   
He just lay his head on her shoulder. He felt like his whole world was falling apart.

"I'm sorry..." she whispered, stroking his hair with her hand. "I'll never ever leave you, Peter. I promise."

Peter cried into her shoulder. It felt like every other time that he'd cried into her shoulder when he used to wake up with the nightmares as a toddler. When he failed his first midterm. When he got his heart broken in 9th grade. When he rode his bike into a tree. When life was hard. She was _always_ there. And the thought of her not being there made Peter feel weak...and helpless.

"It's okay, honey." Aunt May whispered, her fingers behind Peter's head. "Breathe....I'm here...I'm here."

Peter hadn't had a panic attack in a _long_ time. The last time he'd had one was at Uncle Ben's funeral, as he stood there clutching some flowers in his hand, realizing that he'd lost yet another person he loved.

He stayed in her arms, waiting till his breath had slowed down, and tears were no longer pouring down his cheeks.

"So...what happens now?" He sniffed, breaking the hug slowly.

"They'll keep me in for the night." May said, drying Peter's cheeks with her hand. "Just to do the scan and check everything is okay."

"Okay." Peter said, nodding slowly. "So, do you need me to go grab you stuff from home?"

"No, Peter." May smiled. "Tiffany brought me everything...I'm fine. Tiffany is also fine. She left with her family about an hour ago. And her car is insured.....incase you were wondering."

Peter sighed. He put his hand on Aunt May's shoulder.

"I can stay the night." He said, kneeling down unto his knees, his voice barely a whisper.

May put a hand on his cheek.

"Peter, I'm gonna be okay." She said. "You have finals and you need to get some rest tonight. I want you to go straight back home honey, okay? Nowhere else."

Peter nodded, before putting his forehead on her chest. She placed her delicate hand in his curls.

"You can come see me in the morning, and we'll go home together, okay?" May asked.

"Okay." Peter said, raising his head slowly. He looked at her eyes now.

"I'm sorry." He sniffed, wiping his face with the back of his hands. "I love you."

"I love you too, Peter." May said, before giving him one last hug. "And you have nothing to be sorry about."

That was all Peter needed.

To know that she was safe and that she was okay.

Peter walked out of the hospital and got back into the car. He was pretty sure that his eyes were still red and that his hair was all over the place, but he didn't really care.

He looked down at his phone.

MJ.

_'Hey._ _I'll never stop apologizing but I'm still so sorry about bailing today.'_

He picked up his phone in his hands, and took a deep breath before typing.

_'May was in an accident. She's fine thank God. Just a few stitches. But she's going to have to stay at the hospital over night to get checked up.'_

MJ replied almost instantly.

_'Oh my god peter, I'm so sorry. I'm glad she's fine. Do you need me to come over?'_

Peter didn't know what he wanted. He didn't know if he could look MJ in the eyes. Not after what Brain had told him.

_'Sure.'_ Peter replied.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Peter had gotten into a burgundy hoodie that Ned had given him for his birthday, and some black boxer shorts.

He had made himself some dinner, for once - just some pasta, which he didn't really eat because he couldn't stomach it.

And then he lay down on the couch, staring at the TV, bored.

He kept on texting May and she kept on replying that she was fine and would see him in the morning. He just didn't like the thought of her being in the hospital.

Peter was aware that he could study for his finals but he had never felt more unmotivated.  
He wasn't even sure if MJ was going to come over anymore.

Just as Peter changed the channel for what felt like the seventieth time, there was a knock on the door.

He got up quickly, pushing his hood back with his hand and reaching out to open the door.

He was relieved to see MJ, in her own bright yellow hoodie and grey sweats.

He loved how yellow looked on her.

She didn't say anything to him - she just threw her arms around him, and Peter was glad she did that, because he didn't really have anything to say to her either.

When MJ let go, she stepped in and closed the door behind her.

"Are you okay, Peter?" MJ asked him.

_Not really_ Peter thought.

"Do you wanna sit down?" Peter asked, realizing he had completely ignored her question.

MJ just nodded, following Peter to sit on the couch.

He studied her; her serious yet soft expression, her pursed lips, and her curly long hair...she was just MJ. She was the same girl that used to call him a _loser_ in freshman year and she was the same girl now.

"Why do you watch this trash?" MJ sighed, looking over at the television, while Keeping Up With the Kardashians began to show.

Peter smiled.

"It's not trash." He said, his arms folded, staring at the TV.

"It _is._ " MJ laughed. "But to be honest, I think I'm just jealous of Kim's butt."

"It's actually _so_ good this season. You haven't even seen all the drama between Khloe and Tristan-"

"I don't think I _care."_ MJ said, smiling now.

Peter sighed heavily but he was still kind of smiling.

"Okay...what _do_ you like to watch, then?" he asked.

"I love creepy documentaries. That, or Grey's Anatomy. That's literally all I watch."

He felt MJ turn to look at him. Peter thought about everything that had happened with May earlier.

"I just...freaked out today." Peter sighed, putting a hand to his head. "I completely overreacted when I was with May...I just started screaming at her...and now I feel so shit about it - it wasn't her fault..."

MJ nodded slowly.

"I just don't wanna lose her." Peter said, leaning back on the couch.

"You won't." MJ said, putting her hand on Peter's lap.

"Thanks." Peter smiled, finally looking back at her.

_You were there, Parker!_

Peter heard Brian's voice in his head and felt himself shivering a little bit. He didn't want to ask her about why she panicked so much earlier that day. He didn't want to tell her about the fight he'd had with Brian.

He didn't want to think about the possibility of him having anything to do with what happened to MJ.

He didn't want to think about how he still didn't know who hurt her. He didn't want to think about what Tyler had put in his drink, or how much he had been drinking. He didn't want to remember anything he had supposedly forgotten or hear anything he had supposedly said.

He just wanted to spend time with MJ - the only person right now that he felt that he could be completely normal around.

MJ rested her head on Peter's shoulder.

"My Dad's making me go in to take my finals." She said.

"Do you... _want_ to?" Peter replied.

"I _have_ to. Or else, I'm gonna fail the semester." MJ sighed.

"Well, I haven't really studied." Peter said, looking at the TV. "And no, I'm not just saying that - I'm actually fucked."

MJ looked up at him and he looked back at her.

"Who cares, right?" MJ laughed.

There was a silence in which they both just watched the TV screen. Then MJ started making fun of everybody's outfit and Peter kept telling her to shut up, playfully.

"Peter?" MJ asked, kicking off her shoes.

"Mm?" Peter replied, suddenly feeling tired.

"You know...I _hate_ the whole boyfriend and girlfriend thing. It actually makes me want to gag." She said.

Peter laughed.

"But you're pretty cool." MJ laughed. "So...I think...maybe... _are_ you my boyfriend? I don't know."

Peter's heart skipped a beat.

"You don't know?" Peter asked, turning towards her. He was smiling uncontrollably.

"I know." She said, sincerely.

Peter looked at her, and suddenly, he just felt that same sensation...like the moment wasn't quite real.

She put her hand on his cheek, before swallowing. Peter felt for the remote, turning off the TV.

"I just have so many things I wanna tell you." She said. "But...not right now."

He didn't expect her to say that at all. Peter's heart began to race again.

He even didn't feel like _talking_ to her right now.

"It's okay. Just...take your time, MJ." Peter said, slowly pulling her in closer.

Peter leaned in to kiss her, because he'd been dying to kiss her ever since she walked in and as he kissed her, he felt his heart hurting less and his body relaxing.

MJ kissed him back, laying back down on the couch. She broke away to catch her breath, and  then she looked at him in a way she'd never looked at him before.  Like she was sure she could trust him. Then she put her hands in his hair, before kissing him again, slowly.

Peter leant over her, one hand behind her back and the other on the couch. He thought about how he didn't want to be with anyone else. He pulled her up with his arms, so her knees were either side of his hips and he sat upright, his back against the couch.

Peter's lips parted slightly. He was now a little out of breath.

"Do you need a break, Parker?" MJ asked.

He laughed and he looked up at her as she leant down and kissed him again, smiling against his lips. Then she slowly pulled her hoodie over her head.

Peter moved his hands up her waist - he loved the feeling of her smooth skin on his fingers.

MJ stood up, turned around and sat in between his legs, laying her head on his shoulder, her back on his chest.

Her skin felt warm against his body. He looked down at her and at how beautiful she looked in her bra, as he turned round and put his lips to her neck.

MJ smiled, closing her eyes.

"That...kind of tickles..." she sighed.

Peter stopped for a second.

"Do _you_ need a break?" He laughed, moving her hair away from her face.

"No...you can keep going..." MJ said, sounding more sincere. "Seriously Peter, just do what you were doing before..."

He kissed her neck again, this time more slowly and forcefully. MJ closed her eyes again, her hair falling down beneath her. Peter put his hands below her chest, slowly running them down her stomach and MJ gasped a little bit.

He put his fingers on the rim of her sweats and began to carefully pull them down.

MJ was more comfortable with Peter this time. She felt more relaxed and happy, and Peter liked it that way.

She stood up again, slipping her feet out from inside of her sweats. He watched her now, and as she stood in her underwear, he was desperate to hold her in his arms again. Peter stood up now, before wrapping his arms around her chest and resting his chin on her shoulder.

He just wanted to hold her forever.

She turned around to him, putting her arms around his neck and kissing him.

After she let go of him, Peter took off his hoodie, MJ watching him before staring at his chest.

"Damn, Parker." She muttered.

"Shhh." Peter whispered, pulling her close to him.

He was worried that someone next door would hear them.

"It's okay...if anyone comes in, I'll personally tackle them to the ground..." MJ said, putting her arms back round his neck.

"MJ...why are you _still_ talking?" Peter laughed.

She was so close to him now. Peter felt her stomach on his, her chest on his and then he put his hands on her back, before touching his forehead to hers.

"You're the _best."_ He said.

And he couldn't believe he had said that out loud and that he was _still_ holding her in his arms. Her eyes widened as she looked up at him.

"You're not too bad yourself." She whispered.

And then she put her lips to his, and her hands on his shoulders, walking him backwards till his back hit a wall behind him, sandwiched between a bookcase and May's coat hanger.

Peter leant against the wall and unclipped her bra strap from behind, and watched it fall to the floor. He ran his hands down her back and to her waist, whilst she kissed him, and she was moaning now - and Peter _loved_ hearing her moan.

They made out for a while longer, and Peter had never seen MJ so _desperate_ for him.

He walked forward, lifting her up into her arms with ease, then lay her down on the couch.

Peter climbed on top of her, his knees either side of her hips. He noticed the quick rise and fall of her chest, and the way she restlessly moved her legs around.

_He_ was so desperate for _her._

He didn't realize how much he wanted her till she was lying there, and he kept hearing her say his name softly.

Peter put his lips to hers, before moving down her body, kissing her chest then her stomach.

MJ gasped a little when his lips brushed against his skin, as Peter slid her underwear off her and down her legs.

"Peter." MJ said again, breathlessly.

She looked up at him and their eyes locked for a second.

His heart was racing.

He wanted to do anything to make her happy - so he put his mouth between her legs. Peter didn't realize what he was doing until he was actually doing it...but it made him feel _good._ The sort of good comparable to when the alcohol at the club had made him feel numb.

He felt good when MJ sighed heavily and groaned occasionally, her eyes closed and her head titled back slightly.

Her voice was the only thing he wanted to hear. Her pleasure was _his_ pleasure. When he looked up at her, he still couldn't believe how _perfect_ she was.

And just when he was _sure_ there was pure adrenaline running through his veins, MJ sat up quickly and kissed him helplessly, pushing her fingers through his curls. They were both on their knees now, and then Peter broke away suddenly.

"MJ." He said. "I don't have a condom-"

"I knew you wouldn't fucking have one." MJ sighed, reaching down into the pocket of her sweats.

"You _can't_ be serious." Peter said, as she handed it to him. "You had that in your pocket-"

"Shhh..." MJ said, mocking Peter from earlier.

Peter slid off his boxers, and MJ was watching him intensely, biting her lip, and he realized that he didn't mind at all.

He thought about how _crazy_ this whole thing was.

He thought about how through trying to help MJ, he had fallen madly in love with her. He used to care about what everyone else thought about him but now the only opinion that mattered to him was hers, and hers alone.

It _was_ weird, Peter thought.

Since Uncle Ben passed, he thought would never love someone else again.

Since, then he'd always thought people weren't loving.

_They love you and then leave you alone, to pick up the pieces._

_But MJ's different._

_She's vulnerable, and funny and caring._

_She's not like the rest of them._

Peter and MJ ended up the carpet.

Peter was laughing because _MJ_ was laughing at _him_ because he could barely put on the condom.

And then Peter had just kind of pulled MJ on top of him and they were both laughing so much, that they had lost focus and slipped off the couch.

"Why is this _so_ hard for you?" MJ laughed, tears nearly coming out of her eyes now.

"Shut up, this is _not_ my fault." Peter said, his voice low. "I'll sit down here...you put your legs either side-"

"Oh my God, Peter Parker." MJ smiled. You are _not_ giving me a sex position class-"

"Shhh..." Peter hissed again. "I mean it."

She did what he said and then he pulled her closer, his hands on her lower back.

He swirled his tongue round her mouth, and she kissed him back, as her fingers gripped his hair.

A familiar wave of panic spread through his entire body, and for about a second, he was scared.

"Are you okay?" He said, breaking away.

He was even more out of breath now and so was she.

"I'm fine..." MJ replied, before leaning in to kiss his lips quickly.

"If you ever want me to stop...just tell me..." Peter said.

MJ put her hands on his shoulders.

"I don't _want_ you to stop." MJ said firmly, shaking her head.

"Sure?" Peter asked.

MJ swallowed. She looked down at him, into his eyes, like she was completely serious.

"I'm _okay_ Peter." She whispered. "For once...stop asking questions. Just _screw_ me already."

Peter didn't know why this made him laugh a little, but he was _glad_ she said that. He could feel her weight on him now, and he pushed her hair back slowly with his hands.

_MJ, you're so beautiful_ he wanted to say, but instead, he just rubbed her back slowly and kissed her.

Then he gave her a reassuring look before he slid into her, and he felt the same euphoric sensation as he felt the first time.

Peter's arguably silly technique worked for a while till he fell backwards and MJ fell on top of him, but they got past it and just carried on, moving harmoniously together, like they'd done this once before.

They were both so out of breath, and as sweat began to glisten on MJ's body, Peter only thought about how it made her look _more_ beautiful.

MJ groaned louder now.

"Shh..." he kept saying, partly because she _liked_ it, but mostly because he didn't want one of his neighbors banging on the door.

After all, he was sure it was pretty late.

They kept going till Peter felt a surge of pleasure and he was pretty sure MJ did too, because he literally had to tell her to shut up, and Peter thought about how it was the best sex he'd ever had.

Well, it was only his _third_ time.

"That was..." MJ started, sighing heavily.

She climbed off of Peter and lay back down beside him.

"Fuck...you're good at that." She said.

"I know." Peter replied, as MJ playfully punched him in the ribs.

"Shut up." MJ laughed, before blowing some hair out of her face.

Peter turned over to look at her. He couldn't quite believe she was naked, lying down on his carpet. He wanted to pull her on top of him and do it all again.

MJ turned over to Peter, her breath finally slowing down. She put one hand behind his neck.

"Can I...stay?" She asked.

Peter pushed back her hair again slowly.

"Yeah." He said. "Of course."

"Thank you..." MJ replied, turning over to lie on her back. "And thank you...for _this_ , I guess."

"You don't have to thank me." Peter whispered, firmly. "I wanted it too...you know that, right? I wanted _you,_ MJ."

MJ just nodded slightly. She moved a little closer to him and locked her fingers in his.

And Peter wondered why she always felt obliged to thank him.  
  
  
  


Soon enough, they both got up and got themselves cleaned up.

MJ hadn't _planned_ on staying the night but she had ended up deciding to, having a shower in Peter's bathroom and brushing her teeth with _his_ toothbrush.

MJ had one of Peter's towels wrapped around her as she sat on his bed, watching him sift through his closet for a shirt for her to wear.

"Here." Peter said, throwing her a black shirt.

"Thanks." MJ said, before pulling the shirt over her head. It was relatively big on her.

She yawned, before climbing into his bed. Peter joined her after he got ready and then turned out the lights.

He kissed her forehead, before pulling her close to him. Then they both fell asleep.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Peter woke up, breathless. MJ was on the other side of the bed, her body turned away from him, fast asleep.

He'd had another one of his awful dreams about his parents. They were rare, but when they came, they still scared the shit out of him, and there was absolutely no way he could go back to sleep.

He slowly climbed out of the bed and walked out of his room, through the living room and towards the fridge. He opened the fridge door and grabbed a bottle of water out of it before sitting down on one end of the kitchen table. It was still dark and Peter guessed that it was about 3am in the morning.

He tried to calm himself down. He took deep breaths, and thought of the hug Aunt May had given him in the hospital, as he also drank his water.

Just as he put down the bottle, the door to his room opened and MJ walked out, her eyes tired.

"Is everything alright?" She asked, walking over and sitting down next to him.

They were on the same chairs they sat on that day that MJ came in with the Hawaiian pizza.

"I just have these dreams." Peter said, looking up at her. "They're nothing..."

MJ looked at him, before tucking her hair behind her ear.

"They're _not_ nothing." She said. "It's okay, Peter."

She touched his cheek with her fingers.

"Are they...about your mom and dad?..." MJ asked.

Peter sighed.

"Yeah..." he said quickly.

She placed her free hand on top of his on the table.

"They're okay, Peter...they're in a better place..."

"How do...you know?" Peter replied.

"Because I just do..." MJ said. "Sometimes, you just know these things. I never met them, and _you_ don't really remember them ever being here...but I know that they loved you. They _still_ love you....and they're okay. _It's okay."_

Peter looked up at her again. Her touch brought his nerves down. There was something so peaceful about the way her hair fell down her shoulders and the way she said 'it's okay'.

But he couldn't help thinking about what happened with Brain. He thought of Tyler getting in trouble for having drugs in his locker. He thought of MJ's face, that day on her bike.

_What happened to you, MJ?_ He thought.

_Who hurt you?_

MJ stood up before sitting down on Peter's lap, placing her hands behind his neck. He just hugged her, and when he felt her body on his, everything was suddenly okay.

"I'm so over it." She suddenly said, breaking away and sitting up. "Not telling...the truth."

Peter watched as tears filled her eyes.

"I just...I just don't want to hurt anyone. I don't want to hurt _you."_ She said.

Peter could not believe those words came out of MJ's mouth. He had finally gotten through to her. Maybe, his weeks of turmoil were finally coming to an end.

"No." Peter whispered. "You only hurt me when you hide it from me, MJ."

MJ shook her head and Peter wiped the tears away from her face with the back of his hands.

"Promise me, you'll keep this between us." She said. "You'll keep _everything_ between us."

Peter nodded, before swallowing.

"I promise." He said.

He wasn't sure he was ready for what he was about to hear. In fact, he wish he had not even woken up. He wanted the truth so badly but seeing her in this state broke his heart completely and he was scared about what he would feel.

He put a hand on her arm and rubbed it slowly.

"Okay..." she whispered, before putting her lips to his. Peter kissed her back, sliding his hand up her shirt, moving his fingers up and down her back, because he knew this relaxed her.

MJ broke away, before touching her forehead to his.

Her hands fell down to his shoulders, and he could _see_ how anxious she was feeling in her eyes as she stared downwards.

"It's okay..." Peter said softly, and he grabbed her hand.

As he squeezed her hand, he remembered what he had told her.

_You can tell me anything MJ._

_You know that right?_

_Because sometimes, I don't think you do..._

 


	14. The Party

The world seemed to stop turning at that moment. Nothing else mattered. _No one_ else mattered to Peter - just MJ.

She was still sat on his lap with her hand gripped tightly to his. Her facial expression had anxiety written all over it, and tears fell silently down her face.

Peter looked up at her again. He wanted to _say_ something, but he couldn't. For a moment, he was silent. He didn't know what to say then that would help her say what _she_ wanted to say.

Her body felt light, and Peter was reminded of all the times he would sit on Uncle Ben's lap, and he would tell him all sorts of stories.

As a child, he would just sit there and listen, even though he didn't always understand what was going on.

Peter felt a huge responsibility for MJ in that moment. He felt like he needed to take care of her. He felt like he needed to just _listen_ and accept everything she was about to say.

He knew that whatever happened, it was going to be _really_ hard for her to tell him.

MJ sighed heavily as more tears escaped her eyes. Her grip on Peter's hand seemed to tighten.

"It's okay..." Peter whispered again, rubbing her shoulder.

"I don't want you to...hate me..." MJ replied, forcing her words out as she sobbed.

"No..." Peter said, softly. "MJ, I'll never hate you. I won't judge you for whatever happened. You just have to talk to me...that's it..."

MJ sighed again, wiping tears from her face.

"This is so hard..." she whispered.

"I know..." Peter replied, his voice slightly shaky now.

There was a silence again and Peter was just looking at her... _waiting_ for her to say something. After a while, MJ had stopped crying and just stared at the floor.

"That night..." MJ said, her voice low and croaky. "At Liz's party..."

Peter could feel his heart beating out of his chest. It was like his mind was calculating millions of thoughts all at once, but he could only concentrate on MJ's face and hold her hand, and stroke her arm. This was what he'd been anticipating for the past several weeks.

"After Andrew went in with Liz..." Peter said quietly.

He was trying to help her process her thoughts but didn't want to say anything too leading.

"You were...banging on the shed door..." MJ said. "And then I saw you."  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


"Go away, MJ." Peter said.

"Okay, fine..." MJ replied, mockingly. "Just quit acting like a psycho. Everyone's staring at you."

Peter glanced up at the glass doors and he could see some people laughing at him. Some he recognized as jocks, some he knew from debate club. Had they all seen what went down with Andrew?

He flushed red.

"Are you sad because you didn't get laid?" MJ said, her brown eyes glistening.

"Shut up..." Peter muttered pushing past her.

As soon as MJ had made another one of her insulting and soul-provoking comments, she wished she hadn't said anything at all. Her heart genuinely sank as she watched Peter disappear through those glass doors.

_Why did I say that?_ MJ thought, staring after him.

The only person she had come to this party to see was Andrew, and now he was probably in there, getting it on with Liz.

The people standing around who watched her make fun of Peter dispersed into different directions, and she was left standing there alone.

All of a sudden, she felt extremely self-conscious. She wished her Dad had never told her that she looked good in that stupid floral dress and she wished she hadn't rushed out of the house, and she wished she had spent more time on her makeup. She wished she looked like every other girl at that party, with their toned bodies and sleek, glossy hair.

She wanted someone to walk past and just tell her that she looked nice. That would have been enough for the night. But no one did. And to make matters worse, she had spent her entire evening looking for Andrew, and now, it didn't even seem like he was interested.

For a second, MJ thought about running after Peter, and stopping him, and apologizing to him for embarrassing him in front of all those people.

She thought about ditching the party and asking Peter to take her home, so she could complain to her Dad about how shitty high school parties were and he could say something comforting that would make her sleep easy.

Maybe she was a little hard on Peter. Maybe she was so annoyed with the fact that the seniors were paying so much attention to _him_ and not her. Maybe she took her anger out on him, because she longed for someone to _want_ to spend time with her like Liz did with Peter.

_Maybe I'm just jealous,_ MJ thought.

She wanted to turn to go, but then she heard the lock on the shed door click, and watched as the door opened.

Andrew leaned out of the doorway, and MJ's heart skipped a beat. She thought he was _so_ hot. She liked how his hair was half wet from being in the pool, and how it was brown at the roots and blonde at the tips, and how his swim shorts kind of sagged at the side.

"Are you lost?..." Andrew asked MJ, a puzzled look on his face.

MJ was lost for words for a few seconds. She just stared at his six pack, and his cheekbones, and his eyes.

Then she remembered where she was and realized that if she didn't start talking, she may never get to fuck him tonight.

"Kinda..." MJ said, pushing her hair away from her face. "I don't think you know my name-"

"MJ..." Andrew said, interrupting her. "Your name is MJ and you're a Junior. You're on the debate team, you're really good at Biology, and you're also kinda rich. I know who you are."

MJ felt like she was having an outer-body experience. How did _he_ know who she was, she thought.

"You're pretty correct there..." she said, smiling. "I also know that your name is Andrew...and that you're about to have sex with Liz...so I guess there's no point in me standing here, really..."

MJ didn't know how those words managed to come out of her mouth, but they did.

Andrew just laughed, leaning against the doorway.

"Now that's funny..." he said, smiling. "But you should know that there's absolutely _no way_ that Liz is letting me get in her pants tonight. She's wasted...and tired...and I'd rather fuck someone that was like...you know...awake."

MJ thought about how hypocritical that sounded because of what Peter had said earlier, but was completely mesmerized by the way Andrew spoke, and the way he smiled and looked occasionally on the floor and then back up at her.

"You might as well come in..." Andrew said, opening the door wide. "It's kinda cold outside anyway."

MJ hesitated for a second, but then she walked in. She was immediately relieved by the warmth of the shed and wondered why she didn't wear a swimsuit so that she could have gotten into the heated pool.

She saw Liz lying on the bed and holding a hand to her head. MJ was pretty sure that she was now either completely drunk out of her mind or fast asleep. Either way, she was glad that Andrew decided that _she_ was a better use of his time.

"Are you hungry?" Andrew asked MJ. "There's some snacks in that mini-fridge over there..."

"Not really..." MJ said, glancing over at the pool table. "Do you know how to play pool?"

"Do I _know_?" Andrew said, laughing. "I play with my Dad all the time. We've got a table in our house and it's really fun. I'll teach you."

MJ couldn't believe this was happening. She couldn't believe that one of the most popular boys at Midtown was about to teach _her_ how to play a game.

She watched as Andrew picked one of the cue sticks lying on the table and proceeded to take a shot, aligning the stick perfectly with the ball and making a successful hit into one of the four corners.

"That's how you do it..." Andrew said handing MJ another one of the sticks. "Wanna try?"

MJ nodded, and after a few minutes, she was immersed into a game of pool with Andrew. He always stopped to teach her more tricks, and she liked how close he would have to get to her to help her make the shots. She liked how she had now retained the smell of his cologne, and how he got to move her body into place with his hands and lean over her, touching her arm.

She liked how they started a conversation about school, and how Andrew asked her if she had a crush on any of the seniors, and how she got to play hard to get by not mentioning his name. He would often crack jokes and MJ would laugh, and then stare into his eyes some more.

She didn't care that Andrew beat her at pool in the end. She was just _glad_ that she was there with him, and had almost completed her goal for tonight.

She wanted to finally lose her virginity.

"Should we have some 'Vodka and Orange'?" Andrew said, picking up a bottle of booze that resided in a bucket of ice.

"Sure..." MJ said, letting Andrew pour them both a drink.

She felt a tingling feeling surge through her as she took the first sip. Whatever was in there was _strong_ and she kinda liked it.

"This is really good..." MJ said, taking another sip.

"It's my favourite drink..." Andrew smiled, before attempting to down his entire cup.

MJ just watched, impressed. There was something sexy about the way he shook his head afterwards and ran his hands through his hair.

"Wow..." MJ laughed, looking at him. "That was really something..."

" _You_ try..." Andrew said, stumbling backwards for a bit. He was definitely light headed now, MJ thought.

"What, drink the whole thing?" MJ asked.

"Drink the bottle..." Andrew said, removing her cup from her hand and handing the bottle to her. "You'll feel _so_ much better after. Trust me."

MJ hesitated for a second. She'd never actually got _wasted_ at a party before, but lo and behold, Andrew was standing in front of her, and her chances of getting screwed would probably be increased if they were both slightly drunk.

MJ looked at Andrew, then the bottle, and then back at him. She shrugged and rolled her eyes before taking a huge swig from the bottle. The liquid was like acid pouring down her throat and she felt it sting, but again, she kind of liked it.

Once she had consumed most of what was inside bottle, she put it down, and almost swore that she could see stars, but she could also see Andrew smiling at her, and she felt him pat her on the back.

"I think that was more impressive than what I did..." he said, putting his arm around her.

MJ took that opportunity to look at him again and stare into his eyes some more. Her face was now so close to his and she'd never felt so _alive._

"I think you're stunning, MJ." Andrew said, his words kind of slurred from all the alcohol.

"I'll take that compliment..." MJ replied. "So, are you gonna kiss me or-"

Andrew had already leaned in to kiss her. MJ got butterflies in her stomach. She kissed him back, moving her hands up to his face, and she felt his hands slide down to her waist.

_Yes,_ MJ thought. This was everything she had ever wanted. To kiss the boy she'd had a crush on since Freshman year. To have him touching her.

As they continued kissing, MJ heard a groan coming from the other side of the room and realized that is was Liz waking up.

Andrew broke away from the kiss for a second, and MJ bit her lip.

"Rise and shine..." Andrew called out to Liz.

MJ laughed. Liz didn't seem so high and mighty now that she was half-passed out on the bed.

"What are...you guys _doing_?" Liz said, slowly, rolling over on her side and narrowing her eyes at them both.

"Making out...evidently..." Andrew said, pulling MJ closer to him. MJ giggled, and she didn't know if it was because she genuinely found what Andrew said funny, or if all the alcohol was going to her head already.

"No...you're not..." Liz said, sitting up and putting a hand on her head. "If you guys wanna fuck, then go get a room. Get out of here."

MJ's heart skipped a beat again. What if Andrew hadn't thought about going that far with her yet? What if he didn't _want_ to have sex with her?

"I guess we'll go then..." Andrew said, putting his arm around MJ's waist and steering her towards the door. "Should I turn the lights off?"

"Yes!" Liz shouted. "Ugh...can you just leave already?"

"We're going...geez Liz..." Andrew said, opening the door to let him and MJ out and shutting it behind him.

MJ felt the chill from being outside again. The butterflies in her stomach seemed to be more apparent now, and she realized that she might actually be getting _laid_ tonight.

"Should we go find a room in the house?" Andrew asked, taking MJ's hand. "It's huge and there's a lot of spares."

"Sure." MJ said, trying to sound as nonchalant as she could. There was no way that she was going to blow her chances tonight by acting like a rookie.

The journey past the pool area, into the house and up the stairs was a little bit of a blur to MJ. Every step seemed to feel heavy, and as Andrew was talking to her, she could only hear snippets of his voice.

MJ could gauge that she was now in one of Liz's guest bedrooms and she heard the sound of Andrew shutting the door behind them.

Her vision cleared up and she saw his face more clearly now.

_He's gorgeous,_ MJ thought.

She seemed to fall into kissing him this time. The alcohol had made her body more relaxed and she kissed Andrew more intensely than before, wrapping her arms around his neck and and letting him pull her up so her legs were wrapped around his waist.

MJ's mind was racing. It was like she couldn't control herself, and it felt like she almost couldn't feel every slight movement she made.

Andrew carried on kissing her, and MJ felt her back against the wall. She felt Andrew's hand slide down her back, down to her thighs and then up her dress, and before she knew it, he was fingering her, and MJ thought how she'd never experienced that kind of _pleasure_ in her life before.

She broke away from the kiss for a second, closing her eyes and letting his hand explore her. It was like electrical pulses running through her entire body. She gasped softly and wrapped her legs tighter around Andrew's waist.

When he was finished, he let her down to the ground before pressing his lips to hers again. Then after a few seconds, he broke away.

MJ was panting now and her emotions were now mixed with the surge of pleasure she had just felt and a confusion as to why Andrew had stopped.

She felt like she wanted to fall forwards for a second, and the room span around her.

"Are you okay?" Andrew asked her, and she nodded. She didn't care if she wasn't feeling a hundred percent herself. All she wanted in that moment was him.

"We can't do this yet..." Andrew continued. "I'm gonna have to go find a condom..."

_Are you kidding me?_ MJ thought.

"Okay..." she replied, still panting slightly.

Andrew took her hands gently and led her to sit down on the bed.

"I'll be a few seconds...okay?" Andrew said, before kissing her quickly.

Andrew leaving the room was a bit of a blur to MJ as well. She felt a few seconds pass, then a minute, then another minute.

And soon she wasn't sure if he was going to come back at all.

She had now gotten a piercing headache and felt shivery all over. She lay back on the bed, trying to stay awake just in case Andrew came back in.

But she couldn't...and her eyes closed.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


"MJ..."

Her eyes squinted open and she saw that she was still lying on the bed and that there was no sign of Andrew.

Someone else was leaning over her. She couldn't quite make out his face but she thought she'd seen him sitting at the senior table before, and she figured that he was on the football team.

She sat up - all too quickly - and her vision focused on Brian. He was sitting at the edge of his bed on his phone and smiling at her.

"Where's Andrew?" MJ said, feeling really warm all of a sudden.

"He passed out like twenty minutes ago apparently..." Brian said. "I don't think he's gonna be waking up anytime soon."

MJ was pissed off. She was pissed that Andrew had just left her there. She was pissed that she had envisioned this perfect night with him, and now she was sitting here with this God-awful headache and she hadn't even gotten laid at all.

"Great..." MJ sighed standing up and smoothening out her dress. "What are _you_ doing here anyway?"

"Most of my friends are completely wasted and I was getting pretty bored..." Brian said, leaning on his elbow. "Thought I'd crash here with you..."

MJ looked at him. She guessed she thought his muscles were attractive, and his tight white shirt and jeans seemed to emphasise them a bit more.

But now she just wanted to get the fuck out of there.

"You _wish..."_ MJ said angrily, before pressing her hand against the door handle. As she opened it, the faint party music grew even louder and she was almost deafened by all the noise.

But someone else was standing in the doorway when she opened it. MJ didn't know who he was.

He had hazel-green eyes and long hair that covered the side of his face a little bit. He was wearing a grey Calvin Klein T-shirt with swim shorts and his shoes looked pretty expensive, MJ thought.

He looked at MJ and smiled at her, laughing a little to himself.

"You look _wasted_..." the boy said, eyeing her up and down. "Andrew shouldn't have bailed on you like that. Did you scare him away or something?"

"I don't know who you are or what your problem is..." MJ said, between gritted teeth. "But I know that you need to move out of my way so I can leave."

"Nice to meet you too..." the boy said sarcastically, rolling his eyes. He was still blocking her. "You Midtown girls get so worked up when you're drunk..."

"Who the _fuck_ are you?" MJ said again, narrowing her eyes at him.

"I'm Oscar..." the boy said, reaching out to shake her hand. MJ didn't shake it. "I'm new around here...I'm also on the football team so Brian over there's my guy..."

MJ turned round to look at Brian and he nodded at Oscar.

"Do you want a welcoming card or something?" MJ replied. "I've said it once before. Move out of my fucking way."

"First of all, that's really rude..." Oscar said, still not budging. "Second of all...I only _came_ to find you because someone told me earlier that your Dad was like an admission officer or something...for Stanford University?"

MJ didn't know why this mattered and why this guy was pestering her now of all times.

"So?" MJ said. "And before you ask...no I will _not_ ask him to write a college reference for you."

Oscar just smiled at her and MJ didn't know what to make of it. It was one of those smiles that made her slightly scared.

"Not even like...a paragraph of a letter?" Oscar asked, squinting. "I could really use the early admission to M.I.T..."

" _No."_ MJ said, matter-of-factly. "I'm sure M.I.T is better off without your dumb ass..."

She was fed up now. She tried to push past Oscar but he grabbed her arm. MJ tried to struggle from his grip but he was too strong.

"What the fuck is your problem?" she shouted. "Let go of me!"

"Hey..." Brian called to Oscar from behind MJ. "Just let her go man, there's no point."

Oscar ignored Brian, looking at MJ straight in the eyes and still grabbing onto her arm. The worst part was that he still had that stupid smile on his face, MJ thought.

"What's MJ short for?..." Oscar said, quietly.

MJ winced as she felt his grip on her tighten.

"What...?"

"What's your actual _name?"_ Oscar asked again. "Did you not hear me the first time? Are you retarded or something?"

"Michelle..." MJ said, between gritted teeth.

"That's sweet..." Oscar said, giving her a look of fake sympathy. "You shortened your name. Can I let you on a little secret...Michelle? It probably wasn't a good idea to talk to me like that. See...I've got a really low tolerance for bullshit, and I think you may have crossed the line there..."

"Dude..." Brian said, but Oscar was still holding on to MJ.

If she didn't feel intoxicated before, she could definitely feel it now. Her throat felt like is was burning and there was sweat starting to build up on her forehead.

"Brian..." MJ muttered, turning to look back at him. She was hoping he would help her but he just stood up and backed up against the wall.

"He's not gonna help you..." Oscar said, bringing his face close to hers. "I mean...he could probably try but he wouldn't _dare_ touch me. Can you imagine beating up the new kid? Especially when his parents are investing into the school..."

MJ looked up at him, tears starting to fall from her eyes. The last thing she wanted to do was cry, but he was holding her so tight and she was starting to realize that he had full control over her.

"I'm _sorry..."_ MJ said, her voice shaking. "I've apologized...are you happy now? Let me go...you're hurting me..."

Oscar let go of her arm, and MJ sighed in relief, rubbing the mark that had now been left near her wrist.

" _Move..._ " she said to him, menacingly.

Without hesitating she pushed past him and out the door into a hallway that seemed to go on forever. It was completely deserted, she thought. The sound of the party music was now immense and she could feel her ears ringing. She couldn't really remember her way out, but she knew that she had to get downstairs and _fast_ because it felt like the walls were closing in on her.

She stumbled down the hallway, tears still falling hot and fast down her face. She wished she had never drunk that bottle of Vodka with Andrew. She wished he had never let her into that stupid shed...and she wished she had followed Peter out when he left.

_Peter._

That's when MJ saw him for the second time that night. He was walking down the corridor, his steps very uneven. He was tracing his fingers against the walls and seemed to be blinking profusely.

With all the strength she thought she could muster, she walked up to Peter and tried to touch his shoulder.

He flinched.

"Peter..." MJ said, realizing that she was now out of breath for some reason. She also realized that she now looked so upset in front of him and it was a direct contrast to how mean she had been towards him earlier.

"What do you _want,_ MJ?" Peter said, his voice sounding as shaky as MJ felt.

He didn't sound like himself at all. In fact, MJ wondered if he was high, and also wondered where on earth he could possibly have gotten drugs from if he was.

"Take me downstairs..." MJ sobbed, touching Peter's arm as he flinched again. "I...I don't know where I'm going and I need to get out of here."

"Why would I help _you,_ MJ?" Peter said, raising his voice. "You act like a _bitch_ all the time. You're irritating...and stuck up...and everything that comes out of your mouth is _bullshit_. You don't care about anyone else but yourself..."

"Peter..." MJ said again. She couldn't believe he was saying all this to her. It was like a stab of pain in her chest.

"No, MJ!" Peter shouted. "I'm sick and _tired_ of you always treating me like shit. Don't even say anything, because I don't wanna hear it..."

"I..." MJ stammered. "There's...some guy in that room over there...and he grabbed my arm, and he wouldn't let go of me, and Brian wouldn't help me..."

"I don't _care_..." Peter said, his voice still shaking. "He can do whatever he likes to you...you're a horrible person...and you _deserve_ it..."

MJ felt sick.

"Peter, you're drunk..." MJ kept muttering, but he just threw his head back, rolling his eyes.

She suddenly felt someone's arm around her shoulder and she flinched before turning around to see Oscar's smug face and hazel-green eyes and long brown hair.

MJ shrugged Oscar off and reached forward to grab Peter's arm but he grabbed her shoulders and pushed her back into Oscar forcefully.

"Fuck. Off." Peter muttered, his words slurred before staggering backwards, drunkenly.

"See...?" Oscar said, in a tone that was nothing less than mocking. "I knew I wasn't the only one who thinks you should change your attitude. It's gonna get you in trouble some day."

"Can you just leave me alone?..." MJ said, her voice reduced down to a whisper now.

She looked up at Peter but he didn't say anything. He just leant against the wall with his head in his hands.

"Come on MJ..." Oscar said, putting a hand around her waist and pulling her towards him. "I heard you've been waiting for someone to screw you all evening...I might be able to help you out..."

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Brian. He was just standing there too.

She could feel her body boiling with anger. They both didn't care. They both didn't want to do anything to help her. She knew she was in this alone.

"Just let go of me..." MJ said, exasperated. She tried to release herself from his grip, but again, she couldn't.

_You deserve it._

Oscar started to kiss her. MJ tried to push him away but he was still holding on to her waist and pulling her inwards.

She managed to break away for a second, completely enraged.

Then MJ did what she would regret doing for the next six weeks. She slapped Oscar across the face, her cold hands colliding with his cheek.

He let go of her for a second, breathing heavily. The side of his face was now semi-red, and he turned back to look at her with a piercing look.

Everything that happened after that happened very quickly. MJ felt him grab both her arms now, and before she knew it, he was dragging her out of the hallway, and back into the room that she'd previously been in with Andrew. She was screaming, but the sound of the music on the floor below drowned her out.

She hoped for a split second, that someone would come after her. That someone would hit Oscar and take her away from him. But no one did.

No one cared.  
  


**(The following content might be an emotional trigger for some.)**   
  
  
  
  
  
  


Peter thought he was going to have a panic attack. As MJ forced every word out and told him what had happened up until this point, he felt his heart beating faster and faster.

He couldn't _believe_ that he had said those things to her. He didn't _want_ to believe it.

They were both sat on the floor, leaning against the fridge now, partly because he had felt so weak hearing the story, and because the coolness of the fridge soothed his back, which was now aching for some reason.

He hadn't let go of MJ's hand.

"And then..." MJ continued, sobbing. "He dragged me all the way back into that room...and he was holding me so tight that I couldn't let go..."

Peter's head was hurting. He knew what was coming next and he didn't think he was prepared to hear it. He just kept holding on to MJ's hand.

And he felt hot tears streaming down his face.

"MJ..." he said, shaking his head. His voice was barely a whisper.

"Then he forced me down on the bed..." MJ continued, her breath quickening as she sobbed. "And he got on top of me...I couldn't move...he pinned down my arms and I started to beg him to stop but he didn't..."

There were _so_ many things that Peter couldn't believe she was telling him. But that's not why he had a strong pain in his heart. That's not why he felt the same pain he felt that day Uncle Ben died, or the day he realized that his parents were gone forever.

"I was screaming...but it was like no one could hear me..." MJ continued. "He kept telling me to be quiet...and then he put his hand over my mouth and pulled down my underwear...and I _still_ couldn't move..."

Peter looked down at his hands. He was shaking.

"And I didn't realize what was happening...until it started to _hurt_...I didn't think sex could _hurt_ like that...I closed my eyes and tried to forget the pain but it didn't work...and he wouldn't stop...he just kept going...and going. He kept telling me over and again...that I was a bitch, that I was a _slut,_ that I _asked_ for it. All I could feel was him inside of me, and his weight on my body, and his grip on my arm. I was in _so_ much pain...but then my whole body felt like it was numb...I just froze...it was like I couldn't feel anything..."

MJ took a quick intake of air.

"Then I passed out...and the crazy thing was...when I woke up...all I could think about was you..."

Peter felt her look up at him. He couldn't even look back at her. He was staring aimlessly in front of him and he felt like his head was about to explode.

"Because..." MJ continued. "I _knew_ you'd never say those things to me even if you were drunk...because you actually _care._ You don't just say stuff like that to people. So...I had to get you out of there. It was my only way of explaining to everyone else...why I left early. You were my escape...I thought you'd remember what happened...but you didn't. After that night, you were _still_ my escape. You were the only person I could talk to...that didn't make me feel like I'd changed...that didn't make me feel like I was no longer myself..."

Her voice trailed off.

Peter looked back at her.

" _Why,_ MJ?" he said, his voice weak. "Why didn't you just...tell me?"

MJ shook her head.

"It's not just about me, Peter." MJ said. "It's Oscar...his future... _you._ I couldn't hurt you...I didn't want you to think you were a monster...or that you hurt me, because you didn't. And everyone in school? I didn't want to be the victim...I convinced myself that I _wanted_ it. That it happened because I _wanted_ it to happen. I didn't want anyone's sympathy...I just wanted to be _me_ and be _cool._ For once. For once, people were paying attention to me....it felt _great_ to be popular for a moment. But the more time I spent with you, the more I realized I didn't want it. I didn't want any of that at all and it was _wrong."_

MJ wrapped her arms around him and he felt tears now rapidly running down his cheeks. He felt broken.

More broken than he'd ever felt in his life.

"I'm so sorry." Peter kept on saying, as MJ stroked his hair. "I'm sorry...I'm sorry."

He was shaking, and he was pretty sure MJ could feel him shaking in her arms. The worst part of it all? He could have done something about it. And he didn't. _He_ was the cause of her pain. All her anxiety. He was the reason those rumors started and he was the reason why she hated school.

He should never had gotten her invited in the first place.

"Peter, it's okay." MJ whispered.

Peter broke away now, shaking his head, looking back at her helplessly.

"It's my fault." He said.

"No it's not, Peter." MJ said firmly, reaching out to touch him again.

"Yes it is." Peter said, putting his back to the fridge again.

He felt like he was choking on his own words. All he wanted to do was go back to that night. When he saw her, standing in front of the shed. All he wanted to do was grab her and get her the hell out of there.

"I should've..." Peter gulped, his voice trailing off.

"Peter, please." MJ said, taking his hand.

She curled up next to him and put her head on his shoulder. She kissed his tear-stained cheek.

He knew she wanted him to just move on. She wanted to forget that night had ever happened.

But Peter didn't want to forget.

He didn't know if he could _ever_ forgive Oscar.

He didn't know if he could ever forgive himself.

 


	15. Disappear

"Damn, I really _hate_ history." Ned sighed, putting a pen in his mouth. "I hate that they make us take classes other than science and math in Junior year...I did _not_ sign up for this."

It was 4am, and Peter had decided to pull an all nighter at Ned's house to study for finals.

He had been so consumed by his own thoughts this past weekend, that he just couldn't find the motivation to study. He wasn't exactly excited to go into school on Monday and see the faces of all the people he now _hated._

Brian. _Oscar._

Peter hadn't told Ned anything that MJ had told him. He promised her that he would keep everything a secret, but it was proving really _hard._

That night, MJ had fallen asleep on Peter.

Peter didn't sleep at all. He had lay awake, thinking about how badly he wanted to make everyone that hurt her pay. And she had left in the morning, and he hadn't seen her since.

He had picked May up from the hospital, taken her home, and now he was sat on Ned's dinner table in the early hours of the morning, trying to cram notes for his English test.

"Peter?" Ned asked, tapping Peter's hand. "What did you get for question five on the homework?"

Peter was highlighting ' _Pride and Prejudice'_ furiously. He wasn't paying attention to Ned...or what he was highlighting.

"Mmm?" Peter mumbled, finally looking up.

Peter's hair was messy. He had shown up to Ned's house wearing his pajamas and had packed his bag ready for school in the morning.

"Oh...that one...I just made up something up about capitalism."

"Are you thinking about May, Peter?" Ned asked.

He wasn't. He was thinking about MJ. All he could think about was MJ.

"She's okay, Peter. You even said yourself that she got back last night, and she was her usual self, just a bit rusty..." Ned said to Peter, closing his textbook.

Peter just nodded slightly. He didn't feel like saying much.

"MJ told me she stayed at your apartment on Friday." Ned continued, getting up to walk across to the fridge. "I tried calling both of you guys but you weren't picking up...I was so confused about the trig homework..."

His voice seemed to trail off in Peter's head.

Peter's brain felt fuzzy.

"Yeah, I'm sorry Ned." Peter muttered, looking back down at his book again.

Ned opened the fridge, grabbing a water and a cookie. Peter didn't know how he could eat so early in the morning.

"You want a cookie?" Ned said, peering into the fridge.

"No thanks, Ned. I'm good." Peter replied, turning a page in his book.

Ned closed the fridge and sat back down on the dinner table, next to Peter.

Ned's parents were _never_ home, Peter thought.

"What's up, Pete? You seem a little down." Ned said, before taking a bite into his cookie.

Peter just kept on highlighting, resting his head in one of his hands.

"I'm _good_ , Ned." Peter said again, before clearing his throat.

"So..." Ned mumbled. "Are you and MJ a _thing?_ Like boyfriend and girlfriend?"

Peter hesitated a bit, then he nodded slightly.

"Wow - I would have _never_ saw that one coming." Ned laughed. "This whole 'MJ at the party thing' is kind of over, right? I mean, we hit a dead end-"

"Yeah, it is." Peter sighed, really wanting Ned to shut up.

"So, you guys had sex _again?_ When she was over at your place?"

"Ned!" Peter nearly shouted, looking up again.   
"Please."

"Ok, I'm sorry." Ned said, leaning back on his chair, his mouth full of cookie. "I'm just...happy for you, I guess. You're on a roll."

Peter didn't _want_ to be mean to Ned. He just didn't want to talk much. He didn't really want to talk to anyone.

He thought about that night with MJ and how amazing he felt after they had sex, and how _happy_ he was, and how quickly he was _unhappy_ after MJ told him everything.

Peter ran a hand through his hair, before yawning.

"Well..." Ned stammered, before taking a sip of his water. "I think I'm gonna get some sleep before school. You should too, Peter. The couch is ready and available."

Ned stood up and patted Peter on the shoulder, before making his way down the hall to his room.

Peter could barely keep his eyes open, but he certainly wasn't interested in failing any of his finals. All he wanted to do was talk to MJ, but he knew she was probably busy studying too.

And besides, _she_ didn't want to talk about what Peter wanted to talk about, he thought.

He powered on through the book, scribbling down notes and circling words. But soon, his eyes became tired and he fell asleep, with his head on his arm, and his pen in his hand.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


This was the first time Peter felt extremely anxious walking into school, in a long time.

The smell of the hallway and the sounds of the people around him made him feel slightly sick. He'd already lost Ned, who had gone to go catch up with some other Juniors. Peter wasn't interested in mingling.

He opened his locker, shoving his bag inside it and grabbing some pens and a pencil for his test.

"Hi, Peter."

Peter turned around to see Liz standing behind him. She had two tickets in her hands.

"As part of the committee, you get free tickets to Winter Formal." Liz smiled.

Her hair was in a bun and she was wearing a very short, red sweater dress.

Peter forced a smile.

"Thanks, Liz." He swallowed, taking the tickets from her.

"You got a date, Peter?" Liz asked.

"Um...." Peter stammered. "I _think_ I do-"

"Let me guess...MJ?" Liz laughed, punching Peter playfully.

Peter just shrugged, before shoving the tickets in his pocket.

Then he got a text.

_'In room 37 by myself. Trying to avoid the crowds. :p'_

It was MJ.

"I'll see you later, Liz." Peter said, looking down at his phone. "Thanks for the tickets."

He walked past Liz, with his head down, along  the hallway, and then made a left at the end of the corridor to the English classrooms.

_34, 35, 36...._ Peter thought.

When he got to number 37, Peter pushed the door open to the tiny classroom. MJ had a whiteboard pen in her hand and was scribbling Biology notes on the board.

"Hey, Parker." She said.

She looked the best she'd ever looked at school, Peter thought. She had some blue mom jeans on, black boots and a cute white sweater on.

And she sounded so... _normal,_ Peter thought.

"Hey." Peter said, his voice tired, as he shut the door.

MJ's hair was plaited into two pigtails. Peter wanted to tell her that he loved her sweater, and that her boots were cool and that her pigtails were cute, but he was truly exhausted.

He walked up to MJ slowly, before standing next to her and watching her. He hadn't seen her in a few days and he was starting to realize just how much he'd missed her.

MJ stayed focused on her diagrams, biting her lip as she concentrated.

"Did you get _any_ sleep last night?" MJ laughed, turning round to Peter, and putting a lid on her marker.

"Not really." Peter sighed, rubbing his eyes.

MJ put the pen down on the table in front of her then gave Peter a hug. Peter wrapped his arms around her, smelling that familiar lavender in her hair.

Then he put his hands on her cheeks and kissed her. MJ kissed him back, her arms around Peter's neck.

Peter kissed her and kissed her - he didn't want to let go because he just wanted to be close to her. It healed the hurt he was feeling inside...just for a little bit.

Then MJ broke away slowly, before taking Peter's hand.

"Are you _okay?"_ She asked, looking directly at him now.

Peter swallowed.

"I...guess." He sighed. "I just....I just _hate_ this place."

"You suddenly hate it now because of what happened to me?" MJ said, letting go of Peter's hand.

"No." Peter said, leaning on the edge of the teacher's desk. "I've always hated it."

"I get it." MJ sighed. "It's nice when you're sitting on the _'seniors table'_ at lunch, or if you're top of the class, or if your Mom's on the PTA. Other than that.....it sucks."

Peter looked at her and thought about how badly he wanted to kiss her again.

But he didn't.

"I just feel like....we haven't really _talked_ about everything you said." Peter finally said, forcing his words out.

MJ pursed her lips. She grabbed the board pen again and began writing.

"Well...I don't want to talk about it." MJ said bluntly, leaning forward on her toes slightly to reach the top of the board.

Peter sighed. Then he decided to just say what he wanted to say.

"Are you sure you don't want me to talk to Osca-"

"No!" MJ shouted now, turning around to him. She brought her voice down to an angry whisper. "Peter, it took me _weeks_ to tell you that. And it's because I _trust_ you and I felt like I could tell you. That's all. I don't want to report this to anyone. I don't want my Dad knowing, anyone else at school knowing, and I _definitely_ don't want you to talk to Oscar."

She turned back round to the board. Her writing was short and forceful. Peter felt his whole body tensing up.

"MJ...how can you just pretend this is normal?" Peter whispered.

"It's _not_ that big of a deal, oh my God, Peter-"

"It is!" Peter shouted, now. "MJ, you were _assaulted._ And you're being _harassed_ online. People like Flash, and Brian? They have no right to do stuff like that. You can't just _pretend_ it didn't fucking happen because it did-"

"Shhh!" MJ hissed. "Oh my God, I can't believe you right now. Shut up! Just, stop talking."

Peter shook his head in disbelief.

"I don't understand." He muttered. "I just don't get you-"

MJ stopped what she was doing now, before putting down the marker and grabbing her bag.

"You don't _get_ me?" MJ said, shrugging her bag over her shoulder.

Peter opened his mouth to say something, but no words came out.

"If you tell _anyone_ about what I said, mark my words Peter, I am _never_ speaking to you again." MJ said, before pushing past him.

She walked out, slamming the door behind her.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Peter was a mixture of hurt, angry and confused. He knew he had bombed his English Lit exam. He wrote half a page of an essay and just sat there, staring at the wall, tapping his desk with his pen, biting his nails.

He looked back at MJ. She was on the other side of the hall and she was taking her Biology paper. He watched her bite her lip in concentration and vigorously scribbling things down with her right hand. He watched her put her pen in her mouth, think, push her hair behind her ear, think some more, then write down a careful answer.

He loved her _so_ much.

He was falling in love with every little bit of her. He was noticing little things in her mannerisms that he hadn't previously noticed.

He loved the way she put her hand down her sweater and fiddled with her bra strap whilst she was writing. He loved the way she muttered things to herself and sighed as she grabbed her eraser. He loved how she was always leaning forward slightly, how delicately she handled her calculator and how she looked up at the ceiling when she was trying to remember something. He loved how she stuck her tongue out ever so slightly when she was writing.

_I'm sorry, MJ_ he thought, as he stared at her now. _I'm sorry that you'll hate me after today but I have to do what's right. I'm not going to let him get away with it. I'm not going to let any of them bully you again._

"Ok, if you're taking English Lit, please put down your pens." Mr Davies said, from the front of the hall.

Peter was glad Mr Davies was in charge of testing because he was generally a nice, chilled dude. He hadn't even told Peter once to stop looking to the other side of the room, and focus on his own paper.

Mr Davies walked down the test hall, collecting the papers. Peter felt numb. He didn't think he'd ever done so badly in his life. 

"Caught you looking to the left a lot." Mr Davies whispered, taking Peter's paper.

"Um...sorry." Peter started "I-"

"It's fine, Peter don't worry. MJ's a pretty girl, isn't she?"

Peter really couldn't believe Mr Davies had just said that. He was sure that MJ would be thrilled. She'd always joked about how _hot_ he was.

Peter just smiled quickly. Then when Mr Davies had walked past, he looked back at MJ.

The Biology test was obviously still going on. She didn't even look up at him. She was so focused on what she was doing, and there was a tense rigidity to her movements. There was a concern in her eyes. Peter _knew_ she would do amazing. He wasn't worried about her test, he was worried about _her._

So that's why when he was let out of the hall, he ran up to find Ned who was standing outside the main double doors.

"How'd it go?" Ned asked Peter, shrugging his bag over his shoulder. "Man, we got such a bad essay title-"

"The test was shit." Peter muttered, looking everywhere but at Ned. "It couldn't have gone worse."

All he wanted to do was find Oscar.

"Did you see MJ?" Ned asked, as they made their way down the steps.

Peter shook his head. He knew he was lying, he just didn't want to get into a conversation with Ned about MJ.

"Did you see Oscar?" Peter asked, pushing his hair back.

"He's not in school..." Ned sighed. "He doesn't have any finals today."

Peter nodded, trying not to look too annoyed.

"What's up with you?" Ned asked, taking out his car keys.

Peter could hardly hear him over the sound of the busy road beside them, and the laughter and shrieks of students who were relieved to have finished yet another final. Part of him was also choosing not to listen to Ned.

"Nothing." Peter said, trailing behind Ned as Ned tried to find his car. "I...I need you to take me to Oscar's house."

"What, why?" Ned asked.

Peter followed Ned round the corner till they had reached Ned's car.

"It's about Winter Formal." Peter lied, opening up the car door and shoving his bag inside. "Just drop me at his house, then you can leave. I'll take the subway home..."

Ned looked confused, like he was about to say something, but then decided not to bother.

When they got into the car, Peter connected his phone to the aux cord and immediately started playing some Drake.

He just didn't want to talk to Ned.

Peter put his fingers in his mouth, nervously. He heard MJ's voice in his head, saying that she'd never speak to him again if he talked to Oscar. But at this point, he didn't even care. He was convinced that she didn't know what was good for her.

They finally pulled up at Oscar's house.

"Thanks, Ned." Peter muttered, trying to ignore the fact that his heart was beating out of his chest.

Ned leaned over the steering wheel to look at Peter, as he got out of the car.

"Peter...just...stop being all weird with me." Ned sighed.

And with that, Peter shut the door and Ned drove off.

Peter really hated how he had to keep lying to Ned. He missed the days when they used to do everything together and tell each other everything. He turned around and the sheer size of Oscar's house daunted him. The fact that he had to walk down a long pavement, surrounded by perfectly trimmed plants and a mowed lawn made him feel all the more anxious.

_You're doing this for MJ._ Peter thought.

And he rang the doorbell. The wait felt like forever, till the door opened and Jada was standing in front of him,

"'May I _help_ you?" She asked, batting her eyelids.

Peter wanted to roll his eyes so badly but he didn't want to get turned away.

"Is your brother home?" Peter sighed.

"Yeah....why?" Jada replied, folding her arms.

"We...have some studying to do. Are your parents home?"

"No." Jada frowned, crossing one foot over the other. Surprise, surprise - her shoes were Givenchy. "Stop asking me weird questions...he's in his room."

Peter walked in. He'd been to Oscar's house before, but he literally couldn't remember where his room was because this house was so... _big._

Peter was extremely nervous at this point. He rubbed his sweaty palms on his trousers and turned around to ask Jada where the hell he was going.

"Upstairs, first right, down the hall way, second door on your left." Jada sighed, closing the door behind Peter.

"Thanks." Peter swallowed, proceeding to climb the stairs.

He suddenly felt extremely cold. He still couldn't come to terms with the fact that the person that had hurt MJ was right under his nose all along...and that he actually considered him a _friend._

After what felt like forever, Peter was finally standing in front of Oscar's bedroom. It was a black door with Oscar's name imprinted on the wood in gold.

Peter felt sick.

Then he knocked on the door, incredibly loudly.

"Who is it?"

Oscar's familiar voice pierced the air. Peter couldn't quite believe that he was actually here, about to do this.

"It's Peter!" Peter called back.

"Oh, Peter.." Oscar laughed. "Come in."

Peter pushed the door open forcefully, before shutting the door behind him. Oscar was shirtless, wearing some Versace pants and a belt. Peter felt overwhelmed by the sheer amount of clothes and shoes that he had. Oscar was in his walk in closet, sifting through his shirts, looking for something to wear.

"I wasn't expecting you." Oscar said, not even bothering to look at Peter.

Peter felt his blood boiling. He was trying so hard not to freak out...to not start _screaming_.

"Yeah, I bet you weren't." Peter hissed.

Oscar turned around, amused by how tense Peter sounded.

"What's up, Peter?" Oscar smiled, running a hand through his thick, dark hair. He grabbed a necklace off the side of his bedside table and began to put it on.

"I think...." Peter stammered. "I think you know why I'm here."

Oscar looked puzzled for a second. He grabbed a comb, walked straight past Peter, up to his full length mirror, and began running it through his hair.

"Unfortunately..." Oscar sighed. "I'm not a mind reader...and is this gonna take long? Because, I've got a date with Maya in ten minutes-"

"Yeah, it probably _will_ take long, now that I know that you're a _psycho_ , Oscar..." Peter muttered under his breath, angry now.

"What?" Oscar replied, turning around and tilting his head slightly.

What Peter had previously thought were his handsome eyes, now seemed menacing.

"You heard me." Peter said, still standing well away from him. "You _hurt_ her."

Oscar just sighed, walking over to grab his shirt as he returned to the mirror to put it back on.

"What the _fuck_ are you talking about?" Oscar said, rolling his eyes.

Peter clenched one of his hands into a fist, unintentionally.

"I'm talking about that night?" Peter said, raising his voice now and stepping closer to Oscar. "At Liz's party? What did you do to MJ?"

Oscar looked confused till he heard the word 'MJ' and then he laughed.

"Oh my god..." Oscar said, pulling up his pants, and checking himself out in the mirror. "The girl you're fucking?"

Peter dug his fingers into the side of his thighs in frustration.

"The one you brought to the committee meeting?" Oscar kept on asking, sitting down on a chair now to tie up his shoelaces. "She didn't talk much..."

Peter was infuriated.

"Look - answer my _fucking_ question!" Peter shouted. "You know what you did to her."

"I did nothing." Oscar laughed again, his voice still clam and collected.

"Bullshit!" Peter exclaimed. "You _raped_ her, you fucking asshole! You took _advantage_ of her!"

He couldn't believe he had really just said that.

Oscar didn't even flinch, standing up now and pushing his hair back slowly. He sighed, walking up to Peter now till he so close to him, that Peter could smell the strong scent of Oscar's expensive cologne.

"Do you need a _reminder_ , Peter? Or were you too high to remember?" Oscar said, a patronizing, angry tone in his voice. "I don't know what your problem is, or why you're obsessed with MJ but...if you want the truth, we had _sex,_ I think. I'll give you the details - she was super wet...so I screwed her. That tends to be what happens when two people fuck. It wasn't the best sex I've ever had. Guess what? I can't really remember. Because I was wasted, and I'm pretty sure she was wasted too-"

Peter was already shaking his head, tears stinging at the back of his eyes because he couldn't _stand_ the way Oscar talked about her. Like she was an object.

"No, Oscar. She didn't _want_ anything to do with you. You just did that to her because you're...a piece...of shit." Peter muttered, breathing heavily.

Oscar smirked. Peter wanted to slap him across the face.

"It's probably because that was the first proper party you've been to, Peter." Oscar smiled. "But that's what happens. We get stoned, and a few people get fucked. And one of those people just happened to be MJ-"

"She passed out!" Peter shouted. "You're so sick...that you watched her pass out...she was in pain and you _kept going-"_

"I was drunk out of my mind...of course I kept going." Oscar retorted. "My God, she wouldn't shut up...I was _glad_ she passed out. She was being _annoying-"_

Peter pushed him back now. He wished he could push him out of the window.

"Do idiots like you even have feelings?" Peter shouted. "You're not even _fucking_ sorry, are you? Do you even know what she's been through, because of you? Just because _you_ decided to act like a lunatic that night. All for what? So you could feel some kind of control, Oscar? Is that what you wanted?"

"Shut the hell up, Peter." Oscar shouted, angry now. "Stop trying to play the Good Samaritan. MJ's literally a _loser._ And so were you. Until you fucked Maya - and you _suddenly_ became popular. Do you see how this all works? Do you see _me_ coming for you because you had sex with Maya-"

"You're not making any sense-""

"No, _let_ me finish!" Oscar shouted. Peter didn't think he'd ever seen him this angry before. "There's a reason that _bitch_ hasn't said anything till now. Because she freakin asked for it. She was literally begging Andrew to fuck her...and I only finished what he started. To make _her_ happy. She should be _thanking_ me. And in case you haven't realized, MJ doesn't know what's good for her. The only thing keeping her from being the biggest weirdo in school is her Dad and his connections. If it weren't for me, she'd be an even bigger loser than she already was. _I_ set her up with Andrew - _I_ gave her what all those other girls at school would have killed for...so don't you even _dare_ start this bullshit with me, Peter. If you wanted to screw MJ at Liz's party _yourself,_ you should have taken her when you had the chance, but you _didn't. You_ told her to _fuck off._ So, You're _not_ the good guy! In fact, you're a pretty shitty person, too."

Peter swallowed now. He could hardly breathe. He was frozen. There was so many things he wanted to shout but he couldn't bare to stand in front of Oscar any longer. He couldn't believe those words had just come out of his mouth.

"Just wait till her Dad finds out about this..." Peter said, his voice steady. "You can forget about M.I.T, Oscar. You can forget about all the 'street cred' you _think_ you have. The truth is that you're just a rich...little brat...and I should have realized that earlier. I was _stupid_ to ever believe that you were a decent human being."

Peter turned around and made his way to the bedroom door, opening it.

"Peter!" Oscar shouted after him.

Peter turned around, to look at him. Oscar hadn't even _moved._ He wasn't even _sorry._

"No one's going to believe you." Oscar said, before raising his middle finger.

Peter slammed the door so hard, that he felt shockwaves run through his body. He made his way downstairs into the living room. The white walls and the marble, and the leather made peter want to gag now.

He _hated_ Oscar.

As he was about to get the hell out of the house, he spotted a big bottle of rosé on the table. Peter walked up it, peering at the label on it. His heart was racing and his head was hurting. And worst of all, he wasn't sure if it was just because he was angry at himself.

_'To Sara:_   
_Thanks for being such a great boss. Have a lovely Christmas. May.'_

_May sent this?_ Peter thought. He wish she knew how awful Sara's family was and how much of a disgusting person Oscar was.

He still couldn't get Oscar's smirk out of his head. He couldn't get out that image of MJ on her bike, MJ as she screamed at Peter to get out of her house, MJ as she asked Peter to touch her, MJ as he leaned over her, sliding off her underwear. MJ as she _thanked_ him. MJ as she told Peter he was her boyfriend.

MJ as she begged Peter not to stop for the second time. MJ as she sat in his shirt, crying. MJ as Peter wiped her tears and kissed her wet cheeks. MJ as she wrapped her arms around him and he sobbed into her chest. The sharp breaths she took that night as she slept again and Peter held her.

Peter picked up the bottle slowly....and threw it at the fridge.  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Peter was on the subway now. And he was shaking. He had his earphones in his ears, and he was trying to drown out the sounds of the people around him, of the train as it jostled about and made him feel ill, and of the buzz of his phone in his pocket as Ned and Aunt May sent him countless messages.

When Peter was walking home, his phone began to ring.

It was MJ. And Peter couldn't ignore her.

"Hello?" Peter said, his voice sounding more broken than he had anticipated.

"Hey." MJ said. "Is everything okay? I've been trying to call you ever since my final ended. Then I went to your place and May told me you weren't home."

Peter closed his eyes for a second, which was stupid, because he nearly walked into a traffic light.

"Anyways..." MJ sighed. "I'm sorry about today. I can be such a pain in the ass sometimes, I know."

Peter's throat was burning. He couldn't find anything to say to her.

"Hello?" MJ asked. "Peter?"

"I'm still here." Peter sighed, stopping in his tracks. He sat down on the pavement, by a street sign , clutching the phone with one hand.

"Oh." MJ said. "Then talk to me, Peter. What's up? How did your final go?"

"Terrible." Peter muttered, putting a hand to his head.

"Oh, well...don't worry about it, Peter. you've still got a few more to go..."

Peter wasn't worried about the _stupid_ final.

"Anyways...I'll call you later...I miss you." MJ said.

Peter closed his eyes again. He tried to picture her in what she was wearing earlier. He tried to picture her soft brown eyes, and her curly hair and her white sweater, that he'd forgotten to say that he loved.

"I miss you too." Peter replied.

It all seemed like the conversation went too quickly, Peter thought. He thought about how he just wanted to go to her house and curl in bed with her and listen to her talk all night.

But the reality was, Peter had smashed a bottle of alcohol into tiny pieces...and just left it there.

He got up and began to walk, and walk. Before he knew it, he was home and waiting for May to answer the door.

When the door opened, he immediately saw May's tear - stained face and obviously knew she had been crying.

"May..." Peter started, walking into the room. "What's wrong?"

May slammed the door behind Peter. She walked up to the dinner table, shaking her head and sighing.

"I just....." she started, looking like she might cry again. "I _can't_ believe you."

Peter instantly knew what she was talking about. And his heart sank.

"May." Peter said. "I'm sorry...you don't understand-"

"No, _you_ don't understand!" May shouted. "I've lost my _job,_ Peter! Sara called me, and she was screaming at me on the phone, asking me if I even _raised_ you right...oh my God, Peter, I _did_ freakin raise you right! At least I thought I did."

Peter wanted the ground to open and swallow him up. He was lost for words.

"I..." Peter muttered, his voice shaking. "I never meant for this to happen-"

"How am I going to afford the rent and your money for school supplies and...Peter, what the _hell_ is going on?" May shouted. "Do I even _know_ you anymore? Who have you become, Peter? Because it seems to me like you're _acting out_ and behaving like a spoiled brat for no reason. I _never_ want to be disappointed in you, but Peter, I _am._ And I know your mom and Dad would be too if they were here -"

"May." Peter blurted out, his words barely a whisper.

Those words coming out of her mouth were so hurtful, that Peter felt as though his heart was tearing in two.

Peter wasn't about to tell her that he'd had the best and worst few weeks of his whole life. That he'd fallen in love with MJ. That he finally understood how much May loved Uncle Ben. That he did everything in his power to protect MJ and find out what happened to her. That Oscar was really an asshole. That he'd had sex with a girl he loved, even though he was _so_ scared of hurting her. That he'd been so drunk out of his mind, he didn't even feel real at some points. That he had a panic attack when he found out May was in hospital. That he had so much anxiety nowadays and he could hardly sleep. That he'd hardly even slept at all in the last few days. That he'd practically failed his English final. That he missed Uncle Ben and his parents more than ever. That his dreams were coming back and they were coming back more frequently. That he felt so alone.

He just didn't know where to start.

"I don't know what to say to you." Peter said, swallowing.

"Peter Benjamin Parker." May sighed. "You don't know what to say? I can't even look at you, honestly. Get _away_ from me. Go away and don't come back till you're ready to tell me."

Peter took a deep breath, before nodding.

"I'm sorry." He said again. "I understand why you're mad - and I'm sorry. I'll leave."

May didn't look up at him again. She pursed her lips, tightly, like she wanted to stop herself from saying anything more.

Peter made his way to his room, silently, feeling tears burn at the back of his eyes. He felt like he was dreaming. But he wasn't. He really _had_ pissed May off. He really _had_ made her lose her job.

He was a cancer to her.

The best thing he could do for her now was to disappear.

 


	16. Ditching

"Peter...you failed English Literature...and you didn't do well in Calculus either. We wanna know what the cause of this is...you're usually not like this when it comes to test performance..."

Peter could barely hear his principal's voice because he felt that ringing sensation in his ears again.

He didn't know what was causing it. He didn't know if it was because this was the first time he'd seen May in three days, and now she was sitting beside him, folding her arms, leaning back against the chair, and occasionally sighing and giving Peter a look that was riddled with disappointment.

He didn't know if it was because he missed MJ so much that it hurt. He'd spend the past few days at Ned's house - Ned was the only other option and was willing to let Peter crash on his couch. MJ had mentioned that she'd be spending more time at home and finishing up her final therapy sessions - she had only called Peter once or twice since then.

He'd gone to school with Ned every morning and as they took the subway, Peter had stared out of the window, trying to think about something else that wasn't MJ. That wasn't the image of his girlfriend being forced down on a bed and sexually assaulted. That wasn't her face when she told him to _never_ tell anyone. That wasn't Oscar's nonchalant tone as Peter had confronted him and he'd denied everything.

He was counting down the days until Christmas break started and he could be free of the school that he now considered as an _actual_ living hell. But he wasn't getting away lightly, because Principal Monet had taken one good look at his grade report and called May in for a meeting. Peter had come from Ned's house to meet her there, and now they were sitting in his principal's office, and Peter felt completely demoralised.

"The thing is Peter..." Principal Monet continued, pushing up his glasses. "Your Junior year is going to be one of the most important years for your GPA, and you need to start thinking about putting forward the best college application..."

Peter felt May turn to look at him again and he thought he was going to be sick. He always seemed to feel that way nowadays.

"I'll try harder..." Peter muttered, looking down at his hands. "I'm sorry...I just...I've had a rough couple of weeks and I'm finding it really hard to concentrate..."

"So can we expect you to be okay next semester, Peter?" Principal Monet said. "You're one of our best students and it will be a shame if you let yourself down now..."

"I'll be okay..." Peter said, nodding.

"I'll make sure of it..." May sighed.

 _No,_ Peter thought. _I won't be okay. I won't be fine until Oscar gets punished for what he's done._

May stood up and put her handbag around her shoulder before shaking Principal Monet's hand, and Peter felt obliged to shake his hand too, although he couldn't even force a smile.

He silently followed May out of the office and down the corridor until she stopped in her tracks suddenly and turned round to face him.

Peter saw the look of concern in her eyes and immediately felt guilty. He hadn't been honest with her at all. May used to be one of the only people on the planet who he could tell _everything_ to, and now she felt so distant.

"Peter..." May said, gently. "I know I look like the bad guy now...and I know you're stressed for whatever reason...but you've never gotten a C in your life, so-"

"I know, May..." Peter said, shaking his head. "I've already said that I'll get it together next semester, so...can we just move on?"

"This is more than just you getting a few bad grades, Peter..." May said, pushing his curls away from his face. Peter had started to hate it when she did that, and the only person who he wanted to touch his hair was MJ.

He flinched.

"You've already practically disowned me May..." he said. "What's different now? Why do you suddenly care?"

"Peter..."

"You _act_ like you understand but you just don't. You don't-"

"Peter!"

"Just _leave_ May. I don't know why you even came."

She looked at him again with that face of disappointment and Peter felt his heart sinking. He wished he'd never said that.

"Fine..." May said. "You can go back to Ned's house and stay there. But I'm _family,_ Peter. Your friends will come and go but I'll always be there for you and I always have been. You have to remember that..."

Peter watched as she turned and walked down the hallway towards the double doors that led her outside.

He wanted to run after her and let her embrace him in a hug and tell her everything but he knew he couldn't. He knew he couldn't break MJ's trust and risk losing her forever.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


The next day at school, Peter felt like he could think more straight. He'd actually gotten a decent night of sleep and he and Ned had played video games the evening before, which took the edge off things a little bit.

He could feel the gazes of other people on him through his peripheral vision as he opened his locker and proceeded to take a few textbooks out of it.

 _Just one more week, Peter,_ he thought. _One more week and it'll be over._

"Should we order some takeout tonight?" Ned said, leaning against the locker next to Peter's. "That Chinese place doesn't close till ten..."

"Sounds good..." Peter said, shutting his locker.

He liked to think about things that would happen after the school day had finished. Every morning, his anxiety had gotten worse and it was like he was waiting for something bad to happen but he didn't know what.

Peter was about to make a left into his first class but then he thought he saw MJ in the distance and his heart skipped a beat.

It _was_ her. Her hair cascaded down her shoulders and she was wearing a grey long sleeved sweater and blue jeans. It reminded Peter of the morning after he stayed at her house and how they had had such an amazing breakfast, and how he had decided that he loved her.

She was standing at the end of the hallway and was in full conversation with Andrew, the same guy that left MJ in that room all by herself.

"Woah...MJ's back again?" Ned whispered, leaning towards Peter.

Peter didn't know why MJ wouldn't just tell him that she was planning to go to school today. He wondered if she was still angry that he had mentioned confronting Oscar, which he _did_ anyway.

"I guess..." Peter said, quietly.

He hated Andrew more than ever now. He hated the thought of him playing a part in what had happened to her.

Peter said goodbye to Ned before walking up to where MJ and Andrew were standing. She turned round to look at Peter and smiled at him, her brown eyes glistening again. He didn't think he had ever seen her _this_ normal and _this_ happy. He knew he had made that observation a lot, but this time, it was more apparent in the way she stood and how relaxed she came across.

But Peter asked himself why this made him feel more disturbed. He almost wished that she wasn't so happy, so it would give him more of an excuse to report Oscar and make him pay for what he did.

"Hey Peter..." Andrew smiled, as he approached both of them. "I feel like I haven't seen you in a while..."

"Yeah..." Peter said, passively ignoring him. "Do you mind if I steal MJ away from you for a bit?"

He took MJ's hand, and immediately realized it was the first sign of PDA he had ever displayed in front of anyone, and wasn't really sure if MJ was okay with it, but then she kissed him on the cheek quickly, which took him a little by surprise.

"Give us a second, Andrew?..." MJ said.

"Sure..." Andrew replied, starting to walk slowly in the other direction. "You guys are really cute together..."

"What?" Peter said, but Andrew was already gone.

He couldn't believe that he had actually said that. Andrew had always seemed like he was contending with Peter for MJ.

Peter caught Flash's eye as he walked past them, down the corridor.

"Hey, Michelle." Flash called out.

Flash had two girls walking either side of him who sniggered. Peter didn't know who they were, but they were definitely seniors.

"What is it, Flash?" MJ sighed.

Peter felt her grip on his hand tighten.

"Oh, nothing." Flash smirked, stopping in his tracks and re-adjusting his bag on his shoulder. "Nice of you to show up to school today. A little birdy told me you were giving out free blow jobs. I'm free fifth period if you wanna let off some steam...."

As Peter felt his blood boiling, one of the girls behind Flash burst out laughing, and then soon, all _three_ of them were laughing. Then Flash turned around and continued walking.

"You _wish."_ Peter called out, his hand still in MJ's.

"It's okay, Peter." MJ whispered.

"Yeah, just ignore him." Peter said behind, gritted teeth, loud enough so Flash could still hear him. "He's a _jerk!"_

Flash didn't flinch.

Peter turned around to MJ.

"Are you alright?" He asked her.

MJ just sighed, biting her lip before looking down.

"Come on. I need to talk to you." Peter said, before quickly leading her into the janitor's closet and locking the door behind them.

"What do you wanna say, Parker?" MJ said, moving her hand slowly up his arm.

Peter didn't want to say anything. He stared into her eyes for a bit before leaning in to kiss her, slowly. He put his hands on her waist and she kissed him back, moaning softly against his lips.

Peter broke away for a second.

"I missed you..." Peter said, his face so close to hers that their noses were touching.

"Me too..." MJ replied. "I'm sorry that I'm so shit at texting you back. Coming to school this morning was sort of a last minute decision..."

"It's okay..."

"I called May to ask if you were home and she said that you're staying at Ned's house now...is everything okay?"

Peter sighed.

"May's...mad at me. My grades are slipping and we got into a huge fight a few days ago..." He said.

"I'm sure you'll figure things out..." MJ said, putting her arms around Peter's neck.

Peter really hoped so. He really hoped for a way for May to let him come back home without him having to tell his life story to _her_ , and without her having to ask so many questions.

"You're just such a good kid, Parker..." MJ said. "I don't know why anyone would be mad at you like that."

Peter knew why but he didn't want to tell her.

"Thanks..." he said, smiling.

MJ kissed him quickly again.

"You're the _best."_ she said softly, leaning in to put her forehead to his.

Peter's heart skipped a beat, and as he kissed her again, he remembered it was what _he_ had said to her before.

It was a more intense kiss this time and Peter felt that electrical feeling run through him again.

He kissed her until her back collided gently with a shelf, before letting his hands make their way up her stomach. He caressed her bra strap with his fingers, and wanted to unclip it _so badly_.

He could feel her heart rate quicken as he kissed her neck, slowly. Nothing seemed to feel unusual about them doing this _at_ school.

MJ broke away, hurriedly pulling her sweater over her head and tossing it to the ground.

Peter thought she was just as beautiful as all the other times he had seen her half naked.

She put her lips to his again and she was smiling uncontrollably now. He knew that _she_ knew that this was totally crazy. His hands moved down to MJ's waist again, and he proceeded to unbutton her jeans before pulling them off her legs.

Peter knew that class started in ten minutes but part of him didn't seem to care.

He continued to kiss her, moving away from her shoulder and bending down to put his lips on her stomach. MJ moaned a little, placing her hands in his hair and running her fingers through it.

He stood up again to kiss her and he felt her fiddle with the buttons of his trousers.

"MJ..." Peter said quietly, looking at her. "Are we actually gonna-"

"Do you _want_ to?" MJ said, slightly out of breath now.

"I mean I _do_ but..." Peter began, laughing a little. "Physics is about to start."

MJ sighed heavily, looking up at Peter again.

Her eyes were truly beautiful, he thought.

"Can you just..." she started.

"Huh?" Peter said, still trying to catch his breath.

It took him a second to realize that MJ was really desperate to _feel_ something. He touched the rim of her underwear with his fingers.

He looked up at her again, as if to make sure she was okay with what he was doing.

"After you do this...just take me home...I'll say I felt sick..." MJ said. "I...I can't go back in there..."

Peter nodded, before slowly sliding his hands down her underwear. He felt around her for a second, his hands shaking, but then finally slid his fingers inside her. MJ moaned a bit louder this time.

"Peter..." she sighed, throwing her head back to look at the ceiling for a second.

"Shh...MJ..." Peter whispered warningly. The last thing he wanted was for someone to hear them from outside.

"How am I just supposed to be fucking...silent...while you're doing this..." MJ said, but her voice was quiet now.

Peter felt himself smile a little, and he continued as he heard MJ swear under her breath occasionally.

"Peter..." MJ gasped again softly, shutting her eyes.

He could feel her body tensing up slightly.

"Hey, relax..." Peter whispered, moving his free hand up her thigh. "Relax."

MJ eventually did, and the truth was Peter kind of _liked_ being in control. He loved being the one to touch her, and hear her feel pleasure. He loved it when she said his name. His fingers moved steadily in and out of her, watching as her heart rate began to quicken again and her chest began to rise and fall.

 _Oh my God,_ Peter thought. He was in a janitor's closet, at school, doing _this_ to MJ and completely ignoring the fact that he was now missing class.

MJ put her arms around his neck again, burying her head into his shoulders. She moaned softly again and Peter thought about just how much he'd missed all of this, and just how much more _human_ he felt when he was with her.

"Keep going." MJ whispered.

"Mmm?" Peter mumbled, turned on now just from listening to her. He could barely think _or_ hear what she was saying.

"I said keep _going_." MJ said again, louder. He felt her fingers dig into his neck, as she gasped.

"I _am."_ Peter whispered.

He knew the door was locked but he was still scared that someone might barge in.

MJ kissed Peter again. He thought about how badly she was hurting, and how all he wanted to do was make her happy forever. He kept glancing up at her, his hand moving effortlessly now.

MJ's moans became a little stifled - Peter wasn't sure if she was crying.

"Am I...hurting you?" He asked her.

"No." MJ said, shaking her head before laying her head down on his shoulder again. "I'm sorry-"

He knew she was thinking about everything that had happened to her that night.

"You're okay..." Peter said softly. "I'm here."

He kissed her neck slowly, closing his eyes now and slowing down, till he felt the rise and fall of her chest become steady.

When he had finished, MJ let out another huge sigh of relief before kissing him quickly for a final time.

"Thanks..." she said, panting. "I'll pay you back, Peter. I promise."

Maybe the curse had been lifted. Maybe he just needed to put them both out of their misery by forgetting about Liz's party and everything that MJ had told him.

Peter grabbed some paper towel from the shelf behind MJ, wiping his fingers, his heart still racing, before tossing it in the trash.

"It's okay." he said again, reaching over to pick up her sweater and handing it to her.

It was enough for Peter to see her orgasm. He'd unintentionally become used to bringing her to that point - something he'd never thought he'd be used to before. He thought about how _calm_ he was, but how badly he just wanted to be inside her again.

He thought about the promise he'd made to May about not slacking and getting serious in class, but all of him just wanted to ditch school with MJ now and never come back.

He watched as she put her jeans back on and slipped on her shoes.

"Let's get out of here..." Peter whispered, taking her hand and leading her out.

They tried to stay low and out of sight as they passed all the classrooms that were now filled with students starting their first period of class.

They finally made it out of school and it only took MJ a few minutes to locate her Dad's car. She tossed Peter the keys and he unlocked it, before letting herself in.

"I hope no one realizes we ditched..." MJ said, as Peter climbed into the driver's seat next to her.

"They probably will..." Peter said, placing his hand on the steering wheel. "But at least I can't get into any _more_ trouble with May."

"That's true..." MJ smiled, touching Peter's shoulder. "I already know that my dad is going to fucking kill me...but I couldn't care less. Can we go get some Chick-Fil-A? I'm kinda hungry..."

"Yeah...yeah sure..." Peter said, starting up the car and reversing out of the parking space.

He thought about how he owed no one at that school anything now. He thought about how miserable that place had made him and how now, he just wanted to drive as far away from it as possible. Even if it meant getting into a little bit of trouble.

They drove around for a few minutes until they ended up at a Chick-Fil-A drive through nearby. MJ offered to pay for the food but Peter had been persistent that it was on him.

MJ told Peter that her Dad had been out of town on a business trip and wasn't supposed to be back until later that evening, so Peter drove them both back to her house.

They sat on the floor of her modern and stylish living room, eating their food and drinking their smoothies.

"Is yours strawberry?..." MJ asked Peter, eyeing his drink. "Can I try some?"

Peter moved his straw towards her and let her have a sip.

"That's good..." MJ said, nodding. "Ugh, this is so much better than the Midtown crap we would have been served today."

"I know, right?" Peter said, rolling his eyes.

There was a silence as MJ began to eat the rest of Peter's chips that he'd left unattended. It had become normal to Peter that she had a way bigger appetite than him, and that she often finished his own food whenever they ate together.

"My Mom...called yesterday..." MJ said, looking up at him.

"Really?" Peter replied, his eyes widening.

"Yeah...it was weird. Since she left, she's never really called. Only occasionally, on like my birthday and stuff. And even then, it's not like she sends me a card or a present or anything."

"Where does she live?" Peter asked.

"She moved to Chicago. I'm pretty sure she has a boyfriend now or something. She told me on the phone yesterday that she wants me to fly over there and spend Christmas and New Years with her..."

"Are you gonna go?..."

"I don't know...I've sort of hated her for years...and now, I guess I'm not that mad at her anymore. Her and my Dad just didn't work out and I kind of understand that...it's not really either of their faults. It would be nice to finally see her again but...I kinda just wanna stay here...with you..."

"You don't have to do that..." Peter said, shaking his head. "I'm sure I can survive without you for a few weeks."

"I find that very hard to believe..." MJ said, smiling. "You can barely go twenty four hours without worrying about me..."

"That _might_ be true..." Peter replied, smiling back at her.

He wanted her to enjoy her break from school and spend time with her mom, but part of him couldn't bear the thought of her being that far away from him.

MJ got up to play some music from her speakers, and her and Peter just lay on the carpet on the floor, getting over all the food they had just eaten, and occasionally singing along to the lyrics from their favourite songs.

MJ was on her phone, scrolling through her social media. Peter was just watching her, and she lay so close to him that her hair touched the side of his face.

His eyes began to close and he thought he was about to drift off to sleep, but then was pretty sure that he heard MJ swear under her breath.

He opened his eyes and MJ was frowning at her phone screen, tears stinging at the back of her eyes.

"What the _fuck?"_ MJ muttered again.

"What happened?" Peter asked, leaning in closer to see what was on her screen.

It looked like a picture from a conversation on a WhatsApp group. It took Peter's sleepy brain a few seconds to register that it was that _same_ group that Andrew had been sending messages to the night after Liz's party. It was now on everyone's Instagram story.

It was another text that Andrew had sent to that group.

_'MJ and I NEVER had sex. She wants everyone to believe that so no one thinks she's a loser. We made out for a while and then I just left her there because I didn't have a condom. We've been keeping up this lie for a while now, and so far, it's worked. She's not a slut...because she's never gotten laid. She's just a desperate liar and I was just going along with it so her Dad could write me a good reference for college.'_

Peter thought he was nearly going to have a heart attack when he saw who had posted it. The photo was a screenshot from Oscar's Instagram and it was captioned 'the truth...'

Peter felt sick.

He watched for a second as MJ's facial expression changed, her lips parting slightly, and as she frantically sat up to scroll through all the comments.

Peter sat up too and tried to take her phone out of her hands but MJ flinched.

"Why would Oscar post this..." MJ said, her facial expression and tone blank.

Peter's heart started to beat faster again. He didn't know _what_ to say. If Oscar had posted that picture to publicly humiliate MJ, then it was obviously his way of getting back at Peter for confronting him.

"I don't know..." Peter lied.

MJ tossed her phone to the other side of the room angrily.

"First I'm a slut...now I'm a desperate liar..." she said, turning to look at Peter. "Why would Oscar _do_ that? Someone must have said something to make him act out."

MJ looked at Peter again.

"MJ, why are you looking at me like that?" Peter said, raising his voice a little.

"Did you talk to him, Peter?" MJ shouted.

"Talk to who!"

" _Don't_ even act like you don't know what I'm talking about..." MJ said, tears rolling down her cheeks.

"I don't..." Peter lied, his voice shaky again.

MJ just sighed frustratedly, before standing up and making her way over to the dining table and sitting down on the edge of it. Peter swore under his breath before getting up to follow her.

"MJ..." Peter said. "Just look at me."

MJ still had her arms folded, staring at the floor. Peter _hated_ this. He hated feeling like he was talking to a brick wall.

" _Look_ at me, MJ..." Peter said again, raising his voice again.

MJ looked up at him, angry and confused.

"You can't keep doing this..." Peter sighed.

"Doing what-"

"Hiding. Your. _Emotions,_ MJ. Running away from your problems. Not coming to school. Pretending like you're okay when you're not!"

"Did you _talk_ to him, Peter-"

"It doesn't fucking matter!"

"I _swear_ Peter, if you talked to Oscar-"

"Then what? What's going to happen?"

"I'm _never_ going to have a normal life again. I mean, can't you see that?

There was a short silence as MJ sat there and Peter closed his eyes, trying to get his thoughts together.

"This isn't a normal life..." Peter said, quietly. "I know you don't wanna hear that, but I'm telling it to you straight. You can't _protect_ someone who's done something wrong. You deserve to tell people you trust what happened to you...and you deserve for them to listen to you...and help you..."

"Peter, stop-"

" _I'll_ never have a normal life knowing that everyday, you'll go to the same school as the same person who did that to you, MJ!"

"Don't you dare make this about you..." MJ said, her voice quiet now.

"It's _not_ about me..."

Suddenly, Peter heard someone fiddle with the lock on the front door. He could only think that it was MJ's Dad, and that he was probably home from work early.

"Shit..." MJ muttered.

The door opened and it _was_ MJ's Dad. He looked smart in a business suit, a navy blue tie and immaculately polished shoes. He was carrying a black briefcase and Peter could smell his cologne from where he was standing.

He looked shocked to see both of them standing there, and Peter wasn't surprised. They were supposed to be in school right now, and not here, screaming at each other.

Walter looked over at MJ, then back at Peter, then at MJ again.

"Michelle Jones..." He said, his voice stern and low. "We need to talk."

"Dad..." MJ began, but her voice trailed off.

Walter walked over to the dining table and dragged out a chair, before sitting on it.

"Sit down..." he said, looking at MJ. "You too, Peter."

Peter felt like he was going to faint. He didn't know what was worse - the feeling of his throat burning up or the sheer state of panic he thought he was now in.

MJ reluctantly took a seat opposite her Dad, her whole body stiff with frustration. Peter took the seat next to her.

Walter sighed before leaning forward and placing his elbows on the table.

"Why are you both not in school right now?" Walter said.

Peter's heart skipped a beat again.

"It's _my_ fault..." Peter said. "I wanted to miss class today so I took MJ with me."

"That's bullshit, Peter..." MJ said, matter-of-factly. "It was my idea."

"Either way..." Walter began. "Both of you shouldn't be skipping class, _at all."_

Peter swallowed and looked at MJ, who was just staring at her Dad menacingly.

Walter brought out his phone and typed his passcode into it, before placing it on the table to reveal a screenshot of an Instagram page. It was Flash's. The private account he'd been using to bully MJ all this time.

Walter had drawn their attention to that picture that Peter _hated_ \- the one Tyler took of MJ in her torn dress. It was worse now that Peter knew the context behind it.

MJ put a hand to her head before sighing. It was like Peter could _feel_ how stressed she was.

"What do you want me to say Dad?..." she said, starting to sob.

"I want you to explain what the _hell_ is going on in this picture, and why your dress is ripped in it."

Peter wanted the ground to swallow him up then and there. Things would be much easier that way, he thought.

"It was on the night of Liz's party..." MJ sniffed. "I was drunk and I don't remember what happened..."

Peter didn't want to say anything. He knew he had just given MJ a lecture about telling the truth, but now, he was so scared of Walter and his reaction...that he just wanted to lie about the whole thing.

" _Why_ are they still calling you a slut, MJ?" Walter asked. "Are you sleeping around? Is that what's happening now?"

Peter could feel his blood boiling.

"Are you _serious,_ Dad?" MJ shouted. "Is that really what you think of me?"

"You _better_ not be sleeping around, Michelle..." Walter retorted.

"Dad, you are _crazy_..." MJ said, shrugging. "I honestly can't believe you just said that to me."

"MJ doesn't...do that...sir..." Peter said, his voice sounding way more unsure than he wanted it to.

"So you're _not_ going around having unprotected sex, MJ?" Walter said.

MJ groaned in frustration, tears still falling down her cheeks. Peter wanted to punch Walter in the face.

"No she's not, sir..." Peter replied, answering the question for her.

"And you two?" Walter asked. "Are you two sleeping with each other now?"

Peter sighed. It felt like his mind was doing gymnastics. He felt MJ's hand grip his own under the table.

"Yes..." Peter said.

"Peter, don't even give him any satisfaction by saying anything..." MJ said, angrily.

Walter looked at Peter again.

"But can you explain this picture, Peter?" he said.

Peter shook his head.

"No..." he said, his heart racing. "I don't know what happened sir. Everyone was really drunk at that party..."

"I _hope_ you're not lying to me, Peter..." Walter said.

"I..." Peter stammered.

"Peter..." MJ said, looking at him.

He didn't want to hurt MJ, but he was pissed at the fact that anyone would ever suggest that she was just sleeping around...after all she'd been through.

"I don't know what happened..." Peter lied, again.

Walter leaned back on his chair, putting his phone back in his pocket.

"MJ..." Walter said, sternly. "Get up and go to your room. You're grounded. Don't even make me say it again-"

"Dad!" MJ shouted.

"Don't even _make_ me say it again!" Walter shouted back.

MJ stood up and made her way over the stairs, still crying.

"I can't believe you, Dad..." she said to him, before disappearing up the stairs.

Peter just sat there, his heart still beating out of his chest. He felt as if his legs were locked to the ground.

"You shouldn't have done that, sir..." Peter said, looking straight at Walter.

" _Excuse me-"_

"You don't know what she's been through..." Peter said, and he could feel his body tensing up. "MJ's got a thick skin...and she hides her pain because she doesn't wanna burden you. You need to stop _giving_ her everything and start listening to her. You need to stop being so absent and be her _Dad._ She needs someone. She doesn't even know what's best for her yet...and the worst thing is that you don't either. I _love her_ , sir. Every day that goes by, I love her even more. But she's _scared._ She's scared of what everyone will think if she opens up. She's the strongest person I know...but maybe she shouldn't have to be so strong all the time."

Peter's mind flashed back to that day when MJ had showed up to his house, with a box of Hawaiian pizza, a smile on her face.

"If you want to know the truth..." Peter continued. "You're going to have to ask her yourself. But _not_ like this..."

Peter stood up from the table, before grabbing his things quickly and making his way towards the door. He took one last glimpse at Walter's puzzled face as he made he finally left.

Peter didn't want to cry. He wiped the tears from his face quickly and just began walking. It was starting to get dark outside and it was freezing, but he knew where he was going. And it wasn't Ned's house.

As he walked, he kept picturing MJ's face as she went up those marble stairs. He'd seen her at her best and at her worst all in once day. He regretted taking her home, and he regretted shouting at her.

He wanted all of this to come to an end. He wanted Oscar to be held accountable, and that was that.

He finally came up to the door of his apartment, knocking on it persistently.

He was praying May was home.

He heard some shuffling from inside and the sound of her footsteps approaching the door.

May opened it, took one look at Peter, them wrapped her arms around him. It was like she could _feel_ his sadness and knew exactly what to do at that moment. He hugged her back, wanting to reverse time to when he was little, when he could just stay in those hugs forever.

"Oh Peter..." May sighed, rubbing his back for a bit.

May broke away from the hug, touching his face. Peter knew that his eyes were now probably red and that he was shaking for no reason.

"Are you okay, honey?" May said, calmly.

Peter shut his eyes for a few seconds before opening them again.

"I need to tell you something..." he said.

 


	17. Winter Formal

When Peter sat down on the couch with May, he felt like he was a little kid again, telling May about a bully at school. In that moment, he felt so vulnerable, so broken and so consumed with frustration, that he really just wanted to scream.

It was early evening outside - May was not going out to her night shift, because she _had_ lost her job. Instead, she was in her bright pink pajamas, and she pushed her glasses up her face as she curled up on the couch with her coffee.

"I just want you to always feel like you can tell me anything, Peter." She sighed, reaching over to touch Peter's hands.

Peter's heart started to beat a little faster. He bit his lip, before sighing heavily.

"I know..." he said, not realizing how hurt he sounded. "I'm sorry I haven't been honest with you."

May nodded, and she began to rub Peter's arm.

"Where do you wanna start?" May asked, tilting her head slightly.

Peter looked up at her.

"Liz's party." He gulped. "Apparently, a lot more went down than me getting totally wasted...it's just...MJ..."

His voice trailed off for a second. May gripped Peter's hand and Peter was glad she did that, because he really hated talking about this whole thing.

"I always suspected something had happened to her." Peter continued. "She took me home, but I remember her dress was ripped and she looked so... _sad."_

May continued to nod. He loved it when she listened to him, and how she never really reacted to anything he was saying, till he was finished.

"So I...I spent the next few weeks just trying to figure it out. She wouldn't tell me...I was just so scared of _hurting_ her. I tried to ask her, but she always just brushed it off or made it clear that she didn't want to talk about it. On top of that, everyone at school acted like _jerks._ Flash had this private Instagram and he was calling her...a _slut_ and she told me she had sex with this guy called Andrew-"

"Wait, wait, wait...." May mumbled, trying to make sense of it all. "MJ had sex with someone else?"

"No." Peter sighed. "I mean...it's not like that...she said she had sex with this guy called Andrew on the night of Liz's party...and suddenly, she was popular for it."

May took a deep breath.

"Have you two..." May said, before biting her lip. "You know?"

"Had sex?" Peter said. "Yeah."

"Okay." May said. "I'm sorry I keep asking, I know it's personal-"

"No, it's okay." Peter said, sitting up a little before putting his hands in his hair. "I kind of...have never talked about it with anyone else before. I mean, Ned wanted me to talk to him about it, but it just felt _wrong."_

May smiled at Peter.

"The first time we...tried..." Peter said, as May looked into his eyes, a concentrated expression on her face. "She just kind of gave up half way. She told me she couldn't do it, and obviously, I was okay with that. But I thought it was more than her just not feeling like it. And that someone had _hurt_ her."

May inhaled sharply.

"So you were investigating what happened to her? Behind her back?" May asked.

"Yeah, it sounds pretty dumb, but it brought Ned and I back together, because we weren't even talking before....we had a huge argument after Liz's party. Anyways, we thought maybe Andrew would have had something to do with it, but turns out, he didn't. And then I met Oscar and he was so... _nice._ It was weird. And I kind of thought maybe I was just overreacting about the whole MJ thing."

May was _still_ listening. She had now moved closer to Peter, her hand still on his and she would occasionally push his curls out of his face, which just made him feel.... _safe._

"But then, MJ and I became closer. Before...I really just hated the whole _love_ thing...May, you know I used to think it was stupid but I think I might actually....you know..."

" _Love_ her?" May smiled, pushing her glasses up her nose again.

"Yeah, I guess." Peter said, realizing he was smiling now too. "And we _did_ end up having sex...and it was.... _great-"_

Peter inhaled sharply. He could hardly believe he had just said that to her.

"Really?" May said, squeezing Peter's hand a little.

"Mm hmm." Peter said, fiddling with the watch on his wrist. "It just felt like...like I didn't want to be with anyone else. And I was scared at first. Of hurting her. But...it was just so _special_ and I just felt like I wanted to protect her forever, you know?"

"I know." May said, as Peter looked up at her. "I wanted to protect Ben so badly, I want to protect _you."_

May placed a hand on his cheek, and he sort of choked up a little, but he wasn't going to cry because he was tired of that.

"Then the night you were at the hospital, she told me everything." Peter gulped, closing his eyes for a bit. "How Andrew led her upstairs but she didn't end up having sex with him. How Oscar and this other guy called Brian were interrogating her about her Dad. How she asked _me_ to get her out of there, but I was too drunk...or high...to even remember what she was saying - this senior called Tyler put something in my drink but...May, that's another story - and...I screamed at her and told her I wouldn't help her because I was angry, I guess...for some stupid reason. And she told me how...Oscar _forced_ himself on her. And she didn't realize it was that big of a deal till we started dating. And those dreams of Mom and Dad and that plane came back."

May's lips parted slightly.

"Oh, Peter." She sighed, pulling him into a hug. He smelt her warm, familiar scent, and best of all, he felt so _good_ that he had told someone how he was feeling.

May broke the hug.

"Does MJ's Dad know, honey?" She asked Peter.

Peter shook his head.

"No one knows." Peter said. "But I confronted Oscar and he was such a douche about it - that's why I threw the bottle...I'm sorry, May...I'm still so sorry-"

"It's okay, Peter. Your Uncle Dave has been more help than you can imagine, Peter. And...I hope I can finally do something I really love...that's not doing night shifts at a car rental for Sara."

Peter nodded. All he wanted was the best for her.

"MJ's Dad confronted us today about Flash's Instagram page and a photo that he posted of MJ that night. And MJ _still_ hasn't told him....I just got so angry at him, for speaking to her in the way he does...like he _always_ does...like she's some science project." He said.

May sighed again.

"I don't know what to do." Peter finally said.

May put her fingers to her lips, just like she always did when she was thinking. Peter always did the same thing.

"If Oscar won't own up, Peter....I'm going to have to talk to Sara about it." May said. "I know MJ wants to keep it private and all...but there really needs to be some consequences for his actions. That is _not_ okay."

Peter was glad someone else felt the same way.

" _You_ just keep being there for her, okay?" She said. "It's a really hard time for her, trying to come to terms with what happened to her and how she feels."

Peter smiled at May again.

"Thanks, May." He said, as he hugged his knees in on the couch.

"Welcome back, Peter." May said, raising her pinkie finger. "From now on, let's just be honest with each other. No more lying, no more secrets?"

Peter grabbed May's pinkie with his own.

"No more lying, no more secrets." He whispered, before May kissed him on the forehead.

"Leave it to me." She said. "Everything will be okay."

Peter was so happy that May wasn't working that night. They sat and watched TV together, and May cooked a shepherd's pie for dinner, and Peter was impressed because it actually tasted really good. Then Peter got showered and changed, and May made him a huge mug of hot chocolate and marshmallows - and he drank it _all,_ before heading to bed.

"Goodnight, May." Peter said, as he headed to his room.

"Goodnight, Peter. Sweet dreams." May said, as she headed to _her_ room.

Peter brushed his teeth, then switched off the lights in his room before climbing into his bed. It felt so good to be back in his own room - May had even changed the sheets and cleaned up a little bit. It's almost like she knew he would be back soon.

MJ hadn't texted him at all. And Peter wasn't surprised - he was so scared of everything that went down with her Dad after he'd left.

Peter lay down and put his head to his pillow. He was asleep before he knew it, and woke up to his phone buzzing by his bed side table. It was a FaceTime request and MJ's caller ID popped up.

Peter rubbed his eyes, before switching on his lamp next to him. It was 1am.

_Please be okay, MJ,_ he thought, as he picked up his phone and sat up before answering the call.

MJ's sweet and familiar face came up on the screen. Her hair was tied back and she was wearing her white Joan of Arc T-shirt.

"Hey, Parker." She said, smiling a little. "You look tired."

Peter was so relieved that she wasn't crying.

"I'm sorry." Peter said. "About this afternoon."

"Don't apologize." She sighed. "I just want to thank you because...I told my Dad everything-"

"What?" Peter said, shocked.

He gripped his phone tighter, laying down and turning over unto his side.

"How'd it...go?" Peter said, barely breathing.

"I cried a little. _He_ cried a little. It was just very... _raw._ I'd never seen him that patient - he just _listened_ to me for once. And he told me everything would be okay. I asked him not to make a big deal, but of course he wants to talk to Oscar's mom...and I get it." MJ said.

"Okay." Peter said. "Well, I'm so happy about the way your Dad took things..."

"Yeah, well...I'm guessing it was because of you. So thanks." MJ said.

He could tell she was now getting in her covers, and wished so badly that he was next to her, and he could pull her close.

"I..." Peter stammered. "I told May. I know you didn't want me to tell anyone, but I _know_ we can trust her-"

"That's fine, Peter." MJ said, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. "I'm glad you talked to someone about it."

Peter was so happy to hear her say that. He looked at his screen...at _her._ All he wanted to do was kiss her and hug her, but he couldn't. And it was honestly painful.

"I was gonna ask you to Winter Formal, but....I don't want to go. I don't want to see anyone at school." Peter sighed.

"Me neither, to be honest." MJ said, before yawning. "But we can have our own winter formal."

Peter laughed.

"What?" He asked.

"My Dad said he'll sort something out for us....because I talked about Winter Formal, and how I'm definitely _not_ going." MJ said, in a matter-of-fact tone that Peter loved.

"That would be super cool." He said, feeling more and more tired.

"Don't fall asleep on me, Parker, I need to ask you something else." MJ said.

"Mmm?" Peter said, exhausted.

"So after 'Winter Formal', hosted at _my_ house...my Dad agreed that we both need a break...so...he knows this really nice resort upstate from here. He used to go there with my Mom during the holidays. He's booked three days for the both of us...just to _relax..._ I mean, if you want to come..." MJ said.

She looked back at Peter, her eyes hopeful.

Peter really couldn't believe her Dad would do do that for her. That her Dad would personally arrange for her to have her own mini private Winter Formal at her house and also send them on a mini vacation.

"Yeah." Peter chuckled. "MJ, that sounds _insane_ but I really love the idea."

"Good." MJ smiled. "So, dress up nicely in your suit then pack enough for three days - bring your swim stuff as well, I heard there's a _great_ jacuzzi. You can drive us in my Dad's old car, right?"

Peter's head was spinning. He couldn't wait to be _alone_ with her for three days.

"Sure." Peter said, feeling like he was dreaming for a second.

"At least we can get away from everyone for a bit. I personally do not want to be here when my Dad and May are _interrogating_ Sara." MJ said.

"That's very true."

"I'm exhausted."

"Me too."

Peter felt that numbing sensation once again. He always felt that when he was talking to MJ and he was _sure_ he was in love with her and she didn't feel _real._

"Don't end the call, Peter." MJ whispered, getting up to prop up her phone on the windowsill.

Peter could now see that she was only wearing her Joan of Arc T-shirt and some black underwear. He watched her climb into her bed.

"What are you doing?" He laughed.

"It'll be like you're here. But you aren't." MJ replied, reaching up to switch off the lights above her headboard.

The light that shone through from her windowsill helped Peter see her face clearly from his phone screen.

Peter switched off his lamp too. He propped his phone up against a textbook on his bedside table, and got back into bed properly.

"Goodnight, MJ." He said.

She didn't reply. She was already asleep, and he could hear the faint rise and fall of her chest.

He didn't end the call. He didn't care that by the time he woke up, his phone would probably be dead. He just closed his eyes and listened to the sound of her breathing softly. And before he knew it, he was asleep too.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


It was the day of 'Winter Formal', also known as the day Peter and MJ would leave on their mini getaway upstate. Peter had gone to school, right up to Christmas break, without MJ of course, and he had been on the committee for the _real_ Winter Formal but he had lied to Liz that him and May were leaving for vacation early, and that he wouldn't be able to attend.

The annoying thing about it all was that Oscar wasn't at any committee meetings. In fact, he had pretty much disappeared, and no one seemed shocked or surprised. Peter had asked Maya where Oscar was and Maya had just said that Oscar had family issues and it was 'none of Peter's business.' So Peter hadn't asked again.

This meant that neither Walter nor May had got the chance to talk Sara. They had both tried calling her but her phone either just rang or was switched off. They both promised Peter and MJ that they _would_ talk to her and hold Oscar accountable.

So Peter hadn't worried much about that for a few days.

Christmas break was finally here, and Peter was beginning to think it would never come and that he would be stuck in what felt like the longest semester of his life.

He was standing in front of the mirror, buttoning up his shirt. There was something that felt a bit strange but surprisingly comforting, putting on Uncle Ben's old suit.

May knocked on his door.

"Come in." He said.

May opened the door and immediately smiled. She was in her dressing gown, and she stood behind Peter, so Peter could see her in the mirror.

"Wow, Peter." May said. "You look so handsome. You _have_ to let me take your picture."

"Sure." Peter said, slipping his jacket on.

He surprised himself at how _grown_ up _he_ looked. May turned him around to him and straightened up his jacket, before grabbing his tie from his bed and placing it round his collar, beginning to do it up for him.

"Thank you." Peter said to May.

"You're welcome." May said, just as she finished. "Don't forget your corsage."

"Oh...right." Peter said, turning around to pick up the white rose that was in a box.

May had bought it for him to give to MJ.

Peter put on some cologne, then his watch, then grabbed his small suitcase, before dragging it out to the living room.

May got her phone out, taking pictures of Peter who was standing by the dining table, trying his best not to look awkward.

"Okay, one more." May said, just as Peter thought he had been blinded by the flash more than enough times. "Now, we'll go."

May helped Peter with his suitcase and then they both went down the elevator, and then Peter put his bag in the trunk and sat beside May in the front seat.

"I'm going to miss you, Peter." May sighed, as she put on her seatbelt.

"It's only till Monday, May." Peter replied, putting on his own seatbelt again.

"Just, have fun, okay? You deserve it-"

"What, for getting _bad_ grades?" Peter chuckled.

"Peter, you got _one_ C....and you were going through a lot. And I'm sorry I was so hard on you." May said, starting the car. "You both need this break. So just, have fun - and be safe."

"Of course." Peter said, as May began driving.

It felt so good to be in the car with May as they both sang along to their favorite songs and insulted New Yorkers about their driving skills. It just felt like old times.

When May pulled up on MJ's driveway, she got out and pulled Peter's suitcase out. Peter got out too, then May hugged him.

"I'll see you soon. Keep me updated?" She said.

Peter nodded.

"I love you." May said.

"I love you too." Peter said, as May got into her car and drove off.

Peter clutched the corsage in one hand and his suitcase in the other. When he got to the door, he wondered why a wave of nervousness rushed through him, but he just ignored it and rang the doorbell.

It was MJ's Dad. When he saw Peter, he didn't say anything but just pulled Peter into a hug. Peter really wasn't expecting this and was slightly taken aback. Then MJ's Dad broke away.

"Peter..." Walter said, his voice calm and collected. "You look fantastic. How are you?"

"I'm alright, Mr. Jones." Peter smiled.

Walter let Peter inside.

"The _real_ party is in the backyard." Walter said. "But I'll let MJ show you that. She'll be down in a minute. Hope you've got all your stuff for afterwards?"

"Yeah, yeah." Peter replied, feeling anxious all of a sudden.

He hadn't really had time to see MJ these last few days. He called her everyday but the end of the semester was always such a busy time for him, and MJ understood that.

Peter took a seat at the dinner table, as Walter offered him a drink.

"No, thank you Mr. Jones." Peter said, adjusting his collar.

Walter put Peter's suitcase by the door and Peter clutched the corsage in his hand. He took a deep breath.

_Why am I so nervous?_ He thought.

He heard a door open and close upstairs, then the sound of heels - and he _knew_ it was MJ and his heart skipped a beat.

Then he saw her delicate olive hand fumble for the rail as she slowly made her way down the stairs.

Peter had never seen anything more beautiful in his life.

She was in a red, sleeveless satin dress, that cascaded down her long legs. It was a little shorter at the front than it was at the back and she was wearing red lip stick _and_ red heels as well.

Peter thought about how he had told MJ that he loved the color red on her, and he wondered if she had picked that color because he told her that.

His lips parted, and he stood up. He was aware he was staring at her because he couldn't quite believe his eyes. Her hair was straight, and fell down on her bare shoulders, and he could tell she was a bit nervous, which calmed his own nerves.

Peter knew MJ didn't really wear make up but he thought about how her make up complimented every stunning feature on her face - her perfect lips, her stunning cheekbones, her long eyelashes.

Peter shifted in his shoes a little bit.

"Wow, Wow, Wow." Walter said. "My baby's all grown up."

Peter smiled and when MJ was at the bottom of the stairs, he walked up to her and she threw his arms around him and he pulled her in tightly. He had literally been _dying_ to hold her close, and in that moment, he felt so happy that he could burst.

"You look....." Peter stammered, when he had broken the hug. "MJ...you look _perfect."_

MJ smiled, her hands still on Peter's shoulders. She blushed.

"Thanks." She said, aware her Dad was watching them. "You look amazing too."

She grabbed Peter's hand.

"Dad...we're gonna go...outside." MJ said, looking over at her Dad.

"Okay." Walter smiled, shoving his hands in his pockets. "Let me know if you need anything."

And with that, MJ lead Peter round the back of the stairs and through some sliding doors, to her garden.

When they were outside, Peter couldn't quite believe where he was again. There was a banner that said 'Winter Formal' on the back of the sliding doors. The garden had completely transformed - there was a beautiful table, with two plates set up with knives and forks, and a candle burning in the center.

There were fairy lights _everywhere._ On the roof, on the ground - everywhere Peter looked, at least. Peter didn't realize where the music was coming from but quickly realized that a few speakers had been set up.

"It's only simple." MJ said, turning to look at Peter.

"No...it's amazing." Peter said, looking back at her. "This is amazing."

He could feel his heart beating a little faster as he walked her over to the table, and pulled her chair out for her, before taking his seat opposite her.

"Is _this_ a date?" He asked her, aware that he was staring at her.

"Call it what you like, Parker." MJ said.

Peter looked down to see there was menu underneath his plate.

"No way." Peter chuckled, looking up at MJ.

" _Way."_ MJ said. "Do you wanna try the salmon tartare or the scallops with a Vietnamese herb sauce?"

"I really _don't_ know." Peter said, his eyes scanning the menu.

A waiter soon emerged from the sliding doors, dressed in black trousers, a white shirt and a black waistcoat.

Peter felt like he was in a movie.

"Any drinks for you, Mr Parker? And you, Miss Jones?" He asked.

"Do you have _any_ alcohol?" MJ laughed.

Peter watched her. He _loved_ her smile.

"My name is Sam - I have been told by Mr. Jones that you are allowed one glass of champagne each." The waiter smiled. "Anything else?"

"Maybe a lemonade?" Peter added.

"Yeah, what _he_ said." MJ replied.

"Right away." Sam said, before disappearing into the house again.

"Okay...your Dad hired a waiter." Peter said, his eyes widening. "I'm not surprised, but I'm impressed...oh I forgot, this is for you."

Peter handed MJ the corsage and she took it out of the box, wrapping the band around her wrist.

"Did May pick this out?" MJ asked.

"Yeah, she did...she said something really cute like you being pretty and delicate, like that rose." Peter muttered.

"Oh my gosh, stop Parker." MJ laughed, reaching out to punch Peter playfully.

Sam soon brought their drinks, and then their starters when they could finally decide on something to eat.

"This is _so_ much better than being at school." MJ hummed, as she put a scallop into her mouth. "Oh my God - foodgasm."

Peter had gone for the salmon tartare, which was _delicious_ , he thought.

"Try some." MJ said, poking her fork into another scallop and moving it close to Peter's mouth. Peter ate it off her fork with his mouth, then began to chew.

"Yeah, it's pretty damn good." He said.

MJ bit her lip.

"That was just my excuse to _feed_ you, Parker. Is it weird that I'm kind of turned on?" She said, before taking a sip of her champagne.

Peter swallowed now, watching her stare at him. He ran his hands through his hair.

"You don't have to say anything..." MJ whispered.

So Peter didn't, and listened to her talk about her last few days at school and how Mr. Davies had come over to talk to her Dad about her progress in his Physics, and how she kept thinking about how she always used to draw Mr Davies naked in her textbooks.

Then the main course came, and Peter was sure that it was the best food he had ever tasted.

"So, Sara and Oscar disappeared off the face of planet earth." MJ said.

Peter was surprised that she was comfortable bringing that up so casually.

"Yeah." Peter said. " _Weird."_

_"_ Anyways..." MJ sighed, flicking her hair being her shoulder as she ate. "I'm over it. I'm over _them._ I...didn't tell you too much about the ins and outs of the conversation I had with my Dad...but it got pretty weird - we started talking about sex and stuff."

Peter laughed.

"Same with me and May actually." he replied.

"Really? What did you talk about?" MJ asked, leaning in closer to Peter.

Peter thought about how this conversation was such an _MJ_ conversation to be having.

"Um...less about actual sex, and more about how I felt about it." Peter replied.

"How _did_ you feel about it?" MJ asked again.

"I don't know, MJ." Peter mumbled. "Good?"

"Well, my Dad and I were talking about contraception and stuff." MJ said casually, as she picked up her glass. "Cuz you know, I don't want to say that I was a _mistake,_ but...I wasn't _planned."_

"I don't think I was either." Peter said, as he swallowed.

They both laughed.

"So, I went in to see my doctor and I got this _thing_ shoved up my arm." MJ said, matter-of-factly.

Peter could feel himself chewing more slowly.

"A what?" He asked, confused.

"Just this _thing."_ MJ smiled, aware she wasn't being anymore specific. "Stops people from getting pregnant."

Peter wasn't sure _what_ to say to her. He didn't know whether to say 'cool' or just not say anything at all.

"I can't imagine your Dad talking to you about that." Peter said, putting down his fork and knife.

"It was _my_ decision." MJ replied, as Sam came outside to take away their plates.

Peter was staring at her again.

"Can we have more champagne?" MJ asked, turning around to Sam.

"I don't see why not." Sam whispered. "Just don't tell your father.

"I mean, I'm fine thanks - I'm driving later." Peter said.

"Yeah, I'll have his too." MJ said.

Sam just nodded and hurried out.

"I think you're scaring him." Peter laughed.

"Shut up." MJ laughed, as she finished off her lemonade. "I can't believe I _hated_ you when we were sophomores."

"We didn't hate each other." Peter replied. "I just...didn't _get_ you."

MJ looked up at Peter.

"Do you _get_ me now?" MJ asked.

Peter nodded.

"I think I do." He said. "I get everything about you now."

"Thanks." MJ said, her smile genuine. "I just thought...you know....you were just trying to be Liz's next boyfriend."

"Which I _was,_ I guess. I don't know...it was _stupid."_ Peter said, leaning back in his chair.

Sam came back out with their ice cream and more champagne for MJ.

Then Peter and MJ talked about Physics while they ate their desert, which was a bit weird, but something Peter didn't mind doing and loved that MJ cared about.

Then MJ stood up, and Peter got up to steady her a bit, because she knew she was slightly drunk.

"Thanks." MJ giggled.

Peter glanced over through the glass doors and saw Sam fiddling with a laptop, and 'I'm yours' by Jason Mraz began to play through the speakers.

"You wanna dance?" MJ asked, grabbing Peter's arms.

"Sure." Peter asked, putting his hands around MJ's waist. MJ put his hands on Peter's shoulders and he thought about just how beautiful she was up close.

MJ put her head on Peter's shoulder, as they moved from side to side slowly, and Peter held her tightly.

"Well, this is hella cute." MJ mumbled.

"Yeah." Peter replied, as he listened to the music play.

"I love this." MJ said, lifting her head off Peter's shoulder.

She looked into Peter's eyes and Peter thought about how he hadn't kissed her all night and how his mouth was aching to kiss hers.

Then MJ leaned into kiss him. And Peter kissed her back. And Peter felt _incredible._ MJ smiled, licking her lips.

They danced a little more, and soon, MJ's Dad knocked on the glass door, before sliding it open.

"I hate to interrupt, but do you guys wanna start heading over to the resort?" He said.

"Sure." Peter and MJ said, at exactly the same time.

"Thank you so much for dinner." Peter said to Walter.

"No problem..." Walter said.

They headed into the house and Walter had all the information they needed in a folder.

"You're so typical, Dad." MJ said, before hugging him.

Then Walter helped carry their stuff outside and load it into the car, putting his car keys in Peter's hands.

"Drive safe." He said to Peter, as Peter slipped into the driver's seat and Peter thought about how Walter was actually letting him drive the car.

"Bye, Dad." MJ said, giving Walter a quick kiss on the cheek, before getting into the car.

They drove off, and MJ brought out her phone, opening Google Maps up, so Peter knew where he was going.

"How far away is this place?" Peter asked.

"There's no traffic, so if we drive quickly, we should be there in an hour." MJ said, looking down at her phone.

Peter didn't mind that hour of MJ telling him directions and both of them getting distracted singing along to Cardi B, and MJ telling Peter that he was useless at directions, and MJ being slightly drunk.

They arrived, and it was definitely more quiet. Peter tried not to thing about how fancy and grand this whole place was as he parked the car, then wheeled his suitcase with MJ to the reception.

The receptionist smiled at them.

"Miss Jones and Mr. Parker?" She said, opening up her book in front of her.

"Yep." MJ said.

The receptionist handed MJ the keys.

"It's Penthouse 12. Take the elevator up to number 12. The room service number and WiFi passcode number is included in your suite. There is also some information on the relaxation and recreational facilities we offer." the woman said, handing Peter a book. "Let me know if you need anything else.

"Thanks." Peter said, looking over at MJ who seemed to be enjoying all of this. "We're good for now."

"Enjoy your stay."

Peter followed MJ into the elevator. He was conscious that he was still in his tux and MJ was still in her red dress.

"The first thing I'm doing is getting in that jacuzzi." MJ said, turning over to look at Peter. "Are you up for it?"

"Um...of _course_." Peter laughed.

They finally made it to floor number 12 and got out. The penthouse suite was at the end of the corridor, and when MJ unlocked the door, Peter had never seen anything like what he was seeing before.

"What. The...." Peter started, his voice trailing off.

It had _everything._ A fire. A view. A king sized bed. A plasma screen TV. A balcony, with a jacuzzi in it. The bathroom was the size of his whole apartment, Peter thought, as he walked around. The shower was the size of his whole room.

"I am shook." MJ said, as she looked over at the coffee machine. "And look...they bring food over from this little hatchet. How _dope_ is that?"

MJ took off her heels.

Peter walked up to her, still in awe. He really couldn't stand to just _look_ at her any longer.

"So...do you still wanna get in the jacuzzi?" Peter asked.

"Yeah." MJ said turning around so her back faced Peter. "Unzip me please."

Peter didn't know why his hands were shaking. He fumbled around for MJ's zip then zipped her dress down. She slipped out of it easily, to reveal her matching black underwear.

"Thanks." MJ said softly, as she turned around and helped Peter with his tie.

Peter inhaled sharply, as he slipped his jacket off. Her touch still sent an electric shock up his spine.

MJ then unbuttoned his shirt, as Peter took his shoes off, then pulled his trousers off from underneath his legs. Now they were both in their underwear.

"Come on." MJ giggled, excitedly, grabbing Peter's hands. She made her way across the room, unlocking a wooden door that led outside to the balcony.

There was the jacuzzi...and the most beautiful view of New York that Peter had ever seen.

"Wow." Peter said, exhaling, still holding on to MJ's hand. She was shivering.

Peter helped her into the jacuzzi and MJ sighed in relief, her hair colliding with the water and becoming curly again.

Peter watched her, freezing.

"Get in, Peter." MJ said. "It's _so_ nice."

So Peter did. And it _was_ 'so nice.' MJ's hair was now completely curly now and Peter thought about how much he loved her curly hair.

"You're staring at me, again." She smiled.

"Because you're so...fucking beautiful." Peter said, as he couldn't really believe _those_ words had escaped his mouth.

MJ's lips parted and she swallowed.

"I am?" She asked, turning to look at him.

"Yes. You _are._ " Peter said, moving close to her, and putting his arms around her waist.

MJ closed her eyes and leant in to kiss Peter, forcefully. He felt her tongue in his mouth and he smiled against her lips, his heart racing. Peter lifted MJ up unto him, and it was even easier in the water. She was so light in his arms.

She wrapped her legs around Peter's waist, looking down at him, before kissing him again. Her hands slid behind his neck and Peter's arms were firmly under her legs, holding her up.

When they broke away, they were both tired. Peter touched his head to MJ's, catching his breath.

"You're so...fucking beautiful." He repeated.

He watched her chest rise and fall, quickly. Her eyes were closed, and she still held on to Peter's neck. Then he let her down slowly, till she was standing on her feet. He sat down on the bench at the side of the hot tub, and MJ sat in between his legs, and they looked out unto the view for a minutes, and he kissed her check and her neck.

When they got back inside, Peter towelled MJ dry and MJ did the same for him. Then they brushed their teeth, got into their pajamas and both got into the bed.

Peter was already turned on, just looking at her. He lay on his back and MJ lay on her back too, next to him.

"Are you okay?" Peter asked, turning to face her.

"Yeah." She said, turning over and running her hands through his shirt and up down his chest. Peter gasped a little.

"How horny are you feeling now...on a scale of one to ten?" MJ asked Peter.

Peter swallowed.

"I don't know." He replied, laughing.

"Ok, I'll go first. I think, maybe...a nine point five." She said, as she climbed on top of him.

Peter grabbed unto her arms, steadying her.

"Are you still a little drunk, MJ?" Peter asked her.

MJ shook her head, leaning down over him.

"I just want you to fuck me, Peter...I guess." She whispered.

She kissed his lips then the side of his mouth, her breath quick, and she moaned softly against his lips. Peter put his hands around her back, then in her hair-

Then there was sharp knock on the door.

MJ climbed off Peter quickly, confused.

"What the fuck." She mouthed to Peter.

Then they heard it again. But louder.

"Who could it be?" Peter mouthed, getting out of bed slowly and walking up to the door.

MJ was still in the bed, turning over on her side to pull the covers over her and looking extremely confused.

"Should I open it?" Peter whispered, turning to MJ.

MJ didn't reply. So Peter just opened the door-

And saw the _last_ person that he wanted to see.

 


	18. Parker

Oscar had bags under his eyes and his hair was the messiest it had ever looked, but that wasn't the only thing that Peter noticed about him when he stood in his doorway.

It was probably one of the few times Peter had seen him _not_ wearing something designer of any kind. Oscar wore some sweats and a plain black T-shirt that oddly reflected his somber mood, Peter thought.

Peter didn't know what to feel, but for a split second, it felt like the walls were closing in on him. He just couldn't _believe_ that Oscar was standing there - for the past few days, it seemed like he had vanished from the universe and yet, there he was.

Everything that Peter had felt towards Oscar quickly came back, and he could feel his blood boiling.

_No one's going to believe you._

He could still hear Oscar's voice ringing in his head that day he had gone to confront him, behind MJ's back. He could still hear the sound of glass smashing against the fridge door.

Without even thinking, he stepped out of him and MJ's room, slamming the door behind him. He didn't want Oscar to _look_ at MJ...he didn't want him to go near her.

Oscar took a sharp intake of breath as if he was shocked by the sound of the door. Peter could now see that his eyes were slightly red and that he was paler than usual.

"What...the _fuck..._ are you doing here?" Peter asked, folding his arms. His voice was shaking slightly and he didn't know why.

Maybe it was because every inch of him wanted to slam Oscar against the wall.

Oscar opened his mouth as if he was about to say something, but then sighed and ran his hand through his hair nervously.

"Sorry?..." Peter asked, angrily. "Are you gonna say something? Or are you actually fucking speechless for once?"

The more Peter thought about what MJ had told him that night, the more infuriated he became. He couldn't get the same images out of his head. Oscar grabbing her. Oscar dragging her into that room. Oscar covering her mouth as she screamed.

"I..." Oscar stammered, looking up at Peter. "I need to talk...to MJ..."

His voice was hoarse, Peter thought, and it sounded like he was struggling to say every word that came out of his mouth.

"That is _never_ going to happen..." Peter said, behind gritted teeth. "Do you think she even wants to _talk_ to you?"

Oscar shook his head, tears stinging at the back of his eyes.

"I just need..." Oscar began again, quietly. "I just need to say a few things...to try and explain myself...because I feel like _shit_...and I wanna...apologize...."

Peter put a hand to his head. He couldn't believe what he was hearing. He didn't _want_ Oscar to apologize, because he didn't think he could ever forgive him.

"You need to leave..." Peter said. "Now."

"I-"

"You need to leave right now." Peter said again, raising his voice.

"Okay..." Oscar nodded, barely getting his words out. "I'm sorry I came...I'll just go..."

Oscar turned to go, and Peter nearly breathed a sigh of relief, but then the door behind him clicked open and MJ poked her head out of it.

Her hair was still slightly wet from being in the hot tub, and she was wearing a matching set of red pajamas that had a checkered pattern on them. Peter couldn't even focus on _that_ because he immediately realized how oddly calm she looked for having seen Oscar.

She looked at Peter then back at Oscar and then sighed.

"You can come in....and talk..." MJ said to Oscar, opening the door wider.

Peter felt like he was in an alternate universe.

"What?" Peter said, still angry. "MJ, are you sure?"

"It's okay Peter..." MJ shrugged. "Let him say what he has to say..."

"MJ-" Peter began.

"It's fine, Peter." MJ said, raising her voice now.

She looked up at Oscar, gesturing for him to come inside and Oscar nodded slowly, following her in.

"Thanks..." Oscar said, quietly.

Peter shut his eyes for a second, like he always did when he was thinking, and then opened them again.

His mind was calculating so many different thoughts at once. Why did MJ even want to listen to him? Why was Oscar suddenly so sorry? Where had he disappeared to all this time? What was he even doing _here_?

Reluctantly, Peter followed Oscar and MJ back inside, shutting the door behind him. MJ had already led Oscar to a seating area by the fireplace that was next to the balcony. MJ sat on a sofa and Oscar sat down on large armchair opposite her, playing with his hands and looking down at the floor.

Peter just stood there for a second, looking at them both. He still couldn't believe what was happening.

"Peter, sit down..." MJ said, tapping the space next to her.

Peter sighed heavily before taking a seat next to MJ. For some reason, he wanted to wrap his arms around her and pull her body close to his. It felt like he just wanted to shield her from everything and everyone.

MJ tucked a strand of her semi-wet hair behind her ear and looked up at Oscar again.

_How is she so calm?,_ Peter thought again.

"So..." MJ said, her voice measured and emotionless. "Why did you wanna talk?"

Oscar swallowed, before rubbing the back of his neck.

"I...." he stammered, again. "Sorry...I'm trying to think of where to start..."

Peter had never seen him so broken. He compared Oscar to May on the day Uncle Ben died, and how he came back from school, and had asked her what happened, and how she could barely speak.

MJ rested her head on her hand and just continued to look at Oscar. It was like she was just waiting for him to say anything.

"Well you better start talking soon..." Peter said, in a harsh tone.

"Stop." MJ said to Peter, turning her head sharply towards him and looking at him pleadingly.

Peter just rolled his eyes, before sinking back into the sofa. He decided that he wasn't going to say anything anymore. He just hoped that whatever Oscar had to say...it was pretty fucking good.

"Umm..." Oscar began, looking at MJ, his voice still hoarse. "I just wanted to come down here...and talk you...because you obviously deserve an apology...and I just wanted to explain...a few things..."

MJ just nodded. Oscar looked like he was on the brink of crying but looked like he was trying to fight back tears at the same time. Peter thought about how he'd never seen him cry before.

"There's no excuse...for what I did. And I should have never tried to deny it...so Peter...I'm sorry for that. I...I was just too embarrassed to admit it...I felt like there was just so much pressure on me from my mom..and my dad...and I know you guys think I'm a monster...which I _am_..."

"Have you told your parents?" MJ asked.

"Yeah..." Oscar replied. "I just told them both...this morning. We've been staying here for the past few days...because this is where we normally go before winter break begins...anyway I...I haven't been at school for the past couple days because after that day Peter came to my house...I just felt so consumed...with guilt...it's like I couldn't live with myself. Everytime your dad...or May called...my mom wouldn't pick up...she was still angry...from...anyway that doesn't matter..."

MJ nodded again, slowly. Peter realized then and there that he had never told MJ about how angry he'd got at Oscar and how that made May angry at _him._

"Obviously my mom freaked out at me...when she found out...she's still in denial...my dad..."

Oscar's voice trailed off and he shut his eyes for a second before opening them again. A tear escaped from his eye.

"I can't _believe_ I've given my dad...another reason to hate me..." Oscar said, his voice shaking. "My older brother, Axel...when he became addicted to codeine...my dad took all his anger out on _me_...because Axel was this perfect child and my dad blamed himself...for not stopping it...before it happened. Axel doesn't live with us anymore...we haven't heard from him in about a year. When I was fourteen...my dad started hitting me. Sometimes it would get out of hand...he would always hit me when Jada and mom weren't home...I had to put makeup on my arms and neck to hide my bruises when I went anywhere..."

Oscar sniffed, pushing some more hair out of his face. Peter looked at MJ and her face was riddled with concern.

"I was the perfect target...because I was too afraid to say anything..." Oscar continued. "I didn't want my family to fall apart...I was just trying to keep it together. I became busy with trying to do my best at school. All throughout high school...I would study hard to get perfect grades...I wanted to show my dad...that I was worthy of his love...and that was _so_ stupid. Because no matter how hard I tried, I knew deep down that he would never love me. He couldn't even _pretend_ to love me..."

Peter's heart began to beat faster again.

"If I talked back at him...he would hit me. If I even _indicated_ to mom that I was hurt...he would hit me again when she wasn't there. He would make me say I fell....God, I can't even remember how many times I told people I fell. It was all so...toxic. He would buy me all these nice clothes and give me and Jada all these nice things to hide the fact...that he was a horrible person..."

Oscar's voice choked up and he put a hand over his mouth, before sighing.

"One day...when I was sixteen...I wrote everything that had happened to me on a piece of paper...and I put it in under my mom's pillow...it sounds so stupid now...my dad found it before my mom could. He ripped it up, and threw it away...then he hit me again...that was the last day he hit me...it was in the morning before I went to school...I felt like I couldn't breathe...I was throwing up blood in the bathroom after first period..."

Peter looked at MJ again. There were tears stinging at the back of her eyes, but she still looked pretty calm.

"I've never...told my mom about it...or Jada...." Oscar sighed. "My dad and I...we just argue about everything now. He doesn't even have _time_ to take his anger out on me anymore...he's always travelling to work in different cities. I don't know if he's sorry about what he used to do...it's like he just wants me to forget about the whole thing and move on...but I can't forget about it."

Peter sat up now. He remembered Oscar mentioning his Dad to him and Ned before but he didn't know that it was anywhere _near_ this bad.

"I'm sorry, MJ..." Oscar said. "There's still no excuse...I guess I was just angry...I wanted someone to feel pain...the way I did all those years. I wanted to feel in control over someone...the way my dad had controlled me my whole life. Something just came over me...I felt like I had the right to manipulate other people. After the night of Liz's party, I paid Brian to stay quiet. I encouraged Andrew to get to know you, so that no one would suspect anything...I spread those _stupid_ rumors about you...I convinced my parents that I needed to be homeschooled for a while...just so I could stay out of trouble. I knew you wouldn't want to tell people what happened...but all that changed when you became closer to Peter. I just kept trying to hurt other people to make myself feel better...and that's not a way to live, so..."

MJ nodded again.

"I'm not expecting you to forgive me...I just wanted to let you know..." Oscar said.

Peter couldn't believe all of that had just come out of his mouth. MJ had her fingers at the sides of her temple, like she was struggling to process all the information.

"Okay..." MJ said, before sighing. "It's...hard for me...to decide anything right now....or even _look_ at you-"

"I understand." Oscar said, his lips quivering.

He looked down, furiously picking at his fingers.

"I appreciate that you came to talk to me, and apologize." MJ said. "And what you did is hard for me to forgive...I don't know if I'm ready to do that right now."

Oscar nodded again, swallowing, wiping away his tears with the back of his hand, like he was angry at himself for even crying.

"Oscar...you need to talk to your mom, and explain everything." MJ continued, leaning forward now. "I know you're... _afraid..._ that it's gonna break your family apart...but she deserves to know the truth."

"Yeah..." Oscar said. "I will..."

"I hope..." MJ said. "That you figure everything out."

"Thanks." Oscar said. "I'm...I'm gonna go now. I don't think I'll be seeing you guys in school anymore. My mom's...gonna talk to your dad and I think he'll decide what to do...about me..."

"Okay..." MJ said again, standing up now. Oscar stood up too.

Peter just watched as she led him to the door. He didn't know what was worse. The fact that MJ was talking to him as if he was just another one of her friends, or the fact that he could barely process everything that Oscar had just said.

"Bye...MJ..." Oscar said, stepping out of the door.

"Bye..." MJ replied.

"Bye, Parker..." Oscar said quietly to Peter, his face remorseful.

Peter didn't reply. It was the first time Oscar had not said _Parker_ mockingly, but it still made him angry for some reason. He couldn't tell if MJ had forgiven Oscar or not, but he was _certain_ that he would never be able to.

MJ shut the door behind Oscar, and then looked at Peter.

"Well...I wasn't expecting that..." MJ said, going to sit at the edge of the bed.

Peter didn't even know what to say.

He just climbed back into bed, not saying anything. His head still hurt, and he was still so confused.

MJ sighed, before turning off the lights and climbing in beside him.

There was a silence as Peter stared up sat the ceiling and MJ went on her phone for a bit.

Peter wasn't sure if he felt sorry for Oscar. All he could think about was MJ's face when she told him what happened to her, and how upset the whole thing had made her. Maybe it was better, Peter thought, when Oscar had vanished. Maybe everything would be better now if he just disappeared forever.

The light from MJ's phone went off and Peter heard her put it down on her bedside table again.

"Peter?..." MJ said, softly.

"Yeah?" Peter replied.

MJ turned over and put her head on Peter's chest, reaching over to touch his hair.

It was like a reflex - Peter had to wrap his arms around her. He pulled her close to him. He just wanted them both to go to sleep and forget they had ever had that whole encounter with Oscar.

"Why are you upset?" MJ asked.

"I'm not." Peter said.

"I _know_ you are, Peter."

The truth was that...he was. He was mad at Oscar for even coming. He was mad that MJ was hurt in the first place. He was mad that Oscar felt like MJ could just take pity on him now, and he couldn't help it, but he was slightly mad at MJ for being so nice to Oscar.

"I just had to talk to him...you know?" MJ said. "It's weird...but I kinda feel better about the whole thing now."

Peter didn't reply again. He still didn't know what to say.

_That's great MJ. I'm happy for you._

Those words couldn't seem to leave his mouth.

MJ kissed Peter's cheek, and he turned to kiss her lips quickly.

She put her arms around his neck and kissed him again, then broke away for a second.

"You good?" she said to Peter, looking right at him.

"Yeah..." Peter said, running a hand through her hair. He couldn't ignore how _numb_ he was feeling.

MJ ran her hands up Peter's arm and touched his shoulder.

"Do you wanna finish what we started...or no?" She asked.

Peter couldn't even _think_ about having sex right now. His mind was elsewhere.

"I'm...tired..." Peter replied.

"Okay..." MJ said, a blank expression on her face. She kissed his cheek quickly before putting her head back on his chest. "Goodnight."

Peter wasn't tired at all. In fact, MJ was probably more tired than him, because she fell asleep quite quickly and Peter just held her.

As he felt her breathe softly against him, he thought about how empty he felt. It was like all this time, he was _searching_ for MJ's love through trying to find out what happened to her, and now it was all over, he didn't know how to feel about it. She felt safe when she was with him, and that had made Peter happy, but now she was almost back to her normal self, he felt useless.

He couldn't be her guardian angel anymore because she didn't need him to fight her battles for her behind her back. He no longer had to shield her from the world because she was on the journey to finding closure - and she was doing it all by herself.

He hated that he even thought about it, but maybe he wasn't in love with MJ, Peter thought. Maybe he was just in love with the idea of fighting for her.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


The breakfast that Peter and MJ had the next morning beat the breakfast that Sophia had made at MJ's house. By a long shot.

They got to order what they wanted from a menu beforehand, and all the food arrived through a hatch in a little basket minutes afterwards.

MJ had gotten a wide selection of fruit, some Cheerios, smoked salmon, and some 'pain au chocolat'. Peter had ordered similar to her, and had also gotten this avocado and egg sandwich that he thought tasted _amazing._

They were eating their food on a table on the balcony, and were wearing a matching set of onesies that the resort had provided for them, which had kept them both very warm.

The topic of Oscar hadn't come up once, which Peter was kind of grateful for. He was happy that he was alone with MJ, in front of an amazing view, but something still didn't sit right with him.

He still couldn't stop thinking about the 'conclusion' he had kind of come to last night. He _wanted_ to love MJ so badly, but he was struggling to understand what his purpose in her life was anymore.

He'd been sort of quiet that morning and just let MJ talk to him. He was really struggling to start up a conversation, because he felt like his mind was clouded with so many thoughts, and he couldn't register much.

He let MJ tell him that she was strongly considering going to Chicago to see her mom, and that she actually kind of missed her. He let her show him old pictures of her and her mom when she little, and he had commented how cute she was as a child. MJ FaceTimed her Dad, but again, Peter didn't say much, and it was MJ who updated him on everything they had done so far. Walter didn't bring up the topic of Oscar which Peter, again, was very grateful for.

"So I was looking at the school that your mom told me about..." Walter said, through the phone. "It's called Hillside Prep, and it's not too far from Midtown, so you'll still be able to see Peter..."

_MJ's moving schools?_ Peter thought.

This was something that she had never mentioned to him, but to be honest, he saw it coming - there was no place for MJ at Midtown, and they both knew it.

"The all-girls one?" MJ said, biting into her watermelon slice.

"I think you'll actually really like it..." Walter said. "They've got a great science department and I know you really love Physics and Biology. Their pre-med work experience is ranked fourth in the US. It's gonna be a fresh start for you...what do you think Peter?"

Peter was barely listening until now.

"Yeah, yeah...it sounds great..." Peter said, trying not to sound disappointed.

"Do I have to wear a uniform?" MJ asked, squinting as she looked at her phone camera.

"Kind of...they have a lot of restrictions on what types of shirts you can wear and all that." Walter said, laughing a little. "But I'm glad about that...it'll make you take less time to get ready..."

"Dang it..." MJ said, smiling. "No more showing up to school looking trashy..."

"Just _think_ about it..." Walter said.

"I will dad, don't worry..." MJ said.

"Okay babygirl, I'll talk to you later. You two enjoy your time over there..."

"Bye Dad..." MJ said, waving and turning the camera towards Peter. Peter said bye as well.

"Are you really okay with me going, Peter?" MJ said, turning to look at him.

"I'll miss you..." Peter said. "But it's your decision...I guess..."

Peter's heart sank. He didn't think he could sit in that Physics class without MJ. He didn't think he could walk past her empty locker, and accept that she wasn't there.

This entire day was taking a turn for the worse for him emotionally, Peter thought. Not only did he already feel extremely disconnected from MJ, she was now spending the entirety of Winter Break in another city, _and_ moving schools.

After breakfast, Peter and MJ talked about how they were going to spend the rest of their day, and finally decided to go ice skating. There was an ice rink just behind the hotel, so they both got ready, bundling themselves up in scarves and coats.

On the way to the rink, Peter held MJ's hand.

_She looks so beautiful,_ Peter thought.

MJ's hair was in a cute half up - half down style and she was wearing a long black coat and a red scarf, along with the fake glasses that May had given her. Peter was wearing Uncle Ben's old coat and his Dad's old scarf and he thought about how they probably looked like a young May and Ben from the eighties.

The ice rink was semi-crowded, mostly with couples and families with young children. They paid to skate for an hour and after putting on their skates, Peter got unto the rink first, MJ looking nervously back at him.

"Come on..." Peter said, reaching out his hand to her.

"I've only been skating like twice." MJ said smiling, looking down at the ice.

Peter wanted to laugh but he couldn't really find it in him. That _empty_ feeling came back strongly, overwhelming all his thoughts and emotions.

"You'll be okay...I'll hold your hand." Peter said.

MJ looked up at him. He couldn't tell if she was wondering if he was okay or not, but she grabbed his hand and Peter pulled her unto the ice.

"Shit...shit." MJ shouted, nearly falling over. Peter was holding her at arm's length.

"Relax..." He said, his heart beating out of his chest for no reason.

"Oh my god...." MJ said, steadying herself and breaking into laughter. "Wait, we have to go slowly.

She skated closer to Peter slowly, still holding unto his hand.

"Come on, Parker. Let's skate...since you're _so good_ at it." She said.

So Peter skated. Their first skate round the rink mainly just consisted of MJ screaming. She nearly fell about five times but Peter always steadied her, grabbing her waist, and pulling her into him.

On the second lap, MJ got the hang of it. They still moved super slowly, much to annoyance of some committed skaters around him. He only talked to her to ask her if she was okay and she would always nod and smile back at him.

He couldn't help feeling like he was trying to fall in love with her all over again.

After their second lap, MJ looked like she was exhausted. She reached her hands out to the bar at the side of the rink, leaning over it.

"Maybe you should do one or two rounds by yourself." She said, turning round to Peter. "Then you can skate really fast."

"Are you sure?" Peter asked, effortlessly putting his hands in the pocket of his jeans, whilst still being able to stay upright.

"Yeah." MJ said, smiling back at him.

That smile that made Peter's heart ache.

"Okay..." Peter said.

Again, he wanted to go up to her and kiss her quickly but he couldn't bring himself to. He skated backwards for a bit, then turned around and began to accelerate down the rink. He didn't even turn to see if MJ was still looking at him, though he really wanted to.

He swallowed, his vision blurring slightly. But he bent his knees now, gaining speed. He passed MJ once, and caught a glimpse of her face. That half-happy, half-concerned look. But he just kept on skating. He felt his knees starting to ache, as he did a little bit more than just one or two rounds. He was pretty sure he had covered the whole rink six or seven times, by the time he came to a stop.

MJ had already left the rink. She had taken off her skates, and gotten back into her Nike's, and was behind the bar, still looking at Peter.

"Sorry, I took so long. I just got a bit overexcited." Peter said, out of breath.

"It's okay." MJ replied, reaching into her pocket to check the time on her phone. "Do you wanna go grab a snack then head back?"

"Sure." Peter said, as he got off the rink and began to take off his skates.

They got some churros from a food stand outside the rink. MJ took one bite, and immediately started humming to herself.

"I swear, all I've eaten is crap these last few weeks." She said, looking up at Peter as they walked back home.

Peter was on her left, making sure that he was paying attention to the traffic in front of him. He didn't say anything back to her and he kind of hated himself for it. He imagined that she had pictured their ice skating trip as a little more romantic.

"Do you not like them?" MJ asked, looking down at Peter's box of churros, slightly confused that Peter was being unresponsive.

"No, they're good." Peter simply said.

He didn't _look_ at MJ so he didn't get to see her face and judge how she was feeling. They just continued walking and eating. She didn't say anything else to him and he didn't say anything else to her. Even when MJ grabbed their empty churro boxes and dumped them in a bin on the street - she was silent.

In the elevator, MJ took out her phone. Peter guessed that she was texting her Dad. She continued to text as they got into the suite and Peter shut the door behind them. MJ sat down on the bed, and Peter sat down next to her, feeling slightly guilty now.

When she was done, she placed her phone on the bed and looked at Peter.

"I think I'm gonna go." She said. "To Hillside."

Peter nodded, taking off his jacket.

"I know you'll do great there." Peter said, as he felt his heart sinking a little bit.

"Are you just saying that?" MJ said, before biting her lip.

She put her arms around Peter's neck.

"No. I mean it." Peter said. "You'll do amazing."

MJ smiled a bit, touching her forehead to his quickly. He smelt the lavender in her hair again and he thought about how he would smell the lavender in her hair, less now. How he wouldn't get to catch her in school or watch her whilst she looked bored in class.

He felt helpless.

"Thanks." MJ said, smiling again. Peter smiled a little, but he kind of felt like he was going to break into two.

She sat up and then leaned in to kiss him, slowly, her hand reaching out to touch his lap. MJ didn't seem to mind that Peter didn't kiss her back. She just broke away, before running a hand through her hair.

"I think we should get in our swimsuits and then take a bubble bath. I mean, that bath is _huge._ " MJ said. "Sounds good?"

"Yeah." Peter replied.

MJ didn't waste time. She walked over to her suitcase, then began fishing for her swimsuit. Peter got up and turned around, grabbing his trunks from his suitcase. By the time he had zipped up his suitcase and turned around, MJ was already in her bright yellow bikini.

"I'm gonna go run the bath." She said, disappearing off into the bathroom.

Peter sighed, as he began to change. He heard the sound of the water running and when he entered the bathroom, he _still_ couldn't quite believe how big the bath was.

MJ was kneeling down beside the tap, putting all sorts into the bath, till it began to bubble up. She reached in to check the temperature then climbed inside.

"It's _so_ nice." She sighed, closing her eyes and sinking into the bath, as Peter walked up to her. Her hair was now wet with bits of soap and Peter couldn't help staring at her.

He walked over to the other side of the bath, getting in carefully.

It _was_ so nice, like the hot tub the day before. And she was so _beautiful_ and Peter really wanted to scream because he just didn't know why he was feeling so low. He wanted to enjoy this moment with her, now that he was so close to her, but he couldn't bring himself to _feel_ anything.

He looked over at her, swallowing and she looked back at him. This time the expression on her face was riddled with hurt and confusion.

"Peter, what's going on?" She asked him.

Peter shook his head.

"Nothing." He muttered.

"Well, it's clearly _something._ " MJ replied.

Peter closed his eyes, laying his head against the bath.

"Are you gonna...say anything?" MJ asked. "Is this about me moving schools?"

For once, he just wished she wouldn't say anything at all. Mainly because he knew he didn't know what to say back to her.

"It's not about that, MJ..." Peter sighed, his eyes still closed.

He saw Oscar's face, as he sat opposite them this morning, crying. Then he saw MJ's face again, as she stared back at Oscar, emotionless.

His head was spinning.

"Then what _is_ it about?" MJ asked again, her voice firm.

Peter sank deeper into the bath, closing his eyes now.

"MJ, I don't _know._ " Peter said, blankly.

And he was right. He didn't really know what he felt and why.

"Do you even _like_ being here?" He heard MJ say.

"I do." Peter said, realizing he sounded more tense than he had anticipated, his eyes still closed.

"Well, you've got a funny way of showing it, Parker."

At that moment, Peter's blood began to boil all of a sudden. It had never annoyed him when MJ called him Parker, but there and then, all he could think about was Oscar calling him Parker. He thought about all the times he had been called 'Parker' by bullies like Flash and Brian. And then he thought about Uncle Ben...and his Mom and Dad, and how they had left him in this broken world...with that _name_.

And he hated every thing about it.

"Don't call me that." Peter said, impulsively, and his heart began to race, as he realized what he had just said.

What he had just said to _MJ._

His eyes opened, and he sat up a little bit, so his head was clearly above the surface of the water. He saw her sit up, her curly hair drenched. Then she leaned forward, tilting her head slightly.

"Peter...what the _fuck_ is wrong with you?" MJ said now, her voice stern.

Peter instantly felt remorseful.

"I'm sorry." He gulped. "MJ-"

"You _clearly_ have a problem with...with me. And I don't know what the _fuck_ it is but you need to sort it out." MJ said, looking Peter dead in the eyes. "You know, if this is about Oscar...if you're really mad because I had a conversation with him...then grow the _fuck_ up. I'm just trying to be mature about it...and so should you."

Peter was hurt now. He _was_ mature. All he had been doing since Uncle Ben died was being mature.

"Gee, thanks, MJ." Peter said, sarcastically, shaking his head slightly. "I really love being called immature-"

"Well, you _are_ Peter." MJ said, interrupting him and running a hand through her hair. "You need to stop acting like a thirteen year old. Stop being so _selfish..._ it's not all about you."

Peter looked away for a second, before swallowing.

"All about me, MJ? Are you serious?" He said to her. "Do you even realize how much _shit_ I've taken...for you? MJ, all I've been doing for _weeks_ is trying to protect you-"

"Well, I don't need you to protect me." MJ said, looking as if she might cry now. "God, I've fucking protected myself since I was thirteen years old and my mom left me....you've been through shit, but so have _I_ Peter. Maybe that's something you still don't know about me, but I'm not _weak._ I've been through all of it...when my Dad neglected me...when he didn't speak to me for a fucking year after mom left...he told me it was my fault. Don't you _ever_ treat me like I'm weak, because I'm not. I've always protected myself. And I definitely don't need you to protect me now."

Peter was stunned. He didn't think she had _ever_ talked to him like that. MJ was still looking at him, tears frozen in her eyes.

"I only tried to protect you because I cared about you." Peter said, realizing he had just said 'cared' in the past tense.

MJ shook her head, a tear trickling down her cheek now.

"You didn't think about me, Peter." She said. "When you fucked Maya-"

_I did think about you._ Peter thought. _All I could think about was you._

"That has nothing to do with it." Peter started, frustrated.

"Maybe, it does...a little bit." MJ sniffed. "Have you ever thought about how...you were kind of my first? And I wasn't yours. If you cared about me...if you really thought I wasn't okay....you would never have done that."

MJ looked away now. Peter's heart was breaking.

"MJ, please stop..." he whispered now. "Stop crying..."

He knew that her face right now was all he would be able to think about for weeks.

"And you think I don't know? About Liz...and the club...because I do. Because Liz told everyone...and I never brought it up because I didn't really care...but it made it _harder_ to open up to you...and if you _cared..._ you wouldn't have let her do that..." MJ said, shaking slightly now.

Peter put a hand to his head. He'd never regretted anything more now. He felt a sharp, burning sensation in his throat.

"I just feel so fucking... _drained."_ Peter gulped, barely able to focus.

MJ was crying a lot now, furiously wiping tears from her cheek.

"Well, that's how I've felt for a month, Peter..." she mumbled, as she cried. " _Everybody_ hates me at school...therapy isn't even _working..."_

Peter felt tears sting in his eyes.

"I _need_ to forgive him, Peter." MJ whispered. "I have to do it for me...and so you can stop worrying, and have your life back. I'm sorry I made it so hard for you..."

MJ was grabbing at the skin on her arm now.

"I'm sorry I'm such a...fucking...burden." She said, swallowing.

"You're _not._ " Peter said, shaking his head.

"I _am."_ MJ sighed, inhaling sharply from time to time. "And everyone hates me, _because_ I'm a burden...I'm not like every other girl, Peter...I'm _difficult._..I wanted you...from the beginning...way before you even wanted me. I just thought you'd never understand. I thought you _hated_ me too. You were never really a loser like me...you had Ned...who's your best friend. You had your aunt who genuinely loves you, Peter. She's obsessed with you...no one's ever been obsessed with me..."

Peter felt a tear run down his cheek. He was annoyed at himself that he was crying.

"After what happened...I swear...I thought I could never be with anyone again...I felt so alone. Having sex for the first time after everything that happened... _scared me._ But with you...everything was okay. I felt...safe. And I know I'm _weird_ and stand-offish...but all of this is so fucking strange...because...no one's ever really _loved_ me before...not like you have, Peter."

She looked up at him and Peter wanted to rewind time and take back all his words. At that moment, he wanted nothing more than to wrap his arms around her. But he knew she would never let him.

MJ looked down now, closing her eyes, trying to breathe, as Peter felt more tears escape his eyes.

He didn't know what to say to her. To make her feel better.

"I'm sorry..." he kept on whispering, helplessly.

He'd genuinely never seen her so upset. And it hurt a thousand times more than he could have ever imagined.

"I just want to be alone." MJ said, sighing heavily.

She stood up slowly, not even looking at him and got out of the bath, grabbing a towel to dry herself off. Then she opened the bathroom door, walked out then closed it gently behind her.

Peter lay there, tears falling rapidly down his face. He lay back down till the only thing visible out of the water was his face.

The hardest thing he had ever had to do was watch her as she confessed all those things to him. As she poured her heart and soul out.

_Drowning would have been easier,_ he thought.

 


	19. Stay Sober

Ned put down a massive box of decorations on the kitchen table.

"We better get to it, Peter." He smiled, opening up the box.

Peter smiled too. He enjoyed spending time with Ned, and they always decorated Ned's Christmas tree together because his parents were never home.

Peter was glad that Ned had invited him over. They had done some of their holiday homework together and played some video games. He'd been trying to do everything to forget about what happened last weekend.

Peter and MJ had been nothing but civil to each other the morning after MJ had said those things to him. They spent their last day at the cinema, then at the arcade - they didn't touch each other, they didn't hold hands. He didn't kiss her once.

He just let her have her space.

They spent their last night on opposite sides of the bed. Peter remembered MJ saying goodnight to him and him saying goodnight back, but nothing else.

He drove them back down to her house, and handed her over to her Dad. Walter had smiled and asked them how their weekend was and Peter had nodded and smiled, and said it was amazing.

Even though he was pretty sure he had finally fucked everything up for good.

He promised Walter that he'd be back later that week to help MJ pack the last of things and drive her to the airport.

She really _was_ going to spend three weeks in Chicago with her Mom. And she really _was_ moving to school two hours away from him.

"The invitation is open to you, Peter." Walter had said to him. "If you want to go..."

"That's okay, Mr. Jones." Peter had said. "She deserves to spend time with her Mom alone."

He remembered seeing MJ looking up at her Dad then back at Peter. That hurt, expressionless look that always made Peter feel horrible. She didn't say anything else to him before Walter closed the door.

And that was it.

He hadn't seen MJ since. It was like everyone had forgotten about Oscar - _he_ just seemed to have disappeared.

Peter had gotten a job at Mr. Delmar's store, trying to re-pay May back for all the trouble he had caused her. Uncle Dave had come over to their apartment a few times to make sure they were okay, and Peter _knew_ he was giving May money.

He spent his evenings in Ned's house, playing video games and eating junk food.

And through it all, he could never stop thinking of MJ. How much he _missed_ her and how much he wanted to say to her. They hadn't called or texted each other once.

He had told May about what happened, but not enough for her to be _too_ worried about him.

And he still hadn't told Ned _anything._

And now it was the day before MJ was leaving. It was late in the evening and Peter knew he had to go back to her house because he couldn't break his promise.

"Dude, are you feeling okay?" Ned asked, as he began to play some Christmas music on his phone.

Peter nodded, before swallowing, then grabbing a decoration from the box.

"Ned...I've gotta tell you something." Peter sighed.

"Shoot." Ned said, before smiling. Peter liked how Ned always wore comic book store T-shirts, and how he was always ready to listen to Peter.

"Um...." Peter stammered, before biting his lip.

He didn't know where to even start.

"Oscar's not...who you think he is." He said, walking up to put the decoration on the tree.

"What do you mean?" Ned asked, a confused expression on his face. Ned pushed up his glasses and proceeded to pick up some fairy lights.

"I mean, he _is_ who we think he is." Peter said, correcting himself. "He just...did something...really dumb."

Ned sighed.

"Peter, you're horrible at telling stories." Ned said, starting to untangle the lights on the kitchen table. "You know that, right?"

"He did something bad to MJ." Peter said, finally forcing his words out.

He looked up at Ned, who stopped in his tracks, his eyes widening.

" _What?"_ Ned replied. "Wait...he...it was Oscar?"

"That's what I thought too-"

"Dude, how do you know-"

"Because MJ _told_ me." Peter said, his words firm. "She told me everything."

Peter walked back to the box again. This time he grabbed two or three decorations. He suddenly felt better that he had finally let that off his chest.

"Wow...." Ned said, shaking his head slowly. "That's why he....I mean, he hasn't replied to any of my texts...where is he?"

"On holiday - somewhere. I mean, he apologized...to MJ. But he's got a really fucked up relationship with his parents...so I don't know what they're going to do to him." Peter sighed.

Ned didn't say anything for a while. They decorated the tree for a little longer. Peter decided to just focus on the task ahead. He hummed to some Christmas music, helping Ned untangle the lights.

"Peter, are _you_ okay?" Ned finally asked.

"Me?" Peter said, feeling tense all of a sudden. "Yeah, I'm okay, Ned. Why wouldn't I be?"

"I mean...she's your _girlfriend."_ Ned replied. "And Oscar was your _friend._ And now she's  leaving town for a couple of weeks and moving schools...so are you okay?"

Peter continued to fumble with the lights and Ned grabbed Peter's arm.

"I don't know." Peter muttered, looking back at Ned.

Ned pulled Peter into a hug and it was strange, because Peter was _sure_ he hadn't hugged Ned in forever.

"It's gonna be okay, Peter. I promise." Ned said, before breaking away. "She's gonna be okay."

Peter didn't realize those were the exact words he wanted Ned to say, till after Ned had said them.

"Thanks, Ned." Peter said, patting him on the shoulder.

And then they finally untangled the lights together, and placed them carefully on the tree, before putting the rest of the decorations on.

"Wait for it..." Ned said, running over to the socket by the wall. He plugged in the fairy lights then turned the plug on, and the tree lit up.

"Nice..." Peter smiled, bringing out his phone to take a picture.

Him and Ned did their handshake, and then Peter laughed a little because he thought about how childish the whole thing was.

"Only _cool_ people have handshakes..." Ned said to Peter, grabbing his car keys from the table.

"Yeah...." Peter laughed, but he didn't sound entirely convinced.

Then Peter's phone buzzed. It was May:

_'At MJ's house with Walter. You should come over.'_

Peter wondered what May was doing at MJ's house. His thoughts were interrupted when Ned stared speaking again.

"So, I gotta go pick my Mom up from work." Ned said. "You want me to drop you off at your place?"

"Um, actually, no Ned...can you take me over to MJ's?" He asked.

"Yeah, sure." Ned replied.

Peter draped his bag around his shoulder. He could feel his heart beating in his chest as Ned drove him to MJ's house, and before he knew it, they had pulled up on her driveway.

Peter got out, as Ned rolled down the window.

"I'll see you soon." Peter said to Ned, bumping fists with him.

He turned around, as he felt Ned reverse out of the driveway, then walked up to the door. Suddenly, Peter felt extremely underdressed in his sweats and black Midtown High school jumper.

_Stop being stupid_ he thought, as he rang the doorbell.

He was welcomed by Walter's familiar smile. He was dressed in a business suit and Peter could smell his strong cologne.

"Peter!" Walter exclaimed. "Come in, come in."

Peter stepped through the door. He looked to the right and saw Aunt May. She was sat on the couch in a light blue dress, her coat draped round her shoulders. Her eyes lit up for a second.

"Hey...May..." Peter mumbled, slightly confused.

"Hi, Peter." May said, patting the spot on the couch next to her.

Peter walked up and sat down next to May. May put a hand in his curls, before kissing his forehead.

"Your Aunt and I were just talking about you." Walter said, as he closed the door. "She was telling me about your studies and your new job. I guess it's for best that you _didn't_ choose to go to Chicago."

Peter simply smiled, as Walter sat down next to him. He couldn't believe he was sitting in between May and MJ's Dad - and he couldn't help wondering where MJ was.

"MJ's gone to go pick up some of her uniform for her new school." Walter said. "Just some blazers and skirts - she should be back in a few minutes. At least she'll finally start looking smart."

"That's teenagers for you." May laughed, glancing over at Walter.

_This is kinda weird_ Peter thought.

"Your Aunt has an impressive resumé." Walter said to Peter.

May blushed.

"She could be of good use to a few colleagues of mine - they need a marketing director...I don't want to give too much away." Walter continued. "I'm taking May to an interview this evening."

"An interview?" Peter asked, turning to look at May.

"Yes, Peter." May said, putting her arm around Peter's shoulders.

"And I have a very strong feeling she'll get the job." Walter said, reaching over for his glass of water that was on the table in front of him.

"That's amazing." Peter said, turning to May.

May smiled back at Peter. Just at that moment, the doorbell rang and Peter's heart skipped a beat.

"That will be the one and only Michelle." Walter said, putting his glass back down and standing up.

May tightened her grip around Peter. He had always found it weird how she knew when he was anxious. And he _was._ It felt like he hadn't seen MJ in forever.

He heard the door open and Peter couldn't help turning around. Walter pulled MJ into his arms. She was holding a big bag of clothes in one hand.

Her hair was tied back in a low ponytail, except for a piece that she had left out at the front, and she was wearing a cute red sweater and blue jeans.

"Hey May." MJ said, as she broke away from her Dad. "Hi Peter."

Her voice sounded soft.

"Hey." May and Peter chorused. They both stood up now.

"I better get going with May." Walter said to MJ. "Did you get everything you need?"

"Yes, Dad. I'm good." MJ said, handing Walter's credit card back to him.

"You're sure, Michelle?" Walter asked again.

"I'm sure, Dad." MJ said, impatiently. "I'm _sure_ and I'm _MJ..._ if you don't mind."

Walter put her hand behind MJ's back and kissed her on the cheek quickly.

MJ sighed.

She looked over at Peter and Peter swallowed, shoving his hands in his pockets.

"We'll be back in a few hours." Walter said, grabbing his coat from behind the door. "Peter, will you make sure she finishes packing? Her flight is early tomorrow morning -"

" _Dad."_ MJ said now. "Just...go..."

May gave Walter a look that said 'just leave them alone' and Walter sighed, before opening the door and stepping out.

"We'll see you two later." May said, smiling.

Peter thought May looked beautiful in her white heels and thought about how he liked her hair scraped up into a bun. Then the door closed.

And it was just Peter and MJ, Peter standing by the couch and MJ clutching the bag in her hands, one foot in front of the other.

"How've you been?" Peter asked, his throat starting to hurt all of a sudden.

"Good." MJ replied.

She tucked a strand of hair behind her ears.

"Peter - you don't have to stay and help me if you don't want to...if you have plans..." she said.

"Are you kidding?" Peter chuckled. "It's the last time I'll see you till the new year."

MJ nodded and Peter walked up to her, tentatively.

"Whats in the bag?" He asked, smiling a little.

MJ reached in and pulled out a black blazer. The words 'Hillside' were engraved on the front pocket.

"Then there's this..." MJ said, handing Peter the blazer as she pulled out a black skirt.

"So badly dressed MJ is gone?" Peter laughed.

MJ Just smiled, stuffing everything into the bag again.

"Isn't she still very much a part of me?" MJ replied.

Peter shrugged, playing with his fingers.

"Come on...I've gotta start packing." MJ said, turning around and walking towards the stairs.

"You haven't _started?_ " Peter gasped.

"No, I haven't started." MJ laughed. "Why do you guys think packing is such a big deal? It'll barely take an hour."

Peter followed MJ up to her room. It was as neat as ever, but Peter was sure that was due to Sophia, and not to MJ.

MJ grabbed her suitcase from underneath her bed and opened it up. They were standing near opposite sides of the bed.

"Is it cold in Chicago?" She asked, checking her phone.

"Very." Peter replied, looking at her.

She seemed so relaxed. He hadn't seen her that carefree in a long time.

MJ walked over to her wardrobe and pulled out a few sweaters.

"Could you fold these in for me?" She asked, walking over and dumping a pile of clothes on her bed.

"Sure." Peter said.

He couldn't help his heart aching a little bit as he picked up each of her clothes, folding them carefully. He pictured her wearing each one of them, some he had seen her wear to school, some he hadn't. Then she brought over a handful of her jeans, leggings and sweatshirts.

MJ was sitting cross-legged now by one of her closets, picking out some boots and trainers.

"Have you ever been to Chicago before?" Peter asked her, as he sat down on her bed and continued to fold her clothes.

"Yeah...when I was a baby." MJ replied, reaching in to grab one of her shoes. "But not since then."

"And you...haven't seen your Mom since..."

"Since she left. Since I was thirteen." MJ replied, looking over at Peter briefly.

Peter nodded.

He looked over at the photo of MJ and her Mom on MJ's desk. MJ looked about eight, and she was on her Mom's back. MJ's Mom was beautiful, just like her, with short, blonde hair and bright blue eyes.

"I'm kind of excited to see her." MJ said. " _Really_ nervous. But excited, nonetheless. I spoke to her on the phone this week..."

"What did she say?" Peter asked, aware that he was staring at her, yet again.

MJ continued to pick out her shoes.

"She said she couldn't wait to see me." MJ said. "I hope she actually means that. Obviously, I have a _lot_ of questions to ask her. But I think I'll ask her them in person."

She stood up now, bringing her shoes over and dumping them in the suitcase, before beginning to arrange them. She was looking down, a concentrated expression on her face.

Peter looked up at her.

"Of course she means it, MJ." He said.

They're hands brushed together a little as he put her clothes in her suitcase, and she tried to arrange her shoes.

MJ went over to her drawer, scooping up a handful of her bras and underwear and putting it in the suitcase.

Peter carried on folding the clothes.

"Would you like a bra, Peter? To remember me by?" MJ laughed, throwing one at him.

Peter just chuckled, shaking his head a little.

"My Dad is acting like I'm going to _war_." MJ said, tucking things into the sides of her suitcase. "So you might as well take one in case I never come back."

"You're going to be back, MJ." Peter sighed.

He didn't see her face at that moment, because he was still looking at the pile of clothes in front of him. He found one of his shirts in the pile and hesitated for a bit, before picking it up and beginning to fold it.

It was the shirt that he had given her that night she had come over and told him everything.

"You don't want it back?" MJ asked, as Peter put it in her suitcase.

"No, it's fine, you can keep it." Peter smiled.

MJ sighed, walking over to her bathroom to grab her toiletries, then coming back to sit right next to Peter. She reached over and put some things on her desk inside.

Peter's mouth was dry. He had so much to say to her but he didn't know where to start.

"MJ?" He finally said, as he had folded the last of her clothes in her suitcase. "Can we talk?"

MJ zipped up a bag of toiletries and then handed it to Peter, who put it in the suitcase.

"Sure." She said, before swallowing.

Peter took a deep breath as MJ sat down on the bed next to him.

"I'm sorry." He said. "I'm sorry about what happened with Liz. I'm sorry about being overprotective. I'm sorry that I ruined our weekend because I was being...a dick."

MJ's lips parted slightly as she looked in his eyes.

"The truth is..." Peter said. "I didn't think I could forgive Oscar, but I realize it's not _my_ place to do that - it's yours...and I didn't understand that before. I guess I couldn't understand how you could forgive someone who would hurt you the way he did. And it made me angry. But, I was just being an idiot, because you forgive _me_ all the time. You still took me home that night when I told you that...that you _deserved_ what was happening to you. You know, Oscar said something to me once when I was talking to him...that I was just as shitty of a person as he was. And at the time, I _thought_ it was bullshit - but, I realize that I've kind of been a shitty person to you...so genuinely, MJ...I'm _sorry._ "

Peter felt like a massive weight had been lifted off his chest. He looked at her desperately, waiting for her to say something.

MJ reached out to touch Peter's arm quickly.

"You're nothing like him, Peter. And you _haven't_ been a shitty person." She said. "If anything, I've just been...a _bitch._ "

Peter shook his head.

"These past few days...have been...kind of _awful._ " He said. "Without you. And I guess I thought giving you space was the best thing to do...but now you're leaving tomorrow...and I realize I should have been here...with you."

MJ moved a little bit closer to Peter.

"I just don't know what I'll do without you." He whispered.

MJ wrapped her arms around Peter, her chin on his shoulder.

"I'm gonna miss you so much, too." She said, closing her eyes.

Peter put his hands on her back. He hadn't held her this close in so long, and he realized just how much he'd missed it.

"I'll call you _everyday_." MJ said, her voice cracking up. "I'm gonna harass you, and bug you so much, that you'll be sick of me."

Peter was closing his eyes too, smiling a little bit now.

"And I don't hate it when you call me Parker." He said.

"I know you don't." MJ said back.

When she broke away from him, there were tears in her eyes.

"Hey...save the tears for tomorrow?" Peter smiled, running his hands through her hair. "We've still got a few hours together."

MJ nodded, blinking and wiping her eyes quickly.

"Yeah..." she sighed. "Am I...forgetting anything?"

"You haven't packed socks. Or any of your jewelry...or makeup." Peter said, as MJ stood up.

"Yes...shit..." she said, laughing a little and making her way to her dresser.

She pulled out some socks and threw them at Peter who caught them and put them in her suitcase.

MJ talked about her mom a little bit more as she packed. She told Peter how her mom had a British boyfriend called Oliver, who she'd never met before but was super good looking for his age.

"My Dad says he'll put me on the first plane back if I hate it." MJ said, as she placed a box of her make up in the suitcase. "But I don't think I will."

"I think you'll love it. Chicago's a really cool place, MJ." Peter said. His head was on her pillow now, and he was just lying down, watching her pack.

They talked and packed for what seemed like forever. It definitely took a lot more than an _hour_ , as MJ had suggested.

MJ finally put her laptop and a couple of her books in the suitcase, before zipping it up, and lifting it to stand it upright. She picked it up.

"That's actually not _that_ heavy..." she said, pushing her hair out of her face, before laying down next to Peter.

He turned over and looked at her and he thought about how he was so happy that she was happy.

"What do you wanna do?" MJ asked him, turning to look at him.

"I don't mind." Peter gulped.

"Not helpful, Parker." MJ replied.

She laughed a little.

"Do you wanna...get drunk...together?" She asked him.

_Together_ Peter thought, just as he realized that they'd never really _both_ been drunk.

"I don't know..." Peter muttered, sitting up. "Don't you want to stay sober before you leave?"

"The more I lay here and think about leaving you, the more I just want to cry...so maybe, a little alcohol wouldn't be so bad." MJ said, looking up at Peter.

She looked so beautiful in her red sweater and with her hair sprawled on her pillow, Peter thought.

He grabbed her hand and their fingers interlocked.

"A little alcohol wouldn't be _so_ bad." He repeated.

MJ sat up then kissed Peter's cheek quickly.

"I'm gonna make you the _best_ gin and tonic that you've ever had." She said, as she stood up.

MJ disappeared downstairs to the kitchen, and Peter picked up the bra that she had thrown at him. He sighed, as he picked up his bag at the side of his bed and put the bra inside it.

Maybe he would thank himself for it later, he thought.

MJ came back with two glasses filled with ice, and a bottle of wine, gin, and tonic water in her arms. She closed the door with her foot, and Peter helped her by taking the glasses.

"Thanks." She said, as they set down everything in the carpet in her room.

"I really hope my Dad doesn't lose his shit." MJ said, as she sat down cross-legged on the carpet. "Though he knows I raid that liquor cabinet on the regular."

Peter laughed a little, sitting down opposite MJ, before running his hands through his hair.

"Let's begin." MJ said, picking up the bottle of gin and opening it. Peter held up his glass and MJ filled up a quarter of it, then she did the same for her glass.

"You're sure that isn't too much?" Peter asked her.

"No, Peter...that's like nothing." MJ said, opening the tonic water now, and filling both glasses up. She picked up her glass. "Cheers?"

"Cheers." Peter said, before drinking.

He watched as MJ drank nearly half the glass, scrunching up her face afterwards.

"Fuck, that's strong." She said, licking her lips.

She shifted a little so her back was resting on her bed, and so did Peter.

There was a short silence, as they both drank, and stared at each other. Then MJ opened her mouth to say something.

"Peter...do you... _remember_ your Mom?" MJ asked, swirling the liquid in her glass around.

"A little bit." Peter sighed. "I mean, I remember what she looked like...from photos-"

"What _did_ she look like?" MJ said.

Peter took another sip of his gin and tonic. He closed his eyes, as he tried to remember his Mom.

"Um...she had...long brown hair..." Peter said. "But it was really light - and curly. And she had brown eyes...."

"And your Dad?" Peter heard MJ ask.

"He had brown hair too...though, thicker than Mom's...and he was _really_ tall...and his eyes were a bluey-green..." Peter gulped. "His hair was a little curly too. And he had May's smile...and he sometimes wore reading glasses..."

His eyes were still closed, pictures moving behind his eyelids.

"And he used to read me stories...at night." Peter said, as he finished what was in his glass. He felt MJ's hands in his curls and her lips on his cheek. "And my Mom was _beautiful..._ and she was a good singer, I _think._ She sang all the time...May used to sing the songs she would sing after she died."

"What was the last thing she said to you?" He heard MJ say.

"I love you." Peter said now, his heart racing. "She told me she loved me and that she'd see me soon."

He opened his eyes and MJ had grabbed his hand. Peter swallowed. Those memories felt so fresh yet so distant at the same time.

"Peter?" MJ said softly, looking at him right in the eyes.

"Yeah?" Peter replied, squeezing her hand.

"I love _you_..." MJ smiled, a tear rolling down her cheek.

"What?" Peter said, quietly. He didn't think he was hearing her correctly.

"Life's too short to not let people know you love them...I love you _so_ much, Peter..." MJ said, her voice steady.

Peter's heart skipped a beat.

"I love you too, MJ..." he said, smiling.

He set down his drink before wrapping his arms around MJ and kissing her tear-stained cheek quickly.

Peter couldn't believe she had just said that, and all of a sudden, he felt _right_ again. He felt something he hadn't felt since before she told him what happened to her.

And he was sure she loved him.

"I'm sorry I made you say all that." MJ muttered. I just wanted to know-"

"It's okay." Peter said, his hands still locked in hers. "Can I kiss you now?"

MJ put a hand behind Peter's neck and then her lips to his. And Peter thought about just how much he'd missed this feeling, as he kissed her back, slowly.

It felt like they were kissing forever.

MJ broke away, before giggling.

"My heart is racing." She said, out of breath.

"Was that the kiss or the alcohol?" Peter smiled.

"Maybe a bit of both." She said, reaching for the bottle of wine. "And the fact that you just told me you loved me again...is the room spinning yet, Parker?"

"No. Not yet." Peter replied, focusing on her fingers as she opened the bottle.

"Then we have work to do." MJ said, as she nearly filled their glasses with white wine.

Peter didn't hesitate before drinking this time. He downed the whole glass, and so did MJ.

"Fuck." They both said, at exactly the same time, before bursting into laughter.

That didn't stop MJ making them both another gin and tonic.

"This is kinda fun." Peter said, still laughing a little.

"I _told_ you." MJ said.

"You didn't tell me anything." Peter said, as he took another sip. "I think the room _is_ spinning a little."

"Same." MJ said, finishing her glass.

She set it down before laying down, her back on the carpet. Peter was sure she was a little bit drunk now.

He looked down at her, as he sipped his drink.

"So are we gonna have goodbye sex or what?" MJ said, putting a hand to her head.

" _Maybe."_ Peter said, sliding his hand up her top and running his fingers across her stomach. He still loved the feeling of her skin. "Is that drunk MJ talking?"

"No, it's _confident_ MJ talking." She laughed.

"Let's...talk first..." Peter said, his words awkwardly spaced out from what he had been drinking.

He looked back down at MJ and her eyes widened.

"We can talk while you're screwing me..." MJ said. "It's called...multitasking."

"It's not the same..." Peter laughed, and MJ started laughing a little too.

Peter finished off his drink and lay down next to her, kicking off his shoes. He was now feeling extremely light headed.

He thought about when they had first laid down next to each other, in the park.

"At least I never have to see Flash's stupid face ever again. Or listen to Liz talk about calories." MJ smiled.

"Lucky you." Peter whispered.

The ceiling seemed so much further away than it actually was.

"And oh my god...fucking...Annabel and her being up Mr. Davies' ass in Physics." MJ said.

"She's the fucking _worst."_ Peter laughed. "I think she's always trying to get guys to look at her boobs...I just want to tell her to put them away."

MJ was laughing now, clutching her stomach.

"Those low ass v-neck tops." she said. "I swear she has one in every _color-"_

"I feel mean." Peter sighed, but he was still smiling.

"You're drunk, Peter, you're allowed to say what you want." MJ replied, turning her body towards him. "Go _on..."_

"I don't know what to say." Peter said, placing his hands on his chest.

"Tell me a funny story." MJ said, running her hand down Peter's arm.

"Like _what?"_

"Any...thing." MJ replied, her words slow now.

" _Okay_." Peter said, trying to access some of his thoughts. "When I was in middle school, I really liked this girl...her name was...Tina?"

"Tina." MJ laughed.

"Shhh...." Peter laughed, turning towards MJ now.

"So I wrote her a love letter, or whatever. Because May _thought_ it would be a good idea..." Peter sighed. "So I slipped it in her English notebook...which she handed in to the teacher, of course...and then a few days later, our teacher had marked our English homework -"

"You're such an idiot, Parker." MJ said.

"She said she was impressed by what Tina had written, so she read it out to the class..." Peter smiled. "I think I was so embarrassed, that I peed my pants."

MJ laughed again. He loved hearing her laugh.

"I love hearing you laugh." He said out loud, playing with the gold necklace around her neck, and he quickly realized he would _never_ had said that if he wasn't drunk.

"My laugh is _terrible."_ MJ said, putting one hand in Peter's hair, again.

"No, it's _dorky_. It's cute." Peter said.

"What else do you love about me?" MJ said, clearly enjoying herself.

"Your smile..." Peter said, as everything around MJ seemed to blur. "And your hair...it reminds me of Mom's hair..."

Peter laughed a little. He could feel the alcohol, numbing him a little bit, making him feel more relaxed.

"I like _your_ hair." MJ said. "And when you _blush..._ and how you're really strong, but you're always so...gentle with me. And the way you randomly always ask me if I'm okay...and...your _abs."_

Peter smiled.

"And the way you frown when you're trying to concentrate in class...and how fast you write when you're doing math...and how you always run your hand up and down my back before I fall asleep...and the way you say 'shut up' when I make fun of you..."

Her voice trailed off and Peter sat up a little, leaning in to kiss her, which felt like an impossible task, because they both kept laughing for no reason.

Peter lay back down and MJ sat up this time, taking off her red sweater, and she was in her bra now.

"I stole one of your bras." Peter said.

"That's okay." MJ replied, putting her knees either side of Peter legs.

She held his face between her fingers as she leant down to kiss him. He reached up to hold her wrists, his eyes closing.

"Well, don't fall asleep on me, Parker." MJ said.

"Your hands are cold..." Peter said, slightly out of breath.

"I know..." MJ said. "But I _told_ you that I'd pay you back...so take your Midtown merch off."

Peter sat up and pulled his sweatshirt over his head before laying back down.

"I can't believe that you were wearing Midtown merch, Parker." MJ said, leaning over him again, her voice slow and steady.

Peter felt her hair on the sides of his cheek.

She kissed him again, swirling her tongue in his mouth, as Peter's hands moved behind her back.

Peter broke away after a while. He was out of breath and he was pretty sure that he could feel his heart beating in his head. MJ moved off Peter now, slowly standing up.

"Be careful..." Peter said, as he watched her.

"I'm good...I'm good." MJ said. "Woah...I am _drunk-"_

"Yeah, I can tell." Peter said, grabbing her legs to steady her.

MJ unbuttoned her jeans, pulling them off her legs. Her underwear matched her bra, Peter noticed...a baby pink color.

Then MJ grabbed Peter's hands, helping him to his feet. They were still laughing and both nearly falling over.

"Please don't kick any bottles around..." Peter said to MJ, as he began to pull down his sweats.

"Nice underwear, Parker." MJ said.

Peter looked down at his boxers and realized that they were dinosaur patterned.

"It was a secret Santa thing...Flash got me them." Peter said.

"Okay, okay..." MJ giggled, putting her arms on Peter's shoulders. "So...can I give you a hand job?"

"Only if you _want_ to." Peter said, sitting down on the edge of her bed.

MJ sat down next to him, running her hand across his shoulder. Peter was turned on just from her _touch_ and looking down at her body. He thought again how pink was a nice colour on her honey-toned skin.

"Stop being so polite, Parker." She said, after kissing him quickly. "Just say... _yes, MJ. And it better be a fucking good one_..."

"Yeah, okay, that's like the _last_ thing I would say." Peter said.

MJ just smiled. She grabbed some of her lotion and a tissue box from the desk beside her bed. Peter couldn't concentrate on what she was doing.

It was just that _smile._ That smile that made Peter just want to freeze the moment.

"Ready?" MJ said, as her fingers moved to the rim of Peter's underwear.

"Yes, MJ. And it better be a fucking good one." He laughed.

He closed his eyes as he heard her laugh too, and felt her cold but delicate fingers slide underneath his shorts. He gasped a little, and he thought about how _different_ this was to when Liz had touched him in the club. The fact that it was MJ made it that more pleasurable.

He felt his heart racing and the room spinning, as he put a hand behind MJ's neck and kissed her lips.

MJ continued and Peter broke away, opening his eyes and realizing that she was watching him intently, her big brown eyes staring at him.

His eyes closed again. He felt her hands pull on his skin and he felt so relaxed, _certain_ that he was close to orgasming.

And he _did_ after a while. He moaned gently, and all he could think about was MJ, and how she _wanted_ to do that for him. With the release he felt like he was out of breath, and then MJ moved her hand away.

"Was that good enough for you, Parker?" he heard her say.

Was she still looking at him like that? Peter thought. Was she wiping her hands?

"Yeah...yeah it was..." Peter stammered, panting. " _Fuck..."_

As the room started to spin more violently, he couldn't quite make her out.

"Thanks..." Peter added, laying his head down on one of her pillows. "I think I'm _officially_ drunk..."

He could just about make out the rise and fall of her chest, and her tucking her hair behind her ears.

"What if I don't remember how this _feels_ like?" He asked her. "Tomorrow morning. And then you'll be gone."

"You will." MJ said, placing her hand on Peter's chest.

"Just..." Peter mumbled, his eyes shutting and opening ever so often. "Don't find any other guys in Chicago-"

"I _won't._ " MJ whispered. "I promise."

She leaned over, and kissed him on the lips. Peter put his hands on her back and unclipped her bra strap, slowly pulling it down her arms.

"Can you still _see_ me?" He asked her, as he felt her lips on his neck.

"Yeah, just about." MJ said.

"Well, I can just about see _you."_ He said, placing her bra carefully next to him.

MJ slid her underwear off quickly before climbing unto the bed and Peter pulled her unto him, sitting up to kiss her.

He kissed her like he wouldn't kiss her for a while. He ran his hands up and down her back continuously and he felt MJ pull his underwear down his knees and down his legs.

"Do we need a condom..." Peter said, as his voice trailed off.

MJ shook her head and then just tapped her arm, and Peter knew what she meant and he didn't say anything else.

"You _want_ to?" He asked.

MJ nodded, a sort of serious expression on her face, and Peter tried to focus.

He had become accustomed to asking her this, even though he knew the answer was always yes.

Peter lay back down on the bed, getting underneath the covers, and MJ got under them too, climbing on top of him again. He felt her hair caress the sides of his face again as she tried to steady herself.

"Hold on a second..." MJ said, smiling.

Peter thought again about how he just couldn't _concentrate_ and wondered if she could as well.

"Are you okay?" Peter said, touching her arm.

"Yeah..." MJ said softly, looking into his eyes.

He thought about how beautiful she was and how lucky _he_ was.

MJ kept mumbling and assuring Peter that she knew what she was doing, and after a bit of effort, he was inside her.

This time, Peter watched her.

He watched her because he wasn't going to watch her for a while. He listened to her gasp, and watched her moan, and he kissed her back when she kissed him, and he laughed a little after she laughed.

As MJ moved against him, he supported her with his hand. The room was spinning, but _she_ wasn't. He sat up a little, kissing her, muttering in between each kiss.

"I won't remember this." He kept on saying.

"You will." MJ kept on saying back, and it comforted him for a while, as she carried on.

She was controlling the pace, and Peter was glad, because he couldn't even think straight and wasn't sure if he was even in control of his own body.

"Peter..." MJ mumbled. "It's weird...it feels like I'm not even _here_ right now..."

"MJ...it's because...you're drunk..." Peter replied.

MJ nearly lost her grip of the sheets, but Peter quickly grabbed her hands. She gasped again softly.

"Shit...sorry..." MJ whispered, as Peter told her it was okay.

Peter was _still_ watching her. He watched the way she would loose focus and slow down, but then sigh and then go faster. He watched the intense expression on her face.

He heard her moans get louder, and this time he didn't tell her to be quiet because there was no one else in the house. He felt sweat begin to build up on his forehead, and watched her closely. Her body seemed to glisten under the light.

He watched as _she_ orgasmed, and gasped finally, her breath extremely quick. She paused for a bit, then climbed off Peter.

"I don't think I can _go."_ She panted, shaking her head.

"Huh?" Peter replied, reaching out to touch her shoulder. There was something about having drunk sex that made him ten times more tired.

MJ reached for her covers pulling them over her, and Peter did too, slowly realizing what she was trying to say.

"I can't leave you." MJ said, laying down next to Peter. "And what if she's _changed..._ my Mom...what if she's not who I want her to be-"

"Shhh..." Peter said. "MJ, it's okay. You're gonna see your Mom, and she'll love you just the same. Everything's going to be fine..."

He pulled her body close to his, resting his chin on her head, feeling her chest rise and fall against him.

"No, it's not." MJ said, her voice cracking up.

"Yes, it _is._ " Peter said, his eyes closing. "I _promise_ you...just go to sleep..."

Peter felt her arm reach across his chest and her fingers on his shoulder. She gripped unto him tightly, her breath slowing down.

This was hard for him _too._ It was so fucking hard, he thought.

But Peter had to be strong for _her._

"Shh..." Peter whispered gently. "Go to sleep..."

And soon enough.....she did.  
  
  
  
  
  


Peter woke up to the sound of MJ showering. He checked his phone, before rubbing his eyes.

4:50am.

His clothes had been folded neatly on the edge of the bed. Everything looked washed and ironed.

_Had Sophia been in here?_ He thought.

The lights were off but he couldn't make out any of the bottles lying on the carpet, where they had left them.

Peter tried to remember what had happened last night. He knew he'd been extremely drunk and that he'd had sex.

That was about it.

Then the sad, reality of that morning dawned upon him.

He was going to have to say goodbye.

To the person he'd fallen head over heels for.

To MJ.

 


	20. Try

Peter put a hand to his head, pulling MJ's covers over him a little bit and feeling shivery all over.

He was definitely hungover.

He could _still_ hear the sound of MJ showering. The lights were off, so he reached over and turned on the lamp on her bedside table, squinting at the light as he lit it up.

His grabbed his phone and stared down at it. There were several text messages from May - one had just been sent three minutes ago:

' _Stayed over here last night. I'm in the guest room. Come see me when you wake up. X'_

 _Here?_ Peter thought, confused. _May stayed over here at Walter's house after her interview?_

Peter put down the phone again, looking up to see MJ's white robe hanging at the side of her closet, ignoring the clean and neatly folded clothes on the bed.

He reached for it and put it on, slowly standing up to his feet, before tying it around himself.

Then he made his way towards the door, opening it, and making his way into the dark corridor. There was some light coming from the living room downstairs so Peter managed to find his way to the guest room.

He felt slightly off balance, and his vision was slightly blurry but he was relieved when he pushed the door open, and saw May sat cross- legged on the bed, in her pajamas, texting on her phone.

"Peter..." May whispered, pushing her glasses up her nose, before patting the spot on the bed next to her.

Peter rubbed his eyes then slowly made his way to the side of the bed that May was on before sitting down on it.

"How was the interview?" Peter croaked.

"Honey, you sound _exhausted._ " May said, sitting up and pushing her hands slowly through his hair.

Peter winced a little bit. His body was aching.

"Peter, are you hungover?" May whispered. "Were you and MJ drinking?"

Peter _wanted_ to lie to her but he couldn't bring himself to it. And he'd promised May that there would be no more lying, or secrets.

"It was kind of our last night together...in a while..." Peter mumbled.

May frowned slightly, dropping her hands to rest on his shoulders.

"Peter, you're _underage._ You can't be getting hungover..." May sighed.

Peter sighed too. He opened and closed his eyes again.

"And is this...MJ's robe?" May asked, looking Peter up and down.

Peter looked down at himself, like he'd almost forgotten that he'd put it on.

"Yeah..." he muttered.

"Are you _naked_ , Peter?" May said, touching her fingers to his cheek quickly.

"May, May...." Peter said suddenly, squinting again. "Your hands are cold."

"I'll pretend you answered my question..." she said, letting go of Peter now. "I don't care, as long as you guys are being safe."

Peter bit his lip.

 _What do you want me to say?_ He thought.

"Why are _you_ here?" He asked May, trying to change the subject.

"Because the interview was over dinner...and it finished extremely late. I met some of Walter's colleagues and they were _lovely..._ we had a good time - I _hope_ I get the job." May said all at once, smiling a little. "Walter bought me some pajamas...and we also had a long conversation when we got home...about MJ....and Oscar...Sara called-"

"Wait, hold on." Peter said, trying to process all this information. "He _bought_ you pajamas?"

"Well, Sophia went out to buy them last night." May replied. "Anyway, that's _not_ the point, Peter. Sara called, and I'm finally going to talk to her over lunch this afternoon. About all that happened...about _Oscar-"_

"Is he coming back to Midtown?" Peter said, playing with his fingers.

"Peter, I don't have all the details yet - she just said she wanted to _talk._ But I don't think so."

"Well, Oscar's going through a lot." Peter replied, not quite believing those words were coming out of his mouth. "His Dad is a _horrible_ person...he... _hit_ him-"

"I know, honey." May sighed, nodding. "Sara told me everything."

 _So Oscar opened up to his Mom,_ Peter thought.

"Anyways..." May said. "You should start getting ready if you're still gonna go to the airport with MJ. Walter got you a toothbrush that's in the bathroom...it's the _blue_ one _.._.then for God's sake put some clothes on, Peter-"

"May, I'm okay. I got it." Peter said, standing up now and making his way to the bathroom.

He stopped in his tracks, turning around slightly.

"May?" Peter said, as May looked up at him again. "Is there something...between you and Wal-"

"Peter, no! _No."_ May laughed, shaking her head. "We're just acquaintances. I would _never_ go there."

"I said the same thing about MJ." Peter replied, smiling a bit, before opening the door to the bathroom and shutting it behind him.

As Peter brushed his teeth, he could barely keep his eyes open. And he also couldn't stop thinking about MJ. He thought back to last night, and how it was officially the best night he'd ever spent with her.

He remembered her telling him things she loved about him...her _touching_ him...them both making out till he was exhausted...them having sex...MJ panicking about her Mom...

Peter spat out some toothpaste into the sink, before opening the tap. His heart had begun to race a little bit again.

He didn't _want_ to say goodbye to her. He didn't want her to go away and come back, only to go to her new school, hours away from him, and probably move downtown.

But he _wanted_ her to be with her Mom. He longed for her to have a relationship like he did with May.

Peter opened the door to the bathroom again.

"I'm gonna go...get ready...in MJ's room." Peter said to May, realizing how weird it all sounded.

"Okay." May said, nodding slowly. "I should probably get ready too. Sophia-"

"Washed and ironed all my clothes." Peter said, finishing her sentence. "Yeah, I saw them...see you in a bit."

He stepped out of the guest room hurriedly, closing the door behind him.

On his way back to MJ's room, Peter saw Sophia, her blonde hair in an extremely high ponytail, holding a basket of laundry in her hand.

"Morning, Peter." She said. "Sleep well?"

"Yeah." Peter said, all too quickly.

He thought about MJ doing her 'sex detector' impression, the first night he had stayed at her house, and he wanted to burst out laughing.

"Good." Sophia replied. "Well, let me know if you need anything. You're our guest."

And then she turned around and made her way down the corridor.

Peter exhaled. He finally made his way to MJ's room, knocking on the door softly.

"Come in." He heard.

It was definitely MJ's soft yet nonchalant tone. He pushed the door open to see her lying down on her bed, in her matching white bra and underwear. Her hair was wet, and the whole room smelt of lavender.

"You don't have to knock, Parker." MJ laughed, sitting up a little.

Peter just smiled, closing the door behind him.

He walked over and climbed on the bed, lying down next to her.

"You gave up with getting ready?" Peter asked, turning his head over to her.

Her hair was at its curliest, the way Peter liked it.

Her eyes were tired, Peter thought, as he watched her stare up at the ceiling.

"I guess." MJ sighed. "Sophia woke me up _way_ too early-"

"I'm sure she found us both passed out last night." Peter said. "And with all that _alcohol."_

MJ laughed a little.

"And then she told me your Aunt was here." MJ said, turning her head to look at Peter now. "Why am I not surprised?"

"Well, May just told me she's not into your Dad." Peter said, looking into MJ's eyes. "Don't worry."

"I wasn't worrying." MJ said. "They can do whatever the fuck they want, right?"

"Right." Peter replied.

"You look good in my robe." She said, biting her lip. "Thanks for stealing it."

"You're welcome." Peter said.

Then they just looked at each other for a bit.

MJ's legs seem to go on forever, Peter thought.

"How's the hangover?" Peter asked, reaching over to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear.

"I have a big ass headache." MJ said, sitting up, slowly. "I need some Advil."

"Headaches and planes are _not_ the way to go." Peter said, sitting up too.

"Also, my neck _hurts."_ MJ sighed, putting a hand on her shoulder.

Peter reached over to put his hands on her neck, putting her hair out of the way first.

"I'm no masseuse." Peter said. "But I'll do my best."

He dug his fingers into her skin, and MJ closed her eyes, wincing at first, but then relaxing.

"Thanks." She said, as she inhaled and exhaled.

Peter watched her, and his heart sank a little bit, as he realized just how much he _loved_ her and just how much he'd _miss_ her too.

After a few minutes, Peter let go of MJ, and she opened her eyes now.

"It's so much better." She sighed, before putting her back up against the headboard. "You should re-think your whole career path."

Peter chuckled.

He couldn't take his eyes off her.

"You're always staring at me, Parker." MJ smiled, turning over and putting her hand round his neck.

"Well, who's gonna stare at you when you're in Chicago?" Peter said, putting his hand on her lap.

MJ looked at him in a way that suggested she couldn't believe that he'd said the last word.

"I hate you." She sighed, before putting her lips to his.

Peter kissed her back almost instantly. He couldn't tell her that he didn't want her to leave. That they had joked about it, but now, the more he thought about it, he couldn't possibly _live_ without her for that long.

Peter broke the kiss, his hands sliding down to her waist.

"What are you thinking about, Peter?" MJ whispered, her brown eyes looking straight into his.

Peter just shook his head a little.

"Nothing." He said, as he kissed her again.

He felt her fingers at the back of his neck and he moved his fingers so they were in her hair. MJ broke away to catch her breath, then Peter grabbed her legs and pulled them against him so she sat on his lap, then continued to kiss her, his breath quickening now.

MJ ran her hands down Peter's neck, shrugging the top of her robe down his shoulders, till he was bare chested.

"We're going to have to do this _fast_..." MJ said.

Peter's heart was racing. He didn't _want_ to rush anything with her. He slid his hands behind her back, leaning over her, and laying her down on the bed, till her back collided  softly with her sheets, and he was on top of her.

He kissed her neck, and MJ moaned softly, because she was tired.

"MJ..." Peter whispered. "Are you sure you want to-"

"No one's going to do this for me...for a long time." MJ said, her eyes desperate.

"You'll be back before you know it." Peter said. "You just need to-"

"Peter, please stop talking." MJ said, sighing heavily. "Just...."

Peter reached down to touch her underwear, then he heard the sound of the door opening, and he climbed off of her so fast, that he nearly fell off the bed.

MJ sat up abruptly, turning her head around, her lips parting.

Walter's face poked round the door.

"Dad!" MJ shouted. "What the _hell,_ do you even _knock_ anymore-"

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry." Walter said, moving his head back behind the door. "I just...do you guys want breakfast?"

"Just go _away!"_ MJ shouted, leaning over to grab a pillow from the top of her bed and throwing it at the door.

"MJ, you're about to go away for three weeks." Walter chuckled. "I just wanted to see my baby-"

"Well...your ' _baby'_ is pissed off." MJ groaned. "So leave -"

"You really need to get downstairs. In fact, you need to beat this New York traffic...so you're leaving in twenty minutes." Walter said.

"Ugh..." MJ groaned again, grabbing her shirt from the end of the bed and beginning to put it on. "I can't _wait_ to get to Mom's house. I bet she _knocks-"_

 _"_ Twenty minutes, Michelle." Walter said, his voice firm now, before closing the door.

MJ closed her eyes now, taking deep breaths. He couldn't tell what she was thinking, but he now knew that he needed to get ready.

Peter didn't know why something about what had just happened was suddenly extremely funny to him. He couldn't decide if it was the fact that MJ's dad had nearly caught them trying to have sex or the fact that MJ was now putting a hand to her head and swearing under her breath.

Peter lay back down against the sheets and started laughing...realizing that this would probably be the most light hearted he would feel for the rest of the day.

"Peter..." MJ sighed heavily, clearly frustrated.

Peter continued to laugh, tears starting to comes out of his eyes.

"You're so freakin annoying..." MJ said, reaching over to take her neatly ironed sweater from her bedside table and putting it on.

"That _made_ my day..." Peter said, sighing as he calmed down again. "Come on MJ, you have to admit, it was pretty funny..."

"I don't think my dad invading my privacy is particularly funny..." MJ replied.

Peter sighed.

"Do you mind if...I have a quick shower?" Peter said.

MJ shook her head. She looked _sad_ now, and Peter hated it.

"Okay." Peter said. "I'm sorry we didn't....I mean I can-"

"Peter, just go get ready, okay?" MJ said, grabbing her sweats from the end of the bed now.

Peter just swallowed. He nodded, before backing up and making his way into MJ's bathroom.

His heart sank as he closed the door shut behind him. He wished he hadn't laughed - in fact, part of him wanted to go back in there, climb unto the bed, and finish what they had both started.

But he wasn't _that_ brave.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Even though Peter got a C in his English Literature midterm, he could still recall paying attention when his teacher talked about 'pathetic fallacy', and he was pretty sure that the rain that was now starting to fall hard and fast from the sky kind of signified what he was feeling.

Peter had just helped Walter carry all of MJ's things down the stairs and into the trunk of his car and he suddenly wished that he hadn't let MJ fold so many clothes into it, because it was very heavy.

Him and MJ had insisted that they didn't want any breakfast and that they weren't hungry, but May had practically forced them to to eat a bowl of fruit that Sophia had cut up, and down a large glass of water each. Peter was _glad_ May had done that though, because now he felt slightly better about having to drive MJ to the airport.

As Peter shut the trunk shut and held an umbrella over his head to shelter himself from the rain, MJ stood next to him in grey sweats and a matching sweater. She was wearing those familiar Nike's and Peter's heart sank even more knowing that he would never see her wearing them around school again.

"Do you have everything you need, MJ?" Walter asked.

May and Walter stood under another umbrella, watching them both. Peter now just wanted to leave as quickly as possible without making a scene.

"Yeah Dad, I do..." MJ replied, solemnly. She had that annoyed expression on her face like she did the day her Dad interrogated her about the night of Liz's party.

"Your money? A portable charger?" May added, as MJ nodded and forced a smile at her.

"Well, you better get going...it's seriously starting to pour now..." Walter said.

MJ hesitated a bit but then walked over to her dad to hug him. He wrapped his arms tightly around her and kissed her forehead as she protested.

"See you soon baby, I love you..." Walter said. "Call me at every stage okay? Be good for your mom as well."

"I will..." MJ sighed. "Love you too, Dad."

May stretched her arms out towards MJ and she hugged her as well.

"Bye sweetie..." May said. "We'll miss you. Peter, makes sure she gets on that plane in one piece."

Peter nodded at May before shoving his hands in his pockets.

"Thanks for everything May..." MJ said, as she let go. May and Walter quickly retreated into the doorway as the rain got heavier and Peter quickly got into the driver's seat as MJ got in next to him.

Peter and MJ turned to look outside the window for a second and they waved bye again and Walter and May waved back frantically. A few seconds later, they disappeared through the front door again and they were gone.

MJ took a deep breath before putting on her seatbelt. Peter turned to look at her. He was always looking at her these days. Her hair was half wet from the rain, and Peter loved the way her skin still seemed to glow without makeup. She still had her a small gold necklace on that had her initials embedded into the pendant.

Peter thought about how upset she was last night and how she panicked about now wanting to go. He really hoped that for her sake, she would have a good time in Chicago, and that the weeks that they were apart for would just fly by.

"Are you ready?" Peter finally asked.

"Huh?" MJ said, turning to look at him. She had just been staring into space. "Yeah, I'm ready...let's go..."

Peter nodded quickly before putting on his own seatbelt and starting the car. As he reversed away from MJ's house and onto the road, he was reminded of that day they ditched school, and suddenly he wanted to be back in that house, lying down next to her on the floor, drinking milkshakes.

"Is your headache better?" Peter asked MJ, as he turned on the car radio.

"A little bit..." MJ replied. "Don't worry, my Dad made me put a whole pharmacy in my backpack so I'll be good..."

Peter smiled before turning to look at her and she turned back to look at him.

"Eyes on the road, dumbass..." MJ said, before laughing, and Peter laughed too.

There was a silence as they both continued to listen to a podcast that was on the radio. Peter wanted to switch channels at first but once he gave it a chance, he realized that is was actually quite interesting - there was something intriguing about hearing about other people's 'most embarrassing moments'. MJ occasionally laughed at it too and Peter suddenly remembered how he had blurted out last night that he _loved_ hearing her laugh.

"Do you think Maya broke up with Oscar?..." MJ said randomly, as Peter made a sharp turn.

He hadn't really thought about that up until now.

"Um, I mean, probably..." Peter said. "I don't think Oscar is in the right frame of mind to be in a relationship right now."

There was another silence and MJ rested her head against the car window.

"Are you..." Peter started. "Gonna tell your mom...about everything that happened?"

"I don't know..." MJ replied. "Should I? My dad told me to talk to her about it...but I just think it's a bit weird. It's like - 'hi mom, thanks for abandoning me all these years, things have literally _sucked_ while you've been gone...oh, and by the way, some asshole basically pinned me down and fucked me at this party earlier this semester -"

"MJ..." Peter said, interrupting her, his voice trailing off.

Peter couldn't tell if she was slightly angry or just simply trying to get her point across but he didn't think that MJ had ever been that blunt about what had happened to her before.

"Sorry..." He said, shaking his head. "It was kind of stupid for me to suggest that-"

"It's not your fault, Peter..." MJ said. "And you were right...I have to stop pretending like it didn't happen...because it did. And I guess I have to talk about it more...so maybe I _will_ tell her."

"Sure?" Peter said.

"Yeah..." MJ said. "Just...maybe not on the first night."

Peter wished they didn't even need to be having this conversation. He wished he had taken her home that night before it was too late, so that all of this wouldn't be happening right now, and MJ wouldn't have to be moving schools.

They had run into a little bit of traffic, so Peter used this as an opportunity to reach over with his free hand and interlock MJ's fingers with his. He thought about how he didn't want to forget what touching her felt like.

"You're not annoying, Parker..." MJ said, as Peter felt her turn back to look at him. "I didn't mean what I said."

"I know..." Peter replied. "You say stuff you don't mean all the time...and so do I..."

MJ squeezed Peter's hand.

"Will you FaceTime me tonight?..." MJ asked. "And leave your phone on...like you did the last time?"

"Yeah, of course..." Peter said.

"Don't forget."

"I won't."

Peter didn't know why he wished that they would never arrive at the airport, because it was obviously inevitable and they eventually _would_ arrive. His mind was just a never-ending countdown, stripping away the minutes that he had left with MJ.

Once they got to the terminal, it had stopped raining but it was still freezing - typical of New York, Peter thought.

It was now eight thirty in the morning and Peter knew that MJ only had an hour and a half until her flight left. He didn't know why half of him was hoping that she would miraculously miss her plane and never have to leave.

Once Peter had found a decent parking spot, he helped MJ get her large suitcase back out of the trunk, and he had insisted on helping her carry it in, even though she had said over and over again that she could do it.

Peter _hated_ airports.

Maybe it was because it was always so loud and there were a bunch of strangers roaming about. Maybe it was because he never quite knew where he was going and the multitude of signs just confused him.

Or maybe it was because thirteen years ago, his parents had driven to that same airport and had never come back.

MJ seemed to be slightly less on edge than he was, knowing exactly where to go, and speaking to the lady at the check-in desk in a happy and polite manner. Peter was astonished that MJ's bag hadn't succeeded the weight limit.

As MJ called her Dad to give him a quick update, Peter calculated that they had approximately fifteen minutes left until MJ _really_ had to get through to security and get going.

"Should we sit over here for a bit?" Peter said, gesturing to a couple of seats by the entrance.

MJ nodded, and her and Peter sat down next to each other.

MJ scrolled on her phone for a bit before putting it back in her bag and laying her head down on Peter's shoulder.

His heart begun to race a little bit.

 _This is it,_ he thought. _This is the hardest part. I'm going to have to say goodbye to you, MJ...and it really sucks. You're going away for three and a half weeks, and even when you come back, I'll never really see you. Because you won't be at Midtown anymore. I won't see you in Physics...or debate club. I'll never get to take you to prom or get you into another 'Senior' party...but maybe that's for the best._

"You okay?" Peter said to MJ, putting his arm around her.

MJ didn't reply, and Peter honestly thought he was going to have a heart attack.

_Please be okay, MJ. Please say something witty or stupid right now so that we can both laugh about it._

But she didn't.

Peter glanced down at his watch. Eight minutes left.

"MJ?...." Peter said, sitting up and turning to look at her face. There were tears frozen in her eyes, and she looked a little nervous.

"Yeah?" MJ said, her voice quiet.

"Are you _okay_?" Peter said again, softly.

"Mm hmm..." MJ replied, nodding. But Peter knew what she wasn't.

He placed his hand on her cheek and kissed her lips quickly.

"MJ...you can cry if you want...okay?" Peter said, looking at her right in the eyes. "I know you don't want to...but it's _okay..."_

MJ nodded, as tears finally escaped her eyes.

"You've been through so much, MJ..." Peter said, stroking her hair. "With everything that happened...and then all the shit you took for it in school...and now, you're leaving...it's a lot. You're a human being...and you still have all those feelings inside you...so you can let them out, okay?"

MJ just continued to look at him, and as she cried, Peter was sure that his heart was breaking.

"I just...don't want you...to go back there...without me..." MJ cried, struggling to get her words out. Peter knew she was talking about Midtown.

He didn't want to cry too. He didn't want to make things worse.

"MJ...don't worry about me..." Peter whispered, shaking his head. "I want you to be happy, okay? I want you to be _you,_ your best self, the MJ _I_ know and love...and I want you to surround yourself with the people that care about you..."

"I want _you_...to be happy too..." MJ sobbed. "And me leaving you.... _isn't_ going to make you happy."

"MJ, it's okay..." Peter whispered, kissing her forehead. "Don't worry about me. I'll be fine, trust me. I've got Ned and May to help me through it."

MJ moved so that she was sitting on Peter's lap. She lay her head on his shoulder again and wrapped her arms around him. He put his arms around her too, rubbing her back as she cried.

"I'm gonna miss you a _lot,_ Peter." MJ said.

"Me too..." Peter replied.

He could feel her tears on his shoulder and her curly hair against his neck. She sat up again to look at him.

"What are you gonna do tonight at seven?..." Peter asked her.

"Call you..." MJ replied, as Peter nodded.

"And what's the first thing that you're gonna do when you see your mom?"

"Hug her...and tell her that I love her..."

MJ's voice cracked up again.

"And if any other boys try to talk to you..." Peter said, smiling. "What are you gonna do?"

"Tell them...to fuck off..." MJ laughed, tears still falling hot and fast down her face.

There was short silence as MJ stared into Peter's eyes some more. He wiped her wet cheeks with his fingers and she ran her hands through his hair, like she always did.

She leant down to kiss him quickly and he kissed her back.

"I love you..." MJ said softly, looking at him.

She put her face close to his so that their cheeks were touching. Peter wanted to freeze this moment forever.

Not even any other moment he'd wanted to freeze before - just this one.

He shut his eyes for a second, as if it would help slow down time.

"How much?" he whispered.

He was still holding her close.

" _A lot."_ MJ replied, sniffing.

Peter looked up at her again, running his fingers up and down her back like he always did.

"You know I love you too..." Peter said.

"How much?"

"I've never loved anyone...like I love you MJ. I mean it."

MJ kissed Peter's cheek, slowly.

"Thanks...for everything..." she said. "For always being there when I needed you..."

"It's okay..." Peter said, his throat starting to hurt a little bit.

They stayed in that moment a little while longer. Until MJ's sobs started to fade and until Peter has decided that it was _definitely_ time for her to go.

As he walked with her over to the other side of the airport, and watched her drag her case behind her, he saw _MJ._

The same girl that had asked him to get her into Liz's party. The same girl that would move her desk over to his in Physics so she could copy his classwork.

The same girl that would sit next to him at lunch when Ned was sick, and would make fun of him for staring over at the Senior table, claiming that he was salivating over every girl on it.

She was just MJ. Finally...it was all over, Peter thought. She was just MJ, and Peter loved her _so much_ for it. Sometimes, she could push the people that loved her away, and sometimes she was hurt...and sometimes she just wanted to repress all her emotions.

But that was _all_ MJ.

Maybe somehow, fate had brought them together. They didn't have the most _normal_ start to their relationship, but Peter had kind of learnt to accept it now. It was an accidental love that he had fallen into, so fast that he didn't even notice.

A month ago, if there was one person on this _universe_ , that Peter thought he would never end up with, then it would have been her.

But somehow, he _had_ ended up with her. Just at the right time.

Peter gave MJ one last hug, holding her a little tighter than before.

"I'll see you soon..." MJ said, breaking away from the hug and smiling at him. "I'm glad you told me to cry...I feel a lot better now."

"I'll see you soon too..." Peter said. "Tell your mom how amazing I am..."

"I will..." MJ smiled, laughing a little.

She finally let go of his hand and walked towards the security queue. Peter thought about how everything had built up to this moment, and how it was nearly over.

She looked back at him and smiled again, and as he smiled back at her, she disappeared from his sight.

 _That's it,_ Peter thought. _It's over._

Just like that, he'd let her go.

For some reason, he knew she was going to love it in Chicago. He remembered her mom's face in that photo on MJ's bedside table and knew that she was going to take care of her.

Someone had to...at least while he couldn't.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


As Peter drove back to MJ's house, he felt his heart sinking. He was itching to pick up the phone and text her:

_'Miss you already. :/'_

_'Hey, have you boarded yet?'_

_'Only 24 days till you fly back.'_

Thoughts of what he wanted to _say_ to her, what he wanted to _do_ to her, when he saw her next were already running through his mind.

He just couldn't get over the fact that she was just sitting across from him, and now she was gone. And when she would be back, a lot of things would have changed.

 _She_ would change, inevitably.

He turned on the radio, as he swallowed. The music drowned out his thoughts but it didn't drown out how he was feeling. All he could think about was MJ mouthing the words to the songs, her hair loosely straggled around her face, her eyes brown and wide.

She had become a _part_ of Peter. Loving her was the part of Peter that made him feel sane and gave him a purpose. That made him forget about being popular or how lonely it got without parents to argue with. It was the part of him that he was the most scared of losing.

When he pulled up back at MJ's house, Walter and May were already standing in front of the driveway, May with Peter's bag in her hand. They looked deep in conversation, and Peter wondered whether he should just wait in the car or get out.

But then he saw Walter starting to walk towards him and open  the car door.

"Peter, thank you so much." He said, as Peter climbed out of the car. "Michelle...I mean...MJ just texted me. She's on board."

"Great." Peter gulped, trying not to sound too sad.

May was across for them, loading her and Peter's things into the back of her car.

"Are you okay, honey?" She asked, looking over at Peter.

"Yeah, yeah...May, I'm fine." Peter said, putting a hand behind his neck.

May smiled at Peter. She closed the trunk shut then walked over to him and kissed him on the cheek. She had definitely had a shower because her whole body smelt of coconut and she looked very happy - a kind of happy that Peter hadn't seen in a long time.

"We should get going. I can't be late for lunch with Sara - and I invited Ned over." May said.

"Really?" Peter asked.

"I figured you would need some company." May replied, walking over to Walter now.

Walter pulled May into a hug. It was a long hug, and as Peter watched the embrace, it made him miss MJ even more.

"Thank you for everything, Walter." She said.

"No problem, May." Walter said, before clearing his throat. "I'll see you two around."

May turned around to walk to her car and Peter turned around too, but he felt Walter's hand on his shoulder, turning him around.

"Thank _you_ Peter." Walter began. "You've been a really good friend to her...through all of this...I don't know what she would have done without you."

_Friend? Peter thought._

"I believe you're aware that we're moving downtown when MJ gets back."

Peter nodded. He wasn't sure if that was fully confirmed but he had guessed it was going to happen.

"Yes, Mr. Jones." Peter said.

Walter nodded.

"I know you two will keep in touch, though." Walter said. "There's always FaceTime...and we can plan visits from time to time-"

"I'm her _boyfriend._ " Peter blurted out. "Sorry, Mr. Jones...I'll definitely make time to see her-"

"Yes, but it won't be easy." Walter said, letting go of Peter's shoulder now. "I just don't want you getting...too attached...that's all. I mean, she's moving schools. There'll be a new social setting, new parties, you know how it goes -"

"I know." Peter nearly hissed. He wanted the conversation to just be over. "Goodbye Mr. Jones."

And with that, Peter joined May in the car. She was driving, and Peter was glad because he wasn't in the mood to drive.

As May reversed out of the driveway, she reached out to put one hand on Peter's lap.

"What's on your mind?" She asked.

Peter had his head on the window. His throat was burning.

"Walter just called me MJ's _friend."_ Peter muttered.

"You know he doesn't mean that -"

"No, he meant it clearly. I've done my best. I just...I just don't know why he still doesn't like me."

"Of course he likes you." May sighed. "Peter, you're overreacting."

"He doesn't like _me._ He just likes that I make MJ happy." Peter continued. "I'll never be good enough for her in his eyes - I'm not rich...like Andrew-"

"Peter!" May exclaimed now. "Stop."

Peter opened his mouth to say something else but then decided not to say anything at all.

There was silence all the way back home, as they parked the car, as they were in the elevator, as May unlocked the apartment door, as Peter walked into his room and shut the door behind him.

He threw his bag on the floor before putting his head in his hands.

"Breathe..." He said to himself, as he inhaled and exhaled.

He was mentally and physically exhausted. He checked his phone, as he climbed into bed.

No messages from MJ. No missed calls.

He couldn't resist the urge to text her.

 _'Call me when you land."_ He wrote.

And just as he sent it, he heard a knock on the door before May came in. She was in a dark pink sleeveless dress and her hair was in a ponytail.

She walked over and sat at the edge of his bed.

"I've gotta go to lunch." She said. "Ned should be here in a few hours."

Peter reached over to put his phone by his bedside table before nodding.

"Remember what we agreed?" She said. "No more secrets. Peter, just tell me exactly how you feel."

Peter could feel his heart aching. He reached out to hold her hand, and as she squeezed it, he felt a stinging sensation in the back of his eyes.

"Oh, Peter." May whispered, kicking off her flat shoes and climbing into the bed with him.

Peter moved over, tears streaming down his face now.

May put one hand over his body and he lay her head on her chest.

In that moment, he felt completely vulnerable. It was the same way she would pull him in when he was small, and he couldn't sleep in his room alone. Or the night of Uncle Ben's funeral, after Peter had his first panic attack.

"I'm sorry." Peter mumbled.

"Shhh..." May whispered. "It's okay."

"I miss her...already." He said. "May, I miss her _so_ much."

"I know, I know."

"And I'm never gonna see her, May..." Peter said, blinking, as more tears fell down his face. "And she's gonna go to this crazy school where she's gonna have to be studying _all_ the time...and I'll never get to go to her place..."

"Peter...yes you will." May said, rubbing his arm.

"Why do all the people I love...leave?" Peter asked.

She didn't say anything to him. He just felt her lips on his cheek.

He thought about last night and how _he_ had been the one holding MJ, and comforting her, and as May rubbed his arm, he felt sleepier and sleepier.

"Get some rest before Ned comes, okay?" Peter heard May say.

And Peter did what she told him. As thoughts of MJ clouded his mind, he fell asleep.  
  
  
  
  


_*Tap, tap, tap.*_

Peter had one of those headaches that he always got when he thought about too many things at once before he fell asleep and woke up too quickly.

_*Tap, tap, tap.*_

He thought he was back in his Chemistry class, listening to Ned tapping his pencil against the desk. He thought about all the times he would stare aimlessly at calculations on the board while daydreaming about Liz.

Now, _all_ he could think about was MJ. He wondered if she had gotten back to her mom's house okay and when next he could speak to her. All he wanted to do was tell her how much he loved her.

_*Tap, tap, tap*_

Peter's foggy brain had disguised Ned's faint knock as the tapping that irked him in so many different ways. He sat up suddenly, and realized that he was out of breath for no reason.

"Come in Ned..." Peter sighed, as Ned appeared through his door. He was wearing a hat like he always did, even though they were _indoors_ , but Peter didn't seem to mind it.

"You okay Peter?..." Ned asked, sitting down on the chair at Peter's desk and wheeling himself around in it.

"Yeah...um...I just took a nap, I guess..." Peter said, realizing that May was now gone and that he probably had the worst bed hair ever. He thought about one of the nights when he'd stayed at MJ's house and how she'd commented that she kinda liked when his hair looked like that.

Ned pulled out his phone from the pocket of his jeans and flipped the screen to show Peter something on it.

"Look..." Ned said. "Oscar. Deleted from my contacts forever."

Peter didn't even know what to say back to that, so he didn't say anything.

"So...MJ's gone now..." Ned continued, staring up at Peter's wall. "And I was told to come here to cheer you up...so what do you wanna do?"

"You don't have to cheer me up Ned..." Peter said, getting out of bed and pulling his Midtown sweatshirt over his head. All he could think about was MJ telling him to take it off last night.

He opened up a drawer underneath his bed and put on a short sleeved shirt because he also realized that he had been burning up in his sleep. Ned just stared at him while he did this.

"Dude, I _know_ you're upset..." Ned sighed. "You choose. Video games or building that Lego White House we were talking about?"

"Video games...I guess...I mean...does it matter?" Peter said, completely out of it. He didn't think he'd felt this depressed in a while. He started pulling things out of his bag in the hope to find a pair of shorts to put on and then pulled out MJ's bra.

Ned's eyes widened.

"You have her _bra_ , Peter?" he said, laughing a little. "Are you serious?"

"Shut up..." Peter muttered. "She _wanted_ me to take it."

"So, you're gonna jerk off to her _bra_ while she's gone?" Ned asked, leaning forward in his chair.

" _No._ God, Ned-"

"Sorry Pete, but what _else_ would you do with it? Three weeks without sex is a very _long_ time...for you at least."

Peter just rolled his eyes before standing up and closing his drawer shut with his foot.

"Why don't _you_ set up the game..." Peter said. "I'll be out there in a minute, I just need to check on MJ."

"Okay dude..." Ned sighed, before strolling out of Peter's room and closing the door shut.

Peter immediately reached over for his phone. It had been hours since he last sent MJ all those messages and now he had a few messages from _her._

He didn't know why his heart skipped a beat. and as he frantically opened all of them, his eyes darted across the screen.

_'Touched down in Chicago. Are we still on for seven your time?'_

_'In the car with mom and she's driving me home. We both cried...a lot. Can't believe she's right here next to me.'_

_'Didn't realize how much I missed my mommy :('_

_'It's ten past seven your time...are you busy??'_

_'We can probably just talk tomorrow X. Just send me a message when you get this okay? Going out for dinner with mom.'_

_'Is it a good time to call you now?'_

_'Where are you? I left you a voice message, Parker.'_

"Shit..." Peter muttered under his breath, wishing that he hadn't fallen into such a deep sleep and missed MJ completely.

He checked his inbox for MJ's voice message and sighed before clicking on it.

Just her voice...that _voice_...made him feel like he was going to burst into tears again.

"Hi Peter...I think I'm gonna go to sleep in a bit...but reply to my messages when you get the chance...I left you a lot of them."

Peter didn't feel like crying again.

"My mom's...so _cool,_ Peter. Like...she's amazing...I wish you could meet her. Her place is super cozy and I'm sitting by this really warm fire...anyway, it was just so _weird_ seeing her again at first. But...she's so _happy_ Peter. Maybe her leaving was a good thing...I don't know...I haven't told her about the whole situation yet but there's time...for me to open up to her more, you know?"

Peter shut his eyes. He imagined her in his room with him, pushing her hair away from her face and looking up at him with her beautiful brown eyes.

"Anyway..." he heard MJ's voice say. "Make sure you _call_ me tomorrow, Parker. I'm helping mom do some last minute Christmas shopping so maybe I'll get you a late present...I love you...and I'm not just throwing my words away without thinking about them again...I actually love you. And I miss you...bye Peter."

He wanted to call her back right at that instant...but he figured that she might be asleep already.

The contentment in her voice made him so happy but so _pained_ at the same time. He started to think of what he wanted to say to her.

_Your mom loves you MJ...I told you she'd love you. You're her only daughter. You're gonna have the most amazing Christmas. So amazing...that you won't wanna leave. But you will_ _eventually._

_When you get back to New York, your Dad will move you downtown and you'll go to Hillside High. People won't call you names and people won't make fun of you. They'll respect you because you're so...fucking smart...and beautiful. You'll make all these new friends and you'll start to forget about all those people you used to hate._

_I'll see you once in a while and it'll be enough for some time...but then maybe you'll move on. Maybe you'll finally go to another party...and one of your rich friends will introduce you to some guy that your Dad will like way better than me._

_So who hurt you?_

_Maybe I did._

_Maybe I shouldn't have fallen for you knowing that one day...it'll hurt you to have to leave me. Maybe I shouldn't have yelled at you that day you were on your bike, ready to ride away from school. Maybe I should have stood up for you when they called you a slut...when they made those awful pages on social media._

_Maybe...when those people at Liz's party where laughing at me...I should have grabbed your hand. You would have protested and said something insulting to me...but at least I would have made us leave together. Maybe you'd still hate me now...but maybe I could live better with myself knowing that you didn't care about me._

_I love you so much, it hurts._ _MJ,_ _I wish it didn't hurt so much._

_And I finally know what_ _really_ _happened to you._

_It was me._

_I changed the way you saw the people you loved...and you did the same for me. You made me realize what was important. You made me realize that I didn't need the satisfaction of being 'popular'...or having the most friends. It was stupid for me to even care about those things in the first place...after all...you never did._

_I don't wanna lose what we have. I wish we could hold on to it forever._

_I promise, MJ._

_You know I promise that I'll try._

_Promise me that you'll try too._

 


End file.
